


Stockholm Syndrome (Larry Stylinson)

by British_1D_Irish



Category: One Direction, One Direction (Band), Zayn Malik (Musician), directioners
Genre: BoyxBoy, Fanfiction, Larry Stylinson Is Real, M/M, directioner - Freeform, larry stylinson - Freeform, one direction - Freeform, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-24 21:13:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 36
Words: 109,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7523329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/British_1D_Irish/pseuds/British_1D_Irish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"What do you think you're doing, love?" He asked, and I gulped at how dark his voice sounded. The sane part of me was absolutely terrified of it, and I didn't like it, but the part of me that thought Louis was incredible was so turned on by his dark side.</p><p>"Answer the question." He said as he squeezed my wrist tighter, and I winced a bit, but I didn't answer the question. "Were you trying to leave? Were you trying to run away from me?" He asked, and I felt his nails digging into my skin. I gave a small yelp of pain and then he was dragging me harshly by my arm down the hall again.</p><p>He passed the room that I was was staying in before and opened another door that was three doors down. He pushed me inside, and I couldn't see a thing. The room was completely dark. I began to breathe faster because I've never been a big fan of the dark. I hated it. i didn't like what I couldn't see.</p><p>I jumped as I felt a hand on my waist and my breath caught as I felt a surge of electricity run through me. I felt him pull me closer to him until my back was against his chest. His lips rubbed against my ear, and he slowly whispered out, "You can't leave, Harry. You're never gonna get away. I'm not gonna let you."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Taken

**Author's Note:**

> Story contains vulgar language, smut scenes, and minor violence. Some scenes may also be triggering. Read with caution. All the love!

HARRY

"Okay, mum. Yes, I'll be home soon." I heard Niall say as I walked back into my room, returning from the restroom. "Goodbye. I love you,too." He hung up the phone and turned to me. "My mum wants me home soon, unless you want me to stay with you tonight? When are your parents suppose to be back?" He asked. My parents were gone for a business trip, since they own their own company, and they weren't going to be back tonight.

"I have no idea." I breathed out, and I sat on my bed as he sat next to me. "You don't have to stay though." I told him. I noticed that he scooted closer to me, and he put his hand on my knee. "What if I want to?" He asked me.

I turned to him, and he looked at me with longing and desperation. I always knew Niall had a crush on me, ever since we first became friends, but I felt nothing for him like that. He was my best friend and that's all he'll ever be. Without warning, he leaned into me, and he began to kiss me.

I closed my eyes tightly, and I mentally sighed. I gently pushed on Niall's chest until he pulled away. It hurt me everytime I had to reject him, but I just didn't feel the same way he did about me. "I'm sorry, Niall." I said as I saw the sadness in his eyes. He looked like he wanted to cry, and that made me want to cry, too. I did care about Niall deeply, but only in a friendly way.

"Please, Harry. I- I love you so much." He whimpered as he looked down at his hands, and I noticed a tear slip down his cheek. "Niall, I just don't feel the same way. You deserve to be happy. You need to move on to someone else." I said as I gently put a hand on his shoulder. He shook his head and looked up at me with determined eyes.

"Just once. Can you please kiss me back just once?" He asked. I opened my mouth to reject that idea, but he quickly added "Just once and I swear I will never try to kiss you again." He looked so torn down and broken, and I just couldn't say no to him.

I scooted closer to him and leaned in until our noses were touching. I heard his breath hitch, and he looked shocked that I was agreeing to this. Then, in one swift motion, he leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. This was the first time I've ever kissed him back because of the promise he made to not try again after this.

It wasn't that Niall was a bad kisser, because he was actually really good at it, it was only the fact that I didn't like him as more than my best friend that made everything awkward and uncomfortable. I was going to pull away, but Niall pressed his hand to the back of my head and held me close as our lips worked against one another.

He moaned into my mouth at all the pleasure and contentment he was receiving, and I wanted to just pull away, but his hands wouldn't let me. He pushed me backwards until I was lieing down on the bed, and he straddled me as he continued to kiss me. Now I wasn't kissing back and Niall seemed to notice as he desperately worked his lips on mine to try and get a response out of me. "Harry, please." He whispered and pressed our lips together again.

I slowly began to kiss him back, just hoping he would stop after this, and he sighed at that. His tongue licked across my bottom lip, and I gently pushed Niall back. "Niall, stop." I whispered and he looked down at me with a hurt look in his eyes.

He crawled off of me and began to ramble."I'm sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me." I sat up and shook my head, as I pulled him into a hug. "I don't hate you, Niall. You're my best friend." I said. 

"I love you." He whispered, and I squeezed my eyes shut at that, knowing he meant it in a lover's sort of way.

"Yeah, I love you, too, Ni." I said, but we both knew I meant a brotherly love, and I knew that's what killed Niall inside. "I should go now." He broke out of my hug and picked up his jacket he left on my desk chair. I walked with him through the hall, down the stairs, and to the front door. "Goodnight, Niall." I said as he stepped outside.

"Goodnight, Harry. Be careful." He said and then he turned to walk to his car. I closed the door once I heard his engine start and heard the crunch of the driveway's gravel, which signified that he pulled out of the driveway. Now that I'm alone in my big, mansion-like house, I sort of wished Niall did stay. These were two things I didn't enjoy. I wasn't a big fan of the dark, and I hated to be alone. I knew that I could call Niall and ask him to stay, but he may take that the wrong way and throughout our friendship I have tried to not lead him on in any way and made sure he knew how I felt about him.

I locked both locks on the front door and then set the alarm by the door on. I was such a sissy at times, but can you blame me? My parents were some of the richest people in the world, and I was being left home alone. I could risk sleeping over at Niall's, but that would mean he would probably try something else, regardless of what he swore. Besides, his house didn't really have enough room for more people. It was a small house because his parents didn't have much money. We have tried to help them out at times, but his mum will never accept the help. She appreciates the kindness, but says Bobby, Niall's dad, was too proud to accept the help. In a way, I understood. He was the man of the house and he wanted to provide for his family without needing any help, but it killed me at times when Niall would be upset at how far behind they were on rent.

I sighed at all my thoughts and then began to walk around the house, turning off the lights in every room. I kept one dim hallway light on downstairs and then walked up the stairs and back into my room. I changed out of my day clothes and into some sweats and a white t-shirt. I ran a hand through my curls before I pulled back my covers and then got into bed. I then turned off my lamp light and slowly drifted into a distressed sleep.

***************************

I jumped up when I heard the alarm going off. The beeping sound was loud, and it filled the whole house. I was still half asleep as I sat up in bed, and everything seemed so blurred. My heart began to race at a new kind of speed I as realized what the alarm was, and I quickly got out of bed. I grabbed my baseball bat from the corner of my room and then I cautiously opened my bedroom door. I peaked both ways down the hallway before walking out.

I walked towards the stairs and slowly walked down them. I froze when I almost tripped and the bat in my hand hit the wood of the stairs. I listened for any sounds but didn't hear any. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in and continued my way down the stairs. Once I reached the bottom, I looked to the front door and saw that it was wide open. My eyes widened in fear and then I heard something crash loudly onto the ground in the living room that was right through the arched wall beside me. I shrunk back against the wall and hid in the shadows.

I then heard two voices, and I held the bat tightly to me. "What the hell, Zayn! Be more careful!" One of them said in a sort of whispery-yell. The other guy replied and said "Who the hell cares? You said that they were out of town didn't you? So then why the hell should we have to be so careful with their stuff?" 

I peaked around the corner and saw two dark figures standing over a broken vase. I let out a gasp as I saw that one of them had a gun in his hand. Eventhough their features weren't prominent, I knew they both whipped their heads in my direction when I gasped. I ducked back behind the wall and listened quietly. "Did you hear that?" The guy, who's name was apparently Zayn, asked. The other guy gave a hum as a response and then spoke up. "Didn't Louis say they had a son? Think he stayed?" I guess Zayn nodded or something, but all I heard were footsteps walking towards me.

I held in my gasp as I quickly ran up the stairs and down the hallway, back into my room. I closed the door quietly as I heard footsteps thudding up the stairs. I didn't know what to do, so I quickly dived underneath my bed and crawled all the way to the back of it, near the wall. I put my hand over my mouth to suppress my heavy breaths that I was giving. My hand was shaking and the bat was left lieing on the floor beside me. What the hell was I going to do? The alarm was my only hope. If the police got here fast enough then I would be fine.

I heard footsteps getting closer to my room and the voices were audible again. "Come out, come out wherever you are!" The Zayn guy called out, and I shut my eyes. This wasn't happening. I heard a door get pushed open and then the other guy said "This room's clear. Check the others." I guess they were working their way down the hall, checking every room. I heard multiple doors get thrown open, but I froze in place when my bedroom door opened up, and I saw two pairs of feet walk inside. "He's gotta be in here somewhere." The guy who's name I didn't know said.

"Why are we wasting our time looking for a kid, Liam? Why can't we just find the safe and get out?" Zayn said. Guess Mr. No Name was Liam. "He could know the combination and that would save us plenty of time trying to open it." Liam said. So far he sounded like the reasonable one while Zayn sounded like the type of guy to just get in and get out.

"I guess." He mumbled as he opened up my closet door and looked around inside. Liam went to the restroom and began to look behind the shower curtains and underneath the sink. They were both busy looking around when I noticed my phone light up. It was on the counter next to my bed and it illuminated the corner of my room. Quietly, I slid over to the edge of the bed and quickly swiped it off the charger. I looked at it and saw that Niall was calling. It was barely 2:15 in the morning. What could he possibly want? Either way, I was glad he called.

I answered it and Niall's voice was heard. "Harry? Are you still up? Listen, I'm sorry to be calling so late, or early, but I can't stop thinking about that kiss. I know you don't like me the way I like you, but it meant everything to me, Haz." He continued to ramble on, but stopped to listen when he heard me whispering.

"Listen, Niall. I need you to call the police." I whispered ever so quietly, and I heard Niall's confused voice ask why. "There are two men in my home, Niall. Call the police, now." I said, and I heard Niall move around in the background. "Are you okay, Harry? Did they hurt you?" He asked worriedly.

"No, Ni, but call the cops, okay?" I asked and Niall gave a shaky yeah before he said "Okay. I will. I-I love you, Harry." That was all I heard before I pressed end call on my phone and then I gave a sigh of relief, until I felt hands wrap around my waist and pull. I screamed and kicked at the guy, but my attempts seemed even more futile as the second guy joined him and held my arms down while he held my legs.

"Well, well, well. Looks like we found you." I recognized the dark haired guys voice and knew he was Zayn. The other guy, Liam, looked at me with sorry eyes and then Zayn spoke up again. "Where's the safe, kid?" He asked. I knew exactly what he was referring to. My dad kept a safe full of lots of money in his downstairs office, but I shook my head and said "I don't know."

He gave me a dark, sinister smirk and said "Don't lie to me. I don't like being lied to." I gulped as he held the gun up and pressed the cool barrel to my temple. I felt tears build in my eyes as I gave out a shaky reply. "It- it's-"

I was interrupted by the approaching sound of sirens and both of the men jumped. I used their distraction and kicked Zayn in the stomach while elbowing Liam in the ribs. They both let go of me, and I attempted to run out of the room, but I felt hands wrap around my waist, and I was being held back by Zayn. I gave a few whimpered cries as he held me close and shushed me. "Shh, shh, beautiful. You're going to be just fine." He said.

"We have to go, Zayn." Liam said as the sirens were sounding nearer and nearer. "Okay." Zayn replied before whispering in my ear. "You're coming with us, beautiful. We can't just leave you here to rat us out. Don't worry, you'll be just fine." He said, and I let more tears fall as his hand wrapped around my mouth, and he began to pull me towards my window that Liam was already out of. He was standing on the roof and he grabbed my hands to pull me out as Zayn also got out and closed the window behind them.

Liam looked at me in pity, but then grabbed me by my waist and began to carry me to the edge of the roof. Zayn went down the side of the house by a drain pipe and then Liam pushed me to follow after him. I was shaking in fear. I have a drastic fear of heights, and I felt faint as the floor looked so far below. "Just don't look down." Liam offered, and it surprisingly calmed me a bit. I slowly climbed down and gasped when I felt Zayn's warm hand on my exposed skin below my t-shirt as I reached the bottom.

"Come on, beautiful." He whispered and he pulled me down. I looked up and saw Liam already halfway down the pipe as Zayn pulled me away. He pulled me over to a car that was parked around the corner of the street and he shoved me in the backseat before locking the doors and climbing into the driver's seat. He then grabbed a rag and put something on it before leaning into the backseat and saying "Nothing personal." Then he pressed the rag against my face. The smell was horrid, and I felt my eyes begin to flicker open and shut as I fought the chemicals to stay awake.

"Don't fight it. Just sleep." His voice seemed so far away as my eye lids grew heavy, and they began to droop. I heard the car door open and close, and I guess it was just Liam getting into the car, but every sound sounded so distant, like it was muffled, yet clear at the same time. My head was spinning as I breathed in the scent of the chemicals on the rag that were suffocating my senses. I felt numb all over as my eyes closed shut and that was all I felt before I was knocked out into a deep sleep. One were I was still back at home, lieing in my bed and trying hard to go to sleep, but no matter what I couldn't close my eyes because something, or someone, was watching me.


	2. New Surroundings

I woke up with a groan and everything was all a blur when I opened my eyes. All I saw was a mixture of colors, and I had to blink several times until my vision came back to me. I was lying down on a small bed, and I was in a room that contained no windows. The walls were all bare, but I noticed a chair that was against the wall. It seemed like that was the only other piece of furniture in the whole entire room. That's when everything played back in my mind. I held my head as it became a dizzying rush of memory of the night before.

I remember having Niall over and just hanging out until he left. I remember that we kissed, and I was only worried about leading him on, but then my worries soon changed as I awoke to my house alarm ringing off. There were two guys that had broken into my house and they were looking for my dad's safe. I remember Niall calling me to tell me how he felt and begging him to call the cops. I remember the sirens in the distance as the two strangers took me out of the window. Lastly, I remember the rancid scent of the rag that Zayn pressed to my mouth and nose, knocking me out in the process.

I groaned as everything spun around in my head. A lot happened in such a short amount of time. I suddenly felt panicked as I realized that I was kidnapped, and I had no idea where I was. I jumped out of the bed and looked around for any way out. I saw the door and slowly worked my way to it, but froze once I saw the door knob twist. I fell backwards in shock as the door pushed open and in walked Liam.

He looked down at me and gave me a kind smile. I was shaking in fear as he held his hand out for me to help me up. I didn't accept his offer, instead I crawled backwards until my back hit the wood of the bed. Liam sighed and walked closer to me. "I'm not going to hurt you." He said quietly, but I didn't trust a word he said. He was my kidnapper, one of them anyway, how was I supposed to trust him? For all I know he was just waiting to hurt me in some way or form.

"Where- where am I?" I shakily asked, and he then sat criss-crossed in the floor in front of me. I held my knees to my chest as he smiled kindly at me again. Something told me not to fear him, but it was hard to listen to that as he basically shoved me out of my window and made me climb down a drain pipe just to take me to wherever I currently was. "I can't really tell you much, but you're at our hideout. I'm actually surprised you're awake. Most people would be knocked out for a while longer." He commented and my eyes widened at that news. "You've kidnapped someone before?" I asked, and he nodded slowly. "It kind of comes with the job."

We both sat in silence as I let everything sink in. I looked over at Liam and took in his features. He had dark brown hair and kind brown eyes, but he was a kidnapper and a thief. Him and Zayn were. These guys who took me have done something like this before and I really don't want to know what happened to the other people they took. Was it really even necessary to take me? Sure, I had their faces identified, but it's not like I could have told the police much apart from their appearances. For all I know we were in another country or something. That thought made me panic.

"What country are we in?" I asked and Liam gave a soft chuckle. "We're still in the U.K. Don't worry about it too much though." He said. What was that supposed to mean? How could I not be worried about where I was currently residing? More like being held against my will.

"Are you hungry?" Liam asked me and I shook my head, but my stomach betrayed me at the mention of food and it growled at that moment. Liam laughed at that and said "I'll get you something. You need to eat. I'll be right back." He said and then he got up to leave. The door shut behind him, and I heard a click of a lock. I relaxed a bit as multiple thoughts on how to escape from here ran through my mind, each one seeming too risky to go through with.

If I made a run for it, I could get caught. Plus, I didn't exactly know where in the U.K. I was, so I could just as easily get lost. I could try to fight my way out, but I was never really the strong type. I never really developed much muscle, I just seemed like I had it. I could try to call for help or something, but I didn't have my phone and there was probably nobody within the area that would hear me screaming. It seemed like no matter what route I would take, it would fail miserably. 

My head snapped to the door as it opened up again, and I expected to see Liam walking in, but dark hair came into view and then I was staring at Zayn. His features were dark, yet very attractive. His eyelashes were so dark that it seemed as if he wore eyeliner around his eyes. He had tattoos on his arms, and I noticed one poking out from the collar of his shirt, but I couldn't tell what it was of. I looked up at his face and he smirked at me. "Finally awake, aye beautiful." Whenever he called me that it freaked me out. It made my skin crawl in an unpleasant way, but he didn't seem to care.

"I'm glad Louis made us raid that house." I raised an eyebrow at the new name, but then remembered that I've heard it before from Liam's lips when they heard me gasp back at my home. My best guess was that this guy was their leader or something, and I took in the new information. I sucked in a breath as Zayn came forward and pulled me off of the ground by my arm. His fingers were warm, and I remember when they were grasping my hips as I climbed down the drain pipe of my house.

I held back a shiver, and he pulled me towards him. The door was open, and I thought about making a dash for it, regardless of consequences. I could probably make it if I really tried hard enough. But Zayn seemed to know what I was thinking as he chuckled and looked at me. "Don't even think about trying to run away, beautiful." He said and this time I got mad. 

"Can you stop calling me that?" I asked in a rude tone, but he just smirked at me again. He was really irritating.

"You are, though." He said and then I was being pushed against the wall of the room. The door was kicked closed, and I was trapped with Zayn. I froze in fear as his hand gripped my waist and his other came up to my cheek. "Your skin is so soft." He whispered as he rubbed my cheek gently with his hand. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I was absolutely terrified right now. "You're so fucking hot." He said and then I noticed he was leaning into me. I pushed myself against the wall and began to turn my head away to avoid his lips, but then he stopped as a voice called his name. I looked over and saw a guy standing there.

"Leave him alone, Zayn." He said, and I was frozen. Not because I was scared, though I was scared shitless, but because he was the most beautiful human being I have ever laid eyes on. His hair was in a sort of shaggy fringe, his eyes were a cold blue color, his lips were set into a perfect heart shape, and his skin was a lovely tanned color. I didn't even think about the fact that Zayn had me against the wall because all I was thinking about was how beautiful the guy was and how his voice was all raspy and wonderful.

"C'mon, Louis. I was just having a bit of fun. Can you really blame me?" Zayn asked, and he bit his lip as his eyes lingered to mine. My lips were parted as I let out scared puffs of breath. Zayn's eyes were a shade darker than they were when he first walked into the room and it honestly scared the hell out of me. His hands were still on me, but he hesitantly got off as Louis spoke through his teeth. "Zayn, back the fuck off of him." He said.

Zayn seemed to glare at Louis, but then he just turned and left the room. I was so confused right now, but I had to sit down as my head was spinning from all the fear I felt. I sat on the edge of the bed and I just wanted to scream and cry, but I couldn't bring myself to do anything but sit there with my eyes closed and take slow breaths. "Are you okay?" I heard Louis ask and I remembered that he was in the room. I jumped as I felt his hand on my shoulder, and he lifted it off automatically.

"Hey, calm down." He said and he then turned and walked into a closet. I heard him shuffling around before he came back out with a pair of clothes and handed them to me."Why am I here?" I asked as I held the clothes to me and he looked at me with careful eyes. He seemed to be trying not to give too much away. 

"That's not really important. All you need to know is to stay put. I will not hesitate to hurt you if you try to run away." He said it like a promise, and I was instantly terrified of this guy.

"Liam will be here with your food in a bit. Don't try anything, and don't be stupid." He said and then he walked out of the door, locking it behind him, leaving me alone in the nearly empty room.

***************************

I stared at the clothes Louis placed in my hands a while ago and then swallowed the lump in my throat. I hated my life right now. Maybe this was karma for all the times I rejected Niall and made him feel low. Maybe I should have just given him a chance and maybe then none of this would be happening. Am I just an awful person? Do I really deserve this?

I sighed as I got up and picked up the black long sleeve that was handed to me. I lifted up my shirt, pulling it off, and replaced it with the black one. Then, I pulled my sweats down and pulled on the black skinny jeans that were lent to me. I guess the black matches my emotions right now. I feel void and depressed, so black compliments me well right now. I stared at my clothes and just wanted to burn them. They would be a memory of the night I was taken and I hated it. I hated living through this. Why didn't Zayn just shoot me when he had the chance?

I was sucked out of my thoughts when there was a small knock on the door and then it was unlocked and pushed open. I wasn't surprised to see Liam walk in with a plate of food and a glass in his hand. He seemed to be the only one that I can actually talk to, and I guess I should play nice with him if I want to get through this experience. "Hey, Harry. Here you go." He said as he placed the food down onto the bed. He placed the glass on the floor and then asked "Do you want me to take your clothes and wash them?" I shook my head and he nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry you have to go through this." He said, and I felt a tear slip down my cheek.

"Why am I here?" I asked and he gave a heavy breath out of his lips. "Harry, I-"

"Please just tell me, Liam. What did I do to be here?" I asked, and he saw how hopeless I looked, and how broken I felt. Honestly, if I looked into a mirror right now I think I would match Niall's expression whenever I rejected him. Liam sighed and sat down on the bed. He patted the other side of the bed and I sat where he told me to. "It has nothing to do with you personally, more of who your parents are." I guess that made a lot of sense considering how rich my parents were.

"So this is all about money?" I asked and Liam gave a sad nod. "Why do you need me then?" I asked and Liam sighed. "I'm not really supposed to say, but I'm thinking Louis is going to use this as a ransom. Get more money from your parents than we were originally going to steal." He said.

I looked down at my hands and fiddled with the sleeves of the shirt I was wearing. "Harry, don't worry. I promise that everything will be fine. Zayn and Louis can be a bit explosive at times, but I will handle everything. They won't hurt you." He said, and I nodded even though I wasn't so sure about that.

"You should eat." He said and I looked down at the plate and saw that it had a pork chop on it and some corn to go along with it. I didn't really want to eat what they were giving me, but I felt my stomach rumble and I knew I was starving. I didn't really eat last night because I was busy just hanging out with Niall so it's been forever since I've eaten. I slowly reached for the spoon and plate, lifting them up before spooning up some corn and bringing it up to my lips. Liam smiled as I was finally eating and then he stood up. He ruffled my curls and said "I'll be back to check on you in a bit." I nodded as he walked to the door and made his way out of the room.

It didn't take me very long to finish up all the food on my plate and to drain the cup of water dry. I had no idea I was so hungry until I ate it all as if I was Niall eating a regular meal. God, I missed him so much, even if I always hurt him for not feeling the same way, he was still my best mate. 

I laid down on my back and wondered what time it was. It felt like I've been here forever and there was no clock, so I couldn't check what time it was. I laid there, staring at the ceiling fan that I hadn't noticed before, and I watched it just spin around and around. My eyes soon began to droop, but I was snapped out of my sleepy state as there was the familiar soft knock on the door and then in walked Liam. He smiled at me- in a fond way?- as he saw that I finished all my food.

"Guessing you were pretty hungry." He chuckled and then collected my plate and cup. "Do you want to take a shower?" He asked, and I didn't realize how dirty I felt until he said that. I nodded, a bit enthusiastically, and he laughed. "I'll bring you some stuff." He said, and I nodded again. I never really did talk much, except when I was with Niall because he was my only true friend.

Liam left and was back in record's time with some body wash, shampoo, conditioner, and a towel. I took them from him and he said "Follow me." I nodded as he led the way to the door. We both stepped out and I looked both ways down the narrow hallway. I seemed to continue on forever, but I knew it had an ending somewhere. I followed behind Liam until he stopped outside of a door and then pushed it open, revealing the toilet room. "You can take a bath or a shower, it doesn't matter." He said, and I walked into the room. 

"Thank you, Liam." I offered him a smile and this time he nodded as he accepted my thanks and made his way out of the door.

I locked the door behind him and then stripped off my clothes. I looked into the mirror, and I looked exactly how I imagined I did. My eyes held a hint of hopelessness and fear in them, but there was also a shadow of determination in them. My curls were a bit messy, as I had been knocked out for quite some time, and I looked awfully tired. I stopped looking into the mirror and turned to the shower. I stepped inside and turned it on. I closed my eyes as the warm water cascaded down my body, relieving the tension I didn't even know I was holding.

I began to wash my body and hair and after all the necessities were done, I stood there under the stream of water, just thinking about how my life was right now. I missed Niall, and Zayn and Louis scared me, but I guess Liam wasn't so bad. He seemed to be the only one who cared if I lived or died. I only knew that he was my support here, and I needed him if I wanted to survive and see my own home again someday.

I turned the water off and then grabbed the towel, drying myself off. I cursed myself for not asking for any other clothes before Liam left. I groaned as I wrapped the towel around my waist and then slowly opened the door, looking both ways down the hall before hurrying in the direction of the room I was being held in. I was almost to the door when I felt a hand on my shoulder and then I was being turned around and pressed against the wall. I froze in fear as I was face to face with Zayn.

"Damn." He said in a raspy voice as he eyed my chest up and down and licked his lips at the sight. "You have no idea how much I want you, beautiful." He said, and I whimpered as he lifted his hand and pressed his palm to my chest. He then began to slowly run his fingers against my chest, and I would be lying if I said I didn't get a bit aroused as he got closer to my v-line that was hidden by the towel around my waist. "Fuck." He whispered as his fingers reached the towel and then his lips were on my neck, sucking harshly on my tender skin there.

The pain was terrible, but I couldn't help but let out a moan as his lips found my sweet spot, and he began sucking his mark there. I felt myself harden slightly and felt Zayn's hand trail underneath the towel and his fingertips skimmed over my thighs. I have never experienced anything like this before and my breathing got faster. His lips left my neck and then his fingertips pressed on the dark mark I knew was now there. I winced and squeezed my eyes shut at the pain. "I wish I could make you feel good." He whispered while staring intensely into my eyes. I gulped at his words and began to look anywhere but at him, searching for an escape.

"Zayn!" I heard Louis' voice yell from another room. Zayn gave a sigh and then licked over the dark mark he left on the skin, his fingers leaving my thighs as he pushed himself away from me and said "Maybe some other time." He winked at me and the walked off and around the corner of the hallway. I left out a deep breath and then ran into the room I was staying in. I ran to the closet and opened it up, seeing clothes that all seemed to fit me hung up. I found a pair of dark grey sweats, a black t-shirt, and a pair of boxers to wear. I quickly dressed and then threw the towel to the corner of the room. 

I laid down on the bed and groaned as I pressed my fingers to the mark on my neck. Zayn definitely terrified me. The last thing I thought about as I felt my eyes get heavy and my vision turned to black was that I had to get out of here.


	3. Lustful Jealousy

I woke up to a soft knock on my door and then I heard it creaking open. The active part of my brain knew exactly who it was, but the half asleep part was still a bit dazed. Last night I was in a restless sleep, where I had nightmare after nightmare and no matter what I'd do they'd just return ten times worse. I knew it was probably due to my reality right now, but it seemed far worse than my reality.

"Good morning, Harry. Want breakfast?" I heard Liam's voice ask and I sat up in the bed. I rubbed my eyes until my vision was a lot clearer and nodded. He set the plate and glass down before he smiled at me. I watched, a bit confused as his smile faded and then he pressed his fingers to my neck and said "Who the hell did this to you?" I winced as he pressed down on my neck and that's when I remembered what Zayn had done to me last night. I was terrified and flustered when it had happened, and I just wanted an escape from it.

I shook my head, afraid to answer because I saw the rage that was held in Liam's eyes. "It was Zayn wasn't it?" He asked and my eyes widened in fear as he shot up and punched the wall. I flinched at the sound the wall made and shrunk back away from Liam as his breathing got heavier. "He has no fucking right to touch you." He said, and I was a bit scared and confused at the same time. Why was he acting like this? "Did he do anything else?" He asked, and I slowly shook my head. He really only gave me the hickey, not much of anything else, besides if I gave Liam details he might totally lose it and seeing a pissed of Liam was pretty scary considering how calm he usually is.

He sat back down in front of me and gave a few more deep breaths and then said "I'm sorry if I scared you." I looked at him with fear in my eyes, but I nodded. Liam sighed and then said "You should eat, Harry. And you need to tell me if Zayn does anything like this again. Promise me." He said.

"I promise." I gently whispered. Then Liam got up and ruffled my curls before walking out of the room, locking the door behind him. That was awfully weird? Why did he seem so mad and upset when he saw the mark Zayn left? Why should he even care? I decided not to think about it too much as my head began to spin. I grabbed the plate that had scrambled eggs and bacon on it and began to eat. I drank the glass of orange juice that Liam set on the floor and just thought about everything. The fact that I have been here for a day already bothered me as my time spent here was inevitable. I could be here for a very long time and I didn't like that idea.

I had just finished eating when I suddenly heard yelling coming from another room. I recognized the voices as Zayn and Liam and I listened intently to what they were saying. "Why the hell would you give him a hickey?" Liam asked and I didn't particularly like the rage in his voice. Then Zayn's voice took over, and he sounded a bit cocky. "He seemed to enjoy it." He said, and I scoffed at that. I mean, I only moaned because he was sucking on the most sensitive part of my neck.

"Zayn, I swear to God-"

"What, Liam? I get why you're mad. You want him all to yourself, but tough luck. You want him, you have to win him over." Zayn said, and my breath hitched. Did Liam really like me that way? He didn't seem like he did. He was just too friendly to seem that way. "He's not even yours." Liam said and that confirmed what Zayn had said.

"Not yet, Liam, but soon. I can't wait to ravish that perfect little body of his." Zayn said, and I cringed at his words. I didn't want to hear this, but then the voices got louder. "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I heard Liam yell and my eyes widened at how mad he sounded. He sounded like he was out for blood, and I didn't like it one bit. 

"OR WHAT? IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE A MOVE ON HIM ANYTIME SOON." Zayn shouted back and then I heard a thud, and I jumped at the sound. I heard some struggling, and I could only assume they were fighting. My thoughts were proven correct when I heard the sweet, angelic voice of Louis interrupt them. 

"What the hell is going on here? Get the fuck off of the floor. Zayn, go clean your damn face, your nose is bleeding. Liam, go check on Harry." When he said my name, I got little butterflies in my stomach, even though he's never even actually talked to me. I heard footsteps coming down the hall, and I assumed it was Liam when I heard him take a deep breath and then knock on the door before unlocking it and gently pushing it open. He gave me his signature smile and walked in.

"All done?" He asked politely, calmly, too, as if nothing had happened. I nodded and he walked over to collect the plate and the glass. "What happened?" I asked as I noticed the bruise forming on his cheek. I'm guessing Zayn punched him there, but Liam didn't say that. "Um, nothing. Don't worry about it." He said. He walked to the door and was about to walk out when he stopped me turned back to me. "Remember to tell me if Zayn tries anything again. Okay?" He questioned and I respond with a small okay of my own. He nodded and then walked out of the room.

I had no idea what was going on anymore. So now Zayn and Liam had a thing for me and I guess they had a sort of rivalry over it now. Why do they even like me? Why did Niall even like me? There's nothing much to like about me. People were always saying I was beautiful, or handsome, or even hot, but I never understood where they were coming from. I'm nothing special. I'm just an average boy with messy curls and dull, green eyes. Nothing special. Nothing special at all.

***************************

I walked over to the closet and pulled out a blue t-shirt and black skinny jeans before pulling my sweatpants down and changing into the skinnies. I then pulled my shirt off from last night and was going to pick up the blue t-shirt when the door suddenly opened. I froze as I saw Louis standing there. His eyes seemed to roam up and down my chest before they made contact with mine. I could feel my cheeks heat up, and I quickly pulled the t-shirt over my head.

"Seems like you got Zayn and Liam fighting each other." He commented and then he stepped inside and closed the door. I sank onto the bed as he walked over and stood infront of me. "What's so special about you that you are tearing my two best mates apart?" He questioned. He seemed to be glaring at me, but his eyes hid an emotion that I couldn't distinguish. He was really hard to read.

"I was just wondering the same thing." I whispered, but I knew he heard me when he raised his eyebrows in surprise. 

"Hmm. Follow me." He said and I didn't move a muscle as he walked back to the door and opened it. When it came to Louis, I didn't know what to do. I have never been so flustered just by looking at someone before, but he made me that way. I always just wanted to sink into the ground and disappear when he was around, yet I wanted to also be in his contact 24/7. He stopped at the door and turned back to me. "Coming?" He called expectantly, and I finally stood up. I hurriedly made my way beside him, and I saw that he was suppressing a smile.

He led the way out of the room and down the hallway. I had no idea where he was leading me, but I wanted to go because I was going with Louis. I have never really been interested in anybody, but I was very interested in Louis, even if he was a bit rude to me the first time we spoke. I already know I would follow him to the ends of the earth if he wanted me to, and that wasn't a good thing because I wanted to be free and go back home.

We walked into a room and I guess it was his, but I can't be certain. He pulled me by the arm and dragged me behind him until I was standing in front of the full length mirror he had in the corner of his room. He walked behind me and said "Let's see. Maybe it's those curls that get them." He said as he ran his hand through my hair. I tried so hard not to close my eyes and lean into his touch, and it was all I could do not to.

"Maybe it's those amazing green eyes. Those emerald colored eyes that can suck anybody into a daze." He said as he made eye contact with me through the mirror. I wanted to look away, but I was too caught up in his bright blue eyes to look anywhere else. I was caught in a trance, and I couldn't break free from it.

"Or maybe it's something else." He said, and I felt his hand run down my back until he reached the bottom of my t-shirt. His fingers slowly pulled it up and my hands flew up as he took it off and over my head, tossing it down on the floor. "Maybe it's this toned chest." He said as he pulled my back to his chest and ran his hand down my chest. His touch raised goose bumps on my skin, and I shivered a bit as Louis smirked.

"It could also be something a little lower." He said as his fingers skimmed over my waistband of my boxers which were showing a bit from the top of my pants. I suppressed my moan by biting my lip. Louis noticed and turned me around. "Maybe it's the way your lips just look so kissable." I literally froze as he pulled my lip out from between my teeth and slowly leaned in. And then he was kissing me slowly and it was so different from my kiss with Niall.

I felt my lips tingle a bit as he pressed his to mine, and I was filled with warmth all over me. He pushed me back until my back was against the wall. His fingers gently touched down my chest and abs until he came to my pants. His thumbs rubbed circles into my hips and then he broke his lips away from mine. His gaze traveled down to my neck and he frowned at the hickey Zayn left there.

"Who did this?" He asked and his tone of voice reminded me of Liam's except Louis's was ten times scarier. His voice gave me a chilly feeling, and I was petrified. 

"Um, Za-Zayn." I answered because his eyes seemed to demand that I answered him. It felt a bit weird to know that Louis hasn't even had a real conversation with me and here he was telling me that I had amazing eyes and a nice chest.

"Zayn?" He almost growled and I hesitated to nod, but his eyes gleamed with authority, so I nodded. He glared at the dark mark and then said "Did you enjoy it?" He asked as he pressed down on it, and I winced in pain. "Did you fucking enjoy his lips on you?" He asked between gritted teeth, and I quickly shook my head. He lowered his head for a second and then asked "Did it hurt?" I didn't want to answer, but then he asked again. "Did it hurt, Harry? Don't lie, either." I gave a small nod because Zayn sucked awfully hard when he gave it and it stung horribly. "I can fix it." Louis said, and I was about to ask what he meant when I felt his lips press to the opposite side of my neck. He gently sucked on my skin and this was so much better than what Zayn did.

I leaned my head back against the wall and gave Louis more access to my neck. I have no idea why I am acting this way because I should be pushing Louis away, but I just can't. I let out a soft moan as he gently gripped my hips and pulled me deeper into him. My whole body felt on fire, and I felt Louis smirk against my skin. Then, I heard a door opening and Liam's familiar voice yelled out "Louis, we're back!" Louis quickly threw himself off of me and looked at me with angry eyes.

I wanted to shrink back in fear and Louis's words rang through my head. "I will hurt you." He had said before and I didn't doubt him. "This never fucking happened." He said, and I gave a quick nod as he bent down, picked up my shirt, and threw it to me. I quickly slipped it on and then Louis opened his door, gesturing me to get out. I ran out of the door and all the way back to the room I was occupying. For some reason I felt tears building up behind my eyes. They began to burn as I tried my best to hold them back, but in the end a few slid down my face.

I have no idea what this attraction I felt to Louis was, but it had to go away. I didn't need to have feelings for a kidnapper. I didn't want to have feelings for him. I couldn't handle it. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to go back home. I wanted my life back. I would literally give anything just to be free and as far away from here as possible. I would give anything to be back home with Niall and just feel safe with him.

I heard footsteps approaching my room and I really didn't feel like talking to anybody, no matter who it was, so I closed my eyes and turned on my side, pretending I was asleep. My eyes squeezed shut as I heard that familiar soft knock on the door before it swung open. I knew Liam was in the room. He stepped closer to the bed and checked to see my eyes were closed. I felt his fingers gently caress my cheek, and I fought myself to stay rigid and keep my eyes closed, not matter how much I just wanted to jump up and scoot against the wall.

"I'm so sorry you have to be here, Harry." He whispered and then he moved my curls out of my eyes and I heard his footsteps retreating from the room. The door closed behind him, and I was once again all alone. My body shook as I let out all my tears. I hated being here. I hated being held here and not knowing what was going on outside. I missed Niall, I missed my parents, and I missed waking up in my own bed every morning. I hated being here. I knew I couldn't trust anybody, but it does seem like the only person I can try to get to know is Liam. He's the only person who hasn't really tried anything with me, but as I thought that up I replayed the moment I had with Louis. My tears fell harder as all of the confusion and anger built up in my mind.

My head was spinning at all of the thoughts and all of the pain I was going through. I curled in on myself and tried to calm myself down, breathing through my tears and squeezing my eyes shut. I hated this reality.

The last thought that went through my head before I was pulled into a deep sleep was the most depressing thought I've ever had. I wanted to die.


	4. Torture & Passion

   "Harry, get up, now." I heard a beautiful voice say and my eyes snapped open as my legs were thrown over the side of the bed and then I fell off and landed hard on my arm. "Ow!" I squeaked out. I finally opened my eyes and saw a pair of shoes in front of my face. "Get off the floor." I looked up and saw Louis standing there. Why was he being so rough? 

    "Hurry up!" He said as I picked myself up slowly from the ground. He sighed in impatience and gripped my arm, pulling me off the ground, and, although I didn't like it, I felt a course of electricity rush through me from his touch. I stood upright and he let go of my arm. "Follow me." He said, and I nodded as he turned around and led me out of the door. We walked down the hall and he stopped at a door at the far end of it. I looked back in the direction we came from, the exit had to be that way, but I couldn't run now, I couldn't, I had to wait.

   Louis opened the door and the room was dark. He grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room after him. There was a dim light in the room and I saw Liam and Zayn standing along the wall. "Sit." Louis said and I was pushed into the chair that was in the middle of the room. By now my heart was pounding because I didn't know what was going on and it didn't help that I was woken up in such a rushed way.

   "What am I doing here?" I asked Louis, but he just gave me a small smile that screamed wicked, but it gave me butterflies. I looked over to Zayn and Liam, waiting for an answer, but they were silent. "News is that your parents are back at home." Louis said and my breath caught at that. I had no idea what would happen now that they were back, but what Liam said to me before rang through my mind. "I'm not really supposed to say, but I'm thinking Louis is going to use this as a ransom. Get more money from your parents than we were originally going to steal." It was all about money.

    "So we were thinking of giving them a call." Louis then reached into his pocket and took out his phone and a piece of paper. "Home number wasn't really hard to find." He commented and then began to enter the number into his phone. He pressed speaker and then the ringing of his phone filled the silent room. My heart was beating so fast, and I didn't know what to expect.

   The voice that answered was a voice that made me long to go home even more. "Hello?" Niall answered in a worried voice. He was at my house? How long has he been there? "Hello?" Niall asked again, and I felt tears build up in my eyes at the sound of his voice. Louis gave me a pointed look and my voice cracked as I spoke. "Niall." I said and it was so faint, but Niall heard me, and he immediately responded.

    "Harry? Harry, are you okay? Harry, talk to me, please." He said and his voice was shaky. I can only imagine how scared he is about this whole thing. I opened my mouth to speak, but Louis spoke instead. "He's fine for now." He said and there was a cold chill to his voice. He sounded nothing like he did yesterday when he brought me to his room. This was a completely different Louis in front of me.

    "Who is this? Leave Harry alone!" Niall said, and I heard the rage and hurt in his voice. I felt even worse now for all of the times I hurt him because he cared so much for me, but I never gave him chance. I still don't see him as more than a friend, but hearing how upset he was hurt me deeply. "Harry will remain unharmed if his parents do as I say." Louis said. "So where is the lovely Styles couple?" Louis said and tears were finally rolling down my eyes. I missed my mum and dad so much. I wanted to see them again.

   "They're busy setting up a search for Harry. And we will find him." Niall said and it sounded like a promise. Louis smirked at that and said "You might, but he might not still be a part of this world." I noticed Zayn tense at that part and Liam seemed to look away, his eyes squeezing shut. 

    "DON'T YOU DARE HURT HIM! HARRY!" Niall screamed into the phone, and I began to cry harder. I tried snatching the phone from Louis, but he just moved his hand out of the way and motioned to some rope. Zayn slowly walked over to it and then came back to me, looking me in the eyes before tieing my hands behind my back. I cried desperately, I didn't want Niall to worry about me. He had enough problems in his life, he shouldn't have to worry about me.

    "Harry speak to me, please." Niall begged, but Louis shook his head at me, and I stayed silent. "Here's the deal. We get access to their bank accounts, we get the money, and then, and only then, will you get Harry back." Louis said and even though I was disgusted by his actions right now, I still thought he was the most beautiful person on the planet and that killed me on the inside. Why was I so fucked up?

   "Anne!" Niall yelled out and my heart was beating fast in anticipation of hearing my mum's voice. "What, Niall? Honey, what is it?" My mum asked and then I heard my dad's voice follow. "Anne, what's going on?" My sobs got louder, and I felt like I was choking on them. "Such a pleasure to speak with Harry's lovely parents." Louis spoke into the phone, and I heard my mum gasp as my dad's voice rang through.

   "What have you done to my son?" He demanded and Louis chuckled. "Nothing... yet." He said and then smiled. "We just want the money and then you can have Harry." He said. "How much money?" My mum asked and she sounded so scared and desperate to save me.

   "Don't give him anything!" I yelled and my mum's sobs could be heard.

     "Harry, it's the only way to save you." She breathed out, and I heard her sobbing harder. I remember once when I was about five years old how I felt so helpless when I was all alone with my mum and she fell down the stairs and broke her leg from the fall. I wanted to do anything I could to help her, but I was too young to actually be useful. I had felt hopeless then, and I could tell that's how she was feeling now. "We should have never left you alone." She said and that gutted me.

   "Don't blame yourselves. Any of you. It's okay. Just stay strong, mum and dad. Don't give them any money." I said. Then, I felt a sharp sting to my cheek and I was shocked when I realized Louis had slapped me. I heard my mum cry "My poor baby!" as I gave a startled yell and my dad yelled into the phone. "KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY SON!" He raged. 

   "I will, if you do as you were told. The decision is yours, but the longer you wait, the longer Harry may have to suffer."

   I heard my mum cry and I heard her run out of the room, my dad chasing after her, then Niall's voice was back. "Harry, please be okay." He struggled to speak and I nodded, even though he couldn't see me. "You have to be. I- I..." I knew what he was going to say, and it killed me that he still felt that way about me while I was here, having a despicable crush on my kidnapper who was tormenting my loved ones right now. "I love you, Harry." He finally said, and Louis seemed to glare into the phone as he said that. 

   "I know, Niall. I know." I whispered. It hurt that I just didn't love him in the same way, but I still said it back. "I love you, too, Ni." I cried, though he probably knew I meant only as a friend because I always said it that way. God, I wasn't even with him, and I was probably hurting him a lot. His saddened face whenever he got rejected burned in my mind, and I squeezed my eyes shut as a hot tear ran down my cheek. "I'm sorry, Niall." I said and he was going to say something else, but Louis hung up the phone and I lost it.

   "NO! NO, YOU CAN'T JUST DO THAT!" I yelled, and I struggled against the ropes on my wrists. I just wanted to hit Louis right now for how much pain I was in and how much misery I was feeling. 

    He bent down until he was eye level with me and whispered "Don't cry, love." My heart burned as he called me love, but then he smirked and added "It's not attractive." He then got up and left the room without saying another word. He was playing with my emotions and I hated it, but I liked him, a lot.

    Zayn was next to leave the room, and he gave me a small smile as he walked out. I couldn't even breath right now because I was so mad, and angry, and upset, and devastated, and so many more emotions that there were just too many words for.

   I felt my hands being untied and I was reminded that Liam was still present in the room. As soon as my hands were free, I pulled my knees to my chest and laid my head in my arms, allowing the tears to flow free. I didn't even care if Liam saw me being weak, and why should I? They already kidnapped me and are making me miserable day by day, so it's not like they actually care. It's not like I'm not going to feel broken inside after being taken away from everything I've ever known.

   "Harry, I'm so sorry. I wish I could help you." Liam said and that pissed me off. I jumped out of the chair and glared at him. He looked shocked as I began yelling at him.

   "What the hell do you mean, Liam? You could help me by letting me go, but I don't think you have the guts to betray Louis's directions do you? Don't say you wish you could help me when you very well know you can if you would only man up!" I yelled and then I stepped out of the room. I thought about going back to that room and just crying on the bed, but there was nobody in the hallway and my path was clear. I quickly and quietly ran to the end of the hall and was instantly standing in the living room, light shining through a window. I then saw the front door and didn't hesitate to rush towards it. My heart was beating and adrenaline was running through my body at a thousand miles per second.

   My hand wrapped around the door knob, but then I was pulled back painfully by my arm. I was whipped around and was face to face with a pissed off Louis. "Where do you think you're going, love?" He asked, and I gulped at how dark his voice sounded. The sane part of me was absolutely terrified of it, and I didn't like it, but the part of me that thought Louis was incredible was so turned on by his dark side.

   "Answer the question." He said as he squeezed my wrist tighter, and I winced a bit, but I didn't answer the question. "Were you trying to leave? Were you trying to run away from me?" He asked, and I felt his nails digging into my skin. I gave a small yelp of pain and then he was dragging me harshly by my arm down the hall again.

   He passed the room that I was staying in before and opened another door that was three doors down. He pushed me inside, and I couldn't see a thing. The room was completely dark. I began to breath faster because I've never been a big fan of the dark. I hated it. I didn't like what I couldn't see.

    I jumped as I felt a hand on my waist and my breath caught as I felt a surge of electricity run through me. I felt him pull me closer to him until my back was against his chest. His lips rubbed against my ear and he slowly whispered out "You can't leave, Harry. You're never gonna get away. I'm not gonna let you." He slowly licked the shell of my ear, and I shivered in his hold. I felt his lips go into a smirk and then he spun my around to face him.

My eyes slowly began adjusting to the dark and I could make out only some of Louis' features, but most of him still seemed like a shadow.

   He lifted my shirt up and pulled it off of me in one swift motion, before proceeding to take his off as well. My mouth fell agape a bit at how beautiful he was, but it quickly slammed shut as I was pushed against a wall and then Louis's lips were on mine. I tried to fight the urge to kiss back, but the temptation was too much.

   Louis smirked as he felt my response and then his tongue ran across my bottom lip, and I gasped in surprise. His tongue shot into my mouth, and I moaned as he licked leisurely around my mouth. His hips then jutted into mine and the friction was amazing. I couldn't concentrate on kissing back as Louis continuously grinded against me.

   "Fuck." Louis whispered as his lips left mine and he began to suck on my neck, giving me yet another dark mark on my skin. My mouth hung open as I tried to take in all the pleasure, but my mouth ran dry as Louis broke away from my skin and looked me in the eyes. "Let me make you feel good, Harry." He whispered, and I don't think it was a question, but I still nodded as he gave me a dark, sinister, yet beautiful, smile.


	5. Losing It

I didn't realize the bed in the room until Louis slowly walked me over to it. He pushed me down onto it as soon as I reached it and then climbed on top of me. His hands roamed my exposed chest while his eyes took in what they could. His hands felt amazing on me, and I felt like I was put under some kind of spell. 

He then scooted down until he was infront of my pants. His fingers unzipped and unbuttoned them before he pulled them off of my body with force. He stood up and pulled his pants and boxers off in one go, my cheeks heating up as his beautiful, naked body was exposed to my lustful eyes. Louis was dark and he was dangerous, he was also my kidnapper who brought me mental and physical pain, but he was so beautiful to me.

He climbed back on top of me and reached for my hand. I gasped as I felt my fingers being wrapped around his member. His eyes shut tightly at the feeling and once he collected himself enough to speak, he said "Pump me." My mouth was so dry, but I did what he requested because I just couldn't say no. I couldn't deny Louis.

I slowly began to pump him, squeezing his member slightly as I did, and he moaned deeply at the feeling as his head tipped back a bit. "Fuck, Harry." He breathed out and that turned me on so much more. My hard member was poking Louis's thigh, and I knew he felt it when he stopped my movements and lowered himself infront of my boxers. He trailed the outline of my package through my boxers with his index finger, and I moaned deeply as he did. I felt tingles run from my thighs all the way up my body. 

Louis wrapped his fingers around my boxers and then pulled them down so I was now exposed to the cold air and his hungry eyes. He threw my boxers onto the floor and wasted no time lowering his head and taking me into his precious mouth. I was in shock at the amazing sensation, but I was also trying to understand how this was all happening. One minutes I was pissed off at him and wanting to leave, but now I wanted to stay more than anything.

Louis's magical tounge flicked against my tip, and I fisted my hands in his hair from pleasure. I didn't mean to buck my hips up, but they bucked up involuntarily, forcing Louis to take me deeper into his mouth, and I screamed out at the ecstacy I was feeling. I suddenly blushed as I remembered that Liam and Zayn were still inside, and I bit my lip to hold in my screams as Louis deep throated me. He seemed displeased by this, and he pulled his mouth off of me.

"I want you to scream, Harry. I want you to scream my name." He said. I opened my mouth to talk, but then Louis bent back down and took me into his mouth again. I bit my lip until I felt blood as I also felt him dip lower and his tounge rimmed my hole. I fisted the sheets I was laying on, and I could feel my knuckles turn white.

"Scream, Harry." Louis said in a deep, threatening tone that turned me on so much. "Z-Zayn a-a-and L-Liam." I stuttered out from the pleasure Louis was giving me.

"Let them hear. Let them know you're mine." He said, and then I did scream as his finger pushed into me and he began to pump it in and out. It was raw and it was a bit rough, especially because this was my first time, but I would not tell him that. Louis smirked at my yell, and he began to suck another hickey onto my neck as he added a second finger, and I screamed out again. It was rough and rigid pain mixed with sweet and seductive pleasure, both intertwining to make something beautiful, yet sinful.

Louis added in another finger and I moaned as I was beginning to adjust to his fingers. Then, Louis pulled away from my neck and said "Perfect." He continued to pushed his fingers in me as he spoke to me in a deeply seductive voice. "Ever since I first saw you, I wanted to hear you moan. I wanted to make you helpless underneath me, and I'm not disappointed. You're so fucking sexy that I just want to fuck you everytime I see you. Even Zayn couldn't keep his hands off of you, but he'll have to learn how because I don't share. I will be the only name you'll ever scream, and I will never let you go. I'm going to fuck you deep and hard until you can't cum anymore." He said and then he pulled his fingers out, and I was only left empty for a split second before he thrusted into me.

I yelled out in pain and pleasure combined together, and my nails ran down Louis' back, to which he moaned in response. He thrusted into me hard and he went deep, just like he said he would. I was a complete mess under him and completely at his mercy. He changed his angle up a bit and thrusted right into my prostate, hard.

Another scream left my lips and Louis smirked. "I love watching you at my mercy. And I can tell you've never been fucked before from how goddamn tight you are. I don't understand how when you're so damn hot, but all I know is that I want to be the only one to fuck you, the only one to make you feel this way. I don't want anyone else to touch you but me." He said and then he wrapped his hand around my throbbing member. I thrusted my hips up to get that amazing friction his hand was offering me and Louis gazed at me with intense eyes.

"I could just stay in this position and you would just thrust up, pulling me into you, and moving yourself into my hand, you'd be begging for it while basically fucking yourself. You're such a little slut. My little slut." He said and he placed rough kisses along my jaw as I continued to thrust into his hand and he continued to thrust into me. The pleasure was all too much and I couldn't take it anymore. I screamed out as Louis thrusted hard into me again, hitting my prostate, and I came undone.

I could tell that Louis was far from finished as he still had so much energy to go off of. I was panting from my high state, but Louis was determined to continue. He pulled out of me, and I groaned at the feeling on being empty. He then lowered himself and licked up the cum that was on my stomach as well as on his hand, then he took me into his mouth again and I began to grow hard all over again. He was just so seductive and he knew how to turn me on.

He ran his hand up the inside of my thigh, and I needed to feel Louis inside of me again. "Please, Louis. I need you." I begged and he smirked up at me. "You're so needy, Harry." Then he bent my legs over his shoulders before ramming into me, and I screamed out in pleasure. "So very needy." He said. He burrowed himself deep inside of me and I bit my lip, almost causing it to bleed again.

"Harry, what did I say about screaming?" He questioned and to prove that be wanted me to, he thrusted extra hard into me, and my lips fell open into a yell. He smirked again and then continued to thrust into me with all he had. I arched my back, my head rubbing against the pillow, in total pleasure. It was so good, and I never imagined that anything could feel so good in my life. I was missing out on so much as I was containing my virginity. Or maybe it was just because Louis was good at what he was doing. It seemed he was good at anything he did.

"Fuck!" Louis yelled out as he finally came, spilling deep inside of me, and I felt the warmth fill me up. He thrusted into me a few more times and then pulled out, sliding down my legs and flicking out his tounge to lightly lick my boner. I made a weird some that was something between a whimper and a moan and Louis chuckled. "Desperate much?" He asked and I lost all of my breath as he took me into his mouth with no warning.

It only took him a few sucks before I was cumming into his mouth and screaming his name. Louis swallowed all of me before pulling off and crawling back onto my body, kissing my lips roughly, and then whispering one word into my ear. "Perfect.


	6. Help Me

I was so confused. I was back in the room I was staying in and I was lieing down, full of thoughts on what went down between me and Louis. Images of him sucking me off and pealing the clothes off of my body filled my mind. I was pissed at myself, but I was also full of a sort of lust for him. I wanted- needed- more of him. I've only had him once, yet he was becoming an addiction to me. I desperately wanted more of him. His voice rang out in my mind and I shuttered at them.

"Let them hear. Let them know you're mine." Then another wave of words. "Even Zayn couldn't keep his hands off of you, but he'll have to learn how because I don't share." He doesn't like to share? That seemed likely enough, but I have a feeling that Zayn doesn't either. "I don't want anyone else to touch you but me." I could feel myself getting hard and I knew I should just shut it all out of my brain, but it was hard for me to do.

As more imaged and more of his dirty words rang around in my head, I couldn't take it anymore. I shakily unbuttoned my jeans and unzipped them before spitting on my hand, to act as a lubricant, and then putting my hand down my boxers. I gave a soft gasp as I squeezed myself, thoughts of Louis's lips wrapping around me filling my mind.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I ran my thumb over my tip, imagining when Louis's tongue flicked out to touch it. I remembered when his hand was the one wrapped around me and I desperately began to pull and tug of my member, trying to even get half the satisfaction Louis gave me. How the hell did he make it feel so good?

I released pants and moans as I felt myself getting nearer and I felt the sweat dripping from my forehead in anticipation. I was so into it, so close to my release, that I didn't hear the door open unexpectedly. I came at that moment. I shot into my hand and boxers and gave a pleasured moan from it, biting my lip to keep from screaming. I didn't need the three of them to know what I was doing in here. 

I released myself, pulling my hand out of my boxers, before sitting up in bed. My original plan was to change out of these clothes, but I froze as I saw Zayn standing in the doorway. His eyes were dark with lust and he was biting his lip. Oh fuck, I'm screwed.

A dark smile filled his face as he closed the door behind him and walked closer to where I was on the bed. I stood up and fell backwards in surprise to how close he was to me already. I stumbled over my own to feet as I tried to get away from him, but he was pretty determined and soon he had my pinned to a wall, his hands holding me against it by my wrists.

He smiled at me and said "That was fucking hot." He pressed a kiss to my jaw and I tried to squirm out of his hold, but he had a tight grip on me. "Listen Harry," He began and he was looking deep into my eyes as he spoke. "I'm willing to forgive the fact that you gave yourself to Louis if you give me something in return?" Was he crazy? I would never do anything for him.

"You tied my hands up." I reminded him of today's earlier events and he smirked. "And Louis slapped you today. My guess is you like it rough." He leaned in and whispered in my ear. "Do you want me to be rough with you, Harry?" He asked, and I quickly shook my head. I'm not going to lie, Zayn was really hot, but I only wanted Louis- even if he was a dominant, crazed, psycho kidnapper who was using me as ransom for my parents money. It was sick, it was twisted, but I had such a strong, attractive pull to Louis.

"You like playing games don't you?" He questioned and I shook my head again. He shot daggers at me with his eyes and I shrank back into the wall a bit. "Harry, are you okay?" Liam asked as he walked into the room. He saw Zayn and his expression hardened.

His stare went back to my face and I sent him a pleading look to help me. "Zayn, leave him alone." He said in an angry tone. It was nothing worse than Louis', but it was scary for Liam. "Why the hell do I always get interrupted?" He mumbled, then he sent me a wink and said "We'll continue this some other time." He pushed away from me and left the room, leaving me in fear. "You alright?" Liam asked and I nodded. He awkwardly scratched his neck and asked "He didn't, um, force you. Did he?" I was a bit confused but blushed and looked down at the floor when he said "I mean Louis."

I felt so awkward and stupid. Liam would sure think of me as stupid for giving myself to Louis that way when he just hurt me. God, I was stupid, but I didn't regret it, and that made me feel worse. "You heard that?" I sheepishly asked, a bit of shame in my voice.

"You weren't exactly quiet." He said and that made my throat dry all of a sudden. God, this was so embarrassing. "Look, it doesn't matter to me, but I just want to know if it was forced." He said.

"Um, n-no. It wasn't forced." I said. Can I die now? 

Liam blushed a bit and then said "O-okay. That's all I needed to know. You should probably go to bed now." He then slipped out of the door and I jumped as I heard a loud crash like he broke something or punched a wall too hard. I sighed and changed my clothes and cleaned myself before lieing down.

I lied there, staring at the ceiling. It seems to be all I do most of the night, but this time was different. Usually my daydreaming time was full of the longing to return home, but now it was full of visions of Louis on top of me. Just how screwed up can I be?

***************************

I woke up from a nightmare. Well, I don't know what it was. There was a dark shadow that followed me everywhere, hovered over me, suffocated me, but I never wanted it to go away. I feared it, yet welcomed its company. It was strange and twisted, but I felt okay with it.

I got up and dressed into some different clothing, of course I was limited and only had a few outfits left. I was honestly grateful for the fact that they gave me any clothing at all. As soon as I was finished changing, the door to my room flew open. I turned around and saw Liam standing there with a plate of food and a glass of water in his hand.

He walked into the room and set the things down, then he turned and began to walk away. This was different. Usually he'd have a conversation with me, so why was he acting this way? He was probably really upset and disguisted in me because of last night. I didn't blame him. I was disguisted in myself. I know I shouldn't have given myself to Louis, but I was just so hypnotized by him. The worse thing is that I want to do it again.

"Liam?" I questioned and he slowly turned to look at me with an expectant expression. "Um, Are you okay?" I sheepishly asked. I didn't even know if I would get an answer, but I did.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" He said and I just shrugged. I didn't really know what to say, but I just wanted him to speak to me again. He was sort of the only one who ever had my back, and I'm basically a regular prisoner without him. Maybe he was also a little upset because I yelled at him yesterday and told him to man up. Man, I had to watch what I said sometimes.

"I don't know. Thanks for the food." I said and he nodded before walking out of the door. It surprised me when I didn't hear the sound of the lock that I always did. I waited a bit while longer, but it never came. I stood.up from the bed and cautiously walked to the door.

I put my hand on the door handle and slowly turned it. I pulled the door and peaked my head out into the hall. I walked out into the hall and looked both ways to see if anyone was coming. Once I knew the coast was clear, I walked to where I knew the living room and front door was. Once I got to the end of the hall, I looked around the corner to check if the living room was occupied, but nobody was there.

I quickly dashed to the front door and my heart was beating fast as I turned the handle and pulled the door open. I got it open and got a quick breath of the fresh air, but it was cut short as I saw Zayn and Louis step in front of me.

"What the hell!?" Louis asked in rage and then he grabbed me by my arm and pulled me into the living room. Zayn followed and closed the front door. "LIAM!" Louis called out and I knew Liam was in for it. I remembered what I told him yesterday. "You could help me by letting me go, but I don't think you have the guts to betray Louis's directions do you?" He was trying to help me. He left the door unlocked so that I could escape.

Liam entered the room and I saw his eyes flash with fear, before he set a calm expression on his face. "Yes?" He asked, as if nothing was going on, but Louis didn't respond so nicely.

"What the hell is this? We leave for thirty minutes and we come back home to see Harry at the front door! What the hell were you thinking? He could've escaped and it would've been on your ass! Did you even fucking lock the door when you left his room? You don't know how lucky you are that I don't go over there right now and rip your fucking-"

"He did lock the door." I said, and everyone's eyes turned to me. Louis's grip on my arm tightened.

"What?" He asked. I sighed. I didn't want Liam to get in trouble for trying to help me out. He was the only one who had my back. The only one who had an actual heart.

"He locked the door, but I picked the lock." I said and this made Louis angry.

"How the hell did you pick the lock?" He asked and I thought quickly.

"I used the fork from my food plate. It wasn't exactly hard." I said and he scoffed. He turned to Liam and said "Take him to his room and wait in there until he finishes his meal. Make sure he has nothing to pick a lock with. If he leaves, so does our fortune." He said and then shoved me towards Liam.

He caught my arm and kept me steady. He then dragged me down the hall and I saw Louis getting ready to flip his shit, his hands on his head, as we disappeared around the corner.

Liam spoke once we were in the room. "Thanks for lieing for me. But, um, why did you?" He asked ans I sat down to eat the food as I responded. "You helped me, so I helped you. I'm sorry for what I said yesterday. I know you don't exactly want to do this, but you have to. Thanks for trying to let me escape though." He nodded and then sat next to me on the bed. I wasn't even hungry anymore. Not after what happened.

"Now you see that I do care, Harry? I will be here for you and try to help you as best I can." He said and I nodded. I knew he meant every word he said. "Good. I'll take this now." He said and he picked up the plate and glass before walking towards the door. Right before he left, I called out "Thanks, Liam." He smiled and then shut the door. There was the familiar click of the lock turning and trapping me in a room with no windows and nothing to do but wait.


	7. Punishment

     I was staring at the ceiling again and counting the cracks on the roof when the door swung open and in walked Louis. I quickly sat up and backed up to the top of the bed. I knew he was pissed at me for trying to escape, and he was always scary when he was angry.

  He smirked at me and then shut the door behind him. He walked over to me and began speaking. "Why did you try to leave again, Harry?" He asked as he finally reached me. He sat on the bed beside me and I wanted to cringe away and scoot closer to him at the same time. Why did Louis make me feel this way all the damn time? "I thought I told you that you can't leave last night. Maybe you need a reminder of what we did last night." He said and my stomach coiled in arousal.

  He reached his hand out and touched my cheek with his fingertips. I blinked and when I opened my eyes again, Louis was right in front of me. His eyes were so beautiful and they became a shade darker as he began to get aroused. In one quick motions he leaned in and kissed me harshly. I kissed him back and he smirked into the kiss.

   "I love how you respond right away." He said and then he lifted me onto his lap before turning us around and laying me down on the bed. He immediately pulled my shirt over my head and then pressed rushed kisses all over my chest. Every kiss left a burning feeling on my skin and it was such a sensational feeling. This was what I have been craving since last night and I was desperate for it.

   He looked at my neck and said "Good." I guess he was referring to the fact that there were no new hickeys there. I wonder what he would've done if he walked in on Zayn and I last night instead of Liam. All thoughts flew out of my mind as Louis pulled my pants off, leaving me only in my boxers. I was already so hard and ready for Louis to take me. Louis pulled his shirt and pants off as well, but he also removed his boxers, so I was the only one with clothing on.

   He climbed on top of me and grabbed my hands, pinning them onto the bed as he pressed kisses to my neck. I closed my eyes at the feeling and leaned my head back to give him better access. He kissed over my soft spot and my breath hitched for a second. He then sucked down on it, and I let out a light moan.

   I loved the feeling of his lips on my skin. It made me feel a sort of fiery desire that I never wanted to go away. I gasped and moaned loudly as he began to grind our members together. I knew he was getting a bit more friction from the fact that he was bare and I was still constricted from my boxers. "Please, Louis." I whined and he looked down at me as he grinded down harder and faster. I groaned and moaned at the tingles that ran throughout my legs and abdomen, but listened to what he said.

   "You want me inside you again, Harry? Want me to make you feel good like I did last night? Want me to turn you into the submissive little slut I know you are?" He asked and I quickly nodded as he released one of my hands. He slowly slid his fingers into my boxers and gently rubbed the areas next to my sensitive member, giving me some sort of pleasure, but not what I really needed. 

   "Are you going to try to escape again?" He questioned and I shook my head. "I don't believe you." He said as he wrapped his fingers around my throbbing erection and slowly pumped me. I whimpered at the slight friction and he seemed amused by my reaction. I lifted my hips up to get more friction and felt electricity running through me. Everything felt so good, but I wanted Louis inside of me. I was craving it so much.

  "Lou- Louis, I need you. I need you." I begged and he knew how desperate I was, but he decided to tease me. "I don't know. You have been a very bad boy. You tried to leave, Harry. Do you really deserve it?" He asked and I whined.

   "Please. Please, Louis. I won't try to leave again. Please." I was sounding like a little whiny bitch, but I wanted this. I wanted to feel Louis inside me, filling me up to the brim and giving me all he had. I needed him to make me feel the rush and intense pleasures that he made me feel last night. I can't explain it, but I craved his touch and everything else about him.

   "Never expected you to be so needy, Harry." Louis teased, but then I yelped as his finger found my hole and pressed into it. I groaned and Louis seemed to enjoy the sounds that flew out of my mouth. I began panting as he pushed it in and out of me. Soon, he added a second finger and I was desperate for him.

   "Just fuck me, Louis." I moaned out and he groaned at the words leaving my mouth. "Shit." He whispered and then he was pulling off my boxers in one swift motion. He kissed me again and swallowed all of my moans and whimpers as he pushed into me. I felt myself stretch out, but it felt so amazing. 

   I clawed at his back as he began thrusting in and out of me. I felt the familiar surge of pleasure fill me up, but I still wanted more of Louis. I never wanted this moment to end, but I knew it would. It's best to enjoy it while it lasts.

   "You're so fucking tight. I still can't believe nobody has fucked you before me." He said as he moved to trail kisses down my neck and onto my shoulders. I leaned my head back onto the sheets to give him as much access as possible and my fingers roamed through his soft, feathery hair. "Nobody has touched you and that makes you so innocent. I love to ruin that innocence." He said as he began to thrust faster.

   I lost myself in moans as he gave me all I've been craving from him. True, I was still sore from last night, but I dealt with it because this felt so amazing. I watched Louis as he took in the pleasure of being inside of me. He was so beautiful. Even though he did bad things I still couldn't help but think of him as an incredible human being.

   He wrapped my legs around his waist and held my hands down again as he pushed into me roughly. He attached our lips together in a heated kiss and I lost myself in Louis. All of my senses were surrounded by him and he was all I could even think about. It was hard to comprehend how good he was making me feel right now, but he was doing it. I felt his tongue slide into my mouth and I immediately gave him dominance, willing him to do what he pleased.

   "Fuck. You're so willing." He said as he began trailing hot kisses down my chest. He thrusted into me deeper and hit my prostate everytime. I bit my lip and Louis chuckled. "You never learn do you? You can scream, babe. Liam and Zayn left for the night. I want you all to myself. I want you all night long." He whispered and then gave a harsh thrust that made my lips part into a desirable scream.

   Louis smirked at that and continued to thrust in and out of me with his hard, quick pace. I was a mess. We were both sweating and looking at his glistening body turned me on even more. I felt myself start to shake because I was trying to hold in my release, but I knew I couldn't hold back for long.

   "Cum for me." He whispered and I shot out my cum on our stomachs as I yelled out Louis's name multiple times. He groaned and said "Shit. Shit. Shit." as he too shot out and into me. I whimpered as he pulled out, but then he licked the cum off of my stomach slowly, giving long and leisurely licks, which only turned me on again. God, Louis made everything feel amazing.

   He licked his lips once he was done and then gave me a bruising kiss to my lips. I gave a small whimper because I felt myself growing hard again and I instantly wanted more of Louis. He seemed to notice as he gave a lovely sigh. "You're just so responsive, Harry. So much fun." He said and then he got up from the bed. I was a bit disappointed and thought he was going to walk away and leave me here to work out my own problem, but then he held his hand out and said "Shower."

   I nodded and took his hand as he pulled me along after him. We stepped out into the hall and made our way into the restroom. I didn't think of trying to escape even once and I don't know if that should worry me. My thoughts were cut off as Louis pushed me up against the door and we began a heated snogging session.

  I felt his fingers trail down my spine and once he reached my hole, he circled his finger around it, teasing me when I was so turned on and vulnerable to him. I began to breath heavy, and Louis pulled away. He smirked at me and then turned the shower on. He walked back over to me and pulled me into the shower, roughly pushing me against the wall.

   He kissed me on my lips, biting at my bottom lip so that his tongue could slip into my mouth. He took full control of the kiss, me not putting up a fight because Louis was just so addictive to me. He then lifted me up, my legs wrapping around his waist. My head fell back against the wall as he entered me in a harsh thrust. He trailed kisses down my neck and I closed my eyes, seeing nothing but white light and flashes of red from all of the pleasurable feelings.

   "Lou." I moaned out and that edged him on more. He thrusted into me without a care in the world, and I was in my own little, twisted heaven. Nothing on Earth could feel this good. It just wasn't possible. The warm water complimented every burning sensation that I felt from Louis trailing his fingers all over my body.

   Louis then took my hardened member into his hand and began to pump me in time with his rough thrusts. I gasped and my breathing grew heavier, it was all so much. I didn't even get this way when I pumped myself. It seemed like Louis' touch was magic and I was curious as to how he did it.

   "You're so fucking tight, Harry. I just love it." He growled into my ear before he attached his lips to the sweet spot below it and harshly sucked down on it. It hurt a bit, but the pleasure won out the pain. I couldn't handle the sensation of Louis sucking on my skin, pumping me in his hand, and thrusting into me with all he had. My breath hitched and I came into Louis' hand and onto his chest in hot white bursts. I screamed out his name and it echoed off of the bathroom walls.

   Louis shot his own cum deep within me, and I whimpered a bit as he pulled out. "Good boy." He said. He set me down and he pulled me into a deep kiss that was completely unexpected. Nonetheless, I kissed back immediately. 

   This kiss felt a bit different than all of the others, but it also felt dangerous. I already knew I had some type of twisted attraction to Louis, but I didn't really know what to refer to it as. This kiss made my head spin, but it also made me want to cry. I knew during that moment, that no matter how hard I would try to leave, a part of me would still want to stay.

***************************

    I was lying down on the bed in my prison. This horrible room with no windows. There was half of me that wanted to stay here and just sleep, but another part of me wanted to escape. Sadly, if that part did escape it would want to immediately find Louis.

   I have no idea why I am thinking this way. Maybe you get close to the person you lose you your virginity to? Maybe I'm just plain stupid? Maybe I like the excitement this brings? Maybe I am using him to replace the emptiness I feel inside? Maybe I've been such a long time without someone wanting me. The last person like that was Niall, but he was my best friend. I mean, there was Zayn, but he creeped me out when he tried anything. Why did I feel this way about Louis then?

   It was 3:15 in the morning, at least that's what the clock read. I groaned and buried my face in a pillow, this was too much to think about so early. I wanted to just turn off my thoughts and go to sleep, but I couldn't just let go of everything. I just wanted to go home and forget all of this.

   I froze as I heard the door click, signaling that it was unlocked. I waited, lying down perfectly still, but nobody ever entered the room. I don't even know if Zayn and Liam have come back, so it must've been Louis who unlocked the door. Why would he just leave it open?

   He wants to test me. I remember how pissed he got when Liam left it unlocked, and I almost left the room. This must be a test to see if I would really stay or not. Sadly, I would stay. I don't even know why. There was just something about Louis that made me want to stay. I can't even describe it.

  I mean, he hit me. He hit me, yet I was willing to stay with him. I knew my mum and dad would find a way to get me out of this, but a part of me dreaded that fact.

   I stood up and made my way to the door. I put my ear against it, listening for any footsteps or anything because eventhough I wasn't going to try and escape, I still didn't want to get in trouble for leaving the room.

   Once I determined that nobody was on the hall, I cracked open the door, which was thankfully silent, and then opened it up all the way. I walked out into the hallway, the stinging pain in my arsehole and legs being a reminder of Louis.

  I made my way through the hallway and found myself in the living room. I turned around another corner and came into the kitchen. I went over tot he cabinets and opened one, it was full of bowls and plates. I went to another cabinet and opened that one up. This one had pots and pans inside of it. I was going to look in the next cabinet, but froze when the kitchen light was turned on all of a sudden. "Thought you'd leave the room. You just don't listen do you?" I looked over to see Louis leaning against the wall of the kitchen entrance.

   I dropped my arms to my side and looked at the floor. I don't know why I feel like I just got caught doing something so wrong when all I wanted was a drink. "I, um, I just wanted a glass of water." I said in a barely audible voice.

   Louis smirked and then walked over to me. I fell back against the corner at how close he was to my face. His smirk never left his face as he leaned into me, his eyes searching mine before looking down at my lips. I let out a silent sigh as he smirked again and then pulled away, showing me the glass he now held in his hand.

   "Last cabinet on the left." He informed me, and I nodded, reaching out for the glass in his hand. I pouted a bit when he pulled it away from my reach.

   "You know, Harry, you are quite interesting." He said as he got close to my face again.

  "Why? I didn't do anything."

  "Exactly! I unlocked the door for you so early in the morning and all you did was come get a glass of water. That's what interests me. Why didn't you try and escape?" He asked while looking into my eyes.

   I was silent for a while before I finally answered. "I- you told me not to." I said in a whisper.

  I watched as Louis smiled, it wasn't his usual smirk that was full of cockiness and his know-it-all perception, but it was full of joy. Joy for what though?

  "Really? You didn't try to leave because of me?" He asked.

   "Yes." I replied, feeling a bit scared about what he would do next, or if he would even believe what I just said.

   He didn't say anything after that, he just leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. My eyes widened a bit at the surprising action, but pretty soon Louis' tongue was tracing my bottom lip, so I opened up my mouth and let him in.

    The kiss only lasted a few seconds, but it felt like a lifetime to me. Louis pulled back and said "Glad you're learning." He then handed me the cup and turned, walking away without another comment. I expected him to stay and make sure I wasn't going to leave, but he just walked away.

   I stood there for a moment, thinking of why he would let his guard down. Maybe he finally trusts me? If he does, this stay probably wouldn't be so bad. I filled the cup up with water and then went back to the room I was supposed to be in, eventhough my body craved to be by Louis. I took a few sips of water before setting it down and finally lying down to sleep.

   As I shut my eyes, one final thought of emotion filled me. Hope.


	8. Toxic Feelings

"Wake up, Harry." I heard Louis say. I slowly opened my eyes up and groaned a bit, still feeling tired. I also felt very sore from the activities of the night before. I only lost my virginity on that first night, and I never knew what horrible aftermath doing it more than once would cause.

"C'mon. The lads and I are leaving." He said. That caught my attention. I looked up at him, still in awe at how beautiful he was. I still cannot believe he's real at times.

"Is anyone staying with me?" I asked and he smirked down at me before leaning in and kissing me roughly, regardless of my morning breath.

"God, you sound sexy in the morning, babe." He growled when he pulled away. I felt my face heat up, but I tried to ignore these feelings I was getting for him. He was my kidnapper! "But no. Nobody is staying with you, but I do expect you to stay put until we return. If you do, you might get a chance to talk to your dear family." He said and my heart pounded at that news.

"Okay." I whispered. "How long will you be gone?" I asked.

He shrugged and said "Couple hours. We will be leaving in about fifteen minutes. Promise to stay?" He asked, and I quickly nodded my head. I felt like a trained puppy. He told me what to do, and I obeyed. Simple.

"Good." He said before he began walking to the door. "Oh, and even if you try to escape I promise you won't get very far. And I always keep my promises." He smirked. I believed him. I didn't even know where I was at. From that one quick glimpse I got of the outside, there looked like nothing but dirt roads. It was a bit freaky.

As soon as I was all alone in the room, I got dressed as quickly as I could and ruffled mg hair out a bit. I heard knocking on my door and knew who it was. The only person who ever knocks, eventhough the door is locked, but it does let me know who it is. Liam unlocked the door and stepped in, offering me a kind smile.

Ever since Liam left the door unlocked, allowing me to escape until I got caught, we've been a bit closer. I felt like he was the rock that I needed while being here. Sure, I was very into Louis, heaven knows why, but Liam was the one who had my back.

"Louis says he trusts you enough to leave this door unlocked." He announced and I was a bit shocked at that news. He trusted me this much?

Liam then leaned into the room more and spoke in a whisper. "Don't try to leave. Louis will know. Trust me when I say he'll know. I just want you safe, Harry." He said and I nodded, looking at him straight in the eyes. "Okay, good." He said. "Thanks, Liam." I said. He smiled again before walking out of the room, leaving the door unlocked like he said it would be.

I walked out of the room and made my way into the living room, feeling a bit free now. I wasn't just holed up in a little room with no windows anymore and it felt amazing.

I heard the sound of a car engine start up before it became fainter as it gained distance. I made my way over to the window and looked out of it. I have no idea where I was. I wish my emotions weren't as conflicted as they were. A huge part of me craved home. I wanted to run out of the door right now and leave, but there was a half of me that was growing that craved Louis. It was like wherever he was, I wanted to be. Even now, I wished he was here and I was with him. This isn't healthy.

I groaned in frustration, looking over at the door. I took a deep breath and went to the door, gripping the door knob and turning it. I pulled it open and felt relieved as fresh air blew over my face, the air was a bit stingy from how cold it was, but I quite enjoyed the cold weather.

I stepped out a little onto the steps and closed my eyes, smiling as the air blew over my face. The freedom the outside offered was so tempting, but I remembered Liam's words. "Don't try to leave. Louis will know. Trust me when I say he'll know." I had to trust Liam. He tried helping me and he was the only one I was truly close to, Louis is a whole other story, and Zayn kind of creeps me out, though I have to admit he is attractive.

I sighed and saw my breath puff out like white smoke in the winter air. I looked at the ground and frowned a bit, being so used to snowed over grass and concrete back at home. Eventhough I couldn't leave, I had faith that my family would find me. I just hope they don't pay the money because I'm not worth all of that. Or maybe it's because it gave me a reason to stay here longer. To stay here with Louis.

\----------------------------------------------

LOUIS (Time to look into his mind)

I needed to know if I could honestly trust Harry. He says that he wouldn't leave, but I had to make sure. If he did leave, it could jeopardize the whole money scheme. "Plus you don't want him to leave." I shook my head at the little voice in my head. It has been bothering ever since I saw Harry for the first time.

I instantly thought he was beautiful, and I wanted him to be mine, but let's face it- I'm his kidnapper. He would have to be completely out of his mind to like me back, yet I had hope. The way he acted around me gave me such hope that he could be mine. To be honest, he was sort of side-tracking me from the real reason of this whole kidnapping. This was ransom- nothing more, nothing less.

I decided to leave Harry 'home alone' for about an hour or so when really I would be hiding out, watching in case he left. Liam, Zayn, and I drove the car out a bit before making a u-turn and parking across from where the building is. There were several bushed to hide the car and ourselves behind, so that's where we settled.

"You honestly think he won't try to leave?" Zayn asked, he was completely skeptical about this. "Anybody in their right sense would try."

"He could have left last night, but he didn't. Let's just see." I snapped. He was really pissing me off lately. He's been acting all moody since the first time Harry, and I had sex. I knew Zayn wanted him, Liam as well, but I was determined to have him to myself.

That night was simply amazing. Harry seemed to want it just as badly, and I could tell he was a virgin from how tight he was, but he didn't seem to regret it. That also gave me hope that we could work things out. It was completely ridiculous, but I felt like I needed him. Not just because of how hot he looked underneath me as he moaned my name, but because I felt a weird connection to this boy.

When he said he didn't try to leave because of me last night, it made my heart flutter in happiness. Still, I can't tell anybody of these feelings. I haven't even truly accepted them myself.

I was snapped out of my thoughts at the fact that the front door to the house opened and Harry stood in the doorway. He lied! My first instinct was to automatically yell out to him and catch him before he tried to run away. I didn't want him to leave! No, he couldn't leave because of the ransom money.

I was about to get up from my spot, but Liam grabbed my arm and pulled me down to the floor. "What the hell, Liam? Do you want him to run away!? If he does that is a lot of money gone!" I yelled at him. My heart felt like it was beating out of my chest. Harry couldn't leave. Not so soon anyway.

Liam spoke in a calm voice. "He's not running, Louis. Look at him." He said. I sighed and turned back to look at Harry. Liam was telling the truth. He wasn't running for his life. He was just standing there in the doorway, looking at the scenery. I admired him as he closed his eyes and a small smile plastered on his face. He was amazingly beautiful.

He puffed out a breath of air and watched it as it looked like smoke. I found myself remembering a time when I did that. It's been a while since I've just enjoyed the world around me. My childhood wasn't always the best. I never got time to just be a child, so I admired that Harry had that quality about him. The quality to just enjoy life.

He looked down at the floor and his face fell into a frown. I instantly wanted to know what crossed his mind. I wanted to know what made him upset. I've never cared about anyone else's feelings, so this was a whole new experience to me. Wanting to know why he was upset.

He looked out into the distance again and then seemed to sigh before walking back inside the house. Still, I was confused on why he didn't try to leave?

I turned to Zayn and Liam and they both looked a bit shocked at Harry's decision to stay, as well. "What the...." Zayn trailed off. He looked between the house and me, eyes full of confusion. "Why didn't he leave?" He asked after a while. I could only shrug, unsure of why myself.

"Isn't it obvious?" Liam asked. We both turned to look at him and I was utterly confused still. What did Liam know that we didn't?

"If it was so obvious, Liam, I think we would have figured it out by now." Zayn said in a bit of a rude tone. His pissy mood was really getting on my nerves.

Liam sighed and said "He didn't leave because you told him not to." He pointed to me. What? That couldn't be true. I mean, that's why he didn't leave last night, but this was a clear shot for him to leave. At least from his prospective it was. Any person would have made a run for it.

"It's true, Louis. You seem to have him wrapped around your finger." Liam said. "He might even have actual feelings for you." He added. This was all so mind blowing for me. If Harry had feelings for me, I wouldn't know what to do. Should I push him away? He is our hostage after all. Should I pull him closer? My head felt like it was swimming.

We sat there for a while, just thinking everything through. None of us spoke, we just sat and thought. I don't know what ran through their minds, but mine was like a jumble of 'what ifs'. Trying to determine what I should do from now on.

Finally, we all got back into the car and drove back to the house. We parked in the parking lot, and I made my way into the house ahead of Liam and Zayn. Harry was sleeping on the couch, and I couldn't help but feel a weird fondness over the boy. His eyes were shut gently, his eyelashes coating over his eyelids in a thick frame. His lips were slightly parted as small breaths left his mouth. His lips were so pink and they were a nice contrast to his pale skin. They looked so, so kissable.

I walked over to the couch and bent down, just staring at him. Could he really have feelings for me? I mean, I was a kidnapper. I was a thief and a criminal. I was a low life that hasn't done good in a while. I was a dangerous wreck. Still, the thought of Harry liking me made me feel... important. It made me want things I've never wanted before.

I gently slid my arms underneath his back and his knees before picking him up slowly. Sure, he was tall, but he was much lighter than he looked. It was so easy to pick him up. I felt the warmth of him as his head rested on my chest and he seemed to snuggle into me. It felt like nothing I've ever felt before. I didn't want to pull away from him.

I carried him all the way to the room he was staying in, about to walk in but changed my mind. I didn't want him in there all alone. I didn't know if I would regret this, but I felt like I just needed to do it. I carried him to my room and stopped outside the door. I opened it up and walked inside.

I gently laid him down in my bed and laid next to him. "Louis?" He grumbled as he rubbed his eyes a bit. I felt a bit guilty for disturbing his sleep, but I didn't think the couch would be so comfortable for him. "Where am I?" He asked, eyes still closed.

I didn't give him an answer, only tried to lull him back to sleep. "Shh. Go back to bed, Harry." I whispered. He gave a heavy sigh as he pulled the blanket over him and snuggled his head against my chest. I left my hands in the air, not knowing if I should place them around him. This wasn't how this whole ransom was supposed to work out.

Finally, I put my hands down gently around his waist. They got tired from being in the air, but deep down inside this was what I wanted. To hold this incredible boy. This boy that made me feel human and not like a complete monster.

"I don't know what you're doing to me, Harry." I said as soon as I felt his breathing settle, signaling that he was at least lightly sleeping. He was so beautiful and incredible, but he made me feel something I shouldn't. I can't have him knowing that. The way our relationship was before these thoughts plagues my mind, that's how it should still be.

I had to keep him on the chain, but I didn't have to pull him all the way in.


	9. Newfound Freedoms

HARRY

I woke up alone, in a different room than I was staying in. I vaguely remember the feel of warm arms wrapped around me, but maybe that was just a dream. A desirable dream at that. A dream about Louis. I knew he was bad for me, but I couldn't doubt the way that I felt for him.

I sat up in the bed a little and looked around the room, recognizing the mirror in the corner. Louis' room. Why was I in here when I fell asleep on the couch?

I didn't have time to think about it because the door opened and Louis walked in, wearing a satisfied smile. It held a dark veil behind it, but I tried to ignore that part, my heart longing for a simple touch from him. He closed the door and then leaned against it, crossing his arms and smirking at me. I felt a bit self-conscious underneath his gaze, but then he spoke and I could breathe again.

"I'm surprised you were still here last night. Thought you would've ran for the hills." He commented. I couldn't do anything but shake me head. He told me to stay, and as much as I hated it, I would listen to him.

He walked closer to me and sat on the bed beside me. I wanted to scoot closer to him, but I controlled my body, begging it to stay put. I can't exactly let him know how much he affects me with just the smallest things he does. The smallest moves he makes.

His hand reached out and pushed my hair back from my eyes, and I almost leaned into his touch, but I couldn't. I couldn't let him know. There is no doubt he would only laugh at my pathetic feelings and then tell me I'm nothing but his toy. Still, is it bad that I would gladly just be his toy?

"I think... you deserve a reward for being such a good boy." He said as he leaned closer to me. I gulped as his lips were so close to mine. Touching, but not colliding into one another. He smirked and a shiver ran through me at the feeling of his lips moving against mine slightly.

"Would you like that?" He asked. Damn it! I would. I so do, but I didn't want to admit it. Yet, I couldn't bring myself to fight it. I nodded and then Louis' lips slammed against mine in a hungry kiss. It was a mesh of lips, tongue, and teeth, but neither of us cared. It was like we craved each other, though I knew it was only one sided.

I felt his fingers trail up my shirt, and I shivered at the touch.He pulled back so he could pull my shirt off, and I saw him bite his bottom lip as his eyes raked up and down my exposed chest. I shrank back a bit until he leaned in again me pressed his lips to mine in a rough kiss.

He pushed me down on the bed and then leaned back to take his shirt off. He threw it onto the floor and I was pulled into the perfectly tanned skin that was Louis. He was simply stunning, and he seemed to always be on my mind.

He grabbed both of my hands and pinned them above my head. "Keep these up here." He whispered, and I nodded. It's not like I would deny his orders. He had some sort of weird hold on me that I have yet to explain. I was thrown out of my thoughts when Louis' lips pressed to mine in a quick kiss.

I just started to kiss back when he broke away and began kissing down my neck. It seemed fast, yet rough. I desperately wanted to tangle my hands in his hair, but knew to follow his orders. His hands traveled to my jeans and I allowed him to undo them and pull them off of me. I shivered as he kissed down my thighs and legs as he pulled my pants down. "So fucking hot." He groaned as he also pulled my boxers off, so I was fully exposed to him.

I watched with lustful eyes as Louis also took off the rest of his clothes before climbing on top of me. He bent down and didn't kiss me, but I desperately wanted him to. I wanted to feel his lips on mine. Maybe Louis didn't feel what I felt for him, that weird and unusual pull, but I secretly loved it.

His fingers traveled over my chest, feeling only the very tips of his fingers on my body. It felt amazing, and it was driving me insane to know that I was the only one fully undressed. I desperately wanted to feel Louis against me, pressed to me, inside of me. It was a strange addiction I've grown fond of.

"Please." I whined as Louis' fingers got lower and lower, finally taking me into his hand. I let out a moan, desperately wanting his hand to make friction with my member, but he wasn't moving at all. He seemed almost in a daze, which made his movements hesitant.

"Louis, please." I begged, and he snapped back to reality, looking down at me. He gave me his same cocky smile and then his lips were pressed against my neck, making me close my eyes as he nipped at my skin. His smooth hand pumped me between his fingers, adding the perfect amount of pressure while doing it. I was still bothered by the fact that he was still wearing clothing, and I decided to rush things a bit.

My fingers traveled to Louis' jeans and I barely touched his zipper before he got the message and he hurriedly got off of me to take the rest of his clothing off. I stayed put, not wanting to move from my spot, eyes raking over his tanned skin. I can't believe he exists at times, but then I realize that it makes perfect sense. His beauty is balanced out by his wicked ways. Still, he was all I could find myself thinking about, the thought of home seeming slightly less appealing than before, which frightened me.

I stopped thinking so much when Louis was back on top of me. "No prep." He said and that sounded surprisingly appealing to me. I nodded and he pressed a burning kiss to my chest before he lined himself up with my entrance and then slowly pushed into me. I moaned at the familiar feeling of Louis. "Like that, slut?" He asked, and all I could do was nod.

I wanted to touch him, but I knew to keep my hands put. He told me to keep them where they were, but it was so hard not to claw onto his back or wrap my arm around his waist or hand around his bicep. I wanted to touch him in any sort of way and it was becoming pure torture to not have that contact.

Louis pulled out almost completely before he pushed back into me, and I let out a deep moan, loving this feeling. Louis repeated the same action, each time making it feel even better than the thrust before. I whined as he hit my prostate harshly and I couldn't stop my hands from leaving the bed and flying to his shoulders.

Louis immediately stopped thrusting and looked me in the eyes, panting before he spoke. "Thought I said to keep your hands put." He said with a devious smirk. "I think I should go harder. Hmm, Harry? Do you want me to be rough with you?" He asked.

It reminded me of the one time Zayn had me against the wall, asking me the same question. I instantly noticed my different reactions. With Zayn, I just wanted him to leave, but with Louis, I was curious as to how it would feel. He made everything feel incredible. I didn't have any control over my head as I nodded, my eyes immediately going wide as I realized I did. Louis smirked at me and then slammed out lips together, roughly pulling me hands off of him and onto the bed before slamming himself into me, making me break the kiss to yell out in my new-found pleasure.

"So damn tight, babe." He groaned before nipping at my neck. Butterflies erupted in my stomach at the nickname, but it was replaced with the dropping feeling of a stinging pleasure as Louis pushed into me just as roughly. I groaned, loving the new feeling. I never knew something so harsh could feel so amazing.

"Louis!" I yelled out and that seemed to edge him on even more because his pace quickened even more and each thrust was deeper. I felt him hit my prostate every time he pushed into me, and it all became to much to contain. I released onto my stomach, Louis not even having to touch me once. I would probably say that this was the best orgasm I've ever had, even though I've only had a few. Louis also shot his seed into me and I gasped at the warm feeling, slowly coming down from a high.

"Good boy." He whispered.

***************************

There was a knock on the door and I slowly opened my eyes, feeling extremely tired today. Yesterday was such a slow day. After Louis and I, well, had sex, all we did was get clean and then Louis abruptly left, saying he had to talk to Zayn and Liam. It left me feeling so curious, but I knew better than to ask anything about it. He was probably setting up the whole ransom plan, I just hoped my mum and dad didn't pay any money. I'm not worth it.

This all flew out of my head as the door was gently pushed opened and Liam poked his head inside. I looked over at him and he smiled "Hey there. Um, Louis wants you in the living room." He said. That was new. The last time Louis needed to talk to me or needed something from me, I got a rude awakening, tortured by the upset voices of my parents and Niall, and lost my virginity. Such a weird turn.

I nodded at Liam and got up, not even bothering to change into anything. I was just so damn tired. I decided that the sweatshirt and boxers I was wearing was enough. I couldn't really care less at the moment, wishing I could just sleep a bit more. Turns out, you get really tired after having it so rough.

I felt the sting in my arse as I walked, knowing exactly why I felt it, but I ignored it and attempted to walk regularly, which I would say I did a good job at. Liam visibly gulped as I walked towards him, and I wondered what his problem was, but let it go as I followed him down the hall- the way I've only taken a handful of times before. The way to a freedom that may never come.

We turned into the living room, and I saw Louis sitting in the middle of a couch, Zayn standing behind the couch. He turned to me and I saw him bite his lip as his eyes traveled up and down my body, immediately regretting my clothing decision. I ignored it though as Louis spoke up. "Please sit, Harry." He pointed to another couch across from him and I hesitantly sat down, wondering if I did something wrong.

Liam joined Zayn, standing behind the couch and my eyes focused on Louis, as he was in charge here. "I've decided to let you have a bit of freedom, considering the fact that you didn't escape while you could've." He began, and hope soared up through me. What kind of freedom was I getting?

"You won't be locked in your room anymore, you can roam the house all you want, as long as you don't try to escape. If you do attempt to run away, you will be locked up again." He said with a very formal, business-like voice. He seemed to have no clear emotions whatsoever. Still, the news was amazing.

I contained my smile as Louis continued. "Of course, the door will still be locked at night time, just as precaution, but all the other times, I expect you to follow orders and not try to leave. We will find you." He said. It was a promise. One that sent shivers up my spine, but the good news blocked all of that out. I wouldn't be holed up in the horrid room anymore! I can finally look out of a window, get light from one!

"I understand." I said with a curt nod, trying to not show how happy I was about this news. I was just glad to be a bit free, being able to walk around, sit anywhere, not lay in bed all day, eat when I need to. It was so much freedom, yet not enough. Not the kind I needed.

"Good. We're done here then. I have business to attend to, but I will be back soon enough. Zayn, come on. Liam, watch out for him." He said. He turned to wall away, not even sparing me a glance, which made me feel a bit upset, but he did give me freedom from my room.

Zayn looked at me one last time before he followed Louis out of the door, leaving me alone with Liam. To be honest, I was just glad it wasn't Zayn I was left alone with. Heaven knows what he would try to do. Probably the same thing he's already tried so many times. And there would be no Louis or Liam to stop him.

"So, what do you want to do?" Liam asked, pulling me out of my scary thoughts. I looked around the place and thought about what we could do. My eyes finally settled on the black box in front of us. I saw my reflection in the grey screen and remembered the times when Niall and I would lounge around at home and watch random TV shows.

"Um, can we watch the telly?" I asked quietly. I knew Liam wasn't mean, but I don't know what would set any one of them off. I shouldn't be scared of Liam, yet I couldn't shake the small amount of fear I do have. I don't know why. Even the first time we met, if you could call it meeting, he tried to get me to calm down. He's so gentle and sweet.

"Sure." He said with a smile, getting up to get the remote that was lying on top of the box. He sat back down on the couch and turned the television on. "Anything particular you want to watch?" He asked, and I shrugged. I didn't really watch any TV shows that I needed catching up on, and I was really just trying to fill time up.

Liam began to channel surf, channel after channel showing small bits of things, me searching for anything that will catch my interest. There were mainly a lot of commercials, but there were some shows, just ones I was not very familiar with.

Liam was getting into the news channels and my heart skipped a beat at one of them. "STOP!" I yelled and Liam flinched at my outburst, looking over at me. "Go back! Go back!" I yelled and he obeyed, clicking back one channel to the news channel that had my picture on it. It was as recent a picture as any, me smiling for the camera with a dark blue long sleeve on and looking like my life was perfect at the moment the picture was captured.

"Harry, maybe you shouldn't watch this..." Liam trailed off as I leaned forward, trying to hear everything the news anchor was saying.

"Police are looking for a young man named Harry Styles. The Styles' family is well known in London due to their many inventions and investments to the community. The family has received a call from the kidnapper of the sixteen year old male and have been informed that his kidnapping is to be used as a ransom to get money from the wealthy family. Investigators are searching the boy's room looking for any clues, but no leads have been found yet." The lady then announced her name and the news channel before they switches to another news anchor talking about another issue.

My heart sank. My voice seemed lost to me. I couldn't think of a single thing to say. The only sound that came out was a strangled sob. I didn't to cry. I didn't want to.

"Harry, are you okay?" Liam asked. He came over and sat next to me, patting my back to get me to calm down, but I was so past the point of calming down. I knew he knew that I wasn't okay, but it was the typical question to ask when someone seemed down or broken.

I couldn't respond. I wanted to yell out at him that I was far from okay. I wanted to yell at him, blame him, all of them, for my pain because they took me. I wanted to completely lash out at him because he deserved to feel the pain I was feeling right now, but Liam was trying to help me out. Besides, none of my thoughts were flowing along coherently.

"Let's do something else, yeah? Take your mind off of things." He suggested and I nodded as he turned the TV off and set the remote down on the coffee table. I didn't really want to do anything but go home. Still, there was a pull that kept me here. Made me want to stay here. I knew the reason and it made me sick. I made myself sick, but I didn't want to change that feeling I felt.

***************************

Turns out, Liam was good at helping me forget the news story. We were currently sitting on the couch with a bowl of fruit on each of our laps. I threw a grape at him and he tried to catch it in his mouth, while he threw a raspberry at me and I tried the exact same thing. We both laughed at the many, many failed attempts we made.

"We suck at this." I commented with a small smile as I gave up and ate a strawberry. Liam chuckled and said "Speak for yourself. I think I caught about five of what you've thrown."

I stuck my tongue out at him and threw a blueberry at him, but pouted when he caught it in his mouth. He smirked at me, showing me that he caught the fruit before he shut his mouth and ate it. "I hate you." I said, though I was only playing. He's been really kind and helpful to me this whole time, and I was thankful for that.

"Really?" He asked, and he actually looked hurt. I shook my head and said "No. You've helped me a lot. So, thank you, I guess." I said and Liam smiled a warm smile at me. It was one that reached his eyes and made them sparkle.

"Yeah, I'm like your knight in shining armor." He joked and I shoved his shoulder over a little. He did the same to me, but I wasn't sitting as sturdy as he was, so I started to fall off of the couch. I tried to grab Liam's hand to pull myself back up, but it was futile. I ended up pulling him down with me and I landed first with him landing on top of me, fruit flying all over the floor around us.

We were both laughing at the scenario we were in. The laughter died down as Liam held himself up with his arms and looked down at me. His smile slowly faded and he looked straight into my eyes. I was a bit confused at the shift, but then surprised as I saw him lean in and felt his lips on mine.

I pushed him back at bit, feeling that same feeling I always felt when I rejected Niall because Liam was just as nice as Niall. I saw him as a friend, too. "Liam..." I said, trailing off, and he nodded, blushing a bit.

"Sorry, I just-"

"It's fine-"

We were trying to talk at the same time and it was so awkward. We both froze as the front door opened and Louis and Zayn walked in. Liam quickly crawled off of me, and I sat up quickly. We clearly didn't move fast enough because when I looked at the both of them, Louis was glaring between us and Zayn had a smug look on his face.

"Have fun?" Louis asked with clenched teeth. Liam stood up and tried to talk, but Louis cut him off. "Clean the fucking floor. Harry, go to your room!" He said in a frustrated tone. Why did I have to go to my room? He said that was for only if I tried to escape again or do something wrong. I didn't do anything!

"But you said-"

"GO TO THE DAMN ROOM!" He yelled, his voice filling the whole room. I flinched in fear, Louis' angry tone was the scariest thing I've ever heard in my life. It was ruthless and so demanding. I quickly got up from the ground and went to my room I was supposed to stay in feeling angry myself. I hated the way he acted. I hated being in this damned room. I hated him. But I didn't. Not really.

I refrained from slamming the door, knowing it would only get me into more trouble, but I was so clueless as to what I did. Nothing really even happened! I desperately wanted to know why he sent me back to this stupid, bare room.

I turned around as the door flew open and Louis stepped in. He looked really mad, seething in anger. Was it so wrong that I was a bit turned on by this side of him?

"What the fuck was that!?" He yelled, closing the door and stepping inside. I was so confused. What the hell was his problem?

I gave him a confused look and he rolled his eyes. "Why the hell was Liam on top of you!? Tell me what fucking happened, Harry, and you better be telling the truth!" He said as he stepped even closer to me. I was against the wall and his hands were planted on either side of my face, blocking any way I could get out of this situation.

"N-nothing." I tried, my stuttering not helping at all. Maybe I should just say that Liam kissed me, but I didn't know why I felt that would get Liam in trouble. Maybe because of the way Louis reacted to the hickey Zayn gave me.

"Don't fucking lie to me, Harry!" He yelled, punching the wall next to my head. I cringed in fear before my anger rose through me.

"NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED!" I yelled back at him. I expected him to probably be shocked that I yelled at him, but he only grew even more pissed off.

"IT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE NOTHING TO ME!" He yelled as he gripped my arms. His grip was tight, making me whimper at the pain I was feeling. Why was he so mad?

"It looked like you wanted Liam to fuck you!" He yelled at me, hos voice not as loud as before, but still threatening. What? Was this what this whole thing was about? Wait, why would he even care? Well, he did say he didn't like to share.

"No, I didn't! I fell off the couch, he tried to catch me, but we both ended up falling on the floor. That's when you walked in!" I said, leaving out the extra stuff. Louis face fell, he seemed to calm down, but my mouth wouldn't stop running.

"Next time you should ask before fucking assuming things, you fucking prick! And who the hell cares if I do want Liam to fuck me? That's my decision to make!" I yelled, not knowing why I was still speaking. "Maybe I should want him, considering the fact that he's the only one who treats me like a fucking human being in this house of hell!" I finished.

I was breathing harder than before, trying to calm down. Louis' eyes filled with anger again...and something else. I feared what he would do next, but I was so surprised. He let go of me and said "Fine. Fuck whoever you want. It's not like I care. As soon as I get my money, you'll be gone anyways." He turned and left the room, leaving me feeling broken.

I didn't want to cry. I didn't want to, but I did. I cried and yelled at the locked door he left through, banging on it and just getting all my frustration out. I hated everything right now. I hated that I was still so desperate for Louis after he treats me this way. I hated how I felt like we just broke up, even though we were never together. I hated my scenario, and I hated my life.

I cried until I became sleepy, not even having the strength to walk back to the bed, so I slid down against the door and shut my eyes slowly. I was half asleep when the door opened, only a bit because I was leaning against it. I saw the light from the hallway get blocked out as a figure slipped inside and lifted me up. Strong, familiar hands picking me off of the ground and carrying me to the bed.

I wanted to open my eyes, but I couldn't. I was so, so tired. I felt like this was all a dream. I fell into a deeper sleep, but my senses were awake. I felt a kiss pressed on my temple, but it was gone so soon. I was confused, frustrated, and wanting to open my eyes. Finally, I gave up and let sleep pull me in.


	10. Tempers Turn

I woke up instantly hurting, remembering everything that happened yesterday. I felt numb, which is new to me because even when thoughts of suicide crossed my mind from being here, I never felt numb. I only felt a deep sadness, a longing for everything that I used to be familiar with, but never numb.

There was that familiar knock on the door, but this time it wasn't as comforting as it used to be. I didn't really know what to say to Liam. I've only seen him as a friend, if even that. I mean, he was my kidnapper, but he was so kind and tried to help me out in his own way. That seemed like a friend to me, but it wasn't natural to be friends with your capture.

He opened the door and walked in, empty handed this time. I was a bit confused, so used to him bringing in food with him. "Good morning." He said while awkwardly scratching his neck. I can tell that, just like me, he didn't know what to say.

"Good morning." I replied before we both fell silent. It wasn't so much that I felt awkward around Liam, it's just that I felt guilty. It was that same guilt I always felt with Niall. Knowing that the person was so nice and caring towards me, but feeling nothing more than friendship for them. Maybe I just wanted things that I couldn't have? Or maybe Zayn was right and I do like being treated like crap.

"Listen, I'm sorry for kissing you. I know that you have this thing with Louis..." He trailed off, and I didn't really know what to say. I don't know what I even had with Louis. It was more lust and pleasure than anything else. The sucky part was that I had feelings for him. That fact hit me hard as I barely realized it. I had actual feelings for Louis, that's why it hurt me so much when he yelled at me yesterday.

"I get that you belong to him, but-" That statement caught my attention, and even though I was interested in Louis, I did not belong to him. That sounds like I'm some kind of toy to him. Then again, maybe I was. I was supposed to only be here for ransom, but I've been sleeping with Louis with no regrets. Even now.

"I don't belong to Louie." I huffed out, and Liam looked confused for a second. "He doesn't care who I'm with, and I'm not just someone's possession." I said and Liam nodded.

"Yeah, I get that. I'm still sorry though. I get that we're just friends. We are friends, right?" He asked, seeming just as uncertain about the idea as I was. It was such a weird and confusing position. Never have I thought I would get taken or that I would befriend one of my captures.

"We're friends." I said and I saw relief fall onto his face as he gave me a soft smile. My guilt left my body as I truly saw that Liam was okay with this. Maybe he was just that kind of person. Maybe he wasn't one to chase after someone that he knows won't return his feelings. Not like Niall, hell, not like me.

"Good. I hoped so. Now c'mon. We're already eating breakfast and Louis could get the wrong idea since we're taking a while." He said, trying to joke around, but I felt a heavy tug at my heart. Louis doesn't care. But even as I thought it, I knew it was a lie. Louis was very possesive and he seemed really pissed off yesterday.

I nodded and got off of the bed, following Liam. "Um, what happened between you two yesterday? What did Louis say?" I asked him. I just wanted to know if he got into any trouble like I did. I wanted to know if he cracked and told Louis about the kiss.

"He completely lost his shit." Liam said simply. "He said that I was only supposed to keep an eye on you, not attempt to suduce you." He rolled his eyes, finding it quite humorous because that's exactly what Louis should tell himself. Still, I'm glad he didn't.

We turned into the kitchen and Zayn and Louis were sitting at the island eating pancakes. It was such a familiar, homely scene that it seemed unusual here. It seemed like they actually lived normal domesticated lives, which was an awkward side to see to your kidnappers- the people keeping you hostage.

They both looked up at us. I saw Zayn smirk at me, sending that self-conscious feeling washing over my body. My skin crawled under his gaze, but didn't react. He still creeped the hell out of me. Then there was Louis. As soon as my eyes met his, he looked away. He continued eating and talked to me, but never looked up.

"Gonna eat anything?" He said and I whispered out a small yes as Liam pointed to the empty seat beside him, a plate of pancakes stacked three high on top of the table. I was a bit hesitant about sitting next to Liam because of yesterday's events, but I sucked it up. If Louis was pissed about it that was his problem because nothing bad even happened. It was all taken out of context, well, most of it.

I slowly began to eat and then they all started talking to each other, as if the conversation was already set and flowing before I came in.

"Do we have anything to do today?" Zayn asked Louis. Liam and him both waited for him to respond, but he seemed a bit off today. He seemed ticked off, and I knew he wasn't over yesterday. He wasn't over our fight, and neither was I, but I hid it better than he currently was. He wouldn't even look my way.

"No. Not yet anyway. I was thinking about having another pleasant call with Harry's family." He said, and I froze. A part of me wanted to hear their voices, let them know that I was still okay. A part of me wanted to promise that I would find a way back to them. A part of me wanted to hear Niall say he loved me, even though he meant it in a different way than I did when I said it. But the other part of me didn't want to hear them crying. Another part of me didn't want to lie to them and say everything was fine. Another part of me didn't want them to feel sorry for me when I was currently falling for my kidnapper.

"Why?" I asked. They all looked at me, and I felt a bit accomplished because I had Louis' attention. "They would only cry and plead like they did the first time. What would be the point of threatening them even more when they're already hoping I will be okay and return home?" I said. I didn't want them to hurt anymore, but I didn't want them to pay money for me.

"Because it's evident that they know they still have someone to pay for. It's like an incentive. Think about this. Would you rather hear their tears for you, knowing that you're okay, or no longer have any contact in them, have them forget about you, and you never return home because they finally come to the realization that you might already be dead." He spat.

"They wouldn't forget about me." I said, gripping my fork in my hand. I hated the very idea of having my parents, Niall, everyone give up on me and just... forget. That couldn't happen. Could it?

"Oh, but they will. Funny thing about people is that they don't remember what's not there. Out of sight, out of mind, Hazza." He said, mocking me with a nickname. "They will eventually give up and lose hope. Even your precious little boy toy." He said, and that pissed me off the most.

"Niall is not my boy toy!" I yelled as I stood up from the table. I threw my fork onto my plate and said "He actually loves me! He would never forget me!" I raged, hoping that I was right.

"You get perks from leading him on? Acting like you give a damn?" Louis asked, leaning back a bit in his chair, an emotionless expression on his face. I have never led Niall on before. He always knew I saw him as a friend. "Because if he meant so much to you, you wouldn't betray him by sleeping with the person that caused you pain." He said, no tone to his voice. He seemed robotic right now.

My mouth fell open, shocked that he stooped that low just because he was a bit hurt over nothing. "Fuck you!" I yelled and I guess that crossed the line for Louis. I don't think he's ever had someone talk back to him that way. He stood up and it all happened so fast before I felt pain in my hand. It wasn't a slap, not a death grip on it, it was a knife stabbed into my hand, pressed against the table.

I didn't scream, though the pain was so unbearable. I think we were all shockes at first. Nobody moved, but then we all reacted at the same time. I bit my lip, tears springing from my eyes as I gripped the knife, pulling it from my hand, the blood dripping down my palm.

Liam stood up, looking rather sick at the sight of blood. He ran from the room, holding his mouth, and I knew he was going to be sick. Zayn was by my side, taking hold of my hand and examining it. "We need to bandage this. C'mon, Harry." He said. It was the first time Zayn has talked to me, using my real name instead of gorgeous, and not hitting on me.

We were all reacting, except for Louis. He still seemed shocked about what he just did. Shocked and frozen in place, except for when Zayn led me out of the kitchen. I turned back once, seeing Louis sit back down shakily, hands tugging on his hair and I could swear on my life I heard a sniffle and a choked sob escape him.

***************************

"Ow!" I yelled in pain as Zayn sprayed disinfectant on my wound. My whole hand felt the stinging pain, but he just shushed me as he focused on fixing me the best he could. It's not like they could take me to a hospital. What would they say? "This is Harry Styles, the boy who's all over the news because he was kidnapped. Well, we brought him here because his main capture stabbed him in his hand, so we'd appreciate if you'd fix everything and never tell anyonr about this." That would be a laugh.

"It didn't go as deep as I thought it did, so that's good. Didn't tear any ligamenta or veins. It'll heal and you'll be fine. Probably have a faint scar from it." Zayn said as his deduction. He sounded so experienced in this stuff, and it was actually pretty impressive.

"Why do you sound like you should work in a hospital?" I asked as he began to wrap a bandage around my hand, the blood now dry from him putting pressure on it, not matter how much it hurt.

"Believe it or not, I did go to college. I originally wanted to be in medicine, a doctor or some shit." He said with a bitter sounding chuckle. That was actually surprising. I would have never expected anything like that from Zayn. He seemed to... forward?

"The thing was, I sort of got into trouble. Got involved with the wrong crowd. My parents basically disowned me, but you know, who needs 'em?" He said. I could tell the fact upset him, but he was trying to play it off as something less than what it was. "I started to fall behind on class work, ended up dropping out of college. Stupidest idea ever." He said while shaking his head. He finished bandaging my hand and said "Well, there ya go. No need to thank me." He began to put the stuff away, but I was still curious about his past. I wanted to know more.

"What did you do after college?" I asked him. He seemed surprised by my question, and he froze for a second. His gaze seemed distant, as if he was going back to that time.

"I joined a gang. Terrible idea, but I needed money and they could get it. Drugs mainly. Sold them, but I never did them. It just helped to keep up this bad boy persona. Intimidating, you know?" He asked rhetorically, but I knew what he meant. He even intimidated me.

"When I did want to get out, it was difficult. They would've been out to get me- my family. They did. My sister was walking home one night from her friend's house, and they- they-" he paused, taking a deep breath and seething in anger. Maybe I pushed him too far with this.

"Zayn..." I said, lightly touching his arm. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to." I told him. I barely knew him. We'vs barely even spoke to one another, and he didn't have to divulge everything to me right away. I could tell it wasn't easy for him to do this, and I could tell he wasn't ready to tell me this.

He nodded slightly, showing that he understood. He took a deep breath, shaking as tears sprang from his eyes. I felt so out.of place. I seriously overstepped a boundary with him. I didn't mean to though. Or maybe I did.

"Thank you." He said as he sorted himself out. "Anyways, the point was that I had a life before I screwed it all up. Might interest you that Louis actually helped me. He got me out of the gang, made everything better. Not as good as it was before, but... better." He said with a final nod. "So despite what you think of him, he's no evil. Twisted, maybe, but not evil."

I never thought of Louis as evil. The thought that he could be has never even crossed my mind. Yes, he caused me emotional amd physical pain, but I never thought of him as evil. Hell, I actually like him more than I should. Well, I shouldn't like him at all!

"I know that." I mumbled, but Zayn didn't hear it. He put all the stuff back from where he got it. We both walked out of the small restroom and I stopped at the door to my bland and vacant room. I touched the door handle and then turned to Zayn. "Thank you." I said.

He rolled his eyes and said "What part of 'No need to thank me' do you not understand?" I knew he was just playing though because he was wearing a smile on his face as he said it. I actually felt closer to Zayn, like I understood why he came on so strongly to people. He wanted others to perceive him that way. It was his cover-up.

I was still insanely curious on what happened to his sister, but that secret could wait until I knew him better. I felt determined to know Zayn. I feel like I never really gave him a chance. I gave Liam one because he seemed nice, but Louis never did- I still gave hin a chance. I'm still giving him a chance, and I had no idea why.

"All of it?" I asked, not really knowing how to respond. He chuckled at that and I found myself admiring his smile. I just noticed that he usually smirks, but it never reached his eyes- this one did.

"You know you don't have to go to your room, right?" Zayn asked and I barely noticed that I was doing that. I knew why, too. Louis. Last time I made him upset he sent me to my room, I guess it was just my first reaction after making him upset now. It seemed logical though. To get out of the way of someone who wasn't on the beat terms with you. Still, I needed to keep some of my freedom to myself.

"Uh, yeah. I knew that. I just... need to change my shirt. Blood stains." I said, thankful that the lie was actually true. I had a few drops of blood littering my shirt, but I didn't notice until now. "I'll be out soon." I said. He nodded and then turned, walking down the hall and back to the living room.

I went into the room and saw Liam sitting on the bed. He rose once he saw me come in and ran up to me. "Are you okay? Did the blood stop? I can't believe that happened. Are you alright?" He asked, throwing questions at me one after the other. He cared so much, and it reminded me of Niall.

I gave him a smile and nodded. "Yes, Liam. I'm fine. Zayn fixed me up." I assured him. He seemed to breathe out a sigh of relief and then sat back down on the bed. I went to the closet and grabbed a new shirt off of the hanger.

"Sorry I didn't help you. Just... the sight of blood makes me woozy, and I feel so faint." He confessed, but I understood. My mum was the same exact way. Whenever I cut my finger or scraped my knew on accident she woudl freak out until my dad handled it. I was surpringly okay with blood- being able to handle it.

"I sort of guessed that." I said. I quickly changed in the closet, feeling okay because Liam couldn't see me. I walked out and sat next to him on the bed. "My mum used to lose her mind at the sight of blood. She never liked it because it freaked her out. My dad would always be the one to patch up my cuts and bandage me. He always said that I was tough to just walk everything off like I did. It's because I saw how strong he was, and I looked up to him in that light. That's why I never want to see, or hear, my father being because if he doesn't know what to do, how would I?" I finisged, feeling rather gloomy now.

Hearing my father so hurt, yet try to keep composed on the phone was what kept me strong. Knowing he was there as a rock for everyone back home who needed it. I knew he would take care of them all, and he would definitely find out how to get me out of here again. Louis was wrong. If it's one thing my family does we never give up. Ever.

We also never forget. They'll find me, even if it takes years. Niall, I'm not so sure about. He may forget me. Surely he couldn't love me forever, but I know that he will always be a good friend and he would do anything in his power to help until that point came. I hope none of them forgot me because without the hope of knowing they still care, I'm completely done caring myself.

"Seems like he's still that strong, but so are you." Liam said. I looked up at him and knew that he meant what he was saying. "He seriously must've passed it on because you are probably the strongest person I've ever met before, Harry." I smiled and then Liam stood up. "Now let's go watch some television, hopefully find a show that's actually enjoyable." He said, and I laughed.

We left my room and made our way into the living room, seeing Zayn and Louis there already. Zayn gave me a small smile, probably feeling more comfortable around me, or embarrassed that I know part of his story. I was going to smile back, but Louis gave a snarky comment.

"Finally stopped crying like a little bitch?" He asked. I didn't comment on how I heard hos choked sobs or his sniffles when I was leaving. I left it alone as I sat down next to Liam. I felt the throbbing, stinging pain in my hand and knew that Louis' words hurt worse than any physical pain I could take.

That's when I realized. With my family, Niall, Zayn, and Liam, I was strong, but Louis made me weak. I was weak around Louis.


	11. I Want You

There was nothing but a long tunnel, a light at the end of it. I was running, but the light only seemed to get further and further away. I tried to run, but it was then that I noticed the chain that was wrapped around me ankle, hearing the constant clack, clack, clack of the chain against the ground. I was running in place.

I turned around, my eyes suddenly adjusting to the darkness around me. I saw the shadow of someone standing right behind me. It was such a familiar shadow, and I found myself wanting to reach out and grab it. It was like my body craved to be near it, around it, with it.

"Do you want to leave? The light is waiting." It whispered. I has forgotten that the light was even there at the end of the tunnel, so mesmerized by the darkness that currently surrounded me. I looked back at the light, which seemed closer than it ever was before. I could leave, but would I? This darkness was so compelling.

"All you have to do is unhook the chain. I won't stop you." The shadow said in such a sweet, soothing voice. Even though it didn't touch me, it seemed to wrap around me and caress me with its voice. It was a tantalizing touch, filling me with the sense of the danger it possessed. Yet, I still wanted to stay.

The chain was easy to unhook. I looked down at it, seeing that it was only slipped through a metal loop in the ground. I could just pull it free and then leave- walk straight into the light that led away from this dark place, but it didn't feel right to leave. I couldn't leave because I felt like the pull of the darkness was far too much.

"Gonna go?" The voice asked in a curious voice. I shook my head and sat down on the cold ground. The cement felt rough and cool against the palm of my hands. I looked up at the shadow and noticed a new feature it possessed, an incredible white smile that I knew was familiar. I knew who it belonged to.

"Harry." I heard someone whisper my name, and my eyes cracked open. I opened my eyes and looked around my room, seeing Liam standing beside my bed. "Hey, c'mon. I have to show you something." He said. I was sleepy and confused, but I still followed him anyways.

As I followed him down the hall, the dream I had played through my mind. I knew what every piece of that dream symbolized, and I knew that my dream self was only doing what I was currently doing. Staying. Staying because of the shadow- Louis.

"Sit down." Liam ordered once we got into the living room. I was so confused as he walked over to the TV and grabbed the remote. Why were we watching TV so late?

"Liam, what..? What are we doing?" I asked, so tired. I rubbed my eyes, but Liam only told me to sit down once again. I finally followed his orders, feeling much too tired to stand any longer anyways.

I sat on the soft couch and felt the warm and cozy fabric beneath me. The feel of the comfort was lulling me back to sleep, but I was quickly sitting in my seat as Liam turned the TV on and I saw my mum's face on the screen. "Wha-?" I asked, scooting closer to the TV.

"I recorded it when Louis and Zayn weren't here. I think you deserve to know that people are still looking for you, still caring, and I don't think they're gonna give up anytime soon. They seem very dedicated." He said. My heart swelled up with love and hope and my eyes with tears.

Liam pressed play and then a news reporter spoke before my mum did. "The Styles family gives their speech about the search for their son." I paid so much attention when my mum spoke, feeling like she was right here with me, but knowing she was still at home.

"I regret leaving him home alone." She began, and that broke my heart. She shouldn't blame anything on herself. None of them should. "He's only sixteen, but I thought he'd be fine. We've gone away before. He- he never wanted to miss school and he always had his friend with him. I thought- I thought he would be okay!" She said, her voice breaking near the end and she fisted the tissue that was in her hand before she continued.

"The worst thing I've ever experienced was coming home to see my son missing. At first we thought he was just out with his friend, or doing some shopping, so we waited. Then, we saw the broken vase, that the rooms were rummaged and searched through. Then we saw his phone lying on the floor- so many missed calls on it. His window was open, and he was gone." She said.

"He never came home. I stayed up all night hoping, not wanting to believe that he could be taken away from me. From us." She seemed like she was crumbling to pieces, but she stayed strong. That was what I loved about her. She was such a strong woman. My father came to her side, putting her arm around her for support, looking just as distraught.

"Then his friend, Niall came over. He told us everything that Harry said on the phone- everything. The police came back that next day, speaking to us about everything. It made it so real. We didn't know what to do." She took a moment and then spoke, sounding so strong.

"I want my baby home. I need him safe and sound. Please don't hurt him." She pleaded before she turned and cried into my dad's shoulder. My dad took the microphone and then said "Harry has never hurt anybody. He was always a kind soul. He has no intentions of hurting anyone, so for someone to do this- take an innocent person away from everything they know and use them for something as pathetic as ransom, it's sick. If you are watching, I want you to know that we will find you and you will face grave consequences. You took our son, and you will give him back. And Harry, if you are watching, we love you. All of us. We will not give up on you. Please stay safe. We need you home." He said.

They both turned from the microphone and then the screen went back to a new anchor reporting on other news. I was a complete mess, crying and not knowing what to do with myself. I was trying to cry quietly, knowing that Louis would probably be pissed if he knew Liam showed me this.

I felt arms wrap around me and I turned, hugging Liam and crying into his shirt sleeve. I needed this comfort from him. He was such a good person, and such a great friend. It made me feel even worse for not returning his feelings, but I just can't. I don't feel that way.

"Shh. You're okay, Harry. I just wanted you to see it. I'll record them all for you. Every single news report I can. People are looking for you, and regardless of what Louis' mission is here, I want you to be found. We just need to be careful about all of this. If Louis found out, I'm dead, and I have no clue what happens to you." He confessed.

I felt so grateful for Liam. He was doing all this for me. He was risking so much, but he didn't seem to care. I looked up at him and wiped my eyes a bit. "Thank you." I whispered and he smiled before he just held me for a while, calming me down from the strong emotions I was feeling.

My parents were looking, and they promised not to give up. That's all I need to go on.

***************************

We were all eating breakfast silently. There was a thick tension in the air and it felt heavy and awkward. Louis hardly seemed to be eating at all, and it was actually worrying me. I know it sounds stupid, but I did have feelings for him. Even that sounds stupid.

He just kept on ignoring me, and it made me feel so low and unimportant. I know that I should feel relieved that he's ignoring me, but I can't help but feel like I lost a connection with someone. It wasn't much of a connection, if you could call it that, but it felt important to me.

I moved my hand to pick my fork up again and winced in pain. My hand still hurt, a sting of pain riding its way through my hand. I didn't want to complain about the pain, but it was still there when I woke up this morning, not as intense, but a throbbing pain that spread through my hand.

"Need any help?" Liam asked me politely, but I shook my head. Last thing I needed was another reason for Louis to be pissed off at me. I desperately wanted him to say one word to me that wasn't fueled by hatred and venom. I craved his touch again, and it was absolutely maddening not to be able to feel it.

"Yeah, Liam. Next thing you know you'll be helping him dress as well. He's not a fucking child." Louis spat, never looking up from his plate of food. Even if his face never rose, his eyes still held a small gleam behind them, almost apologetic and guilty. Like he actually felt bad for causing me pain. But he couldn't. Not with the way he's been acting.

"I was just wondering. Maybe if his hand didn't hurt he wouldn't need help." Liam said, and I was a bit surprised. That was the first time I've heard Liam verbally disobey Louis right in his presence. I could tell Louis didn't particularly like it because he slammed his fist on the table out of anger. Liam immediately looked reserved, like he realized that he stepped out of place. I wondered why he was so prone to being under someone else's orders. Zayn was much more disobedient than Liam was.

"Clean this up." Louis said as he set his fork down and then stood up, leaving the kitchen in a brisk walk. Liam immediately got up and began to clean the table, taking the empty plates that were now in front of each of us. I saw Zayn frown a bit at Liam, seeming to know something I didn't, but I wouldn't be surprised. I didn't even know why Zayn acted how he did before last night.

"Need any help?" I asked Liam, trying to return the favor, but he shook his head just like I did.

"I got it. Thanks." He said before he turned and walked over to the sink, beginning to wash the dishes. I felt really bad for him because he seemed to be rather timid and zoned out now. He was being distant, and I know it had much more to do than just Louis' words. Something deeper than that.

"Um, let's go check your hand, Harry." Zayn said, and I nodded as we both stood up and he led me away from the kitchen. I glanced back once to see that Liam wasn't washing the dishes, just standing there and letting the water flow over his hands. It worried me, but he'll confess things when and if he wants to confess them. I wouldn't dare force secrets out of someone. Especially ones that made a person react like that.

We made our way into the small bathroom in the hallway, and I sat on the counter while Zayn turned to me. I held out my hand to him, and be began to unravel the bandage. I stung a bit as the wound came in contact with the air, but soon it felt slightly more relieved than it was in the bandage.

"Seems to be healing well." Zayn said as he observed both sides of my hand, even though the knife didn't stab all the way through. I'm sure he was just being cautious. "There's no sign of it becoming infected and the bleeding stopped. Can you move your hand?" He asked me, and I tried.

I moved my fingers a bit, wiggling them and then winced, feeling the sting of pressure in my palm. I hissed in pain and Zayn stopped my fingers from moving again. "Okay. That's normal. It will sting and possibly be sore for quite some time. Maybe three or four days. Then there will be an almost numb feeling, which means your cells are quickly working to repatch the skin and heal the wound. It should be over with by the end of the week, leaving nothing but a scar in its wake." He said rather quickly.

I blinked a bit, trying to take in everything that Zayn just explained. He really knew his stuff. "I know it sounds like a lot, but basically you'll feel pain, then it will numb out, and finally there will be a scar." He said in a much simpler way, and I nodded.

"Thanks, Zayn." I said with a small smile. I really enjoyed knowing another side to him than just the scary, intimidating side. I felt like I was one of few people who got to see this side of him, which also made me feel important.

He smiled back and held out a hand, helping me off of the counter. He opened the door and we both stopped as Louis walked by, stopping for a second to look at Zayn, but then he crossed his arms over his chest and walked on, not even sparing me a look. It hurt. I know it shouldn't, but I wanted Louis to pay attention to me again. I already know that my feelings are a one way street, because I'm the only one that has feelings here. He couldn't probably care less about me, except for the money I'm worth.

We both followed behind him, on our way back to the living room. We stepped into the room and I was surprised to see Liam just lounging on the couch, acting as if nothing happened. I was still worried about how he reacted, and knowing that he pretended it never happened made me even more worried for him. It was like Liam was completely emotionless to the world, just programmed to do what Louis said, but now he was back to his normal self.

I sat beside him on the couch and Zayn sat on the other side of me. Louis took a seat on the armchair in the room, and eventhough we were all watching TV, the silence felt awkward and made me uneasy. I looked over at Liam from the corner of my eye, and decided to ask him the question that was on my mind.

"Are you okay?" I whispered and he looked surprised at me before he nodded. He didn't speak though, and I needed to hear his voice to know he was truly alright. "What happened?" I asked, trying to get a response out of him, and I felt happy when I finally managed.

"Guess I just zoned out. I'm fine now. Thanks for caring though, Harry. How's your hand?" He asked me in that same whispered voice I spoke to him in. I guess we were both afraid of how Louis would react if he knew we were talking about things he didn't want us to talk about. Apparently my hand and others well-being is not allowed to be spoken of or something.

"It's fine. Zayn says it'll heal very soon. To be honest, it doesn't hurt anymore. Just feels a bit numb." I confessed, barely noticing the change in my hand's feeling. It didn't have that stinging pain anymore, but maybe it was just for a second.

"I'm sorry you got hurt. I really wish you could go home." He said, in an even softer voice than before, and I knew why. That statement alone could make Louis completely lose his mind. It'd be entering a danger zone.

"Yeah. Sometimes I just find myself counting each day I spend here, so I can know when I go home." I said, and then Liam and I both looked up in shock as Louis spoke up. I didn't think he heard any of our conversation, but apparently he did.

"Me, too. Don't worry, Styles, as soon as I get my money, I can finally drop your sorry self." He spat. "I can't wait until you leave."

That one statement hurt me more than any physical pain Louis' made me feel. It hurt to know that he wanted to get rid of me. It hurt that he treated me like shit, yet I wouldn't deny the feelings I had towards him. It hurt deep in my chest, and I felt like crying or screaming, just like I did the night Louis and I fought. I felt unstable.

I didn't reply. I just got off of the couch and left to that bare, empty room that I called my own for now. I heard Liam call after me before his tone changed and he was yelling at Louis, which I knew may cause him to go into that silent phase again, so it kind of worried me, but I was too upset to stop.

I ran all the way to my room and then slammed the door shut. I went to the wall, punching it as hard as I could with my fist, not noticing that it was the same hand that was stabbed. I yelled in pain as a sharp sting radiated through my hand, feeling like it was being pierced through again.

The door opened, and I automatically yelled. "Leave me the fuck alone, Louis!" I turned around and froze as I saw Zayn standing there, a look of pity in his eyes. But I didn't want him to feel pity. I didn't need pity when I was the one stupid enough to fall for my kidnapper.

"Are you okay, Harry?" He asked me. I nodded. What else was I supposed to do? It's not like I could just pout out all of my feelings on Zayn. He probably had enough to deal with in his life, not needing my burdens as well.

Still, he sighed and said "I know you're lying, Harry. You can tell me if you are hurt by what Lou-" I didn't want to hear his name. It hurt my heart so much to hear it, knowing that he only saw me as the token to his prize money. So what did I do to stop Zayn from speaking it? I rushed to him and pressed our lips together in a rushed kiss.

It didn't make me feel like Louis' lips did, but it was a distraction. Sadly, Zayn wasn't up for it. He pushed me away, but I could tell he was hesitant about it by the way his hands shook. I guess it was a bit low on my part, considering the fact that I already knew that he wanted to kiss me. I was just so mad at Lo- him.

"Harry..." Zayn said, trailing off on his words. "I know you're pissed off at Lo- him" He caught himself that time, and I was thankful for it. "Still, you know that you feel something for him. I would've never guessed it on my own, but Liam is very insightful on that kind of stuff." He said.

How did Liam know what I felt for Louis? I've never told him anything. I even told him that I didn't belong to Louis. I never gave him any verbal conformation on my feelings for him. Maybe he just assumed. Or maybe it was just that obvious for him. Liam wasn't exactly stupid.

"No I don't. He doesn't even like me anyways so it wouldn't matter, okay? You heard him, we all heard him. He wants to get rid of me as soon as he gets the money! And I don't even have a say in anything!" I yelled, feeling the anger simmer up inside of me again.

"Wait... are you saying you want to stay?" Zayn asked in a rather surprised and curious tone. Shit! None of them were supposed to know of my conflicted feelings. Curse this internal battle that I was constantly having with myself!

"Because I can tell you this. Eventhough it may seem like he wants you gone, you have to be able to see past that. Louis wants you to stay." It hurt to hear his name, and I just wanted to forget it. To drive away the pain.

"No he doesn't, and I don't care!" I said as I pulled Zayn in again, kissing him with no love or emotions at all- none except anger. It consumed me, boiled in my blood. I hated Louis. Yet I loved every little thing about him.

I felt Zayn gently push me away, but I resisted. Soon, I felt his walls get knocked down and he gave in. His craving took over and he took control of the kiss, pulling me closer to him than before. I tried imagining that there were sparks, lights, anything, but nothing. It wasn't the same.

We both jumped when the door was pushed opened, and we both saw Louis glaring at us. "What the hell is going on here?" He asked in an angry tone. I was dumbfounded right now, wondering why I kissed Zayn. Why did I again?

"I- It's not really what it looks like." Zayn said, and I knew he was only treading lightly with Louis; you had too. He was a ticking time bomb that needed to be difused.

"Bullshit! Harry, go to my room!" He yelled, and I protested. "No! You treat me like shit and you expect me to just follow your every command?" I growled back. I didn't know what he thought I was. I wouldn't just be treated that way.

Louis looked at me and my heart skipped a beat at the broken look in his eyes. When he spoke, it was a tone I never knew Louis could have. He whispered in a saddened voice one word. "Please."

He's never said that word before, and it made me curious as to why he was so desperate for this. Why did he all of a sudden take on this persona when he's been acting all high and mighty? I had no clue, but I knew that I would do as he asked because my emotions were slipping up again.

I silently walked out of the room, heard Louis say something to Zayn, and then heard him following behind me to his room. I remember exactly where it is, and I remember all the amazing memories that we shared there, even the ones in my room, too. I wanted to go back to those times, but, let's face it, I didn't just want to be Louis' sex toy.

We walked into his room and he closed the door behind him. I stood there, patiently waiting and then he turned around. I had to hold in my gasp of shock as he had tears in his eyes. He has never dared to cry infront of me, and I didn't really want him to, not when I saw him as this strong person with so much control and beauty.

"Harry, Why? Why Liam? Why Zayn?" He asked me, and eventhough his sentences were short and choppy, I knew what he was really asking by the amount of pain that he held in his voice. Why did I kiss them? That's what he was asking. And I had his answers.

"I didn't- Liam kissed me, okay? But he said he apologized and told me that he knows we're friends and that's how we're keeping it." It still made wonder if I should be worried because I just casually said I was friends with one of my kidnappers, as if it was expected of me.

"And Zayn, because I was angry. You- you don't seem to want me." I mumbled the last part, but it was evident that Louis heard me from how he reacted.

He walked to me and pressed my back to the wall, looking so deep into my eyes that I finally fot a flash of the emotion he held hidden in his. It ranged from pain and sadness to anger and destruction to hopeful and adoration. So much from eyes that always seemed to hold nothing.

"I do want you, Harry. More than you could ever know."


	12. Meant

I quickly pressed my lips to Louis', finally feeling that amazing rush that ran through my veins as our lips connected. It was magical, and it made me feel like I was floating into space. Everything else disappeared. It was only Louis. My thoughts, my senses, my heart- Louis'.

He kissed me back, and I felt all of my anger disperse from my body, flooding out into the kiss we were sharing. It quickly became a good snogging session, but I wasn't complaining. I felt like every single bone in my body ached for Louis' healing. I felt like my heart yearned for his loving.

"God, Harry. You're so perfect." He whispered out between kisses, speaking in a rather breathy voice. My lungs felt like they were burning, begging for me to break away and get air, but the kiss was intoxicating and addictive in so many ways. It took every single ounce of strength I had in me to pull away from Louis for air.

We were both breathing hard, our noses still pressed together, but our lips a bit a ways apart. I looked up at Louis and saw that his eyes were closed. His eyes were closed, but I noticed the soft smile that formed on his lips. It was an actual smile, just like the time he smiled in the kitchen.

I found myself hypnotized by his pretty, little smile, but then my attention switched back to his eyes as they opened and I was met with that ever deep sea of blue. They were like crystal waters just skimming the surface of the ocean. This time, the emotions weren't blocked, but rather exposed to anyone who cared to look.

"Harry, I- I like you. A lot, okay? I know that- that I'm not supposed to, but I do. There's something different about you, and it just pulls me in closer every time I see you." Louis said, and it made me feel so alive! My heart fluttered and I tried to hide my blush and look away. This is the first time I have ever been in a situation where I actually liked someone that way. And he was my kidnapper.

"Louis, you're my kidnapper. You're using me for ransom." I stated factually. It's not like I wanted to admit my emotions for him out loud. I think he already knew all about them from that kiss we just shared. I tried to muster as much of my feelings for him into it.

"I know." He sighed. "I know, but... maybe we can pretend. Until you have to...." I knew he was going to say until I had to leave, and I was glad that he trailed off. I find it scary that just thinking about leaving Louis gives me a small panic attack, but I just didn't want to be away from him. He was perfect in every way, and he had a pull on me, too. Stronger than what I had on him, most likely.

"Please?" He asked. There was that word again. It was such a foreign word coming from Louis' mouth, and I noticed that anytime he said it, his vulnerability would show through. It showed everything he was trying to hide behind- every emotion in those stone cold eyes.

I nodded slowly, watching as Louis' face broke into a smile, the biggest one I've seen from him. He seemed happier than a kid in a candy store, or Niall when his football team wins a match. His smile was literally like sunshine. His eyes shone and small crinkles appeared beside them. It was such an attractive look on him.

I was a bit taken aback when he leaned in again and pressed his lips to mine, this kiss being much slower than any of the ones we've shared. I managed to kiss him back, reveling in the feeling of his lips on mine; letting the feeling wash over me and overtake all of my senses.

"Great!" He finally said as he pulled back, and I only laughed a bit at his enthusiasm.  
***************************

I woke up the next morning feeling better than I ever have before. I actually felt full of life, and not like I was being held captive. Yes, I did sleep alone last night, but that was only because this whole thing kind of scared me. I was very into Louis, but how would people react to this? This was far from a typical hostage- kidnapper situation.

I made my way down the hall and saw that nobody was awake yet. I wish that I had someone to talk to right now because I feel great, but I would just have to busy myself for a while. I decided that I could make breakfast, but I would have to see what they had to make.

I walked over to the refrigerator and pulled it open. There wasn't much, but I could make some scrambled eggs and sausage. I grabbed all of the stuff I needed and almost dropped it all in shock when I turned and saw Zayn standing there. "Jesus, you scared me." I said and he chuckled.

We both grew silent as I put everything down on the counter. I just didn't exactly know what to say to Zayn. I kissed him, but I didn't like him that way. Sure, Zayn was beautiful, you'd have to be blind to not see that, but I only ever thought of Louis. He was always in my head, eating at my thoughts like a virus. Always on my mind, and I wasn't complaining.

"Listen, Zayn, I'm sorry about-" I began, but I was instantly cut off by him.

"Don't apologize, Harry. You really don't have to. It's not like I didn't want to kiss you this whole time." He commented, and I tried so hard not to blush. I knew that Zayn wanted to, but I just felt a bit ashamed for only kissing him in rage and not the lust he probably felt.

"That's exactly why I'm apologizing though. I took advantage of your weakness because I knew that you did. I just feel so ashamed because I was just pissed off at Louis. I honestly think that you should probably be upset with me right now." I said. Why shouldn't he? I basically used him in my time.of anger as a way to sort of 'get back' at Louis.

"Well, I'm not." Zayn stated, and I really wanted him to be. I know that I couldn't blame him if he was upset. "It would be stupid to be upset when I got what I wanted." He said as he smirked at me. I blushed a bit before I spoke again.

"Yes, but-" I was cut off as Zayn stepped towards me and his lips connected to mine. I froze, not kissing back at all and Zayn noticed. He pulled back with a chuckle and said "Well that made you shut up. Now, what are you making?" He asked. I was a bit too shocked to answer right away, but I finally did.

"Um, scrambled eggs and sausage for everyone." I announced and he raised eyebrows. He didn't respond or say anything for a while and it made me feel a bit self-conscious. "What?" I asked.

"Nothing. It's a bit weird how you're going to cook and feed your kidnappers." He said. I couldn't argue there because he was right. I was basically showing kindness to the people who shouldn't have shown me any. But they did. They each did in their own ways.

Liam was like a second best friend, Niall being irreplaceable. He was my support at the beginning of this whole thing and he was always reassuring me that things would be okay. Zayn made sure my cut was okay and opened up a bit, showing that he wasn't just a really attractive jerk. He let me understand why he was the way he was, although I never heard his whole story. And then there was Louis.

Louis. Where do I even start? Yes, he caused me pain. Hell, he even slapped me and stabbed my hand, but I saw something more in him. He wasn't just this heartless, money-loving kidnapper. I knew that there had to be a past to explain why and how Louis got here in life. Even though he was cruel at times, he also showed me vulnerability and fondness. My heart soared whenever I saw him or heard his voice and I longed for his touched almost all the time. He was addictive and maybe it wasn't right, but he made me smile. I remember how much it hurt to feel ignored and resented by him. Painful.

"Harry?" Zayn asked, and I snapped out of my thoughts as he chuckled at me, realizing I didn't hear a word he probably said to me. I was way too caught up in my thoughts of Louis- always Louis.

"I asked if you needed any help cooking. I could help out a bit." He offered, and I smiled, thanking him as I nodded. This was the type of kindness that I was talking about. He didn't have to help, but if he wanted to, I would let him.

"If you want, sure. Can you mix the eggs up to scramble?" I asked him, and he nodded. He grabbed the eggs away from me and then began to crack them and pour the insides in a bowl. He also grabbed a fork and began to mix them up, but I noticed him leaving the yolks untouched.

I laughed a bit and he stopped as he looked up at me and raised an eyebrow. "Something funny?" I nodded a bit before taking the bowl and fork from him and saying "You actually have to break the yolks unless you want strange and lump scrambled eggs." I said.

"Okay, Chef Styles. Obviously you are much wiser than I am in all of this. But even you make mistakes." He said. I looked up at him and was about to say that I know I do. I was never one to be arrogant, and I kind of think I just came off as that. Also, I didn't think I was perfect anyways, but then Zayn dipped his finger in the egg yolk and wiped some on my face.

"Zayn!" I yelled, feeling the cold and sticky egg on my face. He lost it in laughs, and I groaned, wiping it off with a napkin. "It's not funny!" I cried, but he shook his head and said "But it is!"

I watched as he was laughing so hard he couldn't breathe properly. That's when the plan for revenge came to mind. I grinned mischievously before I grabbed the fork out of the bowl and wiped it onto his cheek. He instantly stopped laughing and yelled "What the fuck, Harry?" I laughed this time, and Zayn glared at me.

"You're gonna get it." And that was when we started throwing eggs at each other, making the kitchen quite a mess. I hit Zayn more times, so I guess I won, but we never finished the little war as Louis walked into the kitchen and saw us. We both froze, terrified of Louis' wrath at the mess, but he didn't say a word.

He looked at me, then he looked at Zayn, and then back to me again before he nodded and turned, walking out of the kitchen. Everything was eerily quiet. Zayn and I stood there, in the midst of a egg shell covered floor with yolk splashed all over the place. I was about to speak when we both jumped when we heard a loud crash, followed by Louis yelling in rage.

My eyes widened, and I didn't know if what I was doing was safe, but I needed to check on him and see if he's okay. I took a step forward and Zayn caught my arm. "What are you doing?" He asked me, and I saw the caution in his eyes, the fear for me, but I trusted Louis. I knew he could hurt me, but I trusted Louis. It was quite strange, but I felt like he didn't just say what he said yesterday for no reason.

"I'll be fine." I said before I freed my arm from his hold and then walked out of the messy kitchen. I knew that I would clean it up. I didn't understand why Louis was so upset about it, but I would fix it immediately. I'd clean the whole place if Louis wanted me to.

I walked up to his bedroom door and heard a pound on the wall, knowing that he was probably punching it, just like I had. I pushed the door open and he instantly turned around and looked at me. I was speechless at first, just staring right back at him before my eyes began to inspect the room.

His lamp was broken on the floor, that must've been the crash Zayn and I heard. There was a progressive hole in the wall from where he had been punching it, repeatedly it seems. I didn't know what to say, so I just apologized.

"I'm sorry about the kitchen, Louis. I'll clean it all up. I promise." I said, feeling like a small child. Louis shook his head and walked over to me, closing the door before he turned back to face me. The look on his face was unreadable, but then he spoke and let me understand what was going on in his head.

"It's not the damn kitchen that makes me upset. I couldn't care less about it. It's you. You with Zayn. Acting all friendly." He said, and I knew that he was worried about that. I kissed Zayn and he saw it happen. Of course, I told him why, but it must still get to him. I can only imagine him kissing someone else. It made me feel sick.

"We were just messing around. Zayn's just a friend. He offered to help me cook, and I told him he wasn't doing it right, that's how that started." I explained, but Louis shook his head again and walked up to me. His face was so close to mine, and I closed my eyes as he leaned his forehead against mine. I felt his breath on my lips as he spoke and wanted to kiss him so badly.

"I need to know that nothing is going on with you and Zayn. Or you and Liam. I need to know that you like me just as I like you. I need to know that you care, Harry. I need to know you're mine." He said i n a whisper, and every word sent shivers down my spine. I didn't understand Louis' insecurities because he was so beautiful, but if he needed the reassurance, I'll give it to him.

"Nothing is going on between Zayn and I. Or Liam and I. I do like you, Louis. I don't think I ever did a great deal at hiding that. I'm yours." I whispered back, and my wish was granted as Louis' lips were pressed to mine. The kiss was a bit rough, almost like a possessive kiss, but I enjoyed it. It sent a rush throughout my body.

I gasped as Louis pushed me against the door and his lips trailed down my neck. His lips were so warm against my neck and I felt him begin to mark me, making me fist his shirt in my hands and lightly breathe out his name. He had such an incredible hold over me, and I was so glad that I got to feel his lips on me all over again- the fighting and avoiding each other being too much for me to handle before.

He pulled back and smirked down at his creation on my neck. "Mine." He growled before kissing me again. I happily kissed him back, enjoying the fact that he was interested in me as well, and we weren't just lying and hiding our feelings anymore because I have no idea how much longer I would have lasted if I had to hold it all in.

He pulled away again and said "I just want you for myself. Maybe Zayn and Liam could go out today and we could just... hang." I had to admit, the idea made me feel so hopeful. I really wanted to spend time with Louis, just to get a glimpse at the real him, the him he is without Liam and Zayn. The him that comes without the ransoms and kidnapping. It was weird to feel this way, but it seems normal to me now.

"Could we?" I asked, full of hope. I really wanted this right now because just the thought of having more Louis time made me want to jump for joy.

Louis never responded, just called out for Zayn and Liam to both come into his room real quick. He stepped away from me, but I stayed in my spot, not believing that this was happening. It made me feel both excited and fearful. Excited because I would finally get more of Louis, and fearful because we've just been alone. What were we supposed to even do? Fearful because I was already doing something wrong- falling for my kidnapper- and I didn't want to fall anymore. I've never even been interested in anyone, but with Louis it was an instant attraction that was quickly becoming more.

Liam and Zaym both entered Louis' room with confused faces. They didn't ask anything, just waited for Louis to speak, which he did. "I need you both to do me a favor and go out today. Take time off and maybe sleep at a hotel." He said. Their faces both had shock on them, but Zayn's held a bit of hurt as Liam's held a bit of worry. It confused me, but I let it slide because the thought of Louis was too distracting.

"But what if something happens." Zayn said. "What if you need us here because-"

"What is going to happen, Zayn?" Louis asked in a testy voice, and Zayn stuttered a bit before sighing and giving up. "That's what I thought. Please just go." Louis said, saying the last sentence in a much kinder voice.

It was Liam who responded first. "Okay. We'll go. Right, Zayn?" He asked. I looked at Zayn, as did Liam and Louis. He seemed hesitant to leave, but finally nodded, sharing eye contact with me. "C'mon." Liam pulled him by his arm and he turned and left.

"Have fun you two." Liam said, always reading into what we truly wanted- alone time. Liam was just very bright and insightful. He always knew the underlying message of things. He even knew that I was attracted to Louis before anyone else. He knew, just like he knows now that Louis wants alone time.

Louis shut the door after they both left, the front door being shut and we stood in silence as we heard the car engine start and then got further into the distance. Finally, Louis smiled at me and asked "So what do you wanna do?"  
\----------------------------------------------

ZAYN

I know I shouldn't feel jealous of Louis being with Harry because Harry always seemed attracted to Louis anyways, but after that kiss, my head was a mess. I know he only did it because he was made at Louis, but a part of me wanted it to mean more.

I heard Louis and him talking that day, after he asked Harry to go to his room and told me to stay away from him. I heard him speak to Harry in a way I've never heard him speak to anyone. He spoke to him with caution, care, hope, emotion.

Louis is always so emotionless, but Harry seemed to bring out another side of him besides that familiar anger. That was one of the reasons I knew that I should let this go. Louis never acted this way, and I had a feeling Harry was the only way to make Louis see that he doesn't always have to be so cold.

I have no idea if I am right or not, but I can possibly see Louis falling hard for Harry, which will only complicate this whole ransom. He'll eventually not want to let Harry go. And if we do get caught, what will Louis do? Surely Harry's parents wouldn't approve of him dating his kidnapper. Not like he could visit him in jail every second of everyday.

"They'll be fine. I know it." Liam said out of nowhere, and I looked at him, not even shocked that he knew my worries. That's just how Liam is. He was very observant, and he's probably thought of the same things. Liam was always one step ahead of me and everyone else.

"How do you know?" I asked him. Liam gave a small smile, quite a stunning smile if you asked me. He parked the car and I saw that we were outside of a hotel, probably where we would be spending the night later.

"Call me crazy, but I think that they are sort of meant for each other." He said. "Now let's get some rooms so we have somewhere to stay tonight." He got out of the car and waited for me outside of the building.

I sat there, thinking about what he said, and I had to admit that I did have that feeling as well. Harry and Louis seemed drawn to each other. Maybe they would be fine.


	13. Time Alone

HARRY

"I think we're done." Louis announced. We were busy cleaning up the kitchen from the mess Zayn and I made. Everything was so peaceful when I knew it was only Louis and I. The thing is, I'm a bit scared to fall deeper. Falling for Louis would be like rendering myself a prisoner for life. But Louis didn't treat me like a prisoner. He used to, but now he gave me freedoms.

"Are you sure? I mean, I could sweep again, or maybe mop the floor. And if it's needed, I'll clean every room in this house-" I was interrupeted by Louis walking over to me and pressing his warm lips against mine. I kissed back, inhaling his scent and reveling in the toxicating feeling he gave me.

He finaly broke apart and gave me a pointed look. "It's fine, Harry. Now let's do something else." We set the broom and the dust pan back in the corner of the kitchen and then I followed along as Louis pulled me by my hand to the living room. The slight skin on skin contact made me feel major butterflies in my stomach.

"Sit." He said as he pointed to the couch. I sat down and then he began to speak. "We could play a video game, Liam has lots of those. We could also watch a movie, the classic thing to do on a lazy day. We could-" I interrupted him, liking the second idea.

"A movie sounds good." I said. Truth be told, I only wanted to lie down with Louis and snuggle while watching a movie. It sounded like the perfect thing a couple would do. Although, I'm not sure we're even a couple. Louis never verified or denied that. He told me that he wanted me to be his, but that could be taken different ways.

He could mean that he wants me to only kiss him and nobody else. He could mean that he wants me to only be around him. He could mean that he's the only one that gets to touch me the way he does. Or he could mean that he actually wanted me, not for sex and not for pleasure, but me as a whole. He could mean that he actually liked me and wanted the normal kind of relationship people have. Boyfriends.

The thought seemed so absurd to me. I'm sure Louis was just very possessive and wanted to make sure that I 'belonged' to him. I mean, it would be most understandable. Louis had all the power in this place, and I'm certain he'd want to tackle every single opportunity to show that power. But then why did his words feel so sincere? Why did they seem to have a deeper meaning to them? Why did I feel like he wanted exactly what I wanted?

"A movie it is then." He said. He turned around and searched through the cabinets. "How do you feel about scary movies?" He asked, as he held up a movie called Dead Silence over his shoulder. To be honest, I was never a big fan of scary movies. I doubt anyone would be when they lived in a house as big as mine. You never know what could've been around the corner.

"They're fine." I replied, thankful that he wasn't staring at me because my face probably would've said the opposite. I would always be terrified on the inside, but that was because Niall wasn't one for scary movies, yet we watched them anyways. I acted like they didn't effect me, and I guess that made Niall feel better. It was our typical routine and it made me feel needed.

"Let's get this started." Louis said as he sat down on the couch beside me with a blanket. I was wondering when he had left to get it, but those thoughts flew away once he wrapped it around me and held my close to him. My heart beat picked up, and I hoped Louis didn't notice, but luck wasn't on my side.

"Calm down, Harry." He chuckled. "The movie didn't even start yet." He kissed my cheek, sending butterflies through my stomach. This was a different side to Louis, a gentle side, and I have to say that I quite enjoyed it. I enjoyed the soft touch of his lips on my cheek and the flutter I felt from his eyelashes on the side of my face. I enjoyed the way he pulled me in closer, eventhough I was already pretty close. I enjoyed his warmth, the way it made me feel warm all the way to my core. Louis was just like a teddy bear right now. "Loubear" I thought to myself, and tried to refrain my blushing.

Louis was looking at the screen, but I was looking at Louis. I loved the way his eyes lit up when something fascinated him om the screen. I loved the way he was fully involved in the movie, as if he was a part of the story himself, and I guess he was in a way because what's a movie without an audience to care about the story?

I finally turned to the screen and looked away again, not enjoying the horrific death scene I just saw. The thing about this movie was that the killer was in the form of the puppets she made. The killer wasn't the most terrifying part- it was the puppet. The dummy was basically alive and I just felt so uneasy about inanimate objects moving and having minds of their owns. My mum collected too many dolls for me to not think about the possibilities.

"What are you thinking about?" Louis asked me. I realized that my eyes turned back to the screen, but Louis' drifted to the side of my face. He was watching me this time, and I felt the admiration in his stare. It made me fall a little nore for him.

"Um, just my mum." I said, speaking softly. I didn't want to set Louis off, especially because I was alone and didn't really want to handle his rage without Liam amd Zayn here. I knew that the topic of my home, or anyone associated with my life, was something that made him tick, but this time was different.

I don't know if it was because we were alone and Louis felt like his guard didn't need to be up, or if he was just harboring his anger deep down inside, but Louis only kissed my hair and then nuzzled his nose in my neck as he asked "Do you miss her?"

I swallowed thickly, a bit nervous to answer honestly. How could I not miss my mum? She was the woman who raised me to be the person I am today. She taught me mainly everything I know. She was always there when I needed her, never getting mad at me no matter how tired she was. She was my mum, and I loved her.

I nodded slowly, and Louis let out a sigh. His hand lifted up my shirt a bit, allowing his thumb to trail circles on my hip. "Wanna talk about what you were thinking?" He asked. I didn't want to just keep it in now because this was probably the only time Louis would ever allow me to speak of something that relates to home.

"Well, she had this collection of dolls. I mean, she still has it, but I was terrified of them when I was little." I said with a small chuckle. I heard Louis let out a small laugh as well, and it warmed my heart. "I would watch these movies about killer toys and dolls and it absolutely scared me. One night, when Niall was sleeping over," I felt Louis stiffen a bit at the mention of Niall, and I expected him to rage now, but he let me continue after he took a deep breath and let it out. "we decided to do an investigation. When my mum and dad were asleep, we snuck out of my room and went to where my mum kept her dolls. We peeked through the door and then crawled under the bed that was in the room. We stayed there all night, watching and filming the dolls. We ended up falling asleep, and my mum was so scared when she couldn't find us the next morning. Our little antics were the best. I guess inanimate objects have always freaked me out since then." I confessed, and Louis nodded.

"So this movie isn't the best to watch?" He asked, looking into my eyes. Typically, I would nod because the fact that the dummies moved made my skin crawl in a very wrong way, but it didn't bother me so much this time around. I remembered that I was currently in Louis' embrace and that also helped me out in the situation. Nothing felt creepy or dangerous. I felt like nothing could harm me.

"No, it's okay this time." I said, and he raised an eyebrow at me, a very handsome smile appearing on his face. He seemed amused as he asked, "And why is this time any different?"

I looked down at Louis's shirt, suddenly finding thr fabric quite interesting as I played with it between my fingers. I closed my eyes for a bit, feeling nothing but Louis. His thumb still creating circles on my hip. All I could hear was the steady sound of Louis' breathing. He would always breathe in everytime I breathed out, and out when I breathed in. All I could feel was Louis. I felt his warmth, his skin, his hair against my face. I opened my eyes and all I could see was Louis. His amazing blue eyes, his soft fringe that was sonetimes styled up in a quiff, and his soft smile as he stared down at me. And I had to tell the truth.

"Because you're here. I feel safe with you." It was weird. It was a twisted sentence, given the positions we were in. It wasn't a normal coupley thing, but I was really falling for Louis. It was only true. It's better to admit it to myself than to deny it and wonder why I dread going home in the back of my mind.

It was a split second before Louis pressed his lips to mine, and then, all I could taste was Louis.  
******************************

"See, those movies weren't so bad." Louis commented once we finished the last one. It was a straight scary movie marathon, which Louis loved. I wasn't as into it, but I did quite enjoy the benefit of having Louis' arms wrapped around me, squeezing me closer when I got scared. I never had anyone fo that. I always acted like the tough one that comforted everyone else.

We watched Dead Silence, then the movie IT, which gave me my phobia of clowns when I was little, and then all three of the Insidious movies. Surprisingly, I wasn't thats cared when they were all over. The only thing on my mind was Louis. Always seemed to be Louis.

"Where they?" He asked, and I shook my head. I looked up at him and he smirked at me. "You sure you weren't scared? Must've been considering the death grip you have on my hand right now." He said. I was confused until I looked at our hands and realized that I was squeezing his. I just reveled in the warmth and softness of it.

I blushed a bit as I let go of Louis' hand, and he chuckled. "You know, Harry, you're something different." Louis said, and I had no idea which way to take that. It could go as a compliment or as a polite way to insult someone.

"Is that a good thing?" I asked quietly, looking down at the blanket that laid on top of us. Louis lifted my chin up and nodded.

"It's a very good thing." He said before he leaned in and our lips met. I instantly closed my eyes, my senses being washed over with Louis. He was everything to me right now, and all the details about our situation seemed to disperse and drift away. As if they weren't even a part of the reality we were currently in.

The kiss began as something so innocent, but that all changed in a second. Louis' tongue proded my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth, but instead of shoving his tongue in, he traced my lios with his tongue. It sent a shiver up my spine, and then he finally tongue kissed me.

I didn't even fight for dominance, knowing that Louis made me too weak to try. Instead, I let him take control, which he was so very good at. He just knew what to do, and I knew how to let him.

"I like you, Harry. So much." He said as his lips left mine and began to press fluttering kisses down my neck, never staying in one spot for too long. I breathed in shakily and then whispered "I like you, too, Louis." The thing was, I was afraid I liked Louis a lot more than I think I do.

I gasped when Louis' lips latched onto my sweet spot, right on the area between my shoulder and my neck. He began to suck lightly, and I clung onto him, feeling the pleasure he was giving me run through me and between my legs, making me hard already.

"Off." Louis said in a panting breath as his fingers ran up my shirt and lifted it quickly. I felt his lips disappear from my skin and then the cold air took over as he pulled my shirt off of my head and then threw it onto the ground. The cool air only lasted a second before it was replaced by the warm and tingly pleasure that Louis' lips offered. He kissed down my chest, pushing me back on the couch until I was laying down across it.

His fingers played with my zipper, funbling over the button before his fingers slowly moved even lower and he teasingly traced the hard bulge that was prominent in my jeans. I closed my eyes, throwing my head back onto the couch's arm at the intense bliss and moaned out Louis' name.

"Fuck, babe." Louis cursed before he took his shirt off as well, my jeans following right after. Then, Louis fingers were playing with the waistband to my boxers. I was already panting, feeling in need of any sort of contact with my obvious boner. I was basically desperate for it.

"So ready for me, Harry." Louis said in such a sexy voice that I let out another moan. He smirked down at me before he stood up and took his pants off as well. He held his hand out to me and asked "Shall we take this to my room?" We could've, and it probably would have been the decent thing to do, considering that Liam and Zayn sat on this couch as well, but I just wanted Louis now.

I sat up, but pulled Louis down again, pressing my lips to his in a bruising kiss. I wanted to show him just how much I wanted this. It's been a while since I've felt his skin on mine, since I've felt his lips littered all over my body, since I've felt the trace of his fingerprints still on me afterwards, since I've felt Louis in me.

I managed to get on top of Louis, straddling his hips, and it took a bit of courage to gently rock my hip against his, both of us moaning at the friction. Louis broke the kiss and threw his head back as he whispered "Fuck, Haz. So damn hot."

I continued to move my hips against his, both of our members perking up even more from the contact they were receiving. I got up a bit and then pulled my boxers off of myself, hearing Louis' stuggled whimper as he watched, his lip between his teeth in anticipation.

I sat back down and rocked out hips together again, the sensation being increased by such a massive amount, and I could tell Louis felt it, too because of his reaction to it all.

He let out a growl as he pushed me back, laying me down again, and he climbed over me. He connected our lips in a messy kiss, all tongue and teeth, all want and need, all desperation and anticipation, ready for what was to come.

Without any warning, I felt one finger enter me, and that familiar sting went through me, making me stop all actions for a moment. "You okay?" Louis asked, and I nodded. I think that was the first time he's even stopped to see if I was okay with the pace. I mean, I always was, but it was a nice change.

I pulled him down into a kiss and Louis kissed back before pumping his finger in and out of me. The feeling was so familiar, and soon I was ready for another one to join in, which I guess Louis understood. He had two fingers in me and he pushed them into me a few times before I saw stars. "Again." I begged.

Louis moved his fingers the same way, hitting my prostate and making me mewl out. "That good?" Louis asked, and I nodded. Louis added another finger, but I didn't need anymore stretching out. I just wanted to feel him already.

"Please, Louis." I moaned and he smirked, knowing that I was a withering and hopeless mess underneath him. "Yes, Harry?" He teased, and it sorr of pissed me off. I have never been sexually frustrated before, but I wanted Louis, and I wanted him so badly.

"Fuck me!" I ordered, and Louis smirked again as he pulled his fingers out and took his boxers off, positioning himself at my entrance. "With pleasure." He commented before he pushed into me, never stopping. I felt myself stretch around him and the sensation was painful and pleasurable. Bittersweet.

"God," Louis groaned against my neck," so fucking tight, Harry. You have no idea how insane I was going not being able to touch you like this." he said as his hands traveled down my chest and then took my member into his hand. He slowly pumped me and I bit my lip, trying to keep quiet. "You have no idea how much I wanted to kiss you like this." He said as he kissed me quickly, his lips being so intoxicating. He then kissed down my neck and then his lips went to my nipple, his tongue flicking out against the bud and making my back arch, one hand moving under my back.

"God, Harry. I've missed fucking into your tight little hole, just giving you everything as you take it all without complaining." He said, giving a few harsh thrusts, and I couldn't contain my pleasure anymore. My lips parted and I let out a yell out his name. His eyes closed, as if my yelling gave him total and complete ecstacy.

"I've missed that. You screaming my name helplessly." He said, and kissed along my jawline. "But, you know, in that movie we watched, you weren't supposed to yell. Think you can handle that, princess?" He asked, and I nodded. I nodded, but I had no idea if I could. I've only had sex with Louis a few times, but I already knew I was noisy during sex. Still, I would try if Louis wanted me to.

"We'll see." He smirked before he adjusted his hips and pushed into me roughly, hitting my prostate and I knew he did it on purpose. He probably had this planned. I bit my lip, trying so hard not to yell. I made weird little noises in the back of my throat as I tried to contain it all, and Louis' face showed pure amusement.

"You okay, Harry?" He asked again, but I knew this time he said it in a teasing way. I didn't want to just nod, I wanted to give him a verbal response. I wanted to show that I could speak and contain a yell while doing so.

"Y-y-yes." I stuttered out, and Louis groaned as he pushed into me again, hitting that same spot. I gave out strangled whimpers, trying not to yell and trying to hold myself together. It was so much and it was so hard.

"You're doing so good, babe. Fuck." Louis moaned and that was all it took before I came, not being able to stop the scream that escaped my throat of Louis' name.

That led to Louis cuming deep inside of me. He rode out his high, and I closed my eyes, feeling all of my energy dissapate. "You did so good." Louis said, kissing my lips as he pulled out. I winced a bit, but then felt warm all over as Louis laid beside me, both of us on our sides and facing each other on the couch.

He held my close and said "You can sleep now." I nodded, already getting there. My eyes were too heavy to keep open. I snuggled into Louis' chest and closed my eyes, letting sleep take over as I whispered "This was the best day ever."


	14. Like or Not

LOUIS

"Stop it! Stop it!" I heard the constant, yelling. I covered my ears, trying to block out every smack, every cry. I felt the tears stringing my eyes, but I never wiped them away, too afraid to remove my hands from my ears. I didn't want to be sucked into the violence around me.

"FUCK YOU! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! YOURS AND LOUIS!" He yelled, louder than ever before, and I flinched. My hands couldn't block out the noise. They weren't soundproof, and neither were the walls. How I wished they were.

"NO!" I heard another cry and then I was jumping out of my bed. I ran to my door and opened it, light flooding through and filling my room. I blinked a bit, getting accustomed to the light after having been in the darkness for a while.

I alnost took a step out of my room when a voice that chilled me to the bone growled "Get back in your fucking room, NOW!" I froze, slowly turning and seeing nothing but two shadows, but I knew who the people were. One was on the ground, broken and bruised, and the other was standing- all the power inside of their palms.

"Wh-what's going on?" I asked, stuttering up my words. I was absolutely terrified and mortified. "Tell him it's okay." The voice said. No reply, nothing, silence. Then, louder, rougher. "TELL HIM IT'S OKAY!" I heard, and I cringed back in fear at the authority.

"Louis, i-it's okay. Go back to your room." I heard, and I whimpered. I didn't believe it was okay, but what could I do? I nodded, turning around and walking into my room before I heard it- the one sound that changed my life. Took the person I cared about away. I opened the door and ran into the hallway, but then it all faded to black.

I was shaking when I woke up. Terrified as my eyes scanned the room around me. I was in a panic, wondering where I was and what happened. My heart was pounding, until I felt a softness against my arm. Strangely, it calmed me down and I turned to see Harry's hair against my arm.

I calmed down, looking at the beautiful boy that lay beside me. He was snuggled up close to me, dressed in absolutely nothing at all, but he looked so innocent. My heart warmed, something that I haven't felt in a long time. I haven't cared for someone this much in a long time, and, to be honest, it scared the hell out of me.

I don't know what Zayn and Liam thought, I don't know what the public will think if we get caught, and I sure don't know what Harry thinks, but he's way more than just a toy to me. I just don't know if I should show how much I care for him. What if that pushed him away? What if he only wants the sex? What if he would just want to go home?

Harry's twitched a bit in his sleep, and I felt his arm wrap around mine. His head shifted down, his curls also touching my arm, and I felt tears want to spill. I hated crying. I hated showing emotions, but Harry brought them out. He made me care.

I looked down at him, feeling my heart swell with emotions. He was the only thing that made me feel something other than this anger that has consumed my life since that day. I wanted to protect him, but I was hurting him in a way. I was keeping him here, keeping him from his family. For money.

No, it started out for money, but now it's more than that. I remember the first day I saw Harry. I saw a beautiful boy being pinned against the wall by Zayn. I felt my blood boil at that scene in front of me, but I had no idea why back then. I know now. Zayn touched what was mine. Harry was mine, even if he wanted someone else, I'd let him love them, but my heart would never let him go.

Harry stirred a bit, and I decided that the couch was so uncomfortable. He deserved someplace nice and soft. Not his room. That room probably reminded him of those dark nights he spent alone when he first got here. No, he deserves a bed for a king.

I got up from the couch, slowly slipping my arm free from Harry's grasp and immediantly missing his touch. It didn't last long as I slowly slipped my hands underneath Harry, holding him around his neck and underneath his knees. I gently lifted him from the couch, trying my best not to wake him.

My heart swelled a bit as his head lolled to lean against my chest and he let out a small mumble of my name. Just one simple "Louis" escaped his lips, and it didn't seem like a frightened mumble or even a trapped one. He didn't seem like he was trying to run away in the dream. So, what was he dreaming of?

It didn't matter. All I know was that Harry meant something to me. But how could I ever let him know that? That would be so wrong to tell. Who's ever heard of a kidnapper falling for his victim? I'd have to be the worst kidnapper ever. Although, technically Liam and Zayn did the kidnapping. That wouldn't matter in court though. I was just as guilty, if not more.

I made my way down the hallway and all the way to my room. It took me a second to finally get the door opened, but I succeeded. I made my way to my bed, setting Harry down like a small, innocent child. I laid down beside him and couldn't help the small smile that played on my lips as he rolled over and his hands clung into my shirt. It was pure adorableness.

I quickly wiped the smile off of my face as soon as I realized that it was there. I couldn't let myself get to attached to Harry like this. It was not only peculiar, but it was dangerous for me and for him. So many things could happen and so many things could go wrong.

I promised myself before to keep Harry on the chain but never pull it in, yet that seemed impossible now. I wanted him, almost needed him, closer to me. It was like he made things better and removed the dark marks of my past, but he couldn't know that. That could be the very weapon he used against me, and I would have to be completely stupid to give him a weapon.

I had to remember, constantly remind myself, you can act nicer to him, but always make sure he knows why he's here. Even if it hurts me as well. He needs to be reminded that this isn't some little relationship. I'm his kidnapper and he's the hostage. The thing that would kill me to lie about worse than this is the sex.

The thing is, it started out as pure lust. I don't know why nobody's ever taken him before because he's so damn beautiful. I just couldn't control myself that night, and it made my head spin when he desperately wanted the same thing. Yes, it started out just for pleasure, but now it's becoming something more.

I thought back on tonight, how great it felt just to be inside of Harry, but the position on the couch made it even better. The small space that pressed our bodies togetger more got things even more heated than usual. The way that Harry was too desperate to even move to the bedroom made me crave every inch of him. And that's when I noticed my mistake.

I was gentle with him, if only for a second. I showed how much I cared tonight, and that was dangerous to do. I didn't want Harry to know the type of hold be was gaining over me. I needed him to think I was in charge of everything, eventhough I felt myself slipping in his clutches.

I looked down at him again, seeing how beautiful and peaceful he looked. I ran my hand through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes before I decided that maybe it would be okay. It wouldn't hurt to let him in a bit- would it? Yes, it would.  
******************************

I groaned as my phone just kept on ringing. Who in their right mind would call me at this time? They might wake Harry up! On that thought, I quickly opened my eyes and rolled over on the bed, looking around for my phone and finding it on the nightstand.

I picked it up, answering it without looking at the caller ID. "Hello?" I asked into the phone, feeling Harry move around a bit in the bed, and I rolled onto my back to admire his peaceful sleeping figure. His hair was strayed along his face and I brushed it out of his face, not even knowing I was smiling until he let out a small breath through his lips. I quickly stopped smiling and waiting for the person to speak.

"When can we come back, Lou? Still busy with Harry?" It was Zayn. To be honest, I didn't really want them to come back yet, but I knee it was probably best. The longer they were gone, the closer I got to Harry. The more I fell, the harder this whole ransom will be.

"You can come back in an hour." I said. Why did I say that? They could come back now, but the words never left my lips. I let what I said stand, and Zayn said his okay before hanging up. He seemed a bit rushed, as if he wanted to come back now. I knew that he was keen on Harry, I also knew Liam was, but Zayn was a bigger threat. I knew Liam was much too polite and shy to act, but Zayn was a whole other persona.

I didn't know I had gathered Harry against my chest, but I did notice the warmth there. Right before I was going to move him, I noticed his eyes slowly flutter open. He laid still for a while before lifting his head and looking up at me. I let out a small breath as he gave me a small smile.

"Good morning." He said, his morning voice sounded low and rough. To be honest, it was such a turn on. I ignored that fact for a bit, focusing simply on how beautiful he looked in the morning light. The way the light broke through the slightly opened blinds and lit up his skin and hair made him look angelic. His eyes were full of such wonder and hope in them that ir was almost ironic, considering where he was as of now.

"Good morning, love." I said, immediately cursing at myself in my head for using the pet name. It was yet another sign of affection that I could have warded off, had I though of my words previously to mouthing them aloud. That was the thing. When it came to Harry, my natural instinct took over. I wasn't angry at the world, and I just let myself and my thoughts be. It was like I had no control over my words and actions.

Speaking of that, I found myself leaning in and capturing his perfect pink lips with my own. They were so addictive and consuming. I think I could honestly stay here all day, kissing and holding Harry. But, we only had an hour to ourselves.

I raised my hands to his cheeks and pulled him further to me, kissing him harsher, reminding him who was in charge and who wasn't. I had to keep him in check, as well as myself. I needed to show that, eventhough what happened last nigjt happened, that's not how it's gonna be. It can't be that way.

I sat up, Harry rising as well as our lips never split apart from one anothers. I positioned him so he was stradling my hips and I felt myself stiffen a bit as the way his fingers began to softly tug at the ends of my hair. I needed him, and I needed him now.

It amazed me that no matter how many times I got him, I still needed more. I got onto my knees, lifting Harry up and then trailing my fingers against his sides as I laid him down onto the bed beneath me. My hands began to travel lower down to his body until I reached his v-line. I traced the very prominant lines and listened as Harry let out a gasp in my ear as I kissed down his neck.

I brought my hands down to Harry's knees and marveled at the way that his thighs easily fell open, giving me total access to the beautiful boy beneath me. His body was simply amazing. His skin was pale and beautiful, the way his hair- even messy from last night- perfectly framed his eyes and head, and the way his eyes were full of lust and trust.

I sat inbetween his legs and then kissed down his chest, coming down and around his hardening member to his thighs. I trailed kisses down the backs of his legs to his v-line, loving Harry's constant moans and whimpers of pleasure.

"Louis." He gasped as I took his member in my hand and began to pump him. My thoughts were originally to be rough and show Harry that even though last night was gentler than before, it wouldn't always be that way. This was my moment to reassert my authority over him and over the household, but my words and actions betrayed me.

"So beautiful." I whispered as my lips met his thighs again and began to press soft, flutter-like kisses on the insides of them. Harry's hand came up to grasp my hair and I could tell he was feeling intense pleasure from how his legs began to shake. I didn't want it to end yet, though.

I stopped my actions, Harry giving a small whine of protest. I climbed up so that we were face to face again and pressed my lips to his in a chaste kiss. Harry tried to hold me there, but I pulled back before his arms encircled my neck. "Do you want this, Harry?" I asked, teasingly trailing my fingers up him legs and positioning my tip at his entrance. It took all my willpower not to immediantly push into his warmth.

He moaned out against my shouler and said "Yes, Louis. Yes. Please!" He pushed down onto me, causing me to prod his entrance and making both of us moan out. I held his hips down and said "Fuck, Harry. So tight, baby." as I began to push into him.

"Lou- Louis." Harry groaned as I bottomed out inside of him. He looked so good underneath me, his skin slowly beginning to glisten with sweat at how hot it was getting in here. He felt amazing to be inside of. He was so warm and tight, and I always loved the fact that I'm the only one who has touched him this way. It binded us in a way.

Harry clung to me, fingernails.deliciously digging into my skin. I usedbone hand to hood myself up and then the other wrapped around his member, feeding him even more pleasure. I at least wanted to finisb and shower before Zayn and Liam came back. They didn't get to see Harry wrecked like this. It was for my eyes only.

At that thought, I gave up all kind of softness and pounded into him, abusing his hole. He gave out a very pornographic shriek, sounding very close to a moan, and it encouraged me even more. I didn't even have to look for Harry's prostate, already knowing where it was. I knew how to make him feel good, and I enjoyed that power and ability.

I pumped him in time with my thrusts, until I felt his body shaking from all the pleasure and he came shouting my name. His body pressed to mine, and I helped him through his high as I also came from the marvelous new feeling of his tightened walls.

I immediantly pulled out, thoughts of lying beside him and cuddling fill my mind, but we couldn't be like that. Authority, Louis! "Stay here." I said as I got off of the bed and went into the restroom to grab a small washcloth and clean off Harry's cum from both of us.

"Shower." I ordered. Confusion filled Harry's eyes, probably from going back to using my old emotionless and authoritive voice, but he needed to get used to it. I can't talk all kind and caring with him when I'm around Zayn and Liam. They'll think I've gone soft- though I have for Harry. It wouldn't be a good look.

"Now!" I restated in a louder and more threatening voice. Harry flinched, and I felt bad about it, but it was necessary to do. He immediantly got up from the bed and made his way into the restroom. I watched as he walked by me, an upsetting, heartbreaking look on his face. Disappointment. Regret. But to what? Me?  
\------------------------------------------------------

HARRY

To say I was disappointed and hurt would be an understatment. I thought that Louis was actually interested in me, but could it have all been a lie? It seemed so true. The way he's been acting made me feel like he really did care and like me. But maybe he's a good actor. Is this just his way of keeping me under his control?

I stepped into the shower, the water running over me, and thought about my dream last night. It wasn't a dream of fear, oe decisions, or the unknown. It was a simple, cute dream about Louis and I. It was the first dream that I've ever had about someone else. The first dream that made me feel warm and loved. Loved. I wish Louis loved me. But did I love him?

I closed my eyes as I put my head under the water. The dream was beautiful. Louis and I were lying down in a field of grass, flowers all around us, and there was nobody else there. It was peaceful. He told me that I was his everything. He kissed me gently on the lips and held me close to him. He whispered that he loved me, sendinf butterflies throughout my stomach. It was magical.

I opened my eyes as the curtain got drawn back and then Louis joined me in the shower. He didn't face me, didn't look at me, didn't awknowledge me. It made me feel so low and stupid for believening that he liked me. It made me embarrassed to have had such a dream about this man that was void of emotions.

Even as I had these thoughts, I knew they couldn't be true. Because Louis showed that he cared. He did. I felt it, and he showed it very well. He let his tough guard slip and he let me in, if only for a moment. That vulnerability was what I had to fight to uncover. Even if it was the last thing I do before I leave this place.


	15. Past Times

LIAM

"Would you just stop pacing?" I asked Zayn. It was only eleven at night, and I was trying to get some sleep, but he kept walking back and forth in my bedroom. He was complaining before about wanting to go back to the house, but now he was only mumbling to himself.

"How can you not be worried, Liam? Harry, the Harry that we both fancy, is alone with Louis. Louis! He could be hurting him for all we know!" Zayn said. I have only seen this vulnerable, caring Zayn a few times, and I always cherished the moments I did. It made me feel like he actually was human.

"Zayn, you and I both know that Louis feels something for Harry, even if he doesn't know it yet. You can tell by the way he looks at him and goes soft for him whenever he's around. You could tell being cruel to Harry hurt him a lot, and I think that Louis is just scared." Zayn sighed, but sat on the end of the bed.

"I know. I know, okay? But sometimes I just wish it wasn't that way. Sometimes I wish I could be in Louis's place because I see the way Harry looks at him as well. It's like, they're just drawn to each other. In a way, it is dangerous for us all." He said, and I understood what he meant.

"I know. It could hurt them the most, though." I said, feeling even sleepier already, but then Zayn exploded up again. I only sighed, thinking of how I can calm him down so I can get some sleep. This was getting very annoying, and I was too sleepy to deal with a moody Zayn.

"That's why I'm questioning if we made the right decision by leaving them alone! Don't you even care, Liam?" He said, but I stayed silent, feeling my eyelids getting heavier. "Liam!" Zayn said, grabbing my shoulder and shaking me. "Stop being a lazy fuck and talk to me!" He said, and that was it. I had enough.

I sat up in bed, Zayn's face almost hitting mine, but that didn't make me flinch or feel any less anger towards him. He was seriously getting on my nerves. "Yes, Zayn, I do care. I like Harry, a lot. I would give anything to be the one he's into so that Louis would never make a mistake, but I'm not. He likes Louis and Louis likes him- maybe they even love each other! I always question if my decisions are correct, and I know they are! I wouldn't have left them alone if I thought otherwise. And don't you dare call me lazy fuck because I don't know of one person who wouldn't be tired after dealing with your constant shit! It's not just a sob story for you, okay? I like Harry, too, but I'll be a good friend and let him and Louis be alone. Now can you please get the fuck out of my room and let me sleep!?" I finished.

I almost regretted it as Zayn looked pissed off, his eyes almost seeming to pierce straight through me. I would be scared, but an angry Zayn is nothing compared to an angry Louis, which we've all had to misfortune to see. I would be apologizing, but I was too tired to care.

"Fine then." Zayn growled before he stood up and walked to the door. He opened it, walking out, and closed it, but not before slamming the foor just to show how pissed he truly was. I groaned, knowing Zayn wouldn't forgive me, and I would have to work for forgiveness. I knew I would have to fix this, but right now sleep was calling my name.  
\------------------------------------------------------

The door closed tightly and then I heard a stumble, a small bang, and mumbled curses. I rubbed my eyes, trying to see in the dark. My sleep has dissapated from my mind, and all that I cared about was who just walked into my room.

I sat up in the bed and watched the figure stumble blindly in the dark. I was about to get up and turn on the light when the person hit the bed and I heard a quiet curse of "Shit!" in an all too familiar voice. Zayn. I didn't know whether to sigh in relief that it wasn't someone I had to fight, or groan because I remembered all of his previous complaining.

"Zayn, what are you doing?" I asked. He was stumbling around the room, seemingly off balance, and I couldn't help but notice the strong stench of liquor. I was never a fan of alcohol- not after my dad. I didn't even like the memories the smell brought up, but I still got out of bed and helped Zayn stand upright.

"What happened? Why are you here?" I asked, wondering why he didn't just go to his room to sleep off his drunkeness. He was clearly way out of it based on the way he couldn't even walk.

He ignored my question and just started laughing. He was so very annoying right now. I rolled my eyes as he laughed against my shoulder. "Come on, let's take you to your room so you can sleep this state off." I said.

"Noooo." He whined like a child, and it was a bit amusing. Usually Zayn was so calm and collected, so this was new behavior. "Please, Li. I wanna sleep with you." He whispered into my ear. I froze a bit as he wrapped his arms around my neck and whispered "Remember the last time we slept together? Because I sure as hell do."

I do remember. It was during the first couple weeks Louis brought me in to live with them. I had nowhere to go, and Louis found me. I knew I shouldn't have left with a stranger, but Louis seemed trustworthy, and he was. He gave me a home, and I made two new mates.

I was terrified of Zayn at first, but that all changed once I saw how cruel Louis could be. Still, I knew Louis wasn't evil- just angry. I was very observant. I saw that Louis was in control, he was the obvious leader, but Zayn had a knack for going against his wishes in his own way.

It all happened one evening. Louis yelled at me because I told him that I missed my home. He instantly lost it, yelling about how I could go back to my drunken father and my beat up mum. He yelled about me liking the pain that my dad inflicted. He shouted that I was ungrateful of everything he's done for me, but that was far from the case. I was conpletely grateful, but leaving behind your family was hard. I loved them, even if they didn't love me.

I remember being sent to my room a crying mess. Louis told me to suck it up harshly before he slammed my door closed and left. I cried on top of my bed, mt back pressed against the wall as heavy sobs escaped my mouth. I didn't handle yelling well. It brought back all the pain and memories, and Louis's yelling was worse than anything I've ever witnessed.

I remember how Zayn came in about thirty minutes later. I didn't notice him at first, but as soon as his hand touched me shoulder, I flinched and looked up at him. I expected him to, I don't know, make fun of me for crying or tell me that I was being stupid, but his eyes and voice were so caring in that moment.

*Flashback*

"I know it's hard now, Liam, but thing'll get better. I missed my family for ages, but you have to let it go, love." Zayn said. His arms were wrapped around me as he cradled me into his chest. I felt protected in his strong, warm arms littered with tattoos. The way he called me love sent butterflies through me, and I knew that Zayn was so beautiful to me right now.

"I'm scared. I'm scared to let them go. A-and how can I when I have all these bruises on my body to remind me of them?" I asked in the weakest voice I have ever heard. I was a bit ashamed of it, but Zayn only nodded his head in understanding.

We sat in silence for a bit, just listening to each other's steady breathing, before Zayn spoke up. "May I see the bruises, Liam?" He asked gently, and I nodded hesitantly. I've never shown them to anyone. I don't know why I was going to show them to Zayn now. Maybe it was the way he spoke so kindly to me, or the eay he held me just now, or the way his eyes seemed full of concern. I had no clue, but I was doing it.

I lifted up my shirt, feeling rather self-conscious about my body, but I knew Zayn was only looking at the bruises. I flinched a bit when his hand reached out and his thumb lightly stroked ome of them that was still healing. It was a fading purple, the most recent one from the very day I met Louis.

"You don't deserve this." Zayn said, a sudden anger filling his voice, and I was so confused and a bit terrified. I knew Zayn wasn't mad at me, but I still felt like the bruises were my fault. Maybe if I would've been a better son....

"I should have stayed out of their way. Whenever they fought. I shouldn't have tried to take away his beer bottles. I shouldn't have told him that he was a fuck up. I shouldn't have been the way that I am. I shouldn't have-"

The rest of the words were stolen out of my mouth as Zayn pressed his lips to mine. His lips were soft and warm. They held comfort in them, and they were a distraction. I wasn't blind, and Zayn was really good looking.

His hands gripped beneath my thighs and he pulled me so that I was straddling his lap. I've never really done anything like this before, so it was all a bit scary and confusing to me. Still, I went along with it. I wasn't stupid enough to push Zayn away.

I let out a small squeak as Zayn thrusted his hips up a bit to meet mine. He pulled out of the kiss and eyed me tentatively up and down. I could feel my cheeks heating up under his intense gaze. Finally, he looked me in the eyes and gave a small smile as he asked "Have you ever done this before?"

My mouth ran dry as I shook my head. Zayn gave me a soft, caring smile as his fingers caressed my cheek. "I don't see why not. Anyone would be lucky to be with you." He commented before asking "Do you want to, Liam? Do you want me?"

The answer to that was easy. I did want Zayn. You'd have to be blind or stupid not to want him. He was hot and dangerous, yet so caring and gentle right now. He was beautiful and I craved all of his attention at this moment.

I nodded, and he smiled at me as he kissed my lips in a small peck. "I'm not going to take your virginity unless you give me a verbal response, love." He requested. I guess it made sense. Verbal confirmation was the most official way to do things.

My mouth felt dry, so I licked my lips, trying to get the word out. Zayn stared hungrily at the action, and whispered "Please, baby." That was all it took for the word 'yes' to fall free from my lips.

That was all Zayn needed. He pulled me closer on him, if that was even possible, and meshed our lips together. His kiss was so soft and sensual. His hands gripped my thighs and then he slowly maneuvered us so that I was lying down on my back, and he was above me.

"I'm going to take care of you. I'm here." Zayn said with a small peck of my lips, and I nodded, letting Zayn have all the control.

*Flashback Over*

That night was absolutely amazing, and Zayn slept next to me to keep me safe and warm, but disappointment filled me the next morning as Zayn told me that what we did was a one time things. He said that we should both just forget about it. Then, he acted like it never happened, and over time, I got over it. It wasn't like I loved Zayn- or even fancied him for that matter- it was just the feeling of being used that made me upset. I still ask myself now if he's used me.

Looking at him now, in his drunken state, I realize this is the only time he'll probably ever speak of that night. To be honest, I've grown since then, and home doesn't seem so appealing now. Knowing that Zayn might've taken advantage of my weakness that night, it only pissed me off right now.

I pushed him off of me, not caring that he stumbled a bit in his drunkeness. He looked a bit shocked at me, but I was fuming just thinking of that night. I was so scared, and trusting, and so god damn naive.

"Go to bed, Zayn." I said, as I pointed to the door. "In your own room." I then turned, ready to walk back to my bed when I felt Zayn grip my arm. I closed my eyes, trying not to snap at him anymore.

"What Zayn?" I asked, as I turned to face him. He wasn"t smirking, he wasn't being a flirt, and he didn't even seem drunk anymore. His eyes showed fear and hope as he whispered "Please let me sleep in here." 

I sighed, seeing the vulnerability in his eyes. I nodded and he looked so thankful as we both walked on opposite sides of the bed and got under the covers. I turned to face away from Zayn, but he clearly didn't want that as he grabbed my shoulder. "Can you hold me?" He asked. Why was he acting this way?

I turned to him nonetheless, and wrapped my arms around him, immediantly closing my eyes. Just as I was on the edge of sleep, I felt soft, warm lips on my own. My eyes snapped open and I pulled away from Zayn.

"Stop it! Can you just go to sleep? I'm not playing this fucking game!" I yelled at him as we both sat up in bed. I refused to be another toy for Zayn tonight. It would be a repeat of that night, and I couldn't have that. Even if I didn't fancy Harry, I still couldn't have that.

"What game?" Zayn asked, seeming sincerely confused. I wish he was kidding because then that means that he thought he did nothing wrong.

"Really, Zayn? Wow." I said as I rolled my eyes. Might as well tell him it all. "That night we slept together, Zayn. You took my fucking virginity. I completely trusted you- no, I wasn't in love with you or fancied you or anything, but it still hurt when you said to forget about it the next morning. How the hell can you forget that you don't have the one thing that makes you pure anymore? How can you pretend to still be a virgin? I guess that's why I've never slept with anybody else- just me trying to forget. And that's stupid as hell! I was so vulnerable to you, and I'm not repeating that night. So go to sleep." I said.

I was about to lay down and turn away from Zayn, but he stopped me when he grabbed my arm. I sighed and then looked at him with one eyebrow raised. He looked both hurt and regretful. But why?

"Liam..." He trailed off as his eyes looked all over my face. "I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you that way. I was just... I was scared. I knew you didn't fancy me or like me that way, you did it because of your vulnerability, but I liked you. Fuck, I still do." He confessed, and my mouth fell open a bit in shock. What?

"I like you so much, Liam. Yes, I flirt with Harry, but I like you so much more. I was trying to push the feelings aside, trying to move on to someone else so that it wouldn't get awkward or complicated in the house, but I can't. And I know that now."

I was too in shock to say anything. I never knew Zayn felt this way. He hardly spoke to me after that night. Maybe that was his way of trying to forget me and that night. But that seemed impossible for the both of us.

"I like you, Liam. And that night meant everything to me. I can't forget it, and if I'm being completely honest, I don't want to." He said. I couldn't even comprehend all of this. I looked down at the comforter and just shook my head. I wouldn't believe him. He could be lying, eventhough it didn't seem like he was.

"It's true, Liam." Zayn said as he lifted my chin and I didn't have time to react as he pressed his lips to mine. It was much more delicate than ever before, and it sent butterflies through me. But Zayn wasn't the person I liked.

I lifted my hands to his chest to push him away, and I guess he knew what I was going to do. He broke the kiss for a second and whispered "Just pretend I'm Harry." He kissed me again, and I pulled back this time.

"What?" I asked. It was weird and twisted. Why would I do that? "Just pretend. I like you so much, Liam." He said before pressing our lips together again, his tongue delving into my mouth.

It made sense now. From how desperately Zayn was beginning to kiss me and pull me closer. He wanted this with all of his being, but he knew that I wouldn't do this when I liked someone else. He was willing to hear me say someone else's name just to be with me. It made my heart clench a bit and my eyes sting. Did he really like me that much? I made up my mind. I would do this- for him. I won't pretend. I'll be fully involved in Zayn.

He desperately straddled my hips and began to kiss down my neck. He found my sweet spot and I moaned out his name softly. He continued to suck there, and I felt a tear fall onto my neck. It meant that much to him. It was hurting me to see him this way. He was never this way.

"It's okay, Zayn. You're okay." I said as I held him close to me. He moved his face to my ear and whispered "I want you in me, Liam. Please." He begged. My mouht went dry. I don't know how to top. Zayn did it last time, and I remember him telling me that he never bottomed- ever. I never asked why, but it seemed to be a serious issue for him. So why now?

"Please." He begged, and I nodded. I helped him pull his shirt off of him and then he got up to remove his pants as well. I only had boxers to remove as I was undressed for bed. I slipped them off as Zayn laid down on the bed.

I moved in between his legs, trailing kisses down his neck as I slowly slipped his boxers off as well. I heard his small moans and whispers of my name as his pleasure was building up.

"Um, I don't know if... Do you need prep?" I asked him. He shook his head and said "I took care of it." That sounded so very hot. The way he was so desperate that he already stretched himself out before coming here.

"O-okay." I stuttered out. "Do you have a condom?" I asked. He nodded, pointing to his jeans. I got off of the bed and searched through them, finding one in his back pocket. I was nervous just looking down at it.

I made my way back to the bed and climbed back inbetween Zayn's legs. My hands were shaking as I opened the condom and rolled it on. I was a shaking mess of nerves. Zayn took a hold of my hands and said "It's okay. Just... Please."

I nodded as I lined my tip up with his entrance and Zayn moaned at the slight contact. I bent down, attaching our lips together as I slowly pushed into him. My breath was knocked out of me as I felt his tight, warm walls surround me. The experience was like nothing ever before.

Zayn's face contorted in pleasure as I pushed into him down all the way. I stopped, both of us straining from the pleasure that consumed our bodies. Zayn felt amazing to be inside of. It was almost addictive.

"Mo-ove." Zayn said in a cracked voice. I nodded before pulling out a bit and then pushing back in. I started out slowly, but all the build- up surpassed and made me begin to pound into him faster. Zayn was a withering mess, and then I remembered something.

The first time Zayn and I slept together, he found this perfect spot that made me see nothing but white. I began to desperately search for that spot, knowing I found it as Zayn let out a high pitched yell followed by a pornographic, honey slickened moan.

"F-fuck, Liam!" He cried as I began to constantly slam into that one spot. I could feel my high creeping up on me, so I gave Zayn everything I had to offer, loving how smooth his walls were around me.

With a couple more thrusts, we both came. Zayn screaming my name and clawing at my back, and me letting out several curses and whispers of Zayn's name. It was incredible. But then I realized that I probably took advantage of Zayn this time. Did I?

I had no time to consider as Zayn kissed me once more before whispering "Thank you." He fell asleep as I threw the condom away, hoping it wouldn't be awkward in the morning.


	16. Emotions

HARRY

I never thought I would wish to not be alone with Louis, but I do now. He's just been ignoring me and acting harsh all over again. I have no idea why he was this way, but I know it made me feel numb and completely used. Maybe even useless to Louis.

I know I shouldn't be worried about him. In a typical hostage situation, I wouldn't even care about anything but leaving, but, strangely, that thought hurt me worse than the thoughts of just being Louis's toy.

"Are you going even eat it or just let it sit there and get cold? Some people would enjot a decent meal like this." Louis said, pointing to my breakfast plate. I hated the rough edge to his voice. It made me flinch and not want to be around him.

"I know. My best friend would." I said under my breath, but of course, nothing truly gets passed Louis. He had ears like a dog at times, hearing even the slightest sound. I was surprised he couldn't read my mind as well.

"You mean your boy toy?" He asked. Really? Why was he acting this way again? I thought we'd finally gotten past this point of things. It was like taking one small, baby step forward and two giant steps back. It was so bad that I wish Zayn and Liam were back already.

My prayers were answered as the front door was opened and we heard footsteps making their way to the kitchen. I was so thankful when Zayn and Liam came into view a few feet away from us.

I got up from my chair, ignoring Louis's glare as I ran to hug Liam. I was so glad he was back. He was the one who usually talked to me about things and helped me through these veey confusing feelings. Maybe I could tell him what happened and he'd think of a way to fix it, maybe get through to Louis.

I pulled Liam into a giant hug, and he chuckled as he hugged me back just as tightly. "Good to see you, too, Harry." He said. I pulled back and then looked to Zayn. His eyes were on Liam, but once he saw me staring at him and waiting for a hug, he gave a small smile- one that I noticed didn't meet his eyes- and then pulled me into a hug.

I gave him a tight squeeze, guessing that he needed the comfort from the way he was acting. Though, now I was rather curious. What happened between the both of them, or to Zayn, that made him act this way now? Maybe I could talk to Liam about it later, as well?

"I'm so thankful you both are back." I said quietly to them. I was surprised they heard me because Louis automatically began talking over my words, not knowing that I even spoke in the first place.

"You both should go get changed and stuff. We have some business to talk about." He announced. I knew it was about me. What else could it have been about besides the money that they still needed to get?

"Harry, sit down and eat your breakfast." Louis said. For some reason, the calm, collected order was worse than his ruthless one. This one stated that he knew he could just boss me around. This one showed just how much control Louis had over me. This one made me realize that maybe I did have to show some of my own fight if I ever wanted to get through to Louis.

"I'm not hungry." I stated before turning to Liam and Zayn. "Would one of you like it?" They both looked a bit shocked at the fact that I said that without even stuttering or glancing to see what Louis thought. Yes, I was terrified to how he would react, but I had to do this. Otherwise, Louis would be conpletely controlling, which would get us both nowhere.

"Excuse me? That is for you, Harry. Not Zayn or Liam. So you either sit down and eat it like a good little pet or go to your fucking room!" Louis said, standing up and getting closer to me. And now I regretted trying to stand my ground. The anger in Louis's eyes was terrifying, and I gulped before I just looked at the floor, hoping he would let this slide.

"HELLO!? NOW!" Louis yelled loudly. I flinched before I quickly turned around, pushing past Zayn and Liam, and stomping my way to the stupid room that I hoped to never be in again. I hated the way it was so empty and pitiful- just like me. Empty. Empty and pitiful.

I made my way into the room and slammed the door shut. I hated the way that I flinched at the sound, hoping Louis wouldn't get even more pissed at me for it. I hated the fact that my actions were always laid out based on how he would react. I hated tiptoeing around him, but I didn't want to anger him.

I leaned against the door and slid down it, just like the last time. I hated this room. It was cold and ruthless. That was just like Louis. Cold. Cold and ruthless.  
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LOUIS

I was pissed off. Why couldn't Harry just listen to me instead of causing a fucking scene? I could feel Liam and Zayn's eyes on me as I was seething in my chair. Hearing that door slam made me want to go and just yell at Harry, but I remembered that look in his eyes before he left to the room.

I don't think he expected me to see the hurt in his eyes, but it was there and it was clear. It made me question why I was doing this. Why was I acting so cold towards him? He actually made me feel things- and that was dangerous.

"Was that really necessary, Louis?" Liam asked. I could tell by the way he asked it softly that he was also trying to be careful. I think Liam really understood the rage that could surge through people, considering the fact that he experienced it first hand. Still, I guess that slipped my mind because I was too outraged right now.

"Yes! It was Liam because he needs to understand how to follow the fucking rules just like you need to understand how to shut your fucking mouth!" I yelled. I regretted it as soon as Liam's eyes showed no emotion and he fell quiet. I regretted it inside, but that didn't mean I could show it to him.

Zayn got pissed at that and that's when he spoke up. "You're suck a fucking dick, Louis! You step on and push away the people who care for and about you because, for a reason only heaven knows, you don't want to feel emotions! Harry did nothing wrong, and you better watch your own mouth when talking to Liam because he's already been through hell and back! And I'm sure living here with you isn't helping!" He exploded.

Zayn has spoken out against me, and he has certainly stepped out of line before, but never like this. We all sat in silence for a while, but my attempts to keep calm weren't working. Not when everyone saw me as the bad guy. But then again, maybe I was the bad guy?

"Fuck this." I muttered as I stood up and left them alone. I walked to my room, only pausing once in the hallway to hear small sobs escape the room that I knew a beautifully broken boy sat behind. A boy that was slowly being broken by my heartless ways.  
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LIAM

"Liam? Are you alright?" I heard Zayn ask softly, but I couldn't reply. Everytime someone yelled, everytime I was ever threatened by a rough hand or an edged voice, the memories flooded back.

*Flashback*

"SHUT THE FUCK UP! I'VE DONE EVERYTHING FOR THIS FUCKING FAMILY WHILE ALL YOU DO IS WHORE AROUND WITH THE NEIGHBORS!" They were fighting again. I hated their fights. I hated the way the yelling echoed throughout the house. J hated having to pretend like it wasn't even happening, but it was.

"HA! IF ANYONE IS DOING ANYTHING FOR THIS FAMILY, IT'S ME! I WORK MY ASS OFF TO KEEP US ALL TOGETHER! YOU THINK IT'S EASY PUTTING UP WITH YOUR CRAP AS WELL AS DEALING WITH LIAM!" She yelled. I shut my eyes tightly, pulling the blanket over me some more. It hurt everytime she mentioned me when she talked about problems. Was I really that big of a problem?

"YOU BITCH!" He yelled. I heard the shattering of glass. Probably throwing another bear bottle at my mum. I can see it just like the first time it happened. That one hit her, glass in her thigh and on her arm, but she learned to duck down and dodge it. But that pissed him off more.

Next came the screams. The screams of her pleading, the screams of her cussing him out, and the screams of threats flowing from his mouth like rivers of painful promises. Every word dripped with acid, and I tried blocking it out, but then my mum gave an ear-piercing scream, and I jumped out of bed.

I ran all the way the living room, seeing my dad on top of my mum, hitting her and kicking her in any way he could, as she tried to fight back. She always tried to fight back, but my dad was stronger in every single way.

"STOP IT! STOP IT!" I yelled. I ran over to my dad and tried to pull him off of my mum, but that would lead to him pushing me backwards. I stumbled and landed on my bum. He would turn to me and glare. 

"Sorry fucking excuse for a son." He spat as he got off of my mum and walked towards me. From the ground, he towered over me. I would beg him not to hurt me but he always would. Yelling that I needed to learn to keep my fucking mouth shut.

When he was done, once he got all his rage out, he would leave to the bar. He didn't want to deal with us. I would find the strength somehow to make my way to where my mum lay on the floor. I would help her sit up, asking if she was okay, and she would push me off of her. She would lool me straight in the eyes, even when I was eight years old, and she would say "This is your fault."

And maybe it was.

*Flashback Over*

"Maybe it was." I whispered subconsciously. I had no idea I said it out loud until Zayn asked me what I meant. I barely remembered he was there, all the memories taking over. Each memory was worse than the one before, yet ending the same way.

They would always end with my mum saying that it was my fault, pushing me away, leaving me alone, showing no love or care for the fact that I was hurt. But I still cared for her. Maybe I was stupid to still care, but I did. She used to love me. Used to.

"Liam, please answer me. What are you talking about?" Zayn basically have so much concern that it was dripping from his voice. I turned to him, sweing his eyes filled with care and hope. I still don't understand why he cares so much for me. I was nothing worth caring for, but he was acting different after last night.

"My parents." I whispered out. "Maybe it was all my fault." I concluded, and he automatically shook his head before pulling me into a hug. I felt tears pricking my eyes, but I did not want to cry over this. I thought I'd finally gotten over crying about it, and I did not want to go back to that.

"That wasn't your fault, Liam. You should never blame yourself for it. There was nothing you could've done to stop it, and it certainly didn't start because of you. No matter how it may seem that it did, there was some underlayer to why it happened. It was not your fault." He said.

Zayn's voice was so soft and caring. He chose the words so carefully that you actually believed him. It was an amazing skill, and it was in these moments that I felt lucky to have Zayn around, even if he hasn't really spoken to me besides last night.

"Please don't blame yourself, Liam. You're too perfect for that." He said. I stiffened a bit as he kissed my cheek lightly. Eventhough Zayn was so kind to me and helped me through these times, I just... I didn't feel the same way he did about me. I felt bad for it. Why was I so stupid that I couldn't like him back when he clearly cared so much?

"I'm... I'm gonna go talk to Harry." I announced as I pulled out of his hug, and he nodded with a bit of a frown on his face. "Maybe you should talk to Louis." I suggested. He only nodded again before we both fell silent. I didn't want that silence to drag on, so I did the only thing I could and got up, leaving Zayn alone.  
\------------------------------------------------------

ZAYN

It hurt to just watch Liam walk away like nothing happened. I really liked him. I did like Harry. I did want to kiss him and everything, but Harry was nothing next to Liam. And now that I told Liam how I felt, Harry seemed to not even cross my mind anymore, besdies the fact that Liam still liked him so much. I had no idea if it was silly of me to be jealous of Harry, but I was. Liam liked him instead of me.

Still, I would do what Liam suggested. I would go talk to Louis. Maybe I could get through to him, though that seemed unlikely. If Harry couldn't get through to him, I see no hope for the rest of us.

I got up from my chair and made my way down the hall to Louis's room. I was a bit hesitant to walk into the room, because no matter how I acted on the outside, Louis's temper scared us all. He was literally like a bomb exploding, nothing within its radius was safe.

I took a deep breath and then opened the door, seeing a scene that I sort of wish I didn't. Louis was sitting on the edge of his bed, and he was actually crying! I have never seen Louis cry. None of us has ever seen Louis actually cry.

It was a bit intimidating. I was so used to the yelling and the anger that it made the crying so much worse than any of that. It made me feel unsure of what to do because this was such an unusual situation to be in. Maybe I should comfort him like any person. But what if that sets him off? I had no clue what to do, but then Louis spoke up.

"What do you want?" He asked in a broken voice, his hands immediately moving to wipe his tears away. So he was just going to pretend that I didn't see him crying? I'm sure that wasn't a good way to react.

"You know it's okay to cry." I said as I walked into his room and closed the door. "Everybody needs some kind of outlet, and you can't always yell and push people away." I added. That seemed to be the wrong thing to say to him because he scoffed at that.

"You think I don't know that? I'm not stupid Zayn. Why don't you just go and, I don't know, do whatever you do when you're alone?" I could tell it was supposed to come out sounding rude, but he was hurting right now, even if he didn't want to admit it, so it came out in a tired and broken voice.

"There you go, pushing people away again. You know you're only causing yourself pain by not telling any of us what happened to make you so angry and cold to the world. You are hurting yourself by not allowing yourself to accept the fact that you actually like Harry- a lot. You always get soft around him, don't think we don't see that, but then you turn cold and emotionless the next second. Why can't you allow yourself some emotions?" I asked. It was completely unbelievable to live the way Louis did.

"You think I like hurting Harry? You think I enjoy pushing everyone away?" He asked, finally returning to his angry tone. He rose from the bed, and I became very cautious. I needed to figure out a way through to Louis.

"Then why do you!? It makes absolutely no sense, Louis! None at all!" I shouted. Louis needed to learn that he couldn't just yell over everyone and expect to just get out of conversations.

"BECAUSE I CAN'T! I WISH I COULD BUT IT IS TOO HARD TO SAY THE FUCKING WORDS, ZAYN!" He snapped. That was the Louis we were so familiar with. But then, like a switch was flipped on, he broke into tears again, falling to the floor.

"I can't tell you two because what? You'd see me as just weak and foolish. I can't tell Harry because that would change everything. He wouldn't like me in the slightest if he knew about my past. I push him away because it's dangerous to feel how I do for him. What if we get caught? If he leaves, what is left of me? How can I tell him how I feel when I'm so scared he'll just break me?" He asked. I've never seen Louis so vulnerable, but I could relate to him.

I sat by him on the floor and said "Guess we're in the same boat." He gave me a questioning look and I continued. "It may not seem like it, but I really like Liam. I thought I could push my feelings away by not speaking to him, not saying how I felt, trying to move on. That's why I tried so hard with Harry. He was here, and I needed to try and forget about Liam, but I can't. Trust me, you should tell Harry. I told Liam, and I feel like everything is slowly coming together. I just... I wish he liked me back." I said.

"You like Liam?" He asked, completely shocked about it, but I only nodded. "And you told him how you felt?" I nodded again. "How did he respond?"

"Well, we...." I trailed off, signaling that it was something Louis probably didn't want to know. He raised his eyebrows and chuckled a bit. I knew that he understood what I meant. "I, um, I let him top."

His mouth fell open, and he looked a bit concerned. "Even after-" I nodded. We both sat in silence in for a few seconds before Louis nodded and said "I'll try. Tonight. I'll tell Harry everything. I owe him that."

"Do you really like Harry, Louis?" I asked. He nodded, his eyes going soft at just the idea of Harry. I could really tell he did. Maybe it was even more than just a liking. "Then never let him go."


	17. Truth and Love

HARRY

There was a knock on the door, and I just knew it was Liam. I got up from the floor, wiping my tears away, and opened the door. Liam gave me a soft, kind smile, but I couldn't return one. I couldn't even force a smile right now. I just really needed to tell Liam how I feel right now, and I hope he has great advice.

"Are you okay?" He asked me softly, and I shook my head. He sighed before opening his arms, and I pulled him into a much needed hug. I didn't want to cry, but I couldn't hide the tears back right now. All of my attempts to would most likely prove to be futile.

"C'mon. Let's sit down." Liam said. He led me over to the bed, and we both sat down. I let go of Liam, and we both sat in silence for a while before Liam urged me to speak. "Go ahead. Tell me everything." I was thankful that he wanted to hear about my problems, and I knew that Liam would help me out in any way he could.

"There's not much to say." I began with a sigh. "When we were alone yesterday, Louis was like a completely different person. He was so caring and gentle. He never yelled. He was so happy, so loving, and I liked that side of him. I liked that I didn't feel like I was walking through a mine field while talking to him. And we acted like, I don't know, a real couple. I mean, I wouldn't know what a real couple acted like, but I think that would be how they were.

"Then we... you know- did that." I said awkwardly, but Liam only nodded. "Well, he was a bit different this time. For a few seconds he wasn't rough and harsh on me, he was caring. He asked if I was okay, which he's never askd before. He went slow, but then it was like he remembered that he wasn't supposed to be soft and gentle. I mean, not that him being rough is a bad thing, but it felt... real? Like I wasn't just a toy to him." I finished. Liam nodded and thought for a while.

"How did he act this morning? After Zayn called him?" He asked. I was confused. Did Zayn call him? I must've been asleep still. I guess I'll just tell Liam how he acted since I woke up this morning. He already saw a small glimpse of how he was acting, but there were three different sides to Louis today.

"Well, when I firet woke up, he was kind. He was gentle. He seemed to be the same Louis that he was the night before, but then things got heated again and during he just became that same cold and dominate person he acts like he is. But that wasn't even the worse part." I said. No, I could handle a rough Louis, but the Louis that ordered me to the shower was completely different.

"What do you mean? What could be worse than that Louis? His anger is like an explosing volcano." Liam said, but the thing was, when he ordered me this morning, it was more than anger. It was like a defense.

"I don't know. Afterwards he ordered me to shower. Yes, his tone was that familiar anger, but there was something in his eyes. It was like he was regretting it as he said the words. It was like he was hurting himself by saying the words. I don't know. Maybe I just imagined it because of my stupid feelings for him." I said before I laid back on the bed. This was all making my head spin and hurt like hell.

"No. I don't think you imagined it." Liam said. I got up a bit on my elbows and looked at him as explained. "Harry, as much as you may not believe it, Louis does feel something for you. Even Zayn can see it. The way he acts around you is different than anything either of us has ever seen before. He used to be way angrier before you came about."

"How can he be any angrier than he is now?" I asked. I didn't even want to imagine how he used to be like. Louis must've been through so much to have to push everyone away all the time.

"It's possible. Some days he didn't even allow talking. Every little thing got on his nerves at times, but I knew he wasn't evil or even a bad person. I mean, he let Zayn and I live here with him, so he must've been kind-hearted deep down." Liam said, and I nodded. I could see that. I know that Louis is putting up an act from something that hurt him, and I really want to fix it. But how could I?

"Ugh! I just really wanna know what happened to him. What got him like this in the first place?" I asked, feeling completely lost when it came to this. I needed a hint or a clue, and maybe Liam could help me out there. However, I was disappointed.

"Wish I knew. Louis hasn't told either of us, and we are much too afraid of his reaction if we asked. I know that Louis got hurt somehow, who hasn't, but Louis's must have been terrible. He acts like he doesn't need anyone, but that's clearly because he's broken." Liam concluded.

"Dammit! I just wish he would-" We both stopped talking as the door slowly opened. We both exchanged surprised looks as Louis stopd in the doorway. My mouth fell open a bit because his eyes were so red- as if he were crying. Was he crying? Why was he crying?

"Hey, um, Liam may I talk to Harry alone?" He asked. That was new. He never asked for permission to do anything. On any regular basis, Louis would've just ordered Liam to leave and get lost, so why was he asking now?

Liam looked over at me, and I really did want to see what Louis had to say. Right now he was acting differently. He was vulnerable, and that was the perfect time to use that vulnerability to try and get him to open up to me. Maybe it was taling advantage of it, but it was the only way to try and know why Louis is how he is.

I nodded at Liam, and he got up from the bed. "Yeah, sure. Um, call if you need anything." He said to me before he made his way around Louis and left the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.

Louis and I stayed in our spots. Neither of us moved, neither of us spoke, and neither of us made any eye contact. I desperately wanted to know why Louis wanted to talk to me, but judging by his red eyes and distressed look, he needed to take his time getting it all out.

"I'm sorry, Harry." He finally said as he made his way to the bed and sat down beside me. His hand took my own, and I listened to his apologies. "I'm sorry for being a dick. I'm sorry for confusing you. I'm sorry for acting so cold towards you. I'm sorry for being such a bossy asshole all the time. I'm sorry for the way that I am. I'm sorry that I'm fucked up. I'm sorry that I always treat you special one second and then make you feel like crap the next. I'm sorry that I push everyone out and never let anyone in. I'm sorry for hurting you. Just know it hurts me, too." He said.

I was a bit speechless right now. The fact that Louis apologized for every little thing truly means that he was aware of all of his actions. It means he understood them, and I really wanted to know why he acted upon them.

"Then why do it?" I asked, and he paled a bit. "Why push people out, why act so cold, why hurt me when it hurts you, too?" I asked. I hoped he wouldn't turn cold right now. I hoped he would just tell me everything that was wrong, which was why I was surprised when he looked me in the eyes and said "I'll tell you. I'll tell you everything, just, give me time, yeah?" I nodded and then he took a deep breath.

"For starters, I wasn't always this way. My childhood was like something from some cheesy movie really. My parents were so loving, or it started out that way. I remember when it all changed. My mum got pregnant again, and my dad was so excited to have a baby girl. He loved me, but what guys wouldn't want a little daughter to spoil and protect?" He said, and that made sense.

"But then my mum had a small accident. She slipped and fell down the stairs one day, I can just remember all her cries for me to call for help. I did, but there was nothing the doctors could do. She had a miscarriage, and my dad was livid. He blamed her, saying that he did it on purpose. That's when things changed."

He took a deep breath, and I squeezed my hand, hoping to show him that I'm here, and it'll be okay. He gave me a small thankful smile as he squeezed my hand back, and then he continued.

"My parents began to fight a lot, we weren't that same happy family anymore. I remember one time my mum got so mad after a fight that she hit me out of annoyance. I forgave her for it, but my dad didn't. He said she was dangerous to be around. They slowly became so unhappy.

"They never ate together anymore, and then my dad began drinking and staying out late. My mum wasn't stupid, she knew he was cheating. She confronted him about it, and he got pissed off. That was the first time he hit her. Then he began to hate me, too. He would always yell at her, asking if I was even his child because she was a whore. He didn't even look at me after that. My mum was the only parent who showed me love. Really the only person to love me, and I wanted to protect her from my dad, but how could I? I was so young.

"I remember how we were slowly getting behind on bills because my mum got laid off of her job at the hospital. They had one too many nurses, and my mum was one they let go. The bills were too high, and my dad was the only one working. He blamed it on my mum and I, but most of the money went to his alcohol.

"My mum put her foot down one night. She sent me to bed as soon as my dad got home. He had been out drinking all day, and my mum had enough of it. I heard them fighting- worse than every before. My dad's voice dilled the whole house and the sounds of the hits he gave my mum and her cries echoed. I heard my mum scream, scream like she never did before. It was blood-curdling. It terrified me, and I knew something bad was happening between the two of them. It was that scream that made me run out of my room and check to see what was going on."

Louis was shaking by this point. It wasn't just his hand, vut his whole body. I saw him holding back tears and shaking madly. I felt my heart break a little, knowing this next part was the worst. This was what haunted him everyday of his life. I held him close to me and he sobbed into my neck for a while before he softly spoke into my ear.

"I saw them both in the hallway. My dad yelled at me, in a voice so cold and dark, to get back in my room. I remember exactly how everything looked. My mum was on the floor, bruised and bleeding. It was worse than I have ever seen her before. She looked at me with fear and worry. Even when she was so broken, she was svared and worried about me. And I couldn't help her.

"My dad was pointing something at her, and even in the dark, I knew it was a gun. I was scared to death as he made my mum tell me everything was fine and to go to my room. I slowly went back, but I heard that awful, awful gun shot as soon as I closed the door.

"I-I remember running out of my r-room to check on m-my m-mum. There- there was so much blood, and my d-dad, he was g-g-gone. He fled the scene. He shot my mum. My mum! HE SHOT HIS OWN FUCKING WIFE! SHE DIDN'T DESERVE TO DIE, HARRY! AND HE FUCKING SHOT HER!" He said, his cried getting hysterical. The pain in my chest was intense for him. He was so hurt right now. His fingers had tight grips on my arms, and his fingernails were digging into my skin as he cried against my shoulder, but I didn't care. He needed to let it all out in any way he could.

"But that son of a bitch got what was coming to him, didn't he?" Louis said in a cold voice. I had a feeling I knew where this was going, but I asked anyways. "What do you mean, Louis?"

He pulled away with a humorless laugh and said "He took my mum from me. She was the only person who cared about me. He couldn't fet away with that. I grew up in a fucking foster home. An abusive foster home. That made me cold, and nobody gave a damn about me. I didn't let anyone in because what if they were taken from me, too? As soon as I could, I got out of the foster home. I got a job at a car shop, and I got money. I bought a gun." He said, and I knew I was right on track.

"I tracked the motherfucker down. I found out that he was still alone and a drunk. I met him at the local bar he always hung out at. He was a sorry excuse for a person. He didn't recognize me. I got him drunk, helped him out of the bar and into the back alleyway. I shot him. I was never caught for that though." He confessed.

That's when his mood changed. He went from speaking in a cold tone to one that was regretful and scared. He looked down at his hands and cried softly. "I fucking killed him. So how does that make me any better than him? We're both murderers. We were both so unloved." He looked up at me and the tears in his eyes hurt me.

"I promised never to feel again. I didn't deserve it. So I stayed angry. I pushed people away. But then you cam along." He said. He didn't say it angrily, just cautiously, as if he was carefully selecting his words.

"Damn it, Harry. You make me feel so many things that nobody else has. You make me want to be happy. You make me want to care and let someone in. You make me want to forgive myself. You make me want to think I'm not a bad person. But how can i think that when the only reason you're here is because I'm using you for fucking ransom? Why do you have to be so perfect and so unattainable? Why do I have to be such a fuck up!?" He cried out.

I took his face in my hands and made him focus his eyes on me. He had a longing and hopeful look in his eyes. This was Louis. He was just a scared and regretful person who wanted nothing more than to have someone care for him- to care for someone- and to not be a bad person eventhough he thought he was.

"Louis, you are not a bad person. Not at all. Yes, you might've killed someone, but you were hurt. I know it doesn't justify murder, but you just made an epic mistake. You are not all bad though. You let Liam and Zayn live with you. You took them from toxic environments and took them in. You've never laid a hand on them."

"I did on you, though." He said, touching my cheek and my hand- to spots that have been injured before by him. I forgave him for those long ago though.

"I know. You have anger. That's because you don't believe you can be cared for. You don't see the good in yourself. Once you feel emtions, you get angry and lash out. But you can learn to control it. I'll help you. You aren't a fuck up, Louis. If anyone is, it's me." He raised his eyebrow at that, and I explained.

"I am falling for my kidnapper." I simply stated, and he gave me a shocked look. "Stupidest thing to do, but I am. There's just something about you that pulls me in. I've never felt this way about anyone before, but you made that all change. And we can get through this together. If you let me in. You can be loved Louis. You can be cared for and you can care. You are just lost and alone and scared. You need help. You need someone there." I said, desperately hoping he would agree.

I closed my eyes as he leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. It wasn't rough. It wasn't domineering. It was gently and it was full of passion. Louis's lips felt so right against my own, and I knew I was falling faster than expected right now.

He pulled away and smiled "Did I say you were perfect?" He asked. I pretended to think about it before saying "You may have mentioned it." He chuckled before kissing me again, and yup, I was falling head over heels for Louis. For this broken man who just needed healing. He was everything to me, and I would help him through this.

I pulled away from the kiss and rested my forehead against his. "Thank you for telling me. For trying let me in." I said. He nodded. I could tell his eyes were still opened even as I closed mine.

"Harry?" He asked after moments of silence. I hummed in response, feeling so at peace right now. This was how I wanted it to be all the time. No secrets or hurtful lies, just truth and tranquility.

"Will you sleep in my room again? I just... I just love holding you close." He said. My heart hammered in my chest at that, and I opened my eyes. I slowly nodded and he smiled before pressing another small kiss to my lips and saying "Thank you."

He grabbed me by my thighs and lifted me up, carrying me to his room as I rested my head on his shoulder and his fingers ran through my hair. Call me crazy, but all I felt for Louis in this second was love. I wanted to tell him, but it was way too soon for those words. Still, I think I knew it in this moment that I, Harry Styles, loved my kidnapper. No. I loved Louis Tomlinson. I could only hope he would, one day, feel the same.


	18. Trying

I woke up feeling really warm. I felt something hard and comfortable beneath me and something strong holding me close. I just felt so warm and protected, and I didn't really fancy the idea of moving at all.

"Good morning." Louis's voice ran out in a soft tone. I slowly opened my eyes and remembered everything that happened last night. Now I knew two things could go on. One, if I was lucky, Louis would finally let me get to know the real him and allow me to help whenever he was down. Two, if I wasn't, he would get angry about it and completely shut down on me.

"Um, good morning." I said cautiously. He gave a small chuckle, and I was curious as to why he was laughing. I think that was also evident on my face because he chuckled a bit more before finally speaking up.

"I'm not gonna get mad at you. I'm actually going to try. I won't shut down on you. I said that I would try, and I meant that Harry. I'm gonna try. I'm gonna try for you." He said, eyes never leaving mine, and that meant so much to me. He was actually going to try to change for me. Maybe he did love me, but it was still too soon to tell if that was what I was even feeling.

"Thank you." I muttered, and he smiled at me before pulling my face to his and pressing our lips together. This kiss held a deeper meaning to me. This kiss was without any secret between us. It was without any desperation to rid Louis's anger. It was just a simple kiss that made my head spin with all the emotions and entoxication of it.

"So fucking beautiful." Louis breathed out as he broke the kiss. I didn't want it to stop though, so I leaned in again and Louis chuckled at my eagerness to kiss him again. Nonetheless, he kissed me back.

"As much as I enjoy kissing you, and ravishing your body, I am actually really hungry right now." Louis said after pulling out of the kiss. I couldn't help but chuckle because he was acting differently. A bit happier, I would say.

We both got out of bed and then walked to the kitchen. I was full of joy as Louis held my hand as we walked through the hall. I watched as Liam's eyebrows rose as we entered thr kitchen, and he saw our joined hands. Zayn wasn't paying much attention, just looking at Liam with, what I assumed to be, longing.

"Good morning, lads." Louis said with a smile. That caught Zayn's attention as he turned to Louis with surprise. "Good morning?" He said in utter confusion as to why Louis was acting this way.

"Okay, I know that I never say that, I hardly awknowledge any of your presence at all, but I decides to try to change. Harry helpes me decide that. That talk we had, Zayn, I did it. I told him everything."

Liam choked on the cereal he was scooping in his mouth, and Zayn immediately turned to him and helped him out. "I'm fine." Liam said as soon as he could breathe again. He looked at Louis with surprise and asked "You told him everything? As in- everything?" 

Louis nodded and Zayn and Liam immediately looked at me in shock and pure disbelief. "I can't believe he actually told you." Zayn said. "I thought he was just saying he would."

"What? You thought I was lying?" Louis said, a small edge cutting into his voice, and I reallt didn't want him to get angry right now. He was doing so good, but I didn't really know how to calm him down when he got worked up.

"Well, you do lie at times." Zayn said, and I wanted to just tape his mouth shut. How clueless was he right now?

"When the fuck have I lied to you!? Huh?" Louis yelled, and his grip on my hand tightened. I looked at Zayn and shook my head, trying to get him to shut his mouth now. Zayn obviously didn't get the hint though.

"Well, you lied when you said that this job was specifically about the money. That was a lie because you ended up sleeping with and basically ravishing the very person we are holding hostage." Zayn said. I don't think he meant for it to be offensive because he only stated it matter-of-factly, but Louis didn't take it so kindly.

"THAT IS COMPLETELY FUCKING DIFFERENT! YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT, MALIK, SO DON'T ACT LIKE YOU DO! SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO FUCK LIAM AGAIN OR SOME SHIT!" Louis yelled before he dropped my hand and turned out of thr kitchen. We all stayed silent as he left, and I flinched when I heard his bedroom door slam shut.

"Why did you have to do that, Zayn?" Liam asked with a sigh as he put his face in his hands. It was clear that he was just hoping Louis would've gotten through one day without yelling or getting pissed at anyone. That was also my wish.

"I-I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to upset him! I promise. It just- I'm sorry." Zayn apologized. He wasn't even apologizing to me or looking at me for that matter. He was lookinf straight at Liam, a look of hopelessness on his face. Still, I felt like I had to reassure him that everything was alright.

"It's okay, Zayn. None of us know what sets him off. Don't blame yourself." I said. I then turned to where Louis left and sighed. "I think I should go check up on him." I just hope he wouldn't turn around and yell at me for making him tell me about his past because I didn't make him.

"Yeah. I think that'll be a good idea. And Harry," Liam said. I turned to him with a questioning look and he gave me a small smile. "Thank you. You know, for not giving up on Louis. For coming into his life in the first place." He said, and I only nodded. I would never dream of just giving up on Louis. Though I can't describe why he means so much to me.

I turned around and made my way down the hall to where I knew Louis's room was. I was having second thoughts about talking this out with him. He could just blow everything out of proportion and end up yelling in my face, or he could just block me out again. But he promised he would try. But he didn't try just now when Zayn got him worked up. He just exploded.

I opened the door hesitantly and saw Louis sitting on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands. He automatically snapped his head up, and he stood up. "Fucking Zayn! Always making shit complicated!" He said as he walked towards me.

I gulped, afraid of what I was going to say next, but it was true. "He's not the one who made things complicated. You're the one who blew up, Louis." I said quietly, and he looked a bit taken back.

"What the hell, Harry!? Are you saying this is my fault? So much for saying I'm not fucked up then, huh!? SO MUCH FOR SAYING YOU WERE FUCKING FALLING FOR ME! MAYBE YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S LYING HERE!" He said, walking closer to me and pinning me against the wall. I was terrified, but I had to try and get through to Louis. I had to try and calm him down even if it seemed impossible to do.

"L-Louis, breathe. Calm down. I am falling for you. I am." I said softly, looking him in the eyes. They were intense and full of hurt and betrayal. I needed to get through to him because I hated seeing the underlying pain behind his anger.

"DO NOT FUCKING LIE TO ME, HARRY!" He yelled in my face, hand tightening their hold around my arms to the point where it was painful. I bit my lip, attempting to hold in a small cry, but it didn't work. My mouth opened and a small shriek fell from my lips.

Louis's eyes widened in realization before he let me go. He took a step back and his eyes held desperation for forgiveness in them. I looked down at my arms and saw small white marks from Louis's fingers. "You promised. You promised to try." I whispered, trying so hard not to break down.

"I am! I am trying, Harry. I'm so sorry. Please. I never meant to hurt you. Shit! I hurt you again! I'm sorry. Zayn, he just- fuck!" He said. I was really seeing just how unstable Louis really was. It was like he had no clue what to do if he wasn't showing anger.

"He didn't mean it in an offensive way at all. Louis, why did it get you so worked up?" I asked, rubbing my arm to stop the pain. I knew that there would probably be small bruises, but they wouldn't be that big of a deal, and they certainly wouldn't make me change my mind about Louis.

"Because! I just..." He took a deep breath, calming down before stepping close to me again and lookong me in the eyes. "Do you understand that you mean so much to me, Harry?" He began, and I was already hypnotized by him through that first statement. It was a bit surprising, but I nodded and let him continue.

"No. I don't think you do." He chuckled lightly and gave me a small smile. "Harry, you mean more to me than anyone I have ever met. The way Zayn said it, I don't know, it made me pissed off because he doesn't understand. He made it seem like your just a good fuck to me when you are so much more! He doesn't understand shit! He doesn't understand." He said.

I was a bit in shock. I wasn't going to lie to myself, I thought I was just a toy to Louis, but now he was telling me all of the things I've wanted to hear. He was telling me how much I meant to him, and I would gladly listen to every word.

"Ever since you came here, you've been all I can think about. I don't even fully understand it myself, but being around you, even the thought of you, makes me so happy. I haven't been happy in a long time, Harry, but you make me want to be. You're like this little glint of hope that just came into my life. It pisses me off when someone talks about you as if you mean nothing to me when, really, you mean everything. Everything and more." He said before he leaned into me and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. It was so gentle that I wonder if it even happened because his lips felt so soft and almost nonexistant against my own.

"You mean everything to me." He repeated, and I could only nod before capturing his lips in mine again. I wouldn't say it outloud yet, but he meant everything to me, too.  
\------------------------------------------------------

"Louis, can I just apologize, I-" Zayn began to speak as soon as we walked into the living room. I got Louis to calm down a bit more, and I just hope he was civil now and didn't have another explosive episode or anything.

"It's fine, Zayn. I just- don't ever talk about Harry as if he's just a piece of meat to me again. He's so much more than that." Louis stated in a strong voice, and Zayn nodded with apologetic eyes. I was sure that he wouldn't make the same mistake again, but who's to know.

"Great. Now we can all relax and maybe watch some television?" Louis asked us all, and we all nodded. Liam was going to sit on the small loveseat at the edge of the living room, but he seemed to change his mind as Zayn plopped down. He walked across the room and sat in the recliner. I saw Zayn frown, and I knew something was definitely up with them.

I wanted to ask them what happened, but as soon as Louis's hand took mine, all of those thoughts were blown out of the window and my sole focus was on Louis. It still amazed me how he had so much power over me and how attracted I was to him.

He led me over to the long, white sofa and laid down on it, pulling me down onto his lap. I laid back, my head resting onto Louis's chest as he wrapped his arms around my waist, just like the day we spent alone.

That day was honestly the best day of my life. That was the one day where Louis didn't yell or get angry at anybody. He acted like a regular human being, almost seeming to have no pent up rage at all. It was a Louis only I have gotten to see, but maybe now that won't be the case.

We were watching a random show when Louis apparently got bored and began channel surfing. I wasn't really paying attention to any of the shows he skipped over, all of them seeming dull in some way.

He flipped over a couple more channels and then I tensed up as I saw my mum's crying face on a news channel. I desperately wanted to yell at him to stop and leave it there, but I wasn't up for Louis having another episode.

He seemed to notice when I tensed though because he held me tighter and then I heard him whisper in my ear. "If you want to watch it, I can change it back." He said. That was new. I stared at him in utter shock, but I could tell he was being 100% honest.

"C-could I?" I asked hesitantly. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again. He pressed a small, soft kiss to my lips, that took my breath away, and nodded before the channel was returned to. I sat up as my mum's face showed up on the screen again, and I hung onto every word she said as if my life depended on it.

"I don't know where Harry is right now, but I continue to hope he is safe and that he is... alive. I love my baby boy so much that it kills me to even think about anyone hurting him. Yes, we got a phone call asking for money for the safety of his return, but Harry was there, and he told us not to send any. Just because I did not does not make me a bad parent as so many have commented." People were calling my parents bad people? They were literally the best, kindest, and most understanding parents ever. How could people say that?

"If following my son's wishes makes me a bad parent, then I don't want to be a good one. I would give anything to have Harry safe and sound, but I will not give into a threat when my son specifically told me not to. People always say that we have to listen and learn from the youth, well, that is what I am trying to do. I am trusting Harry when he says that everything will be fine. I am attempting to hold myself back from my motherly instincts and let police handle everything. DO NOT SIT HERE AND SAY THAT YOU WOULD GIVE MONEY TO SOME KIDNAPPER WHEN THEY DON'T EVEN DESERVE THE AIR THEY BREATHE!" She yelled. I felt Louis tense up this time, and I felt a bit bad at the fact that my mum was being so harsh with her words.

"I know a thousand parents who would not give in to the threat we have been given. I know so many people who would rather stand their ground and fight for their child than to just show how weak and helpless they really are. And if the person who took my son is watching this right now, I want you to know that you have a very precious boy in your clutches, and I will fight to have my son back home safe and sound. And if you lay a hand on him, I hope that you get touched by an angel because you will need the luck." My mum said. It was a bit shocking at how threatening and mad she has become. She has never said words like that before. I felt bad now for not wanting to return home, but, still, the thought of home made me upset, knowing Louis wouldn't be there as well.

My mum got off of the screen as the camera switched over to a news anchor, and Louis sighed underneath me. He lifted me off of him and sat me down on the couch before he got up and walked away. I knew he wasn't mad, no, he was thinking something, and I was desperate to find out.

I got off of the couch and trailed behind him, wondering what was going on with him right now. We walked all the way to his room and he held the door open for me to walk inside as well. I walked into the room and he closed the door behind us both.

We stood in silence before Louis asked "Do you want to go home?" 

To say I was shocked would be the understatement of the year. He was actually asking me this? And it didn't sound like an ordinary question, but an offer. Did I want to go home? If I was honest with myself, no. I really didn't.

I shopk my head slowly and Louis sighed in what seemed to be relief before walking to me and laying us both down onto the bed. He held me close, my head rested against his chest as one of his hands rubbed my back and the other played with my tassled hair. It was peaceful, and it felt safe. I didn't want to go home. Not if Louis wasn't there. But would staying here only worsen the state my mum was in?


	19. Old Friend & Mine

ZAYN

Liam and I were the only ones left in the living room, and I desperately wanted to talk to him about that night, but he seemed to be avoiding me now. Was this the way he felt after the first time? I mean, it was a bit different because I actually have feelings for Liam, but it must still be the same stinging feeling.

He was acting so casual, as if nothing has happened. It made me feel even worse just knowing that this was probably the way I made him feel once, too. I wanted to talk to him about it, but I had no clue what to say or how to start the conversation. Guess I just wing it?

"Can we talk Liam?" I asked. I usually wasn't ever nervous or scared, but this was an exception. I didn't even know how to explain how I felt to Liam. I didn't even know if I could ever win Liam's feelings over. He was just so into Harry, and I wish he was into me.

He looked over at me with a raised eyebrow and then nodded, turning the TV off. "What do you want to talk about?" He asked as he rested his elbows on his knees and waited for me to speak. I had a feeling he already knew, but he was probably hoping it wasn't what he thought.

"About what happened in the hotel room." I fell silent for a bit before I whispered "About us..." Liam gave a sigh of frustration, and I suddenly wished I never brought the topic up when he finally began speaking, breaking me with every word.

"Zayn, there is no us. What happened in the hotel room was one night only. It'll never happen again. I thought we were on some unspoken ground there? I thought we both knew that that was a mistake?" He asked, and it hurt that he thought of it as a mistake. Did he not remember that I like him a lot?

I looked at him and glared at him a bit. "It was not a mistake." I began, and he looked shocked. "Liam, when I said that I liked you, and that I wanted you, I didn't just mean that I wanted to have sex with you! I like you for way more than that. God, I think I want to actually be with you! I know you like Harry, and that you've never had feelings for me, but please tell me- is there any way to make you like me? Anything I could do?" I asked. I know I sounded desperate and whiny, and I hated that, but I just really liked Liam. I would do anything to be with him.

He sat there silently, and I already knew his reply. I groaned and gripped at my hair in my own frustration. "I don't know what you expect me to say, Zayn! If someone doesn't have feelings for a person, it's not like they could just grow them all of a sudden! You can't tell yourself who to like! You know this! And you know I like Harry-"

"Thanks. Thanks for that glorious reminder, Liam. Really. That's just the thing I need to hear right now." I said, getting a bit rude and sarcastic because that was my defense to being hurt. Liam didn't need to know that though.

"Well, you don't have to be an ass about this, Zayn! I'm trying to let you know that I don't want to lead you on. You already know how I feel. That night was fun, but you're not the one I like, and you can't just make someone like you bu doing one little thing." He said, but that only pissed me off more.

"Nobody's being an ass but you. What happened to 'I don't wanna repeat that night' because you did it! You still slept with me! And you didn't pretend like I told you to. You said my name, Liam! You came, saying my name! That has to mean something!" I defended.

"Well, sorry for getting your hopes up." He muttered, and that was all I could take from him. He wasn't worth this. I just needed to forget about him like I did all those years, even if it hurt. Go numb again, Zayn.

"It's okay. It always will be." I said before I got up and walked towards the front door, deciding to get some air. "Zayn, please don't be this way, I-"

I didn't listen to a word he said as I left out of the door, only to see someone hiding at the side of the house. "What the fuck!?" I yelled before they jumped on me, tackling me and knocking me down to the ground. "LIAM!"  
\------------------------------------------------------

HARRY

"LOUIS!" I heard Liam yell and Louis immediately tensed up. Something was wrong. What was it? I felt my heart beat quickly as he got out of bed and said "Stay here, Harry. Okay? Just stay here, babe." He pressed a quick kiss to my lips, but it felt like a goodbge kiss. Why would he kiss me goodbye!?

My heart beat was completely out of control as he left the room. I heard Zayn and Liam both yelling in the living room. Oh my gosh! What if the police actually found me? What if they were getting arrested, and I would have to leave Louis? No. I couldn't do that.

I sat up on my knees on the bed, trying not to cry or panic. It would be okay. Please let everything be okay. I was going to go unsane, but then I heard Louis's voice.

"What the hell is he doing here?" He asked, sounding completely shocked. The yelling and struggling seemed to stop, but then my eyes widened as I heard a very familiar voice.

"Ugh! Get the hell off of me! Where's Harry!? HARRY!" I heard him yell. "Shut up!" Louis yelled. I didn't stay on the bed anymore. I jumped off and ran out of the room, running all the way to the living room and peaking around the corner. I couldn't believe he was here.

I hesitantly stepped out of the hall and asked "N-Niall?" His eyes snapped to me and he stopped struggling to get out of Liam and Zayn's hold. His eyes softened, and I knew that he was thankful I was okay. But what was he doing here?

"Harry! I'm so glad you're okay! Did they hurt you?" He asked, and I shook my head, still shocked that he was even here. How did he get here? Why was he here?

"Can you let me go?" Niall asked Liam and Zayn. They looked at each other, debating that. They both looked to Louis, and Louis looked to me. I nodded, not wanting my besy friend to be restained like that. He sighed before nodding to Liam and Zayn.

As soon as they let him go, he rushed to me and pulled me into a hug. "Oh my goodness, Harry! I've missed you so much! Every second you were gone, I just kept beating myself up. I should have stayed at your house that night! Maybe this wouldn't have happened if I would have stayed!" He said.

"Niall, I missed you, too, but it's not your fault. I'm the one who told you to go home anyway. And if you would have stayed, we both would have gotten kidnapped. It's not your fault." I told him. He was my best friend, and he needed to be told that this wasn't because of him. Nothing he could've done could have stopped this from happening.

He pulled out of the hug and looked me in the eyes. He gave me a small smile and said "I love you, Harry." He then leaned in and I was shocked when he kissed me. After all this time, he still didn't get that we were just friends?

"Enough!" Louis yelled, ripping him away from me. "Take him to Harry's old room." He told Liam and Zayn. They both nodded before grabbing Niall's arms and pulling him away. It was completely silent between Louis and I as they left.

I was still a bit confuses as to why Niall was here and how he even found me. My thoughts were interrupted as Louis grabbed my arm and dragged me along behind him. We went to his room and he slammed the door shut behind us.

He let go of me and walked across the room, pacing back and forth, hands balled into fists, and his breathing a bit heavy. I knew he was trying to control his anger, so I stayed quiet and gave him time to calm down and think. I didn't want him to lash out, and he promised to try and keep control of himself.

He finalled stopped pacing and took a deep breath before turning to me. He walked closer to me and pretty soon my back was pressed against the door. "You're mine." He whispered before leaning in and kissing my lips. I knew that he was pissed, hurt, and jealous that Niall kissed me, but Louis is the only one I want.

"Mine." He growled again as his lips left my own and trailed down my neck. I leaned my head back against the door as Louis's lips only trailed lower and lower. His hands moved underneath my shirt, trailing lightly on my skin.

Even the slightest touch made me crave more of Louis. He really had no reason to get jealous or possessive because he was the only person that made me feel these kinds of things. Never have I ever felt so addicted or attracted to someone.

He lifted my shirt up all the way and pushed it over my head. I allowed his hands to travel my body, loving the way he touched me just right. I felt his hands travel to my pant button, and I allowed him to undo them, pulling the zipper down, and tugging them off of my legs.

"Mine, Harry. All mine. So fucking gorgeous, babe." He mumbled as his hands traveled everywhere, making me harder than I was already as he slid his fingers up my thighs. One hand reached out and tweaked my nipple, making me let out a broken cry at how amazing it felt. He leaned into me and whispered "Bed. Now!" I nodded and scrambled over to the bed, immediately climbing onto it and laying on my back.

Louis walked over to the bed, removing his shirt. I licked my lips in anticipation, wanting to feel his skin against mine already. He stood at the edge of the bed and removed his pants and boxers at the same time. I whimpered, just wanting to feel him already.

He chuckled at I wiggled around on the bed a bit. "Patience, love." He said, his hand reaching out to gently caress my hip, and it left me wanting, almost begging, for more. I stayed silent though as he crawled onto the bed, but not on me. The only skin contact I got was his hand trailing down my chest.

His hand left a trail of warmth everywhere he touched me. His hand slowly slid down my chest, reaching out and tweaking my nipple, making me hiss in pain and pleasure. He smirked as his hand trailed lower, and his fingers fingers danced along the waistband of my boxers. His fingers dipped into my boxers and he made his way between my legs as he pulled my boxers off of me.

His fingerd ran up my thighs and ghosted around my hardened member. I was consumed in want for Louis. He knew that, too. "What do you want, Harry? Hmm? Tell me, babe." He whispered before he nipped at my ear love and licked down a vein on my neck. I was a whimpering mess, barelt able to speak.

"Y-you, Louis. I want you. Please!" I begged. He smirked and I felt him push into me, making my breath hitch for a second before I was moaning and begging for more. Louis kissed me harshly as he made his first thrust, and I loved the burning sensation that spread througout me.

"Mine. You're all mine. Okay?" He growled as his lips began to suck and kiss on my neck. I nodded, not being able to speak until Louis growled again and gave one harsh thrust into me, which had me yelling.

"Yours! I'm yours! Fuck, Louis!" I yelled out, forgetting everything but the pleasure that Louis was giving me.

"Fuck, baby. So tight. So ready for me all the damn time." He mumbled. I moaned at his words, throwing my head back on the pillow and laying there, allowing Louis to take me any way he wants to.

"Lou, I'm gonna cum." I mumbled out, and he nodded. He took that as his cue to push in deeper, move faster, thrust harder. It all felt so nice, and once Louis spoke, I couldn't last any longer. "Cum for me, Haz."

With that I shot out my seed and felt Louis also hit his high. We pushed in a few more times before finally pulling out and pulling me close, pulling me into a bruising kiss. I hummed as our lips pressed together, completelt content with everything right now.

"I should talk to Niall." I said, and he nodded. "Yeah. You should talk to Niall, but let's just lay here first." Louis suggested, and it sounded like too good of an offer to pass off.  
\------------------------------------------------------

I got out of the bed, seeing that the room was pretty dark. Did we actually fall asleep? I had no clue, but I did know that I needed to talk to Niall. I walked around the room, finding my boxers and pants and putting them on. I was going to find my shirt when I saw Louis's instead. I picked it up and smiled, slipping it on over my head. He smelled amazing and wearing his clothes made me feel like his arms were wrapped around me.

I then made my way to the door, carefully opening and closing it so that Louis wouldn't wake up. I made my way to the room that I uses to stay in, not even wanting to walk in there again, but I knew I had no choice. I turned the lock on the door and then walked into the room, hearing small sniffles.

"Ni? Are you okay?" I asked. He sat up in bed and his head snapped over to me, a smile filled his face and he ran up to hug me. "It's okay, Ni. You're fine. We both are. Louis would never hurt us." I said.

"Wait a minute! I'm suppose to be mad at you." Niall said as he pulled away from me and crossed his arms. He was supposed to be mad at me? Why? What could he possibly be upset with me about?

"What did I do? I haven't even seen you for such a long time. Whatever it is, I'm sorry, Ni. You're my best friend." I said, and that made him speak up.

"That's exactly it! I haven't seen you in so long, and everyone is going insane trying to look for you, but you're apparently living here and getting fucked by your kidnapper!" He yelled. My mouth fell open in shock, and he rolled his eyes. "You're not exactly quiet, Harry!"

"Niall, you don't understand! Louis is-"

"A guu that is using you to ransom money from your parents. The person who took you in the first place. The one who manipulated you into thinking that what you are doing is normal, or even okay. It's not, Harry! You're smarter than this!"

"I never said it was normal or okay! You don't even know the half of it, Niall! I like Louis! I like him so much, and I know that this whole situation is fucked up, but I can't help it! He makes me feel happy, and like everything is okay. He's not holding me hostage here. I don't really want to leave." I said, and Niall's mouth fell open.

"Really? How can you be so dumb and inconsiderate!? Your parents are worried about you, everyone is, and you chose to stay here with that monster!? You chose to like him and be with him when you couldn't even like your best friend!?" He yelled, and that made me snap. I was so done with this conversation.

"You know what, Niall? I came here because I wanted to talk to my best friend and ask him how he found me and why he is here, but your obvious jealousy won't allow that. I'm sorry that I can't like you that way. I've tried so many times to let you down gently, but you just won't let go! I like Louis, and I am not apologizing for something I can't control. I'll be back tomorrow if you want to stop yelling and accusing me of things you don't know about and actually talk to me." I said before leaving the room, not stopping when he said my name. I walked out and locked the door, feeling tears fill my eyes.

"Harry. Are you okay, love?" I looked up and saw Louis walking towards me. I shook my head and he held me in his arms, my head rested on his shoulder. I couldn't hold the tears in, and they began to flow down my cheeks.

"Let's go lay down, babe. It's okay. I promise." I nodded and looked up, pressing my lips to Louis's. I know my feelings for him are real, and I knew Louis's were real as well. Nothing wohld make me doubt that. I followed Louis to his room again, and we both laid down, me falling asleep in his arms, feeling warm and safe.


	20. Explaining Changes

HARRY

I was eating breakfast with Zayn when Liam came into the living room with Niall. I immediately looked down, not wanting to face him right now. He really hurt me and pissed me off last night. It's not like I could have even imagined that I would fall for my kidnapper.

"He wants to talk to you." Liam said, nodding his head at Niall. I looked at Liam and then Niall. A part of me wanted to tell Liam that I didn't want to talk to him, vut the other part knew that I had to explain and he had some explaining to do, too.

I nodded, and Liam looked concerned while Niall seemed to have a spark of hope in his eyes. Liam pointed to the chair across from me and Niall quickly took it. I knew that he already understood to listen to them, though Liam would never hurt him. Maybe Zayn or Louis might if things got too tempered, but not Liam. Never Liam.

"C'mon, Zayn. Lou says the three of us have a mission to take care of." Liam said, wording it so that I had no clue what they were going to do, but I felt like it had to do with me. I was the main thing they were dealing with right now. I just wondered what Louis was going to do, but I would ask him later on.

Zayn sighed but nodded and stood up. "We leaving Harry alone here?" He asked, and Liam nodded. "Louis really trusts him that much?" He asked, raising his eyebrows up in surprise and Liam nodded yet again. "Wow. Well, see you later on Harry. Don't disappear." He said with a small chuckle, and I couldn't help but smile at him, too. We all know that I would never even dream of leaving.

They both walked outside to the car and then I heard footsteps coming down the hallway, perking up because I knew who they belonged to. Louis stepped into view and I would be lying if I said that I didn't completely drool over him. He looked that good.

He was wearing a grey suit with a tan coat over it. His hair was styled up, and he looked amazing. He smiled when he saw me, and that was the finishing touch. When did I fall so hard for him?

"Good morning, love." He said quietly as he came to me and pressed a kiss to my cheek. It left such a burning sensation, and I loved feeling this way. It was dangerous how fast I was falling for Louis, but I wouldn't change anything about this.

"You're going out?" I asked, and he nodded. 

"We have some business to take care of, but we'll be back soon. Be safe while I'm gone, yeah?" He asked, kissing my hand, and I nodded. I wouldn't try anything, and Louis knew that. I just needed to have this talk with Niall and then I'd probably clean around a bit, make them understand that I am thankful that they made living here manageable and that they never hurt me badly. It was unimaginable that I would become friends with all of these people.

"I'll be back soon." He repeated, pressing a kiss to my lips, and I kissed back. I heard Niall make a low growling noise, but Louis only smiled into the kiss. I knew he was loving the fact that he had me and Niall didn't, but Niall was still my best friend. I hope.

Louis pulled away with a soft smile and then let go of my hand and walked towards the door, leaving Niall and I alone. I didn't realize I was stuck in a daze from Louis's actions until Niall cleared his throat. My head snapped over to him and he rolled his eyes.

"Could you maybe hide your obsession over your little boyfriend a little more? It's very obvious." He asked bitterly. Niall was my best friend, but he was currently getting on my nerves. He didn't even know anything that I felt or anything that has happened since I've been here.

"Sorry, Niall. I'll try and keep it on the down low for you, yeah?" I asked with the same amount of bitterness and sarcasm. I got up and took my plate with me, going over to the sink and beginning to wash it.

"Is this really what you do, Harry?" He asked me. I never responded but he continued along anyways. "Harry! They left you alone! We could leave right now! Literally nothing is stopping us. Let's go!" He said, walking over to where I was.

"I know they left us alone, Niall. They've left me alone before, but I can't just... leave." I said. He looked at me with a dumbfounded look and I sighed before attempting to explain.

"I just, I tried leaving last time, but I couldn't get passed the front doorstep. I just feel like I can't leave them, you know? They're actually really nice and cool, and getting to know them, you'd think the same, too." I said.

"Harry, what happened to your sense!?" Niall asked asbhe gripped me by my shoulders. "They. Kidnapped. You! They are not nice or cool people. I guarantee you they're just waiting to hurt you! I just want you safe and at home already. Everyone misses you so much. I missed you a lot." He said, taking a step closer to me.

"Niall, I missed everyone, too, but I don't really want to leave. You know that I never felt emotions for anyone, I've never been interested in anyone, but Louis is different. He makes me feel things that I never thought I could feel before. Yes, it's sick and the whole situation is twisted, and it sucks that we are in this position, but I don't want to leave him. I think... I think I might be in love with him." I said quietly and Niall looked upset and shocked at that.

"HOW CAN YOU LOVE HIM? Harry, he is a bad person! He kidnapped you! Oh my god! He manipulated you, didn't he? Some kind of brainwash. Because there is no way that the Harry I know would ever love somebody that caused him so much pain!" He said, and that was all I could take.

"HE'S NOT A BAD PERSON, NIALL!" I yelled, and Niall looked surprised. I never yell. I've never even raised my voice at him or anyone before. I was just tired of holding it all in and of him not listening to a word I had to say.

"Yes, they kidnapped me. Yes, it was a terrible experience at first and I wished that I was dead every second of every day, but they helped me out of that mind set. Liam was caring from the beginning, okay? He was my only support here, and he actually reminded me a lot of you because he was always there for me in my hardest time. He actually tried to help me escape back when I wanted to. He left the door unlocked, but it didn't work. So there's that. Wanna call Liam a bad person?" I asked, and Niall looked down for a second before shaking his head and looking back up at me.

"And Zayn. Zayn wasn't the most welcoming person ever, or maybe he was too welcoming, but I got to know him on a deeper level, and I know how terrible his past was. Everything he does is a front because he is so vulnerable on the inside. He's helped me, too. When my hand got cut," I paused, showing him the scar that was forming on my hand, but not saying how I got it. He gasped, but I continued. "Zayn was the one who took care of it. He was so professional about it, and he made sure I was alright. Wanna say he is a bad person?" Niall shook his head again, and I saw him close to tears, but I kept going.

"Finally, Louis." Niall sighed as I mentioned his name, but I didn't care. "At first, Louis did hurt me. You all heard the slap over the phone. But he apologized for that. He gives me trust and he makes me feel like nothing could go wrong. He took in Zayn and Liam from their terrible situations. At first he was intolerable and completely didn't care for me, or so it seemed, but things changed. He used to be really explosive. He would snap at random moments, but he's trying to stop. He's trying to control his anger for me. Yesterday when Zayn said some choice words about what is going on between us, he got very upset and told me that I meant so much more to him that what Zayn or anybody else thought. You know I'm good at reading people, Niall. I'm good at recognizing when people lie. Louis didn't lie. You know, he actually let me watch my mum talk to the tele, and he asked me if I wanted to go home, but I just can't leave him, Niall. Please understand because you are my best friend! I think I love him, and call me crazy, but I feel like he may feel the same way." I concluded.

We both stood there in silence before Niall gave a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry, Harry. I- I should have listened to yoi about everything last night. I'm sorry. I know that none of this is normal, and I'm not saying that I agree with it, but I will support you as your best friend. But can I be honest with you for a second?" He asked.

"Of course, Niall. We're always honest with each other, aren't we?" I questioned, and he nodded.

"Yeah. But this is really important. So, you're probably wondering how I got here and why I'm here." I nodded. That was the first thing I questioned upon seeing him here. "And I'm gonna tell you." He said. I listened intently as he began explaining.

"Well, ever since we got that phone call, I've been trying to track the call down. The phone wasn't turned off right away, and I managed to get the location after a while. So, I left a note for my parents saying that I'd be back soon, and I set out to find you. The obvious thoughts of the danger I could be going into my mind, but finding you was more important. If I'm being completely honest, I thought that if I saves you and brought you home it would make you love me. Not just as a friend, the way I love you." He said. It hurt to see his shoulders slump and he looked absolutely broken and upset.

"And I expected there to be one guy, so I tool the chance and tackled... Zayn?" He asked. "Dark haired one?" I nodded he he continued. "Right, but he called for help and well, not my best moment of rescue. And then last night when I heard you and Louis, it hurt. It hurt a lot. To expect to come here and win you over to find out that you already were won over by someone." He said.

"Niall, I have never tried to lead you on in anyway. I do love you, but only as my best friend. I constantly felt sorry that I couldn't love you as anything more, but I can't force myself to. But I hate hurting you. You should try and move on, Ni because this constant pining isn't good for you." I said.

He nodded and said "I know! I know that. I try to forget my feelings for you, but it's hard. It'll obviously take time, so please don't rush me, Harry." He said, and I nodded.

"Of course, Ni. So, wanna watch some TV?" I asked. He gave a little laugh at me random topic change and nodded. "If we're not leaving, I guess it's the next best thing."

I've never been more thankful for such an amazing best friend.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LOUIS

"So, where are we going exactly?" Zayn asked as I drove away from the house. I had no problem trusting Harry because I knew he wouldn't leave. If he didn't the first time, why would he the second time? It was risky still, so I had to make this quick.

"We're actually going to go shopping." I said. Zayn and Liam raised their eyebrows, and I smirked. It was for Harry. If he wanted to stay then he needed his own things. He didn't need furniture or anything because he would be staying with me, but he needed his own clothes, not random hand-me-downs from the three of us. I also searched online, remembering when I was researching their family and how much money they had, and I remembered that his birthday was coming up soon. This week actually.. What could I do to make that day special?

"It's for Harry isn't it?" Liam asked, being the clever and observant one that he is. I nodded and the agreed to help me find everything we needed. Zayn would get the clothes because, in my opinion, he was the most stylish out of the three of us, Liam would look for any toiletries that he might need, and maybe shoes, and I would look for the perfect present for him.

I've never been this way for anybody. I've never bought birthday gifts. Yes, for Zayn and Liam I did have cakes, but I never bought them gifts. I wanted to get something that would mean a lot to Harry and make him feel special because he meant so much to me.

We got to the mall, seeing as it had so many different places to find everything, and we all split ways, agreeing to meet up at the same entrance in an hour. I walked off, looking through windows and trying to find something that would be perfect for Harry.

Nothing really caught my eye right away. Everything was way too over the top. I had the mind set that Harry would like simplier things. But I'd also like him to have something that he could always have with him. Finally, I decided to settle on a simple present that was pretty common. I got a customized necklace, but I just hope it was something he would like.

I walked back to the entrance and saw Zayn and Liam standing there, bags full of items. I nodded to them, letting them know they did a good job, and we could leave now. We got into the car, and on the drive back my mind wandered.

How long would Harry be able to saty with me until we got caught? Would it be better to just let him go home? Could I even make him go home? He seemed pretty set on staying, but he could change his mind anytime he wanted to. That thought terrified me. I hated to admit it, but I was falling for Harry, and I was falling hard.

"What'd you buy, Lou?" Zayn asked. I knew that they were probably curious because I didn't have any bags. The small box fit in my pocket just fine. I knew that they both knew how much I likes Harry already. No point in hiding it anymore.

"A birthday gift for Harry." I said, not giving away what it was. They didn't need to know anyways. The only person who did was Harry, and I hope that he really liked it. If he doesn't, would that ruin things? Now I was just thinking silly.

We got back home and we all walked inside. I looked to the couch to see Harry and Niall sitting there. Well, Niall was sitting and watching the tele, but Harry was sleeping, leaning on Niall a bit. A surge of jealousy shot through me, but I knew it was fine. Harry said he was mine already. I trusted him, which was a hard thing for me to do with anybody, but Harry brought out abilities that I didn't know I possessed.

For example, I was never the romatic type, but I suddenly had all these ideas on how to make Harry's birthday perfect. Maybe I should send his parents a letter, let them know that he's fine. That way they wouldn't be too worried aboum him. It would be too riskt though.

I walked over to where Harry was sleeping and went to pick him up when Niall glared at me. I knew he loved Harry, and I don"t blame him for that, but he needed to let him go. But is that a bit hypocritical of me? Because I was also holding onto him.

"Listen, I don't like you. At all." He said, and I rolled my eyes, but then his tone shifted to a saddened and gentle one. "But Harry seems to, so I'll allow this, but if you ever hurt him-" He began to threaten.

"I won't." I said as I lifted Harry off of the couch and into my arms. I smiled down at him as he rested his head against my chest. This boy was changing me, and it was scary, but it all felt so right. To not always be angry, but to feel all these emotions and let others in a bit more. I haven't snapped once today, so that was good.

"I care about him too much to do that." I whispered before I left, not caring that everyone was staring. I went to my room and gently laid Harry on the bed, removing his shirt and pants so he could sleep comfortably. After removing mine as well, I crawled into bed beside him and held him close to me. He shifted a bit in his sleep and his eyes opened up a bit.

"Louis," He stated, rubbing his eye, and I hummed in response. "I missed you today." He yawned out and I smiled, pressing a small kiss to his precious lips.

"I missed you, too, baby. Now go to bed." He nodded, smiling an adorable sleepy smile at me before he fell alseep snuggled into my chest. That's exactly when I knew my thoughts were 100% correct. I was completely in love with Harry Styles.


	21. Love and Letting Go

HARRY

Everything was super quiet as I woke up. I have never felt so at peace before, but for some reason I felt that way today. I have no idea what day of the week it even is anymore, but strangely the lack of time telling was like a blessing.

I wiggled around in the bed, pulling the sheets up higher around my chin because they were just so warm. Everything felt warm, and I decided that I just wanted to lay here all day and snuggle up with Louis. That sounded like it would be absolutely amazing!

I turned around to face him and snuggle myself into his chest, but I was met with nothing but cold sheets and an empty bed. I was so confused for a second, but then I realized that he was probably already up and just eating breakfast. I turned to look at the clock on his nightstand and my eyes widened a bit, seeing that it read 2:40 pm. I slept through most of the day!

I groaned, not wanting to get up but knowing that I had to. Niall was probably bored without me, and Louis was probably just waiting until I did get up. I find it cute that he didn't just wake me up and let me sleep instead.

I took the covers off, deciding to get up, but I immediately regretted it when the cold air washed over my skin. I felt a shiver crawl up my back, and I quickly pulled the covers back over me. I'll just take it with me. I got out of bed, draping the covers over my body, and got dressed quickly, decided to dress comfty in a pair of Louis's sweats and a t-shirt. I also pulled socks onto my feet, feeling absolutely warm right this second.

I pulled the blanket tight around my shoulders and then walked out of the room, making my way down the hall. I was halfway down when I heard Louis's voice. "NO! That goes over there, Liam! Please lads, everything had to be perfect!" I heard him say.

What was going on? Were they setting something up? I shook it off and continued walking towards them, curious at to what was going on, but I was even more shocked when Niall spoke up. "Calm down, control freak. I'm sure Harry will love anything coming from you." He spoke in a bit of a bitter tone, but just the fact that he was interacting with them made me even more confused and curious.

I walked nesr the end of the hall, the blanket making soft swishing noises on the floor, and then I heard Louis again. "SHH! You hear that? He's coming. Get ready!" He said. He seemed really excited right now.

I turned the corner into the living room and froze in shock and joy as they all yelled "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HARRY!" I saw a sign hanging across the entry way that read 'Happy Birthday', a few balloons scattered around the room, some flower vases set up for the atmosphere, and Louis was holding a cake with the same message on it that they yelled out to me.

"Wha-" I was about to ask, but Liam spoke up then.

"Louis decided that it would be fun to have a birthday party for you. We woke up early to make the cake and set stuff up." He says, and only then did I notice how tired Zayn looked. He wasn't much of a morning person, but it meant a lot that he still got up to help everyone out.

"Thank you so much everyone. Um, how did you know it was my birthday? Niall, did you...?" I asked, but he shook his head, so I trailed off, listening to what he had to say instead.

"Wish I did, but Louis was the one who found everything out." He said. I could tell he tried to sound like he was okay with everything, but there was a bit of sadness laced in his voice that I think I only picked up on because I know him so well.

I turned to Louis and he sent me a small smile, passing the cake to Liam and then walking up to me. "Happy birthday, baby." He said, leaning in and pressing a small kiss to my lips. It was much too quick for my liking, and before I knew it, I was pulling him back in for a deeper kiss. He chuckled and pulled back from me.

"We have plenty of time for that later." He whispered, winking at me before speaking so everyone could hear him. "Today is your day, Harry. So, whatever you want to do just-" My eyes randomly drifted to look out of the window, and I got very excited at what I saw.

"IS IT SNOWING!?" I asked, pushing past everyone to see outside, and sure enough, tiny, white snowflakes slowly hit the ground in masses. It's been a while since it last snowed. I was always captivated by the tiny white flakes that littered the ground in seconds. It looked breath-taking.

"Yeah. Just started up a couple hours ago." Louis said as he walked up behind me. I felt his arms wrap around my waist and his head drop onto my shoulder. "Would you like to go outside in the snow, babe?" He asked, pressing a light kiss to my neck.

I felt so warm and so important right now, wrapped in the blanket and Louis's arms. It was like nothing else mattered in the world. Still, I pressed my hand against the window, feeling the cold through the glass. I did want to go outside. "C-can I? I mean, what if someone sees me?" I asked.

He gave a small laugh before saying "I wouldn't be worried about that. Hardly anyone drives this way, Harry. It'll be fine. But if you want to go outside, you need to stay warm, babe. C'mon. Let's see what you have to wear." He said.

He pulled me along behind him, leading us to his room. He looked through all of the clothes he bought me, which I still feel a bit bad about because he didn't have to use any money on me, but he did. He says he wanted to and that I didn't have to worry about it.

He got out a sweater shirt and a jacket before also getting out some pants and some socks and boots for me. "You get dressed, babe. I'll be right back." He said, pressing a small kiss to my lips and walking out of the room.

Lately Louis has been a lot more affectionate towards me. The harshness that used to fill his every action was slowly dissipating, and I loved it. I loved how caring he was now, but I still knew that even if he was angry or ever harsh that I would still love him the same. I just love Louis, and I have finally come to terms with that. I really hope he feels the same way, but I get that the odds are low.

I changed into the clothes that he set out, and turned when he walked back into the room. He seemed dressed for the snow as well, and he came up to me, holding out gloves. "Here. Don't need your fingers freezing up." He said with a cute little smile as he slipped them onto my hands. I swear I was in so deep with this man.

We walked into the living room and saw everyone else waiting by the front door. "Finally. Let's go." Zayn said as he opened the door and we all ran outside into the snow. I looked behind me at the many footprints that now littered the clean, beautiful, white snow. They were being quickly filled already with newly fallen snow.

"What do you wanna do first, Harry?" I heard Louis ask. I was about to reply when I felt something cold hit me on my shoulder. I gasped out as I shook off the snow. Then, Louis smirked, showing the other snowball in his left hand. "Snowball fight?" I glared at him before taking a hold of his hand and pushing it into his own face.

He gasped and I ran away as he called "Oh, it's on Styles! Zayn, Liam- my team." Louis called and they followed him as he made more snowballs. "Niall! Help!" I giggled out as I ran to him, away from Louis's team throwing snow at me, and he was already throwing some back their way.

I gathered snow in my hand and made it into a perfect circle before throwing it back, managing to hit Zayn in the stomach. He shivered a bit at the cold before aiming back at me, but I ducked down and it flew over my head.

We got into a full on war, snow being thrown every which way, and I felt my fingers begin to numb, but it didn't effect me at all. I was so in love with the cold weather. I loved the small chill it sent across my skin.

"Okay! I'm freezing! I-I'm gonna go inside now." Liam said as he rubbed his hand together to try and get a bit warmer. He began to walk to the house and Zayn suddenly dropped his snow and said "Yeah, I'm gonna head in, too." He said.

"Sorry, Haz, but my fingers are frozen. I'll make some hot chocolate for all of us inside, yeah?" Niall asked as he was trailing behind them. I was going to accept that offer, but then I felt Louis's arms wrap around me from behind and whisper "Or you can stay out here with me."

It was an obvious decision. I would rather stay out in the snow that I was so fond of, and with Louis added to it, it was absolutely amazing. "Um, Louis and I are gonna stay out for a bit longer." I called. Niall turned, looking a bit surprised, but he nodded hesitantly and left inside the house.

"What do you want to do now?" Louis asked me as I turned around in his arms. "Um, wanna build a snowman?" I asked, and he nodded. "Anything you want."

We both started up with small snowballs before pushing them through the snow. It took a while to get each one to the perfect size, but we finally got three and stacked them all up. I was about to find a way to make the face of the snowman when Louis tackled me down onto the floor.

"LOUIS! It's f-f-freezing!" I giggled as he began to tickle my sides. "Sta-Sta-STOP!" I laughed out, and he was laughing at me as well. He finally stopped and pressed a kiss to my lips. I kept my mouth closed as small giggles still erupted through my body.

"Sorry. Just decided that we need to make snow angels." He said. I laughed as he rolled off of my and onto his back. He began to move his arms and legs, starting to make a snow angel. I decided to go along with it and did the same.

I giggled everytime our hands hit each others from the small amount of space between us. "Done!" Louis exclaimed as he got up from the floor, trying his best not to mess up his piece of art. He held his hand out to me and I took it. He pulled me off of the ground and we stood back, looking at our masterpiece.

Louis's angel was imprinted deeper than mine in the snow, and the two angels were attached at the place that the hands go. I thought it was actually something sort of beautiful.

I yelled and then squealed out from laughter as Louis picked me up and spun me around. My legs wrapped around his waist as I did my best to hold onto him. We landed on the ground, Louis on his back with me straddling his waist.

"I love them." I said, referring to the two angels we created in the snow. I looked out at the snow covered ground and breathed out a bit, smiling as I saw my breath fan out in front of me. I looked down at Louis, and was hypnotized by his beauty.

He had flakes of snow in his fringe, scattered all about his hair. His skin was a bit paler in the snowy coldness, but he was still a lovely shade of tan. Tiny snowflakes also seemed to cling onto his eyelashes, and the blue of his eyes popped out against all of the white. His lips were pink and his cheeks were flushed with red from the icy breeze of wind. Instead of the usual hard look on his features, he looked soft. He looked so soft and cuddly, and it made me wanna melt. He was so breath-taking, and I felt my heart erupt in awe at the beautiful man beneath me.

"I love you." I heard Louis say, and thay snapped me out of my daze. I looked at him in shock, and I felt my eyes begin to water up. I wasn't sure if I heard him currently, but my heart was hoping that I did. Because I cared for Louis so much, and I've been hoping that he loved me back.

"W-what?" I asked, my voice breaking a bit from the emotions wracking through me. Was he being serious? Never in a millions years would I ever think that Louis could ever love me like I love him.

"I said I love you. Harry Styles, I love you, and I have never loved anyone before." He said. I felt a tear fall and them Louis's thumb came up to wipe it away. His thumb pad was so gentle against my skin, and I was in tears in a second.

"Don't cry, love. Why are you crying, Harry? I'm sorry if I-" I shook my head, and he stopped talking, waiting for me to explain why I was crying.

"I just- I love you, too, Louis. And I was so scared that maybe you didn't love me. I mean, you said that I meant a lot to you, but I was still so insecure and unsure, and hearing you say that you love me just makes me feel like I could just fly. I'm just... I'm so happy right now. I love you, Louis. I love you, I love you, I love you." I cried as he pulled me in for a kiss.

This kiss was way different than any kiss we've ever shared before. This one was full of so much passion, so much care, so much love. It made me heart best rise to an extreme amount of beats. Everything was so perfect right now, and I was so happy.

He pulled away and we both wore stupid smiles on our faces. "Happy birthday, Harry."  
\------------------------------------------------------

NIALL

"I just... I don't get why he would choose him." I said. I was talking to Zayn, whobwas a surprisingly good listener. He understood things, and he was very comforting to talk to. "What does he have that I don't? We've been best friends for years! I know everything about him." I said.

Yes, I was venting about Harry and Louis as they were still outside in the snow. I still really loved Harry, and as I looked out the window at how happy he looked with Louis, it hurt. I wished that was me, but there was nothing I could do.

"Maybe that's just the problem, Niall. You are his best friend. You can't just expect feelings to change. Don't worry though, you'll find someone who will love you, but you need to learn to let go of loving someone you can't have." He said.

"And what about you? Chasing after Liam. You say you love him, but he doesn't seem to feel the same way. Are you chasing after him still?" I asked. Maybe it was a touchy subjecy to bring up, especially when I don't know them at all, but Zayn seemed easy to talk to.

"I... I don't know." He sighed. "I really do love him, but he likes Harry as well. I don't blame him, I don't blame you, and I don't blame Louis. Harry is certainly captivating, but I just wish Liam loved me back. When he said my name instead of Harry's like I told him to that one night, I guess it gave me hope. Maybe I'm stupid." He said. I felt bad for him. I knew what it felt like for the person you love not to love you back. Maybe it was too late for me to win Harry over, but it definitely wasn't too late for Zayn to win Liam over.

"No, Zayn. You aren't stupid. You still have a shot. Maybe Liam avoids you like he so because he does have feelings for you, maybe he doesn't know or doesn't see them yet. But I'll help you." I said. Zayn looked at me with misery and hope mixed onto his features.

"What do you mean you'll 'help me out?' If Liam doesn't like me then nothing will change that. It's foolish to even try to get something out of him when I know I don't have a shot with him." He said. He sat back in the chair, and I shook my head.

"You don't know that yet. Maybe a little jealousy will spark the fire. I'll help you make Liam jealous if you want. I don't know. Maybe it's too late for me, but not for you." I said as I looked out of the window again, seeing Harry straddling Louis's waist. They were kissing, and I have never seen Harry so happy. Yes, I was happy for him, but it hurt me as well.

Zayn shook his head and said 'I would, but no thanks. If anything was going to happen it would've. Maybe I should take the advice I gave you and stop chasing. Seems pointless. Anyways, I hope things get better for you, Niall. You seem like a nice lad." He commented. I thanked him as he got up and left to his room, I assume.

As much as I'd hate to admit, the guys all seemed pretty cool. And as much as I hated to admit it, Louis made Harry happy, and he seemed to love him. Maybe letting go was the right thing to do. Only time would tell.


	22. Love

HARRY

"Ow!" I whined as I burnt my tongue on the hot chocolate. Louis laughed at me and said "I told you to be careful, love." I nodded, showing him that I knew that he said that. The chocolate just smelled so good, and it was hard to wait for it to cool a bit.

Everything was absolutely perfect right now. Louis and I basically spent the whole day out in the snow. I was so cold when we came inside. Everyone else was already in their rooms, probably going to bed, and Louis decided to make us hot chocolate to get warm. We also grabbed piles of blankets and just snuggled together on the couch in front of the small fire place they have. I felt so loved and so so warm.

"Right. I've got that now." I said as I pressed my hand to my mouth, feeling the numbness of my tongue now. I hated the way you couldn't taste things the same way after you do burn your tongue. Louis laughed at me and pressed a kiss to my cheek.

"I love you so much. I'm so glad I can finally say it!" Louis said, pulling me closer against his chest. I snuggled close to him and couldn't help myself from clinging onto his shirt. I was so into Louis it was ridiculous.

"I love you, too. Saying it is like a dream, and hearing it is amazing." I said. "Now, when can I eat my birthday cake?" I asked. I honestly forgot about it from being outside all day. The day was absolutely perfect, I would say.

"Right now. I'll go get us a plate of some cake. Don't burn your tongue again while I'm gone." He chuckled, and I stuck my tongue out at him as he moved me off of his lap and got up from the couch. He just smirked before walking away to the kitchen.

I picked up my cup and brought it to my mouth, about to drink but remembering that it was hot. I blew it gently and them timidly took a sip, making sure not to burn my tongue. That would have set Louis off on another round of teasing me.

"Here you go, love." Louis said as he came back with a plate that had two slices of cake on it. It was chocolate, because who doesn't love chocolate, and it looked absolutely delicious! Louis gave me a fork and kissed my cheek as he said "Happy Birthday, Harry." I smiled before we both began to eat the cake.

I was absolutely in love with the taste of this cake. The way the icing melted on my tongue was so enchanting and the chocolatey flavor was simply divine. "This is so good! Who made it?" I asked him.

He chewed and swallowed the piece of cake in his mouth before saying "Well, I would love to lie and say I did," I laughed a bit at that and Louis smiled. "But I have to give the credit to Liam. He's the one who does a lot of the cooking. Niall volunteered to taste everything. The batter, the icing, he chose it all to perfection." He said.

"Sounds like Niall. And Liam is a gifted baker." I chuckled and Louis nodded as he took one last bite of his cake before setting the plate down. I set my fork down on top of the plate as soon as I finished the piece that was on it.

"As good as that was, I think it's time that I gave you your birthday present." He announced, and I was honestly surprised. I thought the whole 'party' was enough of a surprise. I didn't even think he would actually get me anything.

"Wha-what? You bought me... a present?" I asked in complete shock. Louis was simply amazing for being so considerate of everything on this day.

"Yeah. It's not much, but I- well, c'mon. I'll show you." He grabbed my hand, and we stood up from the couch, Louis leading the way down the hall and to his bedroom. I was super excited for whatever his present was.

We reached his bedroom and he pushed the door open. "Okay, wait here and close your eyes." He said as he sat me down on the edge of the bed. I nodded before I closed my eyes tightly. I didn't want to ruin the surprise by peeking. That would absolutely suck!

"Okay." I heard Louis's voice waver a bit. He must be nervous, but I guarantee he didn't have to be. Have you ever just been so into a person that the present they give you wouldn't even matter because you love them so much? Maybe I was in too deep, but I really didn't care anymore.

"So, um, it's not much, but..." He trailed off, and I heard his open something that sounded like a box. He pulled something out of it and I felt the bed dip down behind me before something cold was draped across my chest and around my neck. A necklace?

I felt Louis's fingers fiddle with the back of it, trying to hook it onto the chain. I kept my eyes closed, giggling a bit as he let out whispers of cuss words at his frustration of not being able to clasp it down. Finally, he got it and said "Open your eyes."

I opened my eyes and looked down, grabbing the chain and looking at the necklace. I felt my eyes fill up with tears as I saw that the necklace held two heart intertwined together. I looked closer and saw little engravings on the hearts. I pulled it closer to my eyes and squinted a bit, reading it aloud.

"For your eyes only." One heart read and then I read the other one. "I show you my heart." It was such a cute message, and I couldn't hold the tears back or the stupid smile that played across my lips. I felt so loved and so in love with Louis.

"D-do you... like it?" Louis asked nervously, and I thought it was cute. I turned to him and nodded quickly. "Yes. Yes, Louis. I love it!" I then leaned into him and our lips pressed together in a passionate kiss.

He kissed back with so much love and passion that I wanted to cry. We moved further back onto the bed and he laid my down on my back. His hands traveled over my sides and I felt him pick my shirt up a bit, his warm fingers creating circle patterns on my waist. I couldn't keep my moan in any longer.

Louis smirked into the kiss and that's when it began to get heated. He licked my bottom lip and I opened my mouth, giving him access. His tongue fought with mine before I let him take control. I know he loved control.

Pretty soon, Louis's lips left mine and began to trail down my neck. I tilted my head back, giving him as much access as possible. The feeling of his lips on my skin was definitely a high that I would never get used to. I loved this so much, and I loved the boy doing it. That's when I decided that I didn't want this to just be another fuck to him or anything. If it was, it would break my heart.

"L-Louis." I stuttered out. He pulled back a bit, looking up at me. He must've seen the worried look on my face because he came back up at eye level with me. He kissed my nose softly and then looked me in the eyes.

"What's wrong, love? Do you not want to?" He asked. He didn't look upset or pissed off when he asked, and that gave me the confidence to say what I felt I needed to.

"Louis, I love you. A lot." I began, and I looked down at where my hand was placed on his arm. "I just... I don't want this to mean nothing but a mean for pleasures. I don't want that. I wish it meant so much more to you as well." I said, voice lowering at the last sentence.

Louis looked a bit upset now, and I closed my eyes, hoping I didn't ruin everything by opening my mouth. I felt his hand lift up and caress my cheek softly. "Open your eyes, please, Harry." He said.

I took a deep breath and slowly opened my eyes, a tear slipping out at how frightened I was that I ruined everything. Louis gave me a sad smile and wiped the tear away. "Don't cry, love. It's okay. It just hurts me to think that you don't think this means anything to me. It has for a while now. Harry, I know I was heartless and a jerk at first, but you made me feel so many things besides anger. And I do love you. I love you so much. This means so much more to me than just a chance to get laid. Harry, I love you, and I wanna make love to you." He said, making more tears flow free.

"Would you let me, Harry?" He asked, and I nodded. Louis gave out a small breathless laugh before he pressed his lips to mine again, the kiss being nice and slow, yet full of so much love I wanted to just break down in cries from how amazing it felt.

I felt Louis's hands trail underneath shirt before pulling it up. We broke apart for a second and Louis pulled the shirt over my head, discarding it onto the floor. He gently pressed kisses up my chest before nuzzling his nose into my neck then looking me in the eyes. "You're beautiful, Harry. My beautiful boy." He said.

I pulled him in for a kiss, but I broke it soon after, pulling off Louis's shirt as well. His skin was absolutely perfect. The amazingly tanned color drove me insane, and his little tummy was my absolute favorite thing in the world. He smiled down at me and then said "Let's get these off."

His hands went to my zipper and unzipped them, following that by unbuttoning my pants. He slipped my pants off, pulling my boxers along with them. He stood up and did the same to himself, leaving us both completely bare. I blushed as Louis crawled back on top of me, the intensity and meaningfulness of the moment catching up to me.

He pressed gentle kisses onto the inside of my thighs and I let out a gasp and small panting breaths. It felt amazing and he was being so gentle and caring. His hand went back to hold the curve of my back as he crawled back to me. "I love you so much." He whispered, pecking my lips before saying "Are you sure you want to? We don't have to tonight." He said, but I shook my head. I wanted this. I wanted to feel Louis's love.

"Please, Lou." I said, and he nodded. He looked down as he positioned himself at my entrance and I took in a deep breath in anticipation. "I love you, Harry." He said again, kissing me.

I kissed him back, but then pulled away, throwing my head back in a moan as Louis entered me. He felt so good inside of me, and I felt so full with him fully inside now. He froze once he was all the way in, and our eyes met. We were both panting heavily, breathless and shaking slightly from how intense the meaning behind this meant. It wasn't another fuck, it was love. Louis was making love to me. The thought made my head spin.

"Y-you can m-move now." I stuttered out, and Louis nodded. He pulled out a bit before pushing back in, making us both gasp and moan. This whole experience was unreal, and it made all of my senses seem to be maximized to the fullest. Every single thing was so sensitive.

He pulled out further and pushed in, making me yell out as he hit my prostate. "Louis! Please, Louis!" I begged, wanting him to hit that same spot again. He nodded as he pulled out and pushed back in again, thrusting repeatedly and hitting the same area. I was a mess of moans underneath him. Everything felt amazing.

His thrusts got faster, but they were still loving and caring, not complete and utter harshness like they use to be. As much as I enjoyed the rough sex we had, this was far better. I felt every part of Louis, hands traveling all over his body as his did the same. 

I closed my eyes, just letting the feelings take over. I loved Louis so much, and to know that he loved me too made me feel like I was weightless. Nothing could drag me down drom the height I was at.

"I love you, Harry. I love you, I love you, I love you." He repeated several times, and I felt myself close to my release. "I love you, too, Louis. I- I'm so close." I said and Louis began to go faster, giving me all he had.

My stomach muscles tightened as I couldn't contain myself anymore. "Louis!" I yelled out and he came as well, yelling out my name. He laid on top of me as soon as we both came down from our highs.

"I love you." He said, pecking my lips. I smiled sleepily at him and said "I love you, Louis. So much." This was perfect.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LOUIS

I couldn't go to sleep, and I couldn't stop smiling. Harry and I made love. Not just once, but repeatedly. It was everything to me. I never thought I could love someone, and I certainly never thought someone could ever love me. Harry was just amazing.

I just laid in bed, holding Harry in my arms and gently rubbing his back with one hand as I laid on my back and stared at the ceiling. I was just remembering how everything felt so surreal, but I knew it was happening. Every touch was so caring, every moan, gasp, and word so meaningful, every 'I love you' full of hope and care. And I was so lucky to have this beautiful boy in my arms. My beautiful boy.

I was so wrapped up in all these thoughts, but they all fled my mind when I heard Harry whining in his sleep. He was moving around a bit and seemed to be having a bad dream. He was whining more and then I noticed small tears falling from his eyes. It hurt to ever see him sad, but seeing him cry killed me.

"Harry." I whispered at first, kissing his head and trying to gently wake him up. He continued to whine, but then he started thrashing around and I heard him whimpering. He was kicking and punching, and he hit my in the lip and stomach a few times. I sat up in bed and pulled him into my arms, shaking him and calling his name.

"Harry! Harry, baby, wake up, love. Wake up! Let me see your beautiful eyes." I said, and then he jumped in his sleep before he sat up and looked around in confusion. He turned to me, tears running down his cheeks.

"Louis." He whispered before he began to cry. I pulled him into my arms, and he held onto me tightly. "They tried to take me away from you!" He cried. "You didn't want me to go, and you tried to grab me, I tried to ran to you, but there were so many of them, a-and... I don't want to leave you, Louis.... They tried to make me leave you." He sobbed. My heart hurt at how terrified he was of the dream, but I had to reassure him that everything was fine.

"Shhh. Shhh, Harry. You're okay, love. I'm still here. Nobody's here to get you. Who were the people in your dream?" I asked him gently, trying not to make him even more upset than he clearly was already.

"My mum and dad, my family, police, everyone. Everyone was pulling us away from each other. It started because I missed my parents and wanted to spend some time with them for my birthday. I tried to tell them that you made me happy, but they didn't listen. They pulled me away." He said.

I tensed up a bit at the fact that Harry was probably homesick. The thought of him aching for home made me upset. I wanted him here, but I didn't want him hurting. I gulped before I asked my question. "Ha-Harry, do you... do you want to go home?" I asked.

"NO!" He cried as he clung onto me tightly. "No, Louis! Please no. Don't make me go home. I need you. I love you so much. Please don't get rid of me. Please. I love you." He cried, and I held him closer, lifted his chin so he was looking at me.

"Hey, I would never want you to leave. I would never push you away. Ever. You make me so happy, Harry. I love you so much my beautiful boy. I was just making sure you didn't regret the decision to stay here. To stay with me."

He shook his head and said "Never. I will never regret staying here with you. I love you." He said. I smiled at him and pecked his forehead saying "I" then pecked his nose with a "love" I kissed one check "you" and then the other "too" before pressing my lips to his.

He giggled, and his happiness made me smile wider. "I love you." I promised. "And nobody will ever take you away." He nodded and laid on my chest as I rubbed his back until he fell asleep, a bit frightened because I knew that if his parents found him, I could do nothing to keep him here.


	23. Zayn's Past

LIAM

"LIAM!" I heard my name being called. I groaned, feeling so cold and tired. I just wanted to get back to bed, so I put my pillow over my head, but was called yet again by Louis. "LIAM!" I groaned and got out of bed this time.

I quickly got dressed and then walked into the kitchen where he was with Harry and Niall. They all sat around the table looking a bit upset. I was so confused. What did I miss while I was asleep?

"What's wrong? Why do you all look so upset?" I asked. Louis didn't look too effected, but he kept glancing at Harry, who seemed rather upset right now. Niall also seemed upset, but he also seemed angry. Why?

"Zayn won't come out of his room. He's like in there crying. Harry and I tried talking to him, but he wouldn't let us know anything, and when Niall tried he just yelled at him. We were...um, I guess we were hoping you'd talk to him." Louis said. "Would you?"

"Why me?" I asked. I didn't understand. I thought if Zayn would've spoken to anyone, it would've been Harry. "Hasn't he already proven that he doesn't want to speak with anybody at the moment?" I pointed out.

Louis sighed and said "Look, Liam, we all know that something obviously happened between you and Zayn when you spent the night in that hotel. We're not blind! And ever since then he's been following you like a little lost puppy. You might not see it, but he's obviously obsessed with you, so you go see what's wrong with him and fix it!" Louis had a bit of anger in his tone, but he seemed to calm down again as Harry gently touched his arm. That boy had a huge effect on Louis.

"I'm sorry." He said with another sigh before he said "Just, will you see what's wrong with him? It sucks to see him so upset." The fact that Louis actually noticed that Zayn was upset and actually cared meant that he has changed a lot. Harry changed him. I knew they were in love, and that sucked for me, but I was happy for them.

"I guess I can. Sure." I said, and they all looked at me with thankful expressions. Harry mouthed 'thank you', and I nodded before leaving to Zayn's room. I've never been inside of Zayn's room, so this was new to me. It felt strange, but there was an odd feeling in my stomach... excitement? At what it would look like? I have no idea.

I walked to the door and knocked on it, hearing Zayn's sobs from the other side. "What?" He said, trying to make his broken voice sound annoyed. It was clear that he something was wrong with him, and I didn't like that he tried to push us all away when we could help him out.

"Um, Zayn... it's Liam. C-Can I come in?" I asked. I heard him sniffle a bit before he croaked out a 'no'. I was a bit confused by the amount of hurt I felt from being told no by him. I thought he would actually want to talk to me.

"Please, Zayn." I found myself begging. "I just wanna see if you're okay."

"I'm fine!" He cried, and it hurt when I heard his voice break a bit. Something was seriously wrong with him, and I wanted to be the person to make it better. I just needed to be that person, though I can't explain why.

"Damn it, Zayn. If you aren't going to let me in then I'm breaking down the door!" I said, a bit harsher than I have ever spoken to anybody. It was just driving me insane that he wouldn't just communicate with me.

I waited for a while, hearing nothing on the other side of the door. He didn't give a response, and I didn't footsteps coming towards the door either. It was silent, not even a sniffle escaping the room. Was he ignoring me? Did he think I was bluffing?

I sighed before backing up, getting ready to kick the door in, but then I heard soft footsteps and soon the door unlocked and opened slowly, revealing the darkness in the room but Zayn's face remained hidden, except for his eye. His eye seemed to shine in the darkness.

"What do you want, Liam?" He asked quietly. I walked closer to the door, and he tried to close it a bit, but I pressed my hand against it to keep it in its place. He would not just close the door on me.

"First, I want to come in. Then I want you to tell me what's going on with you. Why are you crying, why did you yell at Niall, and why aren't you coming out of your room?" I questioned.

"That doesn't matter. Please just leave me alone." He said, looking down at the floor, but I shook my head before pushing the door open. Zayn stumbled back a bit, but I got into the room and closed the door, immediately being consumed in the darkness of the room.

I heard Zayn let out a small sob, knowing that he was crying. Maybe I shouldn't have just barged in when he was in this mood, but I was really worried about him right now. He needed someone, and I would be that someone for him.

I walked closer to him and gently touched his arm before he flinched back. "Don't touch me, Liam. Please don't touch me right now." He said. I just thought that he really could use the comfort that came with physical contact.

"Why Zayn? You're clearly hurt and someone holding you wouldn't hurt when you just need someone to-" I tried reasoning before he lost it and cut me off.

"BECAUSE I'M DISGUSTING! OKAY!?" He yelled and then fell to the floor crying into his knees. Seeing him this way hurt me. What was he talking about? He was disgusting? Zayn was probably one of the most beautiful people on the planet. Anyone would be lucky to have him as theirs, even me, so why was I being so stupid about not accepting his feelings for me?

"Zayn, that isn't true. You're an incredible human being. Who told you that?" I asked as I sat down across from him on the floor, our knees almost touching but not quite.

"It. Doesn't. Matter. Liam." He said, making each word a statement. I wouldn't let him push me away though. I would get to the bottom of this.

"Why did you yell at Niall?" I asked. "Is it because he was being as persistent as me right now?" I asked and Zayn gave a dry chuckle before responding.

"No. He thought I was upset because you didn't return the feelings I had for you. Stupid, huh? Why should I be upset? Not like we've had anything or are even in love. Just fucked a couple times." He said, almost trying to make himself convinced of that. It hurt me.

Why am I now realizing how much Zayn does mean to me? Why now when he seems so broken? Why do I just crave to touch and hold him close and whisper sweet nothings to him until he's okay again?

"It's not about that, is it? It's something more. Something that has bothered you for a really long time because it wouldn't affect you this much if it just happened. Tell me, please. I just... I want you to be okay. I know I've been an asshole about ignoring you these past few days, but I just didn't know how to... you know. I do want you happy though, Zayn." I said.

We sat in silence. It was so quiet you could hear a pen drop. It wasn't uncomfortable though. The air between us was full of misery, curiosity, fear, and hopefulness. So we sat in silence, until Zayn finally spoke.

"It happened years ago, but I just can't let it go. I remember every single detail about it. It was the most terrifying experience of my life. I never told anyone because... because I'm so ashamed." He said, voice falling as he said those last four words.

"You can tell me, Zayn. I could never be ashamed in you. Please tell me." I begged. He seemed so hesitant, and I knew how I could get it out of him. I needed him to be vulnerable to me in all forms. I scooted closer to him and reached out to him, he shook his head and pulled away quickly.

"Stop! Please stop." He cried out. It hurt that he wouldn't even let me hold him, but maybe he would tell me if I could just touch him a bit.

"Can I just... hold your hand?" I asked. He was so very hesitant, looking down at his hand before looking back at mine. My eyes adjusted to the darkness by now and I was just so captivated by the beautiful, stunning human infront of me, tears pouring out of his eyes making them appear to sparkle.

He nodded, holding his hand out. I took it in both of mine and brought it to my lips, kissing it gently. He gulped and asked "Liam, what are you doing? Please don't do that. I'm already going through this fucking memory that can't escape me. I don't need your goddamn mixed messages, too!" He cried.

Mixed messages? Oh God. I was sending him mixed messages and it was especially stupid to do that now. What was wrong with me? But I knew what was wrong. I did like Zayn. I liked him a lot. Hell, it felt like I loved him, but why now? Why when he was so broken?

"Nothing mixed about it, Zayn." I finally said. He looked at me in shock as I sloely leaned into him. My eyes drifted down to look at his lips. They were perfection. The looked so pink, so kissable, so sinful, so addictive. I craved the taste of them, and I knew that Zayn would let me.

I closed the space between us with a deep and passionate kiss, letting Zayn get how I felt through the language of the kiss. I felt his cheeks fill with tears again, and I wiped them away as I pulled back whispering "Tell me what's wrong, please." He gave a slight nod, and I was so thankful.

"It was... it was after I dropped college. I was in a gang and we sold drugs." He began, and I was already shocked. He was in a gang? They sold drugs? What? Nevertheless, I let him continue.

"One drop went a bit dirty. The guy didn't have enough money to pay, so we were ordered to beat him. I just couldn't do it. I literally stood there in shock as the two other guys with me beat the living hell out of him. He was almost dead by the time they finished. They walked off, but I apologized, called 911 and all before I left, making sure to leave no trace of us being there. It was never for me- the gang life. I don't like hurting people, but I needed the money. After that experience though, I had enough.

"I told them that I wanted to leave the gang. They told me that nobody leaves. It was too much of a risk. I remember the exact words the leader said." Zayn shivered before he spoke the words. "He said 'The door is there, but if you walk out of it, nothing will stop us from hurting you and everyone you love.' He said it so sinisterly, and I knew he meant it, but I thought I could protect everyone. Besides, my parents didn't even have contact with me anymore. They kicked me out as soon as they heard about the gang." He said it as if he didn't care, but the way he lowered his head said that he deeply missed his mum and dad.

"Everything was okay for a while, two weeks tops I would say, but then my world came crashing down." He paused, looking at down at our hands. I felt his shaking in mine and I knew this part was hard for him. I squeezed his hand gently, letting him know I was here. He gave out a shaky sigh and took a breath before continuing.

"My youngest sister was walking home from a friend's house- I told my parents not to let her out alone- and they followed her. They knew how much she meant to me. They knew it. And I- I should have been there! I should have fucking protected her! But I wasn't there at all! I can just imagine her screams and her eyes full of terror and pain. They stabbed her. Twenty three times." He said between clenched teeth. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to block out the memory.

"They texted me where to find her, horrible messages just taunting about how they hurt her. I rushed to the address, finding her bleeding out on the ground. It was awful. She was giving small, weak whimpers and I was panicking trying to stop the blood, and I was trying everything I could, and I was gonna call the cops, I was, but I- she- I didn't-" He was rambling, shaking and panicking as he spoke about it.

"Zayn, calm down. Please calm down." I said, rubbing my thumb on his hand. Tears were pouring out of his eyes as at alarming rate. He was so torn up about his past. How long has he been like this? I thought back to previous years and realized that there was one day in each that Zayn was locked up in his room all day. How were we so blind to it?

"I was going to call the cops, but she grabbed my arm and said my name. I stopped and looked at her, trying to press down to stop the blood, but there was so much. I leaned in as she spoke. She said 'It's okay, Zee. Tell mum and dad I love them. I love all of you. I love you. Thanks for being... such a great big brother.' And then she just... she just stopped breathing." He said.

"A great big brother?" He scoffed. "I couldn't even save her life." He wiped tears away and went on. "They messaged me again, saying the same thing would happen to all of my sisters unless I paid the price for leaving. I said I would, and they texted me an address to go to. I went, thinking they would beat the shit out of me and threaten me. Hurt me and call it a day. What they did was far worse." He said. It fell silent again as Zayn let more tears fall. I hated seeing him this way, and I wanted to just take all the pain away.

I leaned closer to him and wiped his tears away gently. I looked into his eyes, those beautiful amber eyes that I could get lost in. "What did they do to you, Zayn?" I whispered, not sure if I wanted to know the answer.

"They raped me." He choked out, and rage filled me within. How the hell could somebody hurt him like that!? He was such a beautiful, kind person. He was mine! Nobody should ever have laid a finger on him. It finally made sense why he couldn't bottom. And... and he trusted me enough to bottom.

"There were five of them. It happened so fast, and I just remember a burning sensation, all the pain as they took me raw. It was horrible and it hurt so fucking bad. They said such vile things as they did it, too. They said I was worthless. I was dirty. I was disgusting. I was a slut that asked for it all those years because I struted around the hangout like I owned the place. They said that they knew I wanted it. They said I was ruined and that nobody could live me when they were done. And they were right." He said. Hearing him say that made my heart hurt. No, that wasn't true. I loved him. I loved Zayn. I loved him so much. I am so stupid to only see it now. That's why it hurt so badly when he acted like nothing ever happened between us. I tried forgetting him just like he tried to forget me, only I was better at it.

"No! They weren't right. They were so wrong, Zayn. You didn't deserve any of that. God, I wish I would have known sooner what you went through, and I'm so sorry I haven't been here for you, but they were wrong. Zayn, I love you. I'm not saying it out of pity like you may be thinking right now. I'm being completely honest. I'm just sorry it took me so long to realize it and be by your side, but I love you, Zayn Malik. I love you, and I promise to be here for you from now on." I declared.

He cried and shook his head. "But- but I'm digusting and ruined and unloveable. They said-" He began, and I cut him off.

"Fuck them! They were horrible people. I love you." I said. He pulled his hand out of mine and cried into his hands, and I missed holding his already. "Can I... can I hold you, Zayn? Please?" I asked quietly.

I sat in silence and waited for an answer. He finally nodded, and I immediately wrapped my arms around him and held him close, closing my eyes and just enjoying the feeling of having him in my arms. I needed to protect him from ever getting hurt again, from ever feeling pain, and from ever feeling unloved.

"I love you, Zayn." I whispered, kissing him head.

"I love you, too, Liam." He replied through sobs, and my heart beat sped up. I felt his whole body shaking, but I just held him close as he cried it out, listening to me whisper encouraging words to him.

I held him close to me until he fell asleep, and I smiled down at his peaceful face. I pressed a soft kiss to his beautiful lips and then rested my head on his. I loved Zayn, and I knew that everything would be okay now.


	24. Healing Love

HARRY

"Do you think Zayn is going to be okay?" I asked, breaking the silence at the table we sat at. I could tell we were all worried for him, even Niall. He was just always one to worry when others were upset.

"Yes." Louis said. Nothing more came, and the silence fell again until Niall took over.

"How can you be so sure though? He looked and sounded so broken. He looked like he wanted to just end everything. He didn't look well at all!" Niall said, getting a bit upset by Louis's one worded response, but I trusted Louis's judgement.

He slammed his fist on the table and Niall jumped at the sudden noise, but I expected it. Louis looked pissed, but he also looked scared and upset for Zayn. Regardless of what he would say, I knew that deep down he cared about both Liam and Zayn, and seeing one of them so broken made him feel the same way. Made him feel powerless.

"I think I know that, Niall. I saw him, too! But if there's one thing I do know it's that Zayn is strong. Fuck, he's a strong person. Probably a lot stronger than me. Know how I know that? Because he was the first one that had to live alone with me and deal with all of my bullshit! He had to deal with all my moods and all my yelling and shit, and he made it through. He couldn't stop them, but he made it through. Then Liam came. And when Liam came it was like his world just got a little brighter. I saw the relief basically written all over his face, and his eyes always held adoration when he looked at him. I could tell that he liked him so much. They spent one night together, he went into the room and didn't come out 'til morning. His whole exterior changed. He was hardened a bit on the outside, but his eyes always betrayed him. He loved Liam. I could tell. And now that he is in there with him, I believe that he will be fine because as much as Liam probably wouldn't admit it, I just know that he has to love Zayn back." Louis ranted passionately. Niall nodded slowly, eyes wide as he took in everything.

Louis then whispered "He has to love him back. He has to," before he stood up and left the kitchen, leaving Niall and I alone. I immediately wanted to run after him, but Niall spoke up, so I listened.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I didn't realize how upset that would make him. I guess... I don't know. I guess Louis isn't a total heartless bastard like I thought he was in the beginning. He actually cares about things." He said.

"I know. You just have to give him a chance and you see the amazing person he is inside. And I know you didn't mean to upset him or make a bad situation worse. Don't worry. I'll talk to him." I said.

"Yeah. He'll definitely feel better after that." Niall said in a bit of a bitter tone. I sighed, and Niall's face dropped. "I'm sorry, Harry. I shouldn't have said that. I know that you love him and he loves you, and trust me, I'm trying to move on, but I can't do it immediately. I can't when I have to constantly see you with him all happy and stuff. It's gonna be hard, and it's gonna be a while." He said.

"I know, Niall. Nobody's trying to rush you, and I'm sorry if it's hurting you. I'm gonna go check on him now. Talk to you later?" I asked and he nodded with a small smile. I stood up and left the room as well, following where Louis went.

I went to our room and saw the door to the toilet room opened. I looked at the mirror, seeing Louis put water on his face and then looked at me through the mirror. He gave me a small smile before turning to me and leaning against the counter.

"I'm sorry that I erupted like that, Haz. I know I promised to try and control them, but I just don't want to think of anybody ever giving up on life. Especially not Zayn." He said, sounding so sincere.

"I know. I understood that right away. You've known him for so long and it would be completely insane if you didn't react like that." I said as I walked towards him and stood infront of him. He wrapped his arms around my waist as mine wrapped around his neck, looking him in the eyes.

"You're not mad or upset with me?" He questioned, seeming both hopeful and confused at the same time. I shook my head with a small smile and he smiled right back, probably thankful I wasn't mad or disappointed.

"I couldn't be. I'd probably react the same way if I was in your shoes. If it was my close friend. If Niall was that upset, I would always believe he'd be okay. You're actually amazing for knowing how strong Zayn truly is." I said, and he just leaned in and kissed me.

I closed my eyes and let his control the kiss. I've gotten so familiar with the shape and taste of his lips that I never even wanted another pair to ever touch my own. He was my addiction, and though it was probably really dumb, I couldn't stop falling more each day.

He pulled back with a smile and said "I love you so much, Harry." He nuzzled his nose against mine, and I giggled a bit. I love the fact that Louis has gotten a lot more playful and gentle ever since we truly confessed our love for each other.

"I love you, too, Louis." I promised, cuddling into his chest a bit as he held me close to him, leaving small kisses on my head as he began to speak to me.

"I'm really thankful to have you, Haz. You know that right? Or you should know that. You've changed me in so many ways, babe, and I really care so much for you. I never want to lose you or let anyone ever hurt you, so promise me that if something evee gets to you as much as whatever this is is getting to Zayn that you'll tell me. That you'll talk to me. Please promise me that because I never want to see you that hurt ever." He said.

I nodded, feeling so safe and warm in Louis's arms right now. He hugged me a little tighter and one hand went up to play with my hair. "Have you ever thought so negatively before? You know, like about what Niall said. How he looked ready to end it all. Have you ever thought like that before?"

I froze a bit in his arms, not knowing if I should lie or tell him the truth. Should I make things up or be honest with Louis. I mean, I trusted him with my life, so why not just let it all out now? I was terrified though. I've nevee told this to anybody, not even Niall.

I lightly nodded against his chest, and I felt him tense up before hugging me tight. "Fuck!" He whispered in an upset tone. I looked up at him and saw that his eyes were getting watery. He truly cared about me and that meant so much.

"I'm sorry I said anything, Lou. I just... you asked, and I didn't want to lie-" I tried to reason, feeling bad for making him so upset right now when Zayn was upset as well.

"It's okay, baby. I'm the one who asked, love. Um, can you... can you tell me why you felt that way? And when?" He asked, and I nodded before grabbing his hand and pulling us both over to the bed.

I sat us both down and then Louis held me close again as I began to speak. "Well, back home everyone thought I was perfect. You know? I had the rich parents, the loving home, the loyal friend, the large house, the 'good looks', and people wanted to be me. I never knew why. They glorified everything I owned or had. My parents were rich, but they went out on business trips a lot. That was less time with them. My home was loving, but only when they were there. My friend was loyal, but he was in love with me, and I could never return that love because I couldn't make my heart feel that way for him. He was just that... my best friend. And it sucked rejecting him repeatedly. The house was large, but it was hollow with barely any substance. It mocked me when I was alone. They said I was beautiful, adorable, hot, whatever, but I never believed them all. They glorified it all." I said. I felt Louis squeeze me in his arms a bit, probably trying not to interrupt my words like he wanted to.

"Nobody ever truly got to know me, nobody but Niall, but he knew me before it became all about the looks and the money. That's all people would pay attention to, and it got lonely. I got tired of faking like it didn't hurt being alone in an empty house with only your thoughts lulling around in your head. It was torture to me, but also a bit pleasing to a mad man. It was a safe haven, yet a place for the demons to come out.

I used to sit in my room, looking across at the mirror that hung in the corner. I would look at myself closely and scrutinize every single thing that I absolutely dispised and hated. It got really bad. Sometimes I would just stare at the mirror and cry because I knew I was nothing. People wouldn't like me if I didn't have the things I had. It was superficial- the things they craved. I didn't want it anymore." I took a deep breath and went on.

"So I would sit in the room and stare at my reflection. Everyday it got harder to do becasue the list of my dislikes got longer and longer, but I couldn't just not do it. It was a harmful addiction almost. Masochistic I guess. And I grew to hate myself. Every inch of myself. But I kept a smile on my face and went on as if things were fine. One day though, it got bad." This would be a hard to tell. Nobody knew about it, and I always hoped nobody would, but I had Louis now, and I wanted to be completely honest with him.

"Take your time." Louis said in a bit of a pained, raspy voice. I knew this was probably hard for him to hear, but I had to get it out, and he was allowing me that favor. I knew he was here for me and that gave me such comfort.

"My parents were on a business trip when it happened. Gone for a week and three days. It was the last day of their trip, and I was just so tired of staring at the mirror, so tired of the smile on my lips, so tired of being alone. I was just done. Done and tired. They never stayed at home for more than a month anyway, and I thought 'It'd be so much easier if they had nothing to leave behind'.

"I started thinking about suicide. Crying, walking back in forth in front of the mirror and thinking of how to do it. There were so many ways, but I didn't want it to be bloody. Not at all. I didn't want others to be put under that horrendous vision once they found me. I wasn't that uncaring. So, I thought of pills. Pills were easy. Pills were clean." I said, remembering how hopeless I felt in that moment.

I took a bottle from my mum's restroom, painkillers- ironic- and stood in front of the mirror. I took one pill for every little thing I hated about myself. My hair was too curly. My eyes were too dull. My skin was too dry. My lips were too thin. My nose was too big. My stomach was too pudgy. My thighs were too fat. My feet were too big. My voice was too slow. My hands were too large. My parents didn't care if they left me. I was alone in this house. I was loved for money. I hurt my best friend. I disappointed others. I didn't have a future. I had no potential, I had nobody to love me, I couldn't love anyone, I was a lost cause, I was stupid, I was useless, I was forgotten, I was left behind." My voice rose as the list went on and on, all the vile thoughts about myself coming back to me. I remembered how much I hated myself, and thinking about the way I looked now made me want to oull out of Louis's grip and hide my face. He was so beautiful, and I was nothing special.

"I was a spoiled bitch, I tried too hard to make others like me, no one truly liked me, I didn't even like me! I knew that I could never be loved! Nobody could ever love me! NOBODY LOVES ME!" I yelled, pulling away from Louis and standing up as I began to pace back and forth, tugging at my hair as all the memories came back.

"Nobody loves me. Nobody loves me. Nobody loves me." I mumbled. My eyes caught my movement reflected in the restroom mirror, and I stopped and looked. Nasty tears streamed down my cheeks, and I hated my reflection.

"I hate you." I whispered, then louder. "I HATE YOU!" I yelled at myself. I hated myself so much.

"Harry, please stop-" Louis tried. I could tell he was crying by the way he spoke, but my eyes never left the mirror. "YOU SHOULD HAVE DIED THAT DAY YOU ASSHOLE! YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKING KILLED YOURSELF! BUT NO! YOU COULDN'T DO THAT RIGHT! YOU HAD TO THROW THE FUCKING PILLS UP BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO SCARED TO LEAVE! I FUCKING HATE YOU! NOBODY LOVES YOU! NOBODY LOVES YOU!" I yelled.

I saw Louis walked to the mirror as I was yelling, and I couldn't stop him as he smashed it with a rinsing cup. I just yelled and then crumpled to the floor in tears. "Nobody loves me." I cried.

Louis came to me and pulled me into his arms. I whimpered at his gentle touch and he kissed me lightly. "I love you, Harry. I love you so much. Hearing that story makes me so fucking upset. It hurts to know you don't see the perfection that I see." He said.

"Why do you love me?" I asked in a strained voice. Why did he? I was useless and stupid.

"For many reasons. I love you for how kind you are. I love you for how you can brighten anyone's day. I love you for how you always put others first. I love you for existing. I love you for saving me. I love you for making me feel so many amazing emotions. I love you for being you. I love you so much, Harry. So much it hurts. But I love the pain if it means getting to hold you forever and always. I love you. You're beautiful to me. You're perfect. You're amazing. I love your curls, and your bright green eyes, and your adorable nose." He tapped it with his finger, and I giggled a bit as a smile grew on his face.

"I love your full lips. They are so kissable and damn right addictive. I love your body. It may not be as fit as you want it to be, but I love every part of it. I love the way it fits perfectly with mine the most. I love everything about you. Even the broken pieces." He said, and now I was crying out of happiness from his beautiful words.

"What if... my broken pieces fit together with yours?" He asked, and I looked up at him. He was such an incredible human being. "My heart..." He said, taking my hand and placing it over his chest, right where I can feel his heart beat, "just so happens to fit right in yours." He said, touching my chest in the same spot. "They only beat each other's names. And I love that. I love you." I declared one last time.

We sat there staring into each other's eyes, just feeling each other's heart beats. I paid close attention, founding that they seemed to beat to the same rhythm. It was a beautiful harmony. It was magical. It was love.

"I love you, too." I said, and Louis smiled at me. He leaned in, closing the distance between, and pulled me into a kiss. Our lips fit perfectly together. It was like nothing else mattered. The past didn't matter anymore. Those toxic thoughts fled my mind. Louis said I was perfect to him and that's all I could ever want.

I was perfect to him and he was perfect to me. I loved him, and, by some miracle, he loved me, too. I felt like all those years of feeling lonely and unloved, all those years of feeling like something was wrong with me because I didn't feel attracted to anyone else, I felt like they didn't matter anymore. I know that I was waiting for Louis now. He is the answer to everything that ever hurt me in life. He has taken it all and fixed it. Here and now, this was very clear to me. Louis was my world.

We broke apart and then Louis held me, my head resting on his chest, listening to his heartbeat thumping. He hummed a little song to me and I felt safe and protected. I never wanted to lose my world.


	25. Stockholm Syndrome

HARRY

     Yesterday was very eventful and tiring. I woke up in Louis's arms, my eyes feeling heavy from the tears and from crying myself to sleep. I could only imagine how Zayn felt. He was crying all day long. I was still very worried about him, and I would talk to him about it, but right now I felt so warm and safe with Louis by my side.

   I snuggled deeper into his arms and inhaled his scent. I remembered that awful dream I had where I was being taken away from him, ripped out of his arms and strewn away by the people I thought I wanted to go back to when I first got here.

  It was strange how all of that has changed. I wanted nothing more than to return home to my mum and dad and go back to my life, but now I wanted nothing more than to stay in Louis's arms forever. I know now that if I would have gone back home, I would still feel the same way I always did- numb, regretful, unloveable.

   I felt a tear roll down my cheek at the very thought of how broken up I was before Louis. I was about to move to wipe it away when I felt the pad of Louis's thumb come up to my cheek and wipe it instead.

   I looked up at him and he looked down at me with a small smile. "You're okay, love. Why are you crying?" He asked. He was just so caring and beautiful that it was hard to believe I ever thought of him as mean and nothing more than an angry soul. Not evil though. Never evil.

   "I just... I am so thankful to have you in my life, Louis. Yes, it happened in a sort of twisted way, but I think it was destiny that we were supposed to meet. You said yourself that I helped you actually feel things instead of living a life of anger, and you've helped me, too. You've brought me out of that dark place I was in when I was at home. I felt so alone, so horrid, and so unloved, but you took all that away and made me feel like I had someone here, like I was beautiful, and I know that you love me with everything you have. And I love you, too, Louis. I love you more than anything." I said, not being able to stop the tears from falling. I really loved it, and I could never say or think it enough.

   "God, I love you." Louis breathed out before he leaned in and attached our lips together. "God, Harry, I love you so goddamn much." He said, pressing our lips together again. There was so much emotion involved, and it felt amazing.

   I could feel myself getting excited as Louis's tongue wondered into my mouth and explored. I moaned into the kiss and then broke away and whispered "L-Lou, I want you. Fuck, I need you so bad, baby."

  He whimpered at my already broken voice and nodded his head. "Yeah, me, too, Haz. Fuck. I need to be in you already." He then began to trail kisses down my jaw as he spoke. "You drive me mad. You're all that's ever on my mind and it's so infuriating, but I love it. I love you."

   I allowed myself to let go and fully enjoy the feeling of Louis. Louis's lips, Louis's touch, Louis's feathery hair as it made slight contact with my cheek, just... Louis! He was everywhere and everything.

   His fingers trailed up my stomach and then slowly pulled me shirt up, pulling it off of my body. I took a deep breath as I felt his fingers trail down my chest to the beginning of my boxers. He was just so endearing.

   "You are so beautiful, Harry. It hurts to know that you think you aren't. It hurts to know that you thought you were unloveable because you are literally my whole world now. I would do anything to make you happy." He said as he began to take my pants off.

   His hands then removed his clothing as well, revealing his gorgeous tan skin to my needy eyes. Louis was perfect in every way. I could never, ever get enough of him, and I hope he felt the same way about me.

   Soon we were both dully undressed and Louis laid me down ever so gently. He kissed me gently, and I closed my eyes, sighing at the satisfying sensation of his lips on mine. "I love you, Harry." He whispered as he broke apart. He leaned back to position his tip at my entrance. I took a deep breath as I felt him push in.

  I let out a low moan at the feeling on being full and he growled at the feeling of being inside me. "I-I love you, too, Louis." I barely managed to say, pleasure completely consuming my body and sending me to a new type of high.

  Soon the stillness became too tortorous. "Move, please." I begged Louis, and he obliged. He slowly pulled out a bit before pushing back in, thrusting into me a bit faster and deeper every single time.

   I yelped at he hit my prostate dead on, making me completely melt at every touch. All of my senses heightened and it was just Louis, Louis, Louis, Louis. He was all I could sense right now. All I could feel, see, hear, smell, taste as he kissed me passionately.

   I kissed him back, loving the feeling of being loved. He then kissed down my jawline and I fisted his hair in my hand as his hands grabbed the back of my thighs, pulling me in as he thrusted deeper and faster into me.

   I moaned out, feeling my climax coming soon, and I wanted to delay it as long as I could, making this play out for a much longer period of time. I couldn't contain it for much longer though.

   "Fuck, Harry. You feel so good, babe. God, I love you." Louis breathed out through pants of breath. Sweat was glistening on his skin as he continued to make love to me, and he looked absolutely beautiful. Flushed cheeks, eyes full of lust and love, tan skin with prominent tattoos. I should ask him what those meant.

  He gave a paticularly harsh thrust, and I screamed at the feeling. I bit his shoulder, trying to muffle myself a bit, but I knew Louis loved to hear how he made me feel.

  "You don't wanna yell for me, Hazza? Don't want the lads to know just how much we love each other?" He whispered, and that was it. I came undone, yelling a string of Louis's name mixed with cuss words.

  "Fuck. So beautiful." He said, and it wasn't long until he followed right along, letting out several 'I love you's' as he filled my up. He pulled out and laid right beside me, pulling me close and tracing invisible patters onto my back.

  "I love you, Lou." I said, yawning at how sleepy I was now.

  He gave a small hum and said "I love you, too. My beautiful boy." I couldn't help but smile before I shut my eyes and fell into a deep sleep.  
\------------------------------------------------------

    I knocked quietly on Zayn's door, hoping that he was awake so that I wasn't disturbing any much needed sleep. I waited patiently, standing and listening for an sounds of movement, but none came. Guess he's still asleep.

   I turned to walk away when the door was opened, but Liam waa standing there. They must have spent the night together. Did that mean anything, or was I just being hopeful for them? Yes, I did want them together because I've seen the hopeless look Zayn always had when Liam would ignore him or blow him off to start another conversation. It upset me, but it never seemed to impact Liam.

   "Hey, Li. Um, is Zayn awake?" I asked him. He turned his head back into the room, and I saw a fond smile play on his lips as I heard Zayn mumbled "I am now." 

   Liam turned back to me and said "Yeah. He's awake. You can come in if you'd like. I'm just going to get us something to eat." He said before moving out of the doorway and walking to the kitchen.

   I walked into the room and saw Zayn laying there on his stomach, face against the pillow. He sighed softly before flipping over to me, and he looked utterly exhausted. His eyes were a bit watery red-rimmed from crying all day yesterday, but it was slowly turning back to his tan skin color. His hair was messy, and he just seemed to still need sleep.

  "Hey, Harry. How is everyone?" He asked. I raised an eyebrow at him. That was who Zayn truly was. On the surface he was this bad boy who couldn't care less about anyone or anything, but once you've broken past that layer, he's this really caring guy who just wants someone else to care for him. He wants what every human being wants. Love.

   "We're fine. Actually, we're all just worried about you. Are you feeling okay?" I asked. He sat up in bed, resting his back on the headboard and thought for a while before he shrugged his shoulders.

   "I don't know." He breathed out. "I was at first. Liam talked to me and he even said he loved me." He said, stopping for a second, probably to remember those words leaving Liam's mouth, and I was happy for him. But why was unsure then?

   "I was so happy at first, just loving the fact that he said he loved me, but now a part of me doesn't think it's true. I mean, he's known how I felt about him for quite some time, and he's never returned the feeling. Then, he learns about the past I've had, and he says he loves me. I just can't shake the fact that it might just be pity or sympathy. Like he sees me as just a wounded animal that needs love to heal." He said, and it actually did make sense.

   "Wow. I never thought of that. Maybe you should talk to him about it." I suggested, and he quickly shook his head.

   "I can't do that. What if he mad at me or yells or... I don't know! I just don't wanna risk anything, you know?" He asked, looking completely hopeless. I heard what he was saying, but I think it went deeper than just upsetting Liam.

   "I see what you're doing, Zayn." I said, and he looked down in shame. "Hey, it's okay. You're scared. You're scared to talk to him about it because you're scared he'll realize he doesn't really love you and leave you, but you can't think that way. Liam could love you with all of his heart. I mean, did you see the fond smile he gave you this morning when you called to me that you were awake?" I said.

   "He did?" He asked, with the hope returning to his eyes, and I nodded. "Yeah. Okay. Maybe I should talk to him. But what do I-" He stopped talking as the door opened and Liam stepped into the room, sending me a smile before his gaze drifted to Zayn and his smile widened a bit. I saw the fond in his eyes- the love. I could tell that Liam did love him. They would be okay.

  "I'm gonna go talk to Niall. Give you two some privacy. I'm glad you're okay, Zayn." I said, hugging him tightly and whispering "Talk to him." I then gave him a pat on the shoulder and walked out of the room, hoping Zayn would talk to Liam so he wouldn't feel the way be currently does any longer. I just knew they would be okay.

   I walked down the hall and to the room that used to be mine. I hated ever going back into it because it made me so depressed, and I felt so cold and alone all the time. I wonder if Niall felt that way now?

  I knocked on the door a bit before I remembered that Louis still locked it because he didn't trust Niall to not try and escape yet. Just like he used to not trust me. I unlocked the door before walking inside. Niall turned to look at me and asked "Can I finally come out of this room now? I've been up for an hour."

  I felt bad, so I nodded. Niall stood from the bed and then we both walked into the kitchen. I began to look through cabinets and Niall leaned against the counter. I saw him looking towards the window with almost a longing look in his eyes. I knew he would rather be anywhere but here.

  "I'm sorry. I'm sorry you have to be here, Niall. I wish you could be at home, and I wish you could leave, but I just-" He cut me off as he slammed his hand against the counter, a loud smack emitting from it.

  "Don't give me that crap, Harry. We could both leave. We could even leave right now, but I just know that if I took one step towards the front door you would stop me, wouldn't you? You wouldn't waste a second before calling out for Louis or Zayn or Liam to stop me. You can say you wish I was home, but the truth is that you would rather keep me here than to risk losing your precious Louis!" He said.

  "It's not like that, Niall, and you know it!" I yelled. He rolled his eyes and turned away from me, but I kept on talking anyways. "You're my best friend, Niall. Why would I ever want you to be as unhappy as you seem to be right now?" I asked.

  "Was your best friend. Seems like everything's changed since you got here, Harry. If anything Liam is your best friend. You two seemed so close when I got here. I guess he helped you through things. Zayn. Zayn's like your protector. He's the intimidating one that anyone would be sorry to mess with. Then there's Louis. He's the only person you've ever managed to love. And he loves you back. There you go. You have a full circle of people here, so why would you even need me anymore?" He asked.

  "Because they haven't been by my side through everything over the yeats. Maybe Liam and I are good friends, but he can't replace the years you and I have been best friends. Maybe Zayn can protect me, but he hasn't stopped bullies from messing with me as a child. And I do love Louis, but that's different. I still love you, Niall. Just not in that way." I said.

  "I know that, Harry! But the point is we could leave! We could leave, and you don't want to! I know that I'm not you. I don't know how strong your feelings are for Louis, but I'm not so worried about you loving someone over me. What has me worried is my family. My mum and dad." He said, voice sounding like he was on the verge of tears.

  "Niall, it'll be okay." I said, trying to calm him down a bit. I walked over to him and tried to hug him but he ripped himself away from me.

  "That's easy for you to say. While your parents are looking for you, they won't have to worry about making enough money to maintain their lives. They own a business. They're rich as hell. My family has to work for every little thing. I know it's not anybody's fault that this is how it is, but they'd be so preoccupied, what if they don't make enough for rent?" He said.

  "My dad would always be glad to help out your family. He'll most likely give them some money if they needed anything-"

  "My dad wouln't take it!" He scoffed. "Has he ever?" He asked, and I knew the answer was no. He was too prideful to accept it. I see Niall's side of it now, but something just told me it would all be alright.

  "I know that, Niall. Your father wants to take care of his own family. I know that things seem so horrible right now, from this spot we're in, but I just have this feeling that everything is going to be okay. I can't explain why I feel this way, but I just do. And I don't have a single doubt in my mind that everything will be okay." He gave me a incredulous look and sighed.

  "I hope you're right. Still, what would you do if the police found us? It's not like you could just say you loved Louis and trusted the boys and everything would be alright. They'd still be guilty. And you can say whatever you want, Harry, but I know that you also miss your mum and dad. Maybe things weren't perfect at home, but it is still home. Somewhere deep down inside you want to go back home. You know how I know that?" He asked me.

  "No. How?" I asked. At this point I was just trying to keep a conversation going. I just didn't want Niall to yell. Talking this all through was the only way to get him to not yell.

  "Because I know you. You're right about that. We grew up together. Home if your sanctuary. You can say what you want, but you do miss home. This feeling of not being able to leave Louis is just an excuse to try and hold onto the one person you think you love. Remember that one lesson we had in the criminal investigations lab in science class? Stockholm Syndrome, Harry. The victim is manipulated into thinking they want to stay when they really don't. Think about that. Because the Harry I know loves home. Unless you're not the same Harry I know." He said before he pushed away from the counter and walked back to the room he was staying in.

  Stockholm Syndrome. No. That wasn't me. I wanted to stay. I wanted to stay because I love Louis. I know I love Louis. And he loved me just as much. Niall was being too critical about the situation. That was all. Yeah. That was all. It had to be.


	26. The Fear

LOUIS

I woke up to a cold, empty space beside me. I frowned, missing Harry's warmth already. I always looked forward to opening my eyes and seeing him just laying in my arms. Whether he was asleep or awake, it was always an amazing feeling. That feeling that you had everything you ever wanted in life.

I groaned, knowing he was probably in the kitchen making breakfast or something. I really didn't want to get out of bed, but the thought of being around Harry was a stronger force than the comfort of the bed. I got up and pulled on some sweatpants before I made my way to the door.

Everything was fine and quiet, until I heard Niall's voice. "The point is we could leave!" That made me heartbeat speed up? Leave? No. No no no no no. Harry can't leave. He can't leave me. He's all I've got. Harry means everything to me. Without him I'm that evil, vile person I've always been. I need Harry. Fuck! I love him! He can't leave!

I slid down the door, just trying to keep mysef calm, but nothing seemed to be working. I wanted to punch the wall and just yell and scream because he couldn't leave! He just... Fuck! He just can't! 

I opened the door and began to walk down the hall. I stopped when I heard Niall speak again. "We could leave, and you don't want to!" He didn't want to. Harry didn't want to leave me. That made me hopeful again. He didn't want to leave me.

I walked down the hallway and peeked around the corner. Harry and Niall were standing against the kitchen counter and Niall was doing most of the talking. I did feel a bit bad when I heard Niall talking about his family's money problems. His family was struggling and here I was using his best friend for ransom, or at least I was at first. That was before I fell in love with him.

My ears perked up as I heard something that sounded interesting come from Niall's mouth. "Remember that one lesson we had in the criminal investigations lab in science class? Stockholm Syndrome, Harry. The victim is manipulated into thinking they want to stay when they really don't. Think about that. Because the Harry I know loves home. Unless you're not the same Harry I know." I heard Niall's footsteps coming back towards the hall, so I quickly darted into the restroom door, waiting until his room door was closed before coming out.

Stockholm Syndrome? Did he really think I was manipulating Harry into wanting to stay? I even offered him a chance to go home. I love Harry more than anyone and anything. I would never play those mind games with him.

Shit! But what if Harry thought I was now? What if he's actually taking into account what Niall said? What if he does want to leave now? How would I respond to that? I loved Harry, and I didn't want to let him go, but I would I? Would I even be strong enough to?

I took a deep breath, not really wanting to think of ever losing Harry. I walked down the hall again and then to the kitchen, seeing Harry standing there as if he was thinking. Shit! That made me more worried than anything ever could. I don't know what I would do if he said he wanted to go home.

I tried to shake it off and act natural- as if I never heard their comversation. I walked up behind Harry and wrapped my as around his waist, kissing his cheek. "What are you thinking about, love?" I asked.

He smiled in my hold, a perfect dimple forming on his cheek. Harry is beauty in my eyes. Just complete beauty- inside and out. He was also my world, and he made me forget my worries as he turned in my arms and wrapped his arms around my neck.

"Well now I'm just thinking about how amazing you are. I love you, Louis." He said. I smiled at that, my heart seeming to beat at a whole new speed. He just made me feel so alive. It all felt so right to have him here.

"I love you, too, Harry. I am madly in love with you." I leaned in and kissed him deeply. He reacted immediantly, lips working against my own and making my head spin. He was simply intoxicating, and I will never get enough.

Unfortunately, he pulled back. "We should make some food because I'm pretty hungry." I laughed before nodding, pressing a kiss to his lips once more before we began to make some scrambled eggs.

While the big portion of my mind was on Harry, another part was busy thinking about Niall. He was deeply worried about hus family and stressed out about it. Maybe I should do something. Maybe I should find a way to help them out secretly. He was Harry's best friend, and I actually did want him to like and accept me. Who knows? Maybe doing this nice gesture will bring us there. I had to at least try. Try for Harry mainly because I knew he was worried as well.

"Now what are you thinking about?" He asked me. I smiled at him, playing the question off.

"Nothing. Nothing at all. Everything's perfect." I said as I pressed another kiss to his lips. At least I hope everything will be.  
\------------------------------------------------------

ZAYN

"Talk to him." Harry whispered before patting my shoulder and walking out of the room, leaving Liam and I alone. I would talk to him, but I just don't know how to. I felt like bringing it up would ruin anything.

"Good morning, lovely." Liam said as he sat on the bed, placing a plate of toast and a glass of orange juice on the nightstand. The nickname made my heart soar, but I couldn't help but look away. I just couldn't meet his eyes when all of this was floating through my mind.

"Hey, are you okay?" Liam asked, bringing his hand to my chin in order to turn my face towards him. I finally looked him in the eyes and nodded, trying my best to make it seem like everything was alright with me.

"Okay. Good because I don't like when you're upset." He said, caressing my cheek. He leaned in, his lips meeting my own in a soft kiss. It took my breath away, how gentle he was being, but I just couldn't lie about this anymore. It was so hard to lie and pretend things were alright.

I felt a tear slip down my cheek and I mentally cursed myself for letting that happen. Liam pulled back, looking at me with a mixture of confusion and sorrow on his features. His thumb wiped the tear away, and he said "Zayn, tell me what's wrong."

His voice was demanding, almost as demanding as Louis's use to always be, but I shook my head and said "Nothing. I'm fine." He clearly didn't believe me though because he raised his eyebrows and said "Tell me, Zayn. Please. I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you, and I will never want you to feel hurt, so please tell me what's wrong."

I closed my eyes, his words being so sweet and meaningful to me, but a part of me couldn't help but think he didn't truly mean it. "Zayn, please baby. I love y-"

"I can't do this, Liam!" I yelled, voice cracking a bit from how badly I wanted to cry. I couldn't take it. I couldn't take this lying to myself. I needed to know how he truly felt. No sympathy, just love. It's the only thing I craved from him.

"What do you mean? Do what?" He asked, scooting closer to me. I tried to back away from him, but he held my tightly near him. I just wanted to just go off and lose my shit on him, but I knew that wouldn't get me anywhere.

"This! Us! I can't do it! I need to know how you feel, Liam. I mean honestly feel. Because I can't help but think you don't really love me." I said. Liam looked shocked, then confused, and finally hurt. That hurt was the one thing I wanted to prevent, but I can't help but to be suspicious. It just felt so unreal to me.

"Wh-why do you think that? Did I do something wrong? Zayn, I'm sorry if I did something to make you feel like I don't love you becasue I really do. I really fucking do." He said, his voice almost begging me to believe him.

"Are you sure? Because a part of me feels like you're giving me nothing but sympathy. Like you see me as something that's broken that you need to fix. You never returned my feelings, Liam. Never. Not even back then because you said so yourself. So why now? Why when you see me at my lowest point? You need to think about that Liam, because if this is just a way to make me feel better or a way to, I don't know, 'pick up my broken pieces', then it needs to stop! It needs to stop because I don't want to be that person. I... I don't want to be some charity case to you." I said, not being able to blink away the tears. A few slid down my cheeks and Liam tried to wipe them away, but I pulled back and wiped them off myself.

"You're not a charity case, Zayn. I know I never returned your feelings, but I see that I was just too stubborn to actually admit I was falling for you. Okay? After that first night we spent together, you just left me there. You said to pretend it never happend, and I guess I shut off my emotions for you then. We were younger then, and I guess I felt like you just took advantage of me then." He said, and that made me burst into tears.

"Why didn't you say something then, Liam!? Shit! I never meant to make you feel that way. Nobody should ever feel taken advantage of! I wouldn't want you to. You could have told me you didn't want to. You could have said to stop. Liam, I've been through that before, and... FUCK! I fucking hate myself for making you feel that way!"

This was all too much now. Never in a million years would I wish that upon someone else. I know what it's like to feel taken advantage of, and the fact that I made Liam feel that way just killed me.

"No, Zayn. I said that wrong. Shit! I'm sorry. That came out wrong. I just felt like you didn't care. Like it was a one time thing and it would never happen again, so I didn't get my hopes up. It's not like I didn't want it. I even said I did. You asked me, and I said yes. There had to have been some reason why I would let you take my virginity, and now I know what that reason is. I liked you, Zayn. I liked you a lot, but I never admitted it to myself. And I guess I fell harder than ever, but I denied it. I chose to believe you didn't want me, making myself believe I didn't want you either. When you told me you liked me, I was shocked. I didn't know what to do or how to react. And then we slept together, and I just felt like it was all just another game. I'm so sorry I made you feel this way, but I do love you, Zayn." He said.

I didn't know if I believed him. I didn't know if I even wanted to believe him. I was told that I couldn't be loved, so why would that ever change? It wasn't possible to change that. It had to just be his sympathy for me.

"Please, Zayn. I can see the hesitation in your eyes, but I do love you. You're just scared. Just like that first time we slept together, you're scared. You pushed me away then, so please don't hurt yourself that way again. I just want to make you happy, not because I feel sorry for you, but because I love you." He said.

I was so unsure, and I was questioning everything. But Harry said that I should trust Liam, and Harry wasn't really a bad judge in character from what I can tell. He's the only one who actually tried to settle Louis down, and he succeeded. Maybe I should just try and let my guard down.

"I want to believe you, I just-" I was interrupted by Liam. He came closer to me, holding both of my hands in his own. He looked me in the eyes, a begging look on his face. But there was also something else. Something more than fondness and adoration. I didn't want to call it love. It was so scary to call it love.

"I'll make you believe it. I'll prove to you just how much you mean to me, Zayn. No matter how many times you try to push me away, I'll always come back. Even if you don't say that you love me back, I would still love you. Even if it takes forever, I'll make you believe it. You're worth it." He said, and yeah, those were tears falling again.

This time he did wipe them away. "I love you, Zayn." He said as he pulled me in for a kiss. I immediately kissed him back because even if my thoughts told me to hold back, my body reacted differently. It was like it constantly craved to be around Liam; to be touched by Liam.

He cupped my face as he pulled me into the kiss, tongue basically begging for entrance. I parted my lips, loving the way he sighed as he slipped his tongue in against mine. He slowly massaged my tongue with his, and I felt myself wanting to break down.

The kiss wasn't rushed and desperate. It was slow. Slow and caring and it made my heart feel heavy in a good way. It was like it was just filling up with so much...love? Maybe Liam could love me. Maybe I am loveable. I'm not sure what to believe anymore. I did love Liam though. That was one thing I knew.

Liam hummed against my lips before pulling away and said "I think I know the first step to showing you how much you mean to me." He said. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow, and I yelped in surprise as he lifted me up by my waist and carried me over to the restroom.

"What are you doing?" I asked him as he set me down infront of the mirror. He stood behind me, making eye contact with me through the mirror.

"I'm going to show you how beautiful you are to me. First thing's first, your eyes." He began, and I already felt myself feeling shaky. This was too much already, and he just barely started. "I love your eyes. They're such a stunning shade of brown. Mixed with amber. They shine so much and they hold the deepest emotions a person could ever hold. I know there's fear and pain in them, but I want to be able to fix that." He kissed me right on my temple before talking again.

"Your nose. It may seem weird to other people but your nose is fucking perfect." He said, snuggling his head in my neck a bit, and I laughed at his words and the ticklish feeling he gave me. He smiled at me, and Harry's words of his fond smile played through my head.

"Your lips are amazing. They are so soft and pink, and I can't even deny that they are probably my greatest addiction. I could honestly just kiss you all day if you would ever let me." To prove his point he pulled me into a deep kiss. It seemed to last forever, and I had to pull away first, Liam letting out a little whine as I did. I could only smile at his cuteness.

"Your hair always seemed to fall perfectly. You honestly don't even need product. I would love to just play with your hair until you fell asleep." He said, running his fingers through it a few times. I leaned back against his chest, and he held me tighter.

"I really love you, Zayn. I love every little thing about you from your head to your toes. Inside and out you are beautiful. Everything about you drives me crazy and makes me want more. It's never going to be enough, but I don't even want it to be. I want to chase you, no matter how long it takes. You're worth it. Okay? You're perfect, Zayn." He said.

I let out a surprised moan as he kissed my neck and then latched onto a spot near my shoulder. He sucked gently on the skin, holding me close to his body. His lips felt amazing on my body, and my hand went back to fist into his hair as he continued to suck his mark onto my skin.

I looked into the mirror, feeling the room get hotter as I did. Actually watching Liam do this to me made it ten times sexier than it ever has. I could feel myself getting turned on, and my knees were goign weak. I let out a light moan as I also felt Liam getting hard against my backside.

He finally pulled off, kissing over it once and whispering "You are mine." I nodded. He met my eyes in the mirror again, and I just knew then. He did love me. He wouldn't fo through this if he didn't because what would honestly be the point in it?

"I love you, Zayn." He whispered again.

"I believe you." I replied. He instantly looked relieved as his face broke out into the cutest smile I've ever seen. He turned me around in his arms and then pressed his lips to mine. "I. Love. You. So. Much." He said between kisses.

I moaned again as his hands traveled up my shirt. "I love you, too, Li. Fuck." I groaned, feeling his hard-on press against mine as I shifted a bit.

"Bed. Now." I said. He chuckled against my neck and nodded, lifting me up and carrying me back to the bed. Yeah, I loved this boy.


	27. Risky Ordeal

LOUIS

"Liam! Zayn!" I called them into the room. It was the same room where we called Harry's parents. The same room I made Zayn tie his hands in. The same room I hit him in. I hated that memory, but I loved Harry, and it meant the world that he forgave me for that terrible mistake. I would never hurt him that way again.

They both walked into the room, looking at me with curiosity written all over their faces. I was a bit afraid of how they would react when I told them what I wanted to do, but I was going to do it with or without them. 

"I overheard a conversation between Niall and Harry this morning, and I've been thinking that maybe we should give a bit of comfort to their families." I said. Liam raised his eyebrow and Zayn only looked at Liam to see how he would react.

"What do you mean by comfort them? Louis, this whole situation is already very unusual for a kidnapping." He said, bringing me back to that reality that this was a kidnapping. We did take Harry without him wanting to leave, and even if he wanted to be here now, it was stil very illegal.

"I know that, Liam. I just... I heard how worried Niall was about his parents struggling with money, so what if we give their house a little visit at midnight and leave some money in their mailbox. I mean, we still have tons in our bank." I said. Most of the money was from past kidnappings that got the job done. This one was really the only one that was more complicated than that, but I would accept it that way if it meant Harry got to stay.

"I mean, I guess we could. But there are so many things that could fo wrong, Louis. We could get caught putting the money in the mailbox, and they'd wanna know why. Something could happen here while we're gone. As much as I am sure Harry won't leave, not too sure about Niall." He said.

"Niall won't leave." Zayn added in. I knew that, too. It was obvious Niall wouldn't leave. Not without Harry at least. He was his best friend, and also the boy he loved, which did get on my nerves quite a lot, but I trusted Harry. I knew how he felt about me.

"Okay. Then what's your full plan? What are we going to tell Harry?" Liam asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked. Last time we left Harry here he never asked much. He wasn't one to pry really, and that sort of made this easier to do as a surprise.

"Well, won't he get a bit curious if you just up and leave in the middle of the night?" Liam asked. He did have a point there, but I don't think Harry would actually try and figure out what I was leaving to do.

"I'll just tell him that we have to take care of some business. Just leave that part to me." I said. Liam was about to speak again, most likely in protest, but Zayn touched his arm and he immediately stopped.

I raised my eyebrow at them, seeing Liam look at Zayn in the eyes. There was a certain fondness that they held in them, and it made sense to me now. The way he looked at Zayn was full of such love. I knew because it was how I looked at Harry. That fondness. I didn't know how to react to that, but the more human part that Harry brought to life was happy for my best friends.

Best friends. I have never thought of Liam and Zayn as my best friends. They were always more my henchmen, my partners, my back-up, my acquantances. Never my best friends. But now, I actually see and appreciate them being here after all the hell I'vs put them through. Maybe it was time to try and let them in as well.

I looked at them with pleading eyes and said "Please just help me with this." Liam looked a bit surprised and Zayn looked thoughtful, but they both nodded, agreeing to help me out. I gave a sigh of relief and breathed out a "Thank you" before I said "We'll leave at midnight. Meet in the living room."  
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I never went to sleep, just stayed up holding Harry in my arms as he slept against my chest. His warmth radiated to me, and I felt such love for this beautiful boy in my arms. I would give anything to hold him- always.

The clock read 11:00. One hour until I had to be in the living room, and I was dreading it. Yes, I did want to go through with the plan to help out Niall's family, but I didn't want to leave Harry's side. I just wanted to keep him close all the time.

My thoughts drifted off to the letter I had tucked into my coat pocket earlier today. Nobody knew about the letter, but I was planning on sending it to Harry's parents. Maybe if we're consoling Niall's parents about this a bit, Harry's could be consoled as well.

I had no clue what I was even doing really, but I wanted Harry to feel like it was okay to be here. I wanted his parents to see that he's not in any danger. I want them to know they don't have to continuously sweat about it.

I turned onto my back, keeping my other arm underneath Harry, my hand rubbing his arm up and down. I found it a bit strange how badly I needed Harry here. He brought out the best in me, and, eventhough it was weird, I sort of thanked his parents for that in a way.

Tonight we will be taking a big risk, and it was scary. It was scary to think that if we mess up and get caught this is all over. Harry will be taken away again, and I'll be nothing at all. Still, I needed to at least make some things right.

It's not like I could allow Harry to just go back home either. His parents would get suspicious and keep close tabs on him. Then, they would be curious on these three new people that are randomly coming into his life. It would seem to fishy. We would get figured out so easily, especially because we can't 100% trust Niall to be on our side and not dish anything out.

I looked over at the clock again, seeing that fifteen minutes went by. I sighed and turned back to face Harry. I moved my arm a little bit, and he stirred in his sleep, his eyes opening a bit. "Hmm? Are you okay, Lou?" He asked in such a deep, raspy voice. He looked so adorable when he was sleepy, and I kissed his forehead before responding.

"Yes. I'm fine. Listen, Liam, Zayn, and I jave some business to attend to tonight. We're leaving in a bit." I confessed. He looked a bit confused and upset as he fully opened his eyes and seemed more awake.

"What? Why? What has to be done so late at night?" He asked. It's not like I could tell him just what we were planning to do. He would most likely protest against the idea and then it wouldn't happen at all.

"Don't worry, Haz. It's nothing dangerous. I promise. We just need to fix a few things real quick." I said, trying to give few details. It sucked not being able to tell him the truth, but it would suck even more if he knew and became completely upset with me for risking this.

He laid in silence for a while before he asked "When will you be back?" He looked a bit upset when he asked that, and it made me feel a bit guilty for not being able to give him all of the information.

"I don't know. Maybe in three hours." I said, trying to determine how long it would take to get to Niall's street and then back here while making a stop at Harry's house. Sadly, his frown grew more, and I just wanted to see him smile.

"Hey." I said, cupping his face in my hands and pulling him close enough so our foreheads were touching. "Hey, love. I don't particularly fancy leaving your side either, but this has to be done tonight. Trust me, I don't even want to get out of bed when I know you're here right now, but I have to. God, Harry, I love you so much." I said, finally kissing his lips.

He kissed back with almost a certain desperation to get me to stay. He seemed desperate and terrified, almost as if he knew what I was planning to do. He couldn't possibly know though because I doubt he would let me taktle the risk. Still, it made this all feel more dangerous and real.

If I made one stupid mistake while being out there tonight, I could get caught and lose Harry. It could mean the end of us. The one person who made me feel anything other than anger and self-pity. The one person who actually makes me feel alive. Call me crazy, but I needed Harry in my life. He was my everything. He was my life. He was my world. My home.

I broke apart from the kiss as soon as I felt a tear slip down his cheek. It was only then that I noticed he was shaking and he looked so scared. That made me worry over him even more and question if I should even leave his side.

"Harry, please angel. Don't cry, love. What's wrong?" I asked, wiping his tears away. Why was he so upset over me leaving? I mean, I was upset about leaving, but this was so intense.

"Nothing. It's s-stupid." He said, turning over to face away from me. "Yo-you should g-go." He said, trying to hold himself together. It made my heart ache to just see him this way. I needed him to be happy.

"It's not stupid if it's making you so upset. Remember how you promised to talk to me when you were down? This is one of those moments. Talk to me, Harry." I said, pressing my front to his back and just rubbing his arm to try and soothe him.

"It's so stupid!" He cried. "I just- I feel like when you leave, you might not come back. I don't know. It feels unsafe without you here. Which is a bit ironic, but still. It brings back all those memories of sitting in my room alone and just feeling as if nobody wants to be around me. Just that feeling of being so unloved." He said, voice growing quieter near the end of his sentence, and I hated that he felt that way.

I turned him back to me a bit and instantly kissed his lips. "Haz, I'm always going to come back to you. Hell, I can't even be without you for a second without forgetting that I can be so much more than just embodied anger. I'll always come back to you, Harry, because a heart always has to come back home." I said, and that made his eyes water up.

"God, I love you." He breathed out before his arm grabbed the back of my neck to pull me into a kiss. I gently kissed him back, just trying to muster all of my love for him in this lip-lock. He whimpered a bit when I ran my tongue across his bottom lip.

His mouth fell open, and my tongue immediately delved into his mouth. He tasted sweet, even with the slight start of morning breath. I'm so in love with him that the taste of morning breath was hardly even noticeable. I'd kiss him anyways.

Finally, we pulled apart and I saw that I had ten minutes to be in the living room. Time always seemed to speed up with Harry when all I wanted to do was slow it down, drag it out, make it last longer.

I sighed and said "I have to go now, love. I will come back, Harry. I can promise you that. You hold my heart, and I have to come back to it." I pecked his lips once more and climbed out of bed, quickly dressing up and putting on my tan coat. "I love you." I said, kissing his forehead. "Get some sleep, okay? I'll be back before you even know it."

He nodded and pulled the blanket up to his chin before laying down and closing his eyes. I left the room, looking back once at the beautiful boy that I got to love. I mean it when I say he holds my heart. I can almost see it in his hands.  
\------------------------------------------------------

"So we drive right by the curb, Zayn goes and puts the money in the postbox, and we drive off, right?" Liam asked from the backseat. I nodded, though I still haven't added the fact that we would be taking a detour to Harry's house. Liam would absolutely flip if he knew.

I turned down another street, reading the street sign and knowing we only had a few minutes before we reached Niall's house. I was feeling rather nervous about this, but not because of our first destination, rather our second. There were bound to be police look outs around the home at the very least.

I finally turned down Niall's street, looking at the house numbers as I drive by and coming to a stop outside of the right house. Zayn immediately got out of the car before it even came to full stop. He was already wearing gloves, so he didn't need to worry about fingerprints being left.

He quicklt grabbed the envelope full of mony and went to the mailbox, trying to be quick but silent. Liam seemed pretty apprehensive as soon as he got out of the car door, but I knew Zayn would be fine. He was a pro at this.

I watched as he silently opened the mailbox without even a single creak. He slipped the envelope in and then came back to us, a smug smile on his face as he hopped into the car. "Easy." He said, and I laughed as Liam just seemed to admire Zayn.

I then drove off from the street and made a turn onto another, the way to Harry's basically imprinted into my head due to how often I have studied the map of his neighborhood.

I took another turn, looking at Zayn and Liam to see if they noticed I wasn't going in the direction of our house, but they seemed too involved with one another to notice. So, I continued driving on.

It was only when I turned right on Harry's street that they seemed to notice. "Um, Louis, what are we doing here?" Liam asked as soon as he took in our surroundings, giant houses that looked very similar to mansions. These people were loaded. Harry was loaded. It always amazed me because I never really grew up with much money. I was always taught that those people were snooty and selfish, but Harry was so far from that.

"Lou, turn the car around right now. I don't know what you plan on doing but-" I cut Liam off by parking the car behind a row of trees before opening my door and stepping out. "Just stay in the car. I'll be careful. Give me ten minutes. If I'm not back by then, go back home. Okay?" I asked them both, looking between them.

"Louis, what are you-" Liam began go ask.

"Okay." Zayn said, looking at me in the eyes. Zayn was good at reading people. I hardly showed emotion, but the amount of desperation and need to do this was so immense, I doubt I did well at hiding it.

I breathed out a thank you before making my way around the mass of trees. I stopped right when I saw police officer in front of Harry's house. Two actually. They were talking right next to where the mailbox was. I needed them out of the way.

I looked around me to see what I could do to make them move away. I picked up a decent sized stone and then walked to the back of the house a bit. I needed to aim at something that could make a loud enough noise to distract them.

My eyes locked on little glass statue in the middle of the garden that was growing. As much as it would probably suck to have that smashed, it had to be done. I pulled my arm back before throwing the stone and hearing the shatter of the statue.

I heard voices followed by yelling, knowing the police were coming to check on it. I quickly ran my way back into th shadows and ran to the mailbox. I had to do this fast and quietly.

My heart was beating quickly as I slowly opened the mailbox so it wouldn't make a sound. I froze when I saw the mound of envelopes inside. I pulled them out and looked at them, all of them being bills that needed to be paid. Was this whole thing causing Harry's parents to just want to give up?

My heart hurt just thinking that keeping him with me for my own selfish purpose was making his family live such an unhealthy life. I mean, what if they got evicted or something? It would all be my fault. What would Harry think of me then? I couldn't take it if he hated me because of it.

I heard the footsteps returning and I shoved the letter in the mailbox with the rest. "Shit!" I whispered as I had to close the mailbox quietly as well. My heart was beating quickly as I finally got it shut and turned to run.

"HEY YOU! STOP!" I heard an officer yell, and I ran. I ran as fast as my legs could go. I ran through the trees instead of around them, using the shadows as my disguise. I moved more slowly because there were twigs that could snap and give my position away.

My heart was beating heavily as I listened for their footsteps, but they seemed to have disappeared. I finally made my way out of the other side and ran to the car, not wasting a second to step on the gas as soon as I got in.

"What the hell happened, Louis? We heard yelling." Liam asked as I tried to catch my breath. I got away. It's okay. They couldn't have seen anything on me. It was too dark. We were gonna be fine. We had to be fine.

"It's fine." I said. They shared a look with each other before we all drove in silence, a bit of dread falling on me at the thought that I probably just fucked everything up.


	28. Trust and Lies

HARRY

I woke up in warm arms and I smiled a bit, just knowing that Louis meant it when he said he'd be back before I knew it if I fell asleep. I rolled over in his arms, just admiring his beauty before snuggling myself into his chest, ny head pressing against his neck.

"You're very smiley this morning." He commented in a sleepy voice, and I pulled back to look at him. He opened his eyes as a smile played on his lips. Louis was utter beauty. Just the way the long piece of fringe he had fell infront of his eyes. His amazing blue eyes were so bright and almost crystallic. It was amazing.

I lifted my hands to his cheeks, feeling the slight stubble that was growing, but I actually liked it on him. "Well, I'm happy you're back." I confessed, not even feeling ashamed or embarrassed by it after he reassured me of things last night.

"Mmm. I am, too. Hate being away from you." He said before pressing a kiss to my jaw, right over a sweet spot, and I gasped as pleasure filled my body in a surge of electricity. He knew all of my sweet spots, and it seemed to be his plan to use them as he then made his way to the spot right behind my ear, making me whimper.

He pulled back with a smile and that's when I decided to ask about the night he had with Liam and Zayn. "Um, what did you do last night?" I asked hesitantly. He told me that he had some business to attend to, but I really wanted to know more than that.

"The usual stuff. Liam, Zayn, and I worked out a few planned things. Nothing that you need to worry about." He said, but he said it in a bit of an unsure way. His didn't even look me in the eyes and that made me feel like something was a bit wrong.

"Is everything okay? Did something happen that I should know about, Louis?" I asked, getting up to rest on my elbows a bit. He shook his head before climbing out of bed. He gave a small sigh as he stood up. It just made me even more worried.

"Louis, can you please talk to me? Something happened, didn't it? What happened? Is it bad?" I asked, question after question just seeming spiral out of my mouth. I had no control over what I was saying, the panicky feeling taking over me.

"NOTHING HAPPENED, HARRY! NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP!" He yelled in anger. I instantly shut my mouth, trying to will the tears that were building up in my eyes away. It's been so long since Louis's yelled at me that way. He was doing so good with controlling his anger. A part of me felt foolish for thinking he put all the anger behind him.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, my voice cracking as I turned over so my back was to Louis. I heard him sigh again, whispering a small "Shit!" I listened to his footsteps come closer, and I couldn't contain my tears anymore as he whispered "Baby, I'm sorry."

I didn't know if I should forgive him, but I just love him so much. Even if he acted like an asshole or a complete jerk, I would always absolutely be one hundred percent in love with Louis. I couldn't deny that feeling when it was so evident to me.

He placed his hand on my shoulder and I tensed up a bit. My head was telling me not to give in because he had absolutely no legit reason to yell at me, but my heart was feeling so weak, especially when he was touching me.

"I'm so sorry, Haz." He whispered, pressing a kiss to my shoulder. I tried to ignore his touch, his words, his presence, but he was so close and he was apologizing so sincerely. But he was always so sincere, wasn't he?

He turned my face to look at him and I saw the regret and his own hurt flash in his eyes. Those eyes. I remember when I could never read them, but now that he's let me in, it was becoming easier day by day. They held so much more than stone now.

"Shit. I'm so sorry, Harry. I'm so sorry. Please don't cry, love. You're too beautiful for these tears to stain your cheeks." He said gently, holding me close, but all that did was make me cry even more. It made me feel so torn between forgiving him or pushing his anger issue further.

"I just wanted to know if everything was alright, Louis. You just seemed... I don't know. You seemed worried and almost panicky. I've never really seen you that way. I don't think any of us have, so you can imagine the effect that has on me." I said. Louis was the strong one, and if he was worried, I should be far worse.

"I know. I know, babe. Everything's fine, though. We had a little complication last night, but I promise you that everything's alright. God, just please don't hate me. I'm just so scared of losing you, Harry." He said, his arms wrapping around my waist and holding me tighter. I heard the small whimper in his voice and it broke my heart.

"You won't lose me, Louis. Your heart fits with mine, remember? We need each other." I said. He seemed to want to cry now. He nodded before saying "God, I love you." He leaned forward and crashed our lips together.

I held onto him tightly as I kissed him back, letting all of my love for him pour into that kiss. He pulled back and said "Wanna make you feel good, Haz" before he began to press kisses on my jawline.

"L-Lou...please." I moaned out lightly, but he heard me anyways. He replied between pressing kisses down my neck. "What do you want, love?" He questioned, and I just wanted to smack him for asking when he already knew.

"You. Please. I want to feel you in me." I said, feeling a sudden heat rush over me. Louis ran his tongue ovet the marks he already made, making me shiver and gasp at the feeling. I am always so desperate for Louis, and it makes me feel a bit embarrassed at times, but I loved it.

"Fuck, Harry." He breathed out. His fingers immediately made their way to my boxers before he tugged them down. His fingers instantly made their way back up to my cock and he wrapped his fingers around it. I moaned at the delicate skin contact as he began pumping me.

"Does that feel good, babe?" He asked, and I could only nod as I felt pleasure consume me. It was funny how I could go from upset at Louis to so turned on by him in the blink of an eye. It was something that I'm pretty sure only he could do to me.

Pretty soon, Louis's hand wasn't enough. I needed more of Louis. Always needed more of Louis. What I got was never enough and it never would be. He was intoxicating. He was my high. He made me feel things that I only ever imagined I could feel.

I gave a low moan as Louis bit at the inside of my thigh, sucking on the skin to leave his mark. It felt amazing as he repeated the process, getting closer to my hardened member. "Taste so good, babe." He groaned before he pressed a kiss over the newest mark.

The fact that he could always speak in such a dirty manner made my head spin. I found it so hot how his mouth was so foul but his touch was so gentle. The contrast drove me insane. He was perfect, and I loved everything about him.

"Louis, ple-" My begging got cut off as I felt something wet touch my hole. I gave out a whimper at the feeling. I looked down, seeing Louis's head between my thighs, his hands grabbing onto them so tightly that I would probably have his nails marked onto my skin. It made me breathless.

He licked another long strip over my hole, and I gave out another broken sounding cry. "Like that, babe?" He asked, and I frantically nodded as my fingers twisted in Louis's hair. It felt so good. I have never felt anything like it before.

"I love you so much, Harry. Shit. You taste so sweet." He said, and I could feel his breath over my hole, making me desperate for more. His tongue went back over my hole, giving tentalizing licks before I felt the tip of it push into my, making all of my air leave my body.

I was already becoming painfully hard, Louis's tongue teasing around my rim. "Louis, please. Please, please, please." I basically cried. He listened to me and gave me what I was begging for.

I felt my whole body shake as Louis's entered me, much deeper than the first time. I hissed a bit as his nails dug into my thighs, but it felt amazing. I guess not all pain was nad pain because this felt so pleasureable to me, and it honestly just made me way Louis everywhere.

"Louis, can you please fuck me?" I whined, pushing down onto his tongue. He pulled away and I whimpered at the loss of contact, feeling a bit of his saliva still on my hole. The wetness gave a cool feeling on it and made me desperate for his warmth.

"It's not fucking Harry. It's so much more than that." He said, and I knew what he meant. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his, feeling a bit dizzy at the taste of his tongue on mine. He tasted sweet and it made my heart pound just knowing where his tongue has been.

I pulled back and looked into his beautiful blue eyes. "Please make love to me, Louis." I whispered, and he nodded before capturing my lips in his again. I felt him manevour himself so that he could pull his boxers down without breaking the kiss.

I decided to help him out, pulling his boxers down for him and them immediately wrapping my hand around his member. He took a sharp intake of breath and whispered in my mouth. "Fuck. Harry, please. Need to be in you already." He hissed in arousal.

I pumped him a few times, making him wither and plea to be in me. That's when an idea popped into my head. I trailed my kisses up his jawline and kissed right below his ear before whispering "What if I want to ride you?" 

"Harry... Fucking hell, babe." He breathed out and I felt his body shaking for some type of pleasure as my hand stopped pumping him. "Ple-ease" cam his broken plead. I smiled against his cheek before flipping us both over so Louis was below me and I was on top.

I held him in my hand, positioning the tip at my entrance. His hands held my hips, but I didn't sink down on him yet, just teased him. "Please, Harry. Want you so bad." He begged in a low voice. His eyes were blown with arousal, and as much as I wanted this, too, I had to know some truth.

"Do you swear nothing bad or risky happened last night?" I asked, holding myself above him. His eyes shifted emotions for a second before he nodded. "Yes. Yes I swear. Everything's fine." He said. I had to trust him. That was the most important thing. Trust.

"I believe you." I moaned out as I slowly sank down onto his member, feeling every single inch move into me. I listened to Louis's breathing as I finally sank all the way down onto him and leaned against his chest as I adjusted to his size. I listened to his heartbeat, feeling the coolness of my necklace on my neck. Since Louis gave it to me, I've never taken it off.

"Are you okay, Haz?" He asked, and I nodded before picking myself up a bit and sinking back down onto him. It felt amazing, and I loved the fact that I had control of pace and roughness. I also loved how Louis's fingers dug into my hips, most likely leaving marks.

Pretty soon I craved more, so I was fully slamming myself down onto Louis's cock now, listening to his moans along with my own. Of course my moand were full of whimperd and little curses. I angled the next thrust a bit and yelled in exstacy as Louis hit my prostate dead on, making me lean forward and muffle my cries into his shoulder. It all felt so good. Too good. My legs were getting tired from doing the work, but I didn't want to stop, the raw feeling much too amazing. Even if it hurt.

I felt a tear slip out of my eye at the pleasure, and Louis kissed my hair. "You're okay, baby. Can you go on, or do you want me to take over?" He asked, but I shook my head. I wanted to do this.

I picked myself up again, ignoring the sore feeling that seemed to be taking over, and slammed myself down again, right on my prostate. "Fuck, Louis. Feels so good." I whined. I repeated the action several times, feeling all of the pleasure collect in my abdomen.

I was on the edge, slamming myself down so he hit my prostate and then circuling my hips on it a bit to feel even more pressure there. "I'm gonna- God, Lou." I moaned out as I circled my hips again.

"Let go, babe. Fuck, feel so good around me." He said, giving a squeeze onto my ass cheeks. That was it. I came with a yell, squirting between us both. Louis followed suit, filling me up with his warmth. I didn't have the energy to pull off of him, so I just leaned onto his shoulder and we both caught our breath.

"You were amazing. I love you, Harry." Louis said after a while, and, yeah. I loved him, too.  
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"Harry! You need to see this!" I heard Niall yell from the living room. We were left alone for a bit because Louis and the others went to check and see how whatever they did last night went. It made me a bit more curious, but I let him go without questioning.

"What is it, Niall. I was just about to get in the sho-" My words trailed off as I looked at the TV and saw my house on there. Two police officers were talking to a news reporter about a new clue, and I rushed over beside Niall to listen.

"We didn't see much, considering the fact that it was dark and by the time we got our flashlights out, he had left, but we saw brown hair and a long, tan coat." One officer said, and my heart stopped. It couldn't possibly be him. Could it?

I leaned closer as the lady asked "And what did the suspect leave in the mailbox?" I held my breath and listened to the other officer speak.

"We found only a letter. It was almost an apologetic letter. Mr. And Mrs. Styles would rather not have the exact wording public, but we think it was from the kidnapper of their son. It was also reported that the Horans, friends of the Styles family whose son went missing awhile ago have recieved money." He said.

I was so confused. What was even going on? Is this what Louis had been doing that night? Did he completely lie to me about nothing happening? He was seen! That is not just nothing! How could he say it was all fine?

My breathing got harder as I realized what this could mean if the polica catch onto him. I was shaking and so close to tears. Niall quickly turned the TV off so I didn't have to hear anymore and held me tight.

"Harry, breathe please. It's okay. It's gonna be okay. It'll be alright." He said, trying to calm me down, but I was in a panic. I didn't want to be taken from Louis. How the hell could he lie to me about something so huge!?

"No it's not! Niall, I could be taken away from Louis! He means so much to me. I have no idea what I'd do if they found out who he is. I would be torn. Broken. It would not be okay because without Louis, I have no idea what to do!" I freaked out.

"Harry, they probably won't find out who he is. They said it themselves, it was too dark-" He tried to coax me down, but I was too riled up. I was scared, betrayed, lied to, angry. It was all too much right now.

"You never know, Niall! Why would he lie to me? He said everything was fine! Why would he say that?" I asked. This was far too much to fully comprehend right now.

"He didn't want you to freak out or worry, Harry. Honestly, maybe Louis did the right thing in this situation. I can tell he cares for you, as much as it hurts, I know he does." Niall said, but I shook my head.

"He lied. He lied to me. What else did he lie about? He lied." I said. I didn't like being lied to at all. It broke the trust I had for that person. Trust was everything. Especially in a relationship.

I was still shaking as the front door opened and Louis, Liam, and Zayn stepped inside. "Harry, what's wrong? What's going on, babe?" Louis asked with wide eyes, trying to come up to me and hold me, but I pushed him away.

"Don't 'babe' me! You fucking lied! You lied!" I looked at what he was wearing. A long tan coat over his clothing. I scoffed and then pulled away saying "Don't touch me." Then, I turned and walked down the hall, into my old bedroom instead of Louis's.

It hurt that he lied. He lied to me. He broke that trust we had. After everything. He broke it. He lied.


	29. Crumbling

LOUIS

He walked away. How the hell did he find out? I turned to Niall and glared at him. "What the hell did you do!? What did you tell him?" I yelled at him as I walked closer to him. He backed away a bit with wide eyes and said "I didn't do anything! It was you who decided to not tell him where you were last night." He said.

"He didn't have to know." I replied. "Now, how did he find out?" Niall just looked at me in silence before he just shook his head and looked to the side with his arms crossed. I wasn't in the mood to deal with this. I was beyind pissed right now, and I could tell Niall was enjoying it.

"HOW THE HELL DID HE FIND OUT!?" I yelled, slamming my fist against the wall right by his face. He flinched and turned to me with wide eyes. He was obviously terrified of me, and I loved that fact. He needed to know that he should answer me when I ask a question.

"Louis, maybe you should just calm down a little and-"

"Shut the fuck up, Zayn!" I said, not even taking my eyes off of Niall. His blue eyes were staring right into mine with terror. "Now, I'll ask again, and you'll answer me. How. Did. Harry. Find. Out?" I asked between clenched teeth, trying to control my anger and not lash out on everyone here.

"He saw the news. They said they saw a man with brown hair and a tan coat." He said, looking down at what I was wearing. I cursed under my breath and pushed myself away from Niall so that I wouldn't hit him if I did lash out.

"You know, you brought this on yourself. I mean, you lied to Harry when he asked you where you were going. You lied to him when he asked you if everything was okay. You probably even lied to him about loving him." He said, hatred being clear in his voice. I already knew he despised me. It wasn't hard to tell. But that one little comment set me off.

"I DO FUCKING LOVE HARRY!" I said, quickly walking towards him, but Zayn caught me by my arm and pulled me back, Liam standing between us. I wanted to punch his fucking face in! 

He glared at me as I glared at him, but I saw the true fear in his eyes. "You should stop being a cry baby over the fact that Harry just doesn't love you like you love him! Just be happy that he actually does love someone!" I said, knowing I hit home with Niall by the way that he growled at me, making Liam hold him back by his chest.

"He doesn't love you! You deluded him into thinking he does! That's why your so scared of losing him! Because you know very well that if he happened to leave, he probably wouldn't come back." He said, a smirk on his lips. I hated him. I fucking hated every little thing about him. He wasn't good enough for Harry, and he needed to know that.

"You know what, you're not even good enough for Harry. You're not good enough to be his friend, let alone anything above that. You're never happy or supportive to him, yet you think you're some fucking saint! You shouldn't even be around him!" I declared, but he bit right back at me.

"You're not good enough for him! You took him from his home, held his hostage for money, you even hurt him because we all heard that on the phone! And you have the nerve to tell me that I'm not good enough for him!?" He asked with such an angry face, but that wouldn't scare me. I still knew I could beat his ass up if I needed to.

"See?" I said with a small chuckle, and he looked a bit confused as to why I was laughing. "If you knew Harry like I did, you would know that he hated being at home alone. He hated the fact that people praised the ground he walked on because he was rich and good-looking. He hated himself. Before me." I said, trying my best not to cry at the thought of Harry breaking down and trying to hurt himself. He was too beautiful and kind for that. He was my whole world.

"Did you know that he tried to kill himself?" I asked, and Niall's anger disappeared right away. "He hated himself, his life, how he looked, everything. And that thought fucking kills me because he's the most amazing, the most beautiful human being I have ever seen. So don't you dare tell me that I'm not good enough for him when I seem to be the only person that made him truly feel like he's worth something." I said. I pushed Zayn off of me, watching him stumble back a bit before I looked at Niall.

I could tell my eyes were watery and filling up with tears, but I refused to let them fall. "I only did what I did last night to help your family through their struggle. You're very fucking welcome." I snarled before I walked down the hallway. I had to fix things with Harry. I needed him to still be by my side. I needed him and his love, as much as I hate to admit that.

I went up to the door that led to his old bedroom and turned the door knob, deciding that knocking would make him tell me to just go away and leave him alone, not that he might not anyway.

I walked into the little room, and my heart tore to pieces as I saw Harry sitting against the wall and crying into his knees that were tucked under his arms. It hurt to see him this way. Why wasn't I just honest with him? But I knew why, of course.

"Harry-" I was cut off right away as his head snapped up to me and I saw so much in his beautiful green eyes. Hurt, betrayal, anger. It wasn't a nice mix, but underneath all of that, I still saw that familiar trace of love. That was so important to me. To know that I fucked up royally, but he still loved me deep inside.

"Go away." He said, and it sounded hard and almost like a demand. He wasn't being shy and his voice wasn't shaky. He was full of authority right now.

"Can you just give me a chance to explain?" I asked, getting a bit ticked off myself. Harry was all about listening and forgiveness, but not this time. He seemed just completely done. Upset and over it.

"No. Because if I do, how do I know that the things you say aren't complete lies?" He said, and I scoffed and rolled my eyes, which made him glare at me as he stood up.

"Don't roll your fucking eyes, Louis. Do you even care about how betrayed I feel? Do you even care about the fact that you could have been caught? You could have been caught, Louis! Then what would you have done? What would I have done? How could you be so fucking stupid!? They saw you!" He yelled out.

"No, they saw my coat. They saw brown hair and a tan coat. That could be literally anybody. They didn't see my face, they didn't see Zayn or Liam, and they certainly didn't see us leave." I stated, trying to remain calm around Harry.

"How do you know that? How do you know they didn't see you and lied about it? How do you know they didn't see a license plate on the car as it drove away? How do you know you didn't leave a single speck of evidence there?" He asked me, and I stayed quiet, trying to breathe so I wouldn't snap at him. He was making this so much more difficult than it even needed to be.

"Answer me!" He yelled, almost begging me to reply. He scoffed and said "You can't, can you? What? Too scared to admit the fact that you probably just fucked everything up for some stupid letter?" He said, and that was the last straw.

"That 'stupid letter' was to out your parent's mind at rest, so they would know their son wasn't in any danger! Sorry for caring about the people you love! Sorry for thinking that I could possibly try and settle things down a little! Sorry for trying to help out, not only your family, but your best friend's as well! Sorry for not telling you where I was going, but that's because you wouldn't have let me! Sorry for lying to you, but you would have lost your mind, just like you are doing now! They didn't see me, Harry!" I yelled.

"BUT YOU STILL LIED TO ME!" He shrieked, and I felt a pang of pain in my chest as I saw tears spill from his eyes. His face was red with anger, and he looked so upset. "You lied to me, Louis. All my life, all people have ever done was lie to me. I thought you were different. How do I know your truths from your lies? How can I trust everything you've ever said to me now? How? Because I don't see how I can."

"Harry..." I whispered out, but he went on, not giving me a chance to speak.

"No, Louis! Just stop! Stop! Please." He said, his voice cracking a bit. "You know, I was so stupid for falling so in love with you because it hurts like hell right now to know that you probably never even felt the same. When we made love, was it even making love to you? When you said you loved me too, was it just a sentence that didn't mean a thing? I need to know, Louis. I just need to fucking know." He cried.

"You know how much I love you, Harry." I said, tears threatening to fall from my eyes. "You know how much you mean to me."

"I thought I did. But I don't know anymore. You're just a liar, Louis. Maybe Niall was right. Maybe you were just brain washing me into staying here. What was it? Stockholm Syndrome?" He asked bitterly, and I growled.

"You're seriously going to believe that asshole!?" I yelled, hating the fact that he took what Niall said into account. He was just being jealous and stupid, like always. How the hell could he believe him?

"That asshole happens to be my best friend!" He declared. I rolled my eyes and said "He also happens to be in love with you, but you never wanted him, did you? No. But you wanted me even after I treated you like shit! Got a thing for that, Harry?" I know I was acting like a total shit, and I was crossing the line here, but I was pissed and hurt right now. Two emotions I handle poorly.

"FUCK YOU!" Harry yelled, walking up to me and hitting my chest while he cried and just lashed out on me. I felt so broken for him, but I wouldn't let it show. Not now. Not when he chose to believe the world over me.

"No, fuck you. But wait," I said as I grabbed his wrists so he was no longer able to hit me. "I already did, didn't I?" I asked rhetorically, and his eyes flashed with something close to hurt. "Guess I got what I wanted, didn't I?" I asked, but it was far from the truth because I wanted so much more. I wanted Harry forever and always.

"No." He cried out. "No, you love me. Y-you l-love me, Louis." He cried, trying to grip my shirt into his fists, but I chuckled darkly, well, I did my best with all this pain in my chest.

I shook my head and said "I didn't love you, Harry. I never did." I dropped his hands and turned my back on him. I knew that I was being stupid with my actions right now, but I didn't want to admit that Harry was right. This could all be ending right now due to my mistake, and Harry would be taken away anyway. Better to rip the bandage off before right? I had no idea, but each step I took away from him felt heavier than the last. It was like my heart was crumbling, and I finally got my hand on the door knob when I was brought back to life a bit.

Harry pulled me to him and looked me in the eyes, whispering one word. "Please." I knew what he wanted. He wanted me to just put this behind us. He was willing to put this behind us, but he was right. I fucked up, and who knows what will happen next?

He pulled me into a kiss, and I fought my urge to kiss back. He seemed desperate, and I felt his salty tears mix into the kiss, but I couldn't just forget my mistake. I possibly lost Harry, but maybe he would be better without me.

I pulled away and shook my head before walking out of the room and deciding to lock it behind me before he could follow me out. I leaned against the door and tried not to cry as I heard him yell from the other side, pulling on the door knob to try and open it.

"NO! LOUIS, PLEASE! YOU LOVE ME! YOU LOVE ME! YOU FUCKING LOVE ME, LOUIS! I KNOW YOU DO! Please." He said, his voice getting weaker as he cried. "I love you. So much." I heard him whisper before I finally felt a tear on my cheek. I inhaled a breath and turned, walking into my room and regretting my decision.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LIAM

"Niall, Louis just-" I tried to explain about his anger and everything, but he just shook his head as he pushed away from me.

"It's fine. We were both at fault this time. I'm gonna go use the restroom. Maybe shower and calm down." He said, and I nodded before he just walked away, leaving Zayn and I alone.

Zayn sat in the couch with a sigh, putting his hands over his face. "Crap." He whispered. "Why is everything falling apart now?" He asked. He seemed very distraught about it, so I sat next to him and laid his head on my shoulder, pressing a kiss to his temple.

"I don't know, love. I can tell you that even if this all falls apart, we won't. I honestly love you so much, Zayn. I wish I would have known it sooner, but we're here now, and I won't give it up for anything." I said.

"I love you, too, Liam. I just... what if we really do get caught? We'd all go to jail, which I understand. We've commited crimes, so it would only be right, but I'm still terrified of it. I mean, you know what happens in jail. Guys that haven't seen a girl in so long get these urges. It just brings things back, and I don't-" I cut him off by pressing my lips to his. He didn't need to explain. I knew what he was scared of.

"I know. I know, babe." I whispered, feeling anger burn through me at just the thought of someone touching Zayn. The thing is, I can see why he would be most worried. It was obvious that Zayn was very attractive, and that would get tons of attention. Louis and I weren't as desireable as he would be, and we could take care of ourselves.

"I just... I don't know. I'm sorry." He said, voice cracking a bit like he wanted to cry as he hid his face in my neck. I felt so bad for him because I never wanted him to feel this way. It was horrible to know he was reliving that day in his head out of all the fear he could possibly muster up.

I hugged him to me, feeling his hands fist my shirt and hold me just as close to him. He was shaking in fear at the very thought of having to relive a moment like that. But I wouldn't let that happen. Nobody would ever hurt him as long as I was around. Because Zayn was mine. He was my everything.

"I would never let that happen, you know?" I asked him gently, hoping he would calm down just a bit. "I would never let anyone hurt you. I'd always be there for protect you, Zayn. I absolutely love every little things about you, and nobody hurts the people I love. I'd go absolutely insane if someone so much as touched you, let alone make a comment about doing so." I said, and Zayn nodded against my shoulder but still spoke up.

"You can't protect me from the world, Liam. Not from everything." He said, and I knew that. Some things would be out of my control, but I could try. I could try protecting him from any harm. He's already been through so much, and I would hate if he was ever challenged like that ever again.

I sighed a bit and said "Yeah. I know I can't. But I can try. I will try because I love you. I love you and I never want to see you in any type of pain. You mean more to me than you probably even know, Z. So, I will try to protect you from even the smallest things." I declared.

He pulled out of my hold a bit and looked into my eyes, probably seeing if I was telling the truth or not, and I was. Zayn smiled a bit, that pretty little smile that made me just want to kiss his lips, so I did.

I leaned in and kissed him, putting all of my emotions for him into that kiss. It was my unspoken promise to protect him from everything that could ever try and harm him, and to never let him have to relive that fear.

I pulled away from the kiss a little but kept out lips touching. "I promise." I whispered before pulling him back in again. He nodded as we were kissing, and I knew that he knew I meant it. That was all I needed, his belief in that.

"I love you, Liam." He said as we pulled away for air. I smiled at him, my heart just filling with so much love and joy as he said those words.

"Yeah? I thought you would totally blow me off." I joked a bit, and Zayn laughed as he punched my shoulder.

"Shut up, idiot." He mumbled, and I smiled as I kissed him once more and turned his little pout into a smile. "But I love you, too." I finally said.

He smirked and pulled me into another kiss. He simply took my breath away, both figuratively and literally, and I loved him with all of my heart.


	30. Nightmares

HARRY

Numb. I felt numb all over as I cried against the door, my small pleas for Louis to come back still proving to be ineffective, but I still tried. "Louis. Please. Please." I cried, but I knew he didn't even hear me. He already walked away.

I curled up against the door and laid down. I couldn't stop crying, not that I even wanted to. It hurt so much. Louis was the only person I think I could ever love. He loved me. He loved me. He had to love me.

Maybe none of this was actually happening. Maybe it's just a dream. Oh, how I wish this was just a dream. Not all of it, just the painful parts because if Louis himself were a dream, I would hate life when I woke up.

He was perfect in every single way. I gave a dry chuckle as more tears fell. Funny how he just broke me to pieces with his words, and all I can think about is how perfect he is. But he is perfect, and I would never deny that fact.

Even if he didn't love me. No. He loved me. He loved me. He has to love me. "Please love me." I cried out, wishing Louis would come back into the room and just hold me and tell me he was just kidding. Why can't it just be like that? Why can't we just put this behind us? Why can't he just hold me and tell me he loves me, too?

Deep down I knew he won't. As much as I wish he would, Louis was strong. He was strong even without me, but I was weak without him. I hated everything right now. I wanted it all to just disappear and wash away. I didn't want to feel the break in my heart that was getting more severe with each passing second. Each second made me realize that this was real. Louis actually said the words he said. He said he didn't love me. But he had to love me. Fuck! He had to love me!

"Louis... please." I choked out through my sobs. No matter how long I begged and pleaded, he never cane back to the room. Never. He didn't need me. He didn't love me.

I cried furisously, standing up and attempting to wipe at my tears, but more only fell in their place. "FINE! I DON'T NEED YOU! I DON'T FUCKING NEED YOU!" I yelled at the door, punching at it and kicking it, trying to get some sort of reaction out of Louis. Even anger. I needed him to do something. Yell at me. Hit me. Just come back to me!

"YOU'RE A FUCK UP, LOUIS! YOU HEAR ME!? I FUCKING HA- I HATE YOU!" I yelled, choking on the lie the first time. "YOU'RE A LIAR! A WORTHLESS LIAR AND I DON'T LOVE YOU!" I yelled out, banging on the door with all I had, but nobody came. Nobody came. I was all alone.

"I'm sorry!" I cried out right after. "I'm sorry! I love you, Louis! Shit! I love you so much!" I cried, feeling my legs give out as I fell to the floor against the bed. "I love you. You love me. That's the way it has to be." I sang out a bit, feeling like I was losing my mind.

"My heart fits with yours." I whispered, remembering when Louis said that. I grabbed onto the necklace he gave me, holding it tightly, even if it hurt my hand and made little indents where I was gripping it at. I didn't care. It hurt less than the pain that was inside.

It was scary that I needed Louis, but that didn't matter. I just needed him. Everything would be okay if he would just love me. He loves me. He has to. It was his promise.

I cried against the side of the bed, looking at the door and hoping it would just open and Louis would rush in apologizing. It never did.

I felt my eyelids get heavy, and I welcomed sleep. Maybe sleep could help to take the pain away. Make me forget, just for a second. Even if the afterwake will hurt so much more. Maybe I deserved it. Maybe I didn't deserve Louis. I didn't deserve Louis.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I opened my eyes and saw that I was sat in the middle of a room. That same room they took me into when they made me call my parents, only this time there were mirrors. Mirrors all around me like in a ballet studio. I hated them. I hated them because if I looked in them, I could see myself.

I sat in the middle of them, keeping my head tucked on my knees because the mirrors made me just want to scream. Yell. Cry. I didn't have the strength to look at them.

"Harry." I heard a beautiful voice say. I looked up quickly then, seeing Louis walk into the circle of mirrors. He looked gorgeous, as always, and it made me even more ashamed of the way I looked.

He walked up to me and kneeled down by me. "What's wrong, love? Why are you so upset?" He asked me. Because you don't love me anymore. I wanted to say that, but when I opened my mouth something else came out.

"Because nobody loves me. I'm hideous. I'm unlovable." I mumbled out, feeling like I need to cry, but the tears wouldn't fall. It was like just seeing Louis made it all better somehow. He cupped my cheek, and it felt like he was really there, like his touch was on me.

"I will always love you, Harry. You're my beautiful boy." He said. He took my hand and stood me up. He lifted my chin up, leaning in to me, and whispered "I love you."

He moved out of the way and I looked in the mirror, seeing nothing but a waste of space. The crying made me look even worse than I usually did. Red rimmed eyes and messed up hair. My lip was red and chapped from biting it, and I hated everything about it. I squeezed my eyes shut and felt Louis's arms wrap around me.

"Open your eyes, Harry." He said in a soft, yet demanding voice. I opened my eyes, and we were in Louis's bedroom infront of that mirror he had. All of the memories played through my mind. All the things that Louis said to me as we stared into the mirror.

"You're eyes are so beautiful. So enchanting. Always have been. Always will be. Those eyes hold my world, Harry." He whispered. "Your lips are so pretty. So pink and kissable. I love them so much. Love how they always respond so well to mine. And your hair is so soft. So curly. I love running my fingers through it. You're absolutely beautiful in every single way, baby. It hurts that you see yourself as anything but. You're so perfect to me. You're my world." He said, and I shook my head.

"I can't be your world. I'm broken. I'm nothing." I said, wanting to close my eyes, but Louis shook his head and pressed a kiss to my forehead. It felt so real.

"You're everything, Harry. You complete me. I'm broken, too. Remember? Your broken pieces-"

"Fit with yours." I finished for him, and he smiled fondly at me and nodded. "I love you, Louis." I choked out in a sob. I moved in to hug him and kiss him, but he stepped back. I blinked in confusion, and when I opened my eyes, we were surrounded by mirrors again in a dark room. Louis was reflected in each one.

He gave a dark chuckle and I felt weak. Weak and alone. Weak and so very vulnerable to anything and everything he had to say to me. "You're so stupid for falling for that. I could never love you, Harry. Stop wishing I will. You're nothing! Nothing at all! Nothing but a waste of space! Look at yourself!" He yelled. He disappeared from the mirrors and I saw myself.

I was anything but beautiful. I was a wreck. I was hideous. I was weak. I was such a shame to look at. I was nothing. Absolutely nothing. Nothing without Louis. Nothing without the other half of my heart.

"You're hideous! You're a waste of air! A hideous creation! You're a fucked up mistake that could never be loved!" He yelled out, and I shook my head, squeezing my eyes shut.

I shook my head rapidly as I covered my ears with my hands, trying to block out Louis's voice. It sounded like Louis, but it was dark and ruthless. It was the Louis that he was before me. All his anger in that tone of voice. All his anger towards me.

"Stop... please." I whimpered, and I heard him chuckle darkly. He was in the shadows. I could feel it. Just watching me with satisfaction at my caving.

"Aww, are you gonna cry? Gonna cry because nobody even wants you around? Because nobody loves you?" He asked, and I shook my head.

"People love me. My mum and dad. Niall. Liam and Zayn. You. You love me, Louis. You love me! You love me! Please stop!" I cried, feeling the mirrors get closer, almost trapping me in them. And I did feel trapped. So claustrophobic and ugly right now.

"Are you sure?" He asked, and I found myself opening my eyes, looking right at the mirror that stood at my toes. My reflection. Myself. My worst enemy.

"No..." I croaked. I glared at my reflection, hating the way I looked. Hating everything about myself. Every little aspect of myself. "No. Because nobody could love you. Nobody could love your sorry self. You are worthless!" I spit at myself.

"I hate you. I hate everything about you. I hate you! I hate you! You made Louis hate me! Because of you, he doesn't love me! I hate you! You deserve to die! You can't do anything right! You can't help anyone! You're a weak, ugly waste of life! I hate you so much! I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! I HATE ME!" I screamed, and the mirrors broke, glass flting everywhere, but all I could do is cry and fall to my knees. I hated myself. And I knew why. Because I'm nothing. Nothing at all. And this was all my fault.

"I love you, Louis." I cried out with the last of my strength, and I swear I heard his reply. So faint and far away. So far. It seemed unreal. But it was there. I swear it was.

"I love you, angel."  
\------------------------------------------------------

ZAYN

It was getting pretty late. Niall was sitting in the armchair, staring longingly out of the window with a cup of hot chocolate in his hand- still full after almost an hour. He seemed pretty upset, and I knew exactly why. The news he found out about Harry and about Louis just trying to help his family probably hit him hard. The fight was intense, and it got way out of hand.

I wanted to say something, but I just felt so tired. I was laying in Liam's arms, and it was really comfortable. The thing was, now that I had Liam, I was so afraid to lose him, especially after finding out the cops saw Louis. Well, the back of him.

I felt Liam rub my arm as he held me close, and I closed my eyes for a second, savoring the moment and keeping it inside of my brain. I opened my eyes and turned to look at him. He looked at me expectantly and I spoke.

"We need to talk to them. Try to fix everything that's breaking apart here. Even if it may not be our problem to them, it still is. They're all our friends. We need to help them all." I said, and Liam sighed.

"I agree. There's a lot of damage control to be done here. So, who do you want to talk to?" He asked, giving me the option, but I really didn't know. It was hard to choose. They all needed help, but who could I help best?

"I think you should talk to Louis." Liam said, and I looked at him with a bit of doubt on my face. "Think about it. You've known him the longest. You've been his friend the longest. You know what it's like to be so angry at the world. You know what it's like to love someone and have them pissed off at you for something you did and not give you a chance, which I'm sorry for now because I love you so much, Zayn." He said, and I nodded. I guess it did make sense.

"It's okay. I love you, too, Liam. And, yeah, I guess that does make sense. Guess it's just a bit scary to talk to him when he's like this. You know? I feel like he's so broken right now. If he's not gonna yell at me, he may cry, and I have no idea which is worse. The yelling is scary, but the crying is something that never truly happens often." I said.

"You'll know what to do, though. You always do. It'll be alright, yeah?" He asked, and I nodded. I would figure out what to do and what to say, but Louis never makes it easy. It will be a challenge to get through to him.

"Hmm. I love you." I said as I closed my eyes and snuggled into Liam's chest, enjoying the bit of warmth before I had to go talk to Louis.

"I love you, too. Now, you talk to Louis. I'll handle Niall." He said. I ligted my head up and Liam met me halfway, pressing a chaste kiss to my lips before I got up from the couch. I looked at Niall, sitting with an upset look by the window. We had to take care of this whole thing. We just had to.

I walked out of the living room, still feeling Liam's eyes on me. It made me feel assured that he would be here if I needed him for anything.

I made my way down the hallway, going to walk to Louis's room, but I stopped when I heard talking in Niall's room. I pressed my ear against it and heard Louis whispering in a broken voice. "I'm sorry I hurt you so much." He paused for a second before saying "I love you, angel."

I slowly opened the door, seeing Louis press a kiss to Harry's forehead. He was asleep on the bed, and I just knew something went terribly wrong between them as well. He seemed so broken and fragile, which is new for Louis.

"Lou..." I said softly. His head snapped up to me, and he smiled a bit.

"Funny how I always manage to fuck shit up, huh Zayn? Always finding a way to ruin anything good in my life. Guess that's just the way I am. The way it has to be." He said. He looked down at Harry, running a hand through his hair before he looked back up at me with tears falling down his cheeks. His eyes were so red and he looked like a different person. The Louis that he was before all the anger.

"I love him so much it hurts, Zayn. All I want... he's all I want. I would give every little thing up. The anger, the money we've stolen, my freedom. I'd give everything up for him. He's everything to me, but I messed that up." He cried.

"What happened, Louis? Between you two." I asked. I felt so bad for him right now. I knew what he meant by always ruining everything that made him happy. Louis tended to push it away. Whatever it may be. And I did the same to Liam. He has a chance to fix it all though.

"I told him I never loved him. I told him I just used him to sex, and that I never loved him. Why the hell would anyone say that? Why did I say that? He means everything to me. Of course I love him. All the times we slept together, every touch, every word... it all meant to much to me, but I told him it didn't mean a thing. Why am I so fucked up, Zayn?" He asked in a weak voice.

"You're not. You're not fucked up, Louis. And if you are, so what? We're all fucked up somehow. All in our own ways. You went through things that changed your view on the world, we all did. The only difference is that you continue to punish yourself. You chose to push Harry away. Why? Did you think it would hurt less? Did you think that because he didn't trust you, it was all over? Did you think he didn't care anymore? Why Louis?" I asked him, and he shook his head.

"I don't know. I don't know why. I guess I'm just scared." He said, seeming to be admitting it to himself as well as to me. It was a big step if he was admitting that right now.

"Scared of what, Lou?" I asked cautiously, not wanting to set him off in any sort of rampage or anything. I guess I did okay because Louis replied calmly to me, if not completely torn.

"Of a lot of things. Scared of being wrong. Scared of hurting others. Scared of being happy. Scared of ruining things for other people. Scared of ruining things for myself. Scared of ever goign back to that dark place where I was just an angry person. Scared of losing Harry. Scared of having him taken away from me. Scared that he's right. That they will come and this will all be over because of my stupid mistake that night." He confessed, and I understood that. I understood it all.

"You can't live in that fear, Louis. It's okay to be scared, but not to shape your life around your fears. You have to take the chance of going through them. You're scared of being wrong, so you always try to keep authority. You're scared of hurting others, so you try to take all the anger out with yells instead of fists. You're scared of being happy, so you try and lie to yourself about your true feelings for Harry. You're scared of ruining things for other people, so you act heartless to not get involved in their problems. You're scared of ruining things for yourself, but that's only making you ruin things. You're scared of being angry, but you're so depressed. You're scared of losing Harry, so you let him go first. You pushed him away instead of them taking him away, but you're only causing yourself pain. And him. You're causing him pain." I concluded.

"But I'm not good for him, Zayn. I'm just a low life that was mever supposed to be a part of his life." He said, looking down at Harry, but I saw the tears pouring out of his eyes at the realization that he was only hurting himself and the boy he loved.

"But you are a part of his life, and there must be a reason why. He needs love, and so do you. Regardless of anything either of you have done wrong. Face it, without each other both of you are broken and incomplete." I said, trying to make him understand that.

He looked down at Harry again and sniffled, wiping away some stray tears. "What do I do, Zayn?" He sobbed, and I gave him the simplest answer there was.

"You fix this relationship."


	31. Needing to Talk

LIAM

I watched as Zayn left the room, just feeling so much love and fondness towards him. I knew he really wanted to fix this, and I did, too. It may be unusual, but Louis was actually a really great person. He just hid behind layers of hurt and anger. People hardly saw the good in him, but you get glimpses after being his friend for years.

I looked at Niall and made my way over to sit across from him. "How you holding up?" I asked him. He turned to look at me in surprise and shrugged before looking down at his cup in his hands.

"I don't know. Finding that stuff out about Harry... and then Louis just trying to be a decent person. I don't know how to feel. Stupid. Completely idiotic, really." He said. I understood that it probably all shocked him very much.

"Yeah, but you didn't know about any of it." I tried to comfort him, but that only seemed to rile him up a bit.

"Exactly! I didn't know! How the hell didn't I notice anything!? Especially about Harry! I was supposed to be his best friend! The person he could depend on! I spent all my time in my own self-pity, just being so upset that he didn't love me back, that I didn't notice how hurt and broken he was!" He cried out.

He set his cup down on the ground and stood up, pacing back and forth as he continued speaking. "I don't even know what to do now? Do I tell Harry I'm sorry? Does he even want me to be sorry? Did he ever even want me to find out? What if that causes bigger problems between him and Louis?" He asked, and that questioned caught my attention.

"Why would that matter to you? I thought you hated Louis?" I asked carefully. I didn't want to offend Niall or tick him off in any way. The last thing we needed was for there to be another fight in this house.

"I mean, he's not my favorite person in the world, but he tried to help my family. He also makes Harry happy, as much as that sucks. I have always loved Harry, but it seems like Louis is the only one he wants. I won't give up, but I won't split them up either. That's up to Harry to decide. Still, if Louis makes him happy, if he tried to help out my family, people he doesn't even know, then he can't be that bad of a guy, now can he?" He asked. It seemed to be rhetorical, so I didn't really give an answer.

"He isn't. Not really. I've seen Louis do things out of kindness, but he likes to pretend he has a heart of darkness. The truth is, Louis's just scared. Just like all the rest of us. Scared of trusting. Scared of feeling. Scared of love-"

"Scared of losing. Losing love. Losing at his goals in life. It's why he doesn't set many or get close to anyone, isn't it?" Niall asked. I was a bit shocked that Niall got all that frok only knowing Louis for a short period of time, but then again, Louis is a lot like an open book since Harry.

"I guess so." I replied. "I mean, nobody really knows what happened in Louis's past. Nobody but Harry. He's the only person that's ever broken through Louis's shell that way and gotten to know him in depths. It's actually pretty amazing how he's managed to do that. Especially in such a short amount of time." I said.

"Harry can do that to you. He's just such an amazing person. Whem I first met him, I was the only one alone on the swings at the playground. He came over to me and asked if I needed anyone to push me. I instantly had a crush on him then. I didn't know I loved him until middle school. Everyone seemed to notice how beautiful and amazing he was, and it made me jealous. I was so possessive over him because I was afraid of losing him, but I didn't need to be. You know why?" He asked me, his voice cracking a bit as tears fell from his eyes.

I shook my head, not able to find my voice right now, just shcoked that Niall was actually telling me this. "Because when Harry loves, it's with all of his heart. He said he would always be my best friend. He would always be there for me. So when the so-called 'popular kids" wanted him to sit at their table and hang out with them, he turned them down, saying he'd much rather be by my side instead. I never had to be so worried because I was all Harry had, and he was all I had. And I know that now that he has Louis, he will still be my bestfriend. It's just so hurtful and scary to know that he loves someone else when I love him. It's scary because I don't want to lose him. Still, I know that Louis shouldn't be afraid to lose him out of the blue because Harry always stays with those he loves." He finished. He sat down again and put his head in his hands, crying into them, and I felt a bit bad for him.

What if Zayn decided he loved someone else when I loved him? How would I react to that? Would I be like Niall and just wait for things to go my way, or would I be the horrible sabotage? Truth be told, I might fight to get him back. Did that make Niall a better person than I was? I had no idea, but I do know one thing.

"Why are you telling me this? This sounds like something you should say to Louis." I said, making Niall look up at me in shock. He was about to start protesting, but I held my hand up to stop him. He needed to talk to Louis. They may not like each other, but they had one thing in common.

"Listen, you both love Harry. You both want Harry happy, right?" I asked him, and he nodded. "Then try and work this out. At least give it a try. What would make Harry happier than for his best friend and his boyfriend to work things out?" I asked.

"He kidnapped him. You all did." Niall stated bluntly, and while he had a point, I also knew he just didn't want to talk to Louis.

"I know. Trust me, I know. But Harry is mad because he's scared, too. Not of us. He's scared of losing Louis. As his best friend, you need to be there for him." I said. Niall sighed and nodded before picking up his hot chocolate again and taking a sip before spitting it back into the cup and making a face.

"That's not hot anymore." He commented, and I laughed. "I'll talk to him. But-"

"You should!" I interrupted and he tried again.

"But if he tries to kill me, I am yelling your name out. You better save me, Liam." He said, and I nodded in all seriousness. He was clearly terrified, and I didn't want to scare him even more, but Louis wouldn't kill him. Harry cared about him too much for Louis to kill him.

"Here goes." He breathed out as he got up from the couch and began to walk down the hall. He stopped at the corner and said "Remember. Save me if I call." I smiled at that and nodded again, trying to surpress my laugh.

He gave a curt nod and then walked down the hall. Maybe things would be okay tonight?  
\------------------------------------------------------

NIALL

Did I want to be alone with Louis? No. Did I think he would kill me? Yes. Was I afraid? No. Okay, yes. Still, Liam was right, I had to at least try and let Louis know that I was sorry and that I was thankful for him trying to help my family. I also needed to let him know how stupid he was to risk getting caught because Harry was afraid to lose him, too.

I was walking to where I knew Louis's room was, but jumped a bit when I saw Zayn walked out of my room suddenly. "Jesus!" I said and he looked at me in confusion before realizing he scared me.

"Oh, sorry, mate. Um, Louis's in there. Just so... just so you know. He'll be out soon if you wanna wait." He said, but I shook my head and made my way to the door. Zayn took his hand off the doorknob and I grabbed it instead.

"He's just the person I'm looking for actually. Really need to talk to him about something." I said. He looked a bit confused, but I only opened the door and froze as I saw Louis just holding Harry, admiring him, and... crying.

I didn't want to interrupt because I know I was the one person Louis never wanted to seem weak infront of. I was basically the enemy to him. He'd hate if I saw him cry, but then again, it may be easier to get through to him this way.

I stood by the door for a while, just watching the scene play out infront of me. He ran his fingers through Harry's hair as he slept, and I heard him whisper to him. It was so faint I could barely hear it, but the silence of the room helped out.

"I'm so sorry I fucked up, Haz. I really love you with all I have, but I'm not good enough for you. I'll never be good enough for you. You're too good. You need someone better than me, but I still don't think he'd even be good enough for you because you are everything. Too good." He finished with a small nod, another tears slipping out of his eye, and I decided to speak up then.

"He really is." I said, and Louis quickly looked up at me before wiping his eyes and moving out from under Harry's head. "I was just leaving. No need for me to be here." He said, but I spoke up again. This was nerve-wrecking.

"Louis, can I talk to you?" I asked. He looked a bit shocked, confused, and guarded, but I would be, too if I was in his position. He nodded and walked to the door. I was a bit confused on why he was trying to leave still, but he turned to me and said "Not in here. It won't go well if Harry wakes up to see me."

I followed him out of the room, and he led me to his. I felt a bit uncomfortable being inside his room- this was his territory- but then again, the whole dang house was anyway!

"Just say what you need to say. Tell me how royally I've fucked up and that I messed up Harry because I already know. Tell me that you could love him so much better than I could because, as much as that fact hurts, I know that, too. Tell me that if we get caught, it's my fault, because I get that. I know every little thing that could possibly come out of your mouth to insult me, so whatever you want to say just say it and-"

"Thank you." I spoke up. He stopped mid-sentence and looked at me in surprise. "Oh." He said before it fell silent between us. I could feel th awkwardness drift through the air. It was very uneasy, but I had to do this.

"Wait, why?" He asked, and I wanted to roll my eyes at that.

"For trying to help my family out. Leaving them that money. For not hurting Harry as badly as some other kidnapper could have. For making Harry actually love someone. For..." Shit this part was hard to say! "For understanding him. For hearing how miserable he was when I never even knew. I never knew he was so broken up inside, and I just know now that I could never be the one to fix that because he doesn't want me. Not like I want him. No, he wants you." I said. Admitting it aloud certainly made it a whole lot more real.

"He wants you, Louis. Harry has never, never ever loved someone before. He's never taken a liking to someone that way. Never. Not even the millions of girls and guys at our school. Not the big shots with all the money like he had. Nobody. No one. Until you." I said, trying to get this all off of my chest and not hold back. Who cares if Louis sees how vulnerable I am? Or how much I care about Harry? It doesn't scare me. Not anymore at least.

"I guess there's something about you that caught his eye. Or maybe it was just meant to be- like some sort of twisted soul mate shit. I have no clue, but for whatever reason, Harry wants you. He... holy hell... he l- he loves you. I can tell." I said, and Louis smiled a bit at that, but then frowned again and shook his head.

"He can't love me. I don't love him." He said, and that fired me up.

"Honestly, Louis, you expect me to believe that? That's the biggesy load of bullshit I've ever heard!" I yelled at him, and he glared at me a bit, but I kept on going. I wasn't doing this for Louis. I was doing this for Harry.

"It's so obvious, Louis! From the way you look at him to how soft and sweet you get around him! Everyone in this house sees it! I've only known you for a little while, but I know that he's changed the way you see things. And I honestly don't take you as one to cry, so obviously he's made you feel new emotions you've never felt before. Plus, Liam told me he's the only one you've opened up and told your past to. You love him, Louis. You love him a lot." I said, hating the words.

"So what if I do? So do you, and I don't see you kissing him and telling him everything will be okay. It's not! I mean, it could be, but what if they saw me? Then what?" He asked, getting a bit testy.

"Okay, one, I am not doing those things because he doesn't love me. He loves you. He wouldn't believe me anyways if I said it would be okay. I've only seem you calm him down from things. You have a hold on him. A hold I wish I had." I mumbled the ending more to myself than to Louis.

"And if they did see you, and if this is all coming to an end, why not make every last moment count? Why push Harry away?" I asked. Truth be told, I was amazed he even had it in him to push Harry away because he seemed so infatuated and possessive over him. It was shocking really.

"Because it'll hurt less. It'll hurt him less than if they took him away from me." He replied, looking like he wanted to cry again, but I know he wouldn't. Not infront of me.

"Wow. You really think that?" I asked him in amazement. "If you think you're right about that then you clearly don't know Harry." I said, and instantly regretted it when that set him off.

"I do know Harry! I know him better than anyone, and he knows me better than anyone ever will! Because he didn't fucking judge me the very moment he saw me! Not like you! Not like everyone else! All they see if this evilness. This anger that shines through, but Harry actually took a chance to look deeper. And... and I changed because of him. So, you know what? Don't tell me I don't know Harry because I fell in love with him. I know him." He said.

"You still hurt him. You are hurting him right now. And you can fix it if you just go in that room and try!" I yelled back, ready to call Liam if I needed him.

"No, I really can't. I told him I didn't love him, how the hell do you make someone believe you do after that? He's broken up inside. I've caused enough damage to him, and I won't cause anymore. Maybe him going home would be the best thing for him." He said, and I shook my head.

"Screw you! He doesn't want to go home!" I yelled, but Louis stayed silent, so I figured we were done talking. This really went nowhere. He's really just an ignorant fucker.

"I don't know what Harry sees in your or why he wants to stay, but for his sake, I hope he gets over it soon. For your sake, I hope you stop acting so childish and actually go and fix things with the man you love before someone else steals him away." I said, and Louis raised an eyebrow at that, a smirk forming on his face, and I knew Louis smirking was bad news.

"Oh really? Who? You? Think you've been down that lane before, Niall. Haven't you?" He stood up from where he was sitting and walked towards me. I backed up as he took steps forward, and pretty soon I was out in the hallway as he held onto the door.

"And you should know why he doesn't want to leave. What was your theory? Stockholm syndrome?" He asked before he closed the door in my face. I hated Louis. I really fucking hated him.

"You don't deserve Harry!" I yelled, banging my fist on the door before sighing in frustration and deciding to just get some rest. This was a long day.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LOUIS

"You don't deserve Harry!" I heard Niall yell on the otherside of the door, and he was right. He was so right.

"I know." I whispered, hating myself more than ever before.


	32. Staying Strong and Breaking Down

ZAYN

There was so much drama in the house now. Harry walked around like nothing mattered anymore, Louis seemed to avoid everyone, and whenever he and Niall just happened to be in the same room, they would end up yelling and fighting with each other. It was frustrating and exhausting.

"I hate this!" I sighed out as I laid in bed beside Liam. Everyone else went to sleep a while ago, I made sure of that. Didn't need another random fight between Louis and Niall tonight.

Liam wrapped his arms around me and said "I do, too. I'm all one for being there for your friends, but this... this is just getting to be too much." I nodded, agreeing with his statement.

I groaned and snuggled my face into Liam's chest as I said "Why can't they just make up already?" We both knew who I was implying in that statement, and I felt Liam shrug a bit as he traced random patterns onto my back, making me shiver a bit from his touch.

"I don't know. I know that they are both dealing with quite a bit of things right now, though. I think it has more to do with their own fears and insecurities. Nothing will be resolved until they get over those. But I know they'll be fine. They have to be. Those two are meant for each other." He said.

I nodded before snuggling deeper against Liam and closing my eyes. I wasn't planning on sleeping yet- just enjoying Liam's hold on me. It was always so warm and inviting, and I couldn't help but love him even more in these moments.

It was silent until Liam spoke up again. "Zayn, do you feel like we're meant to be together?" He asked, almost in a fearful tone. I looked up at him, seeing that he actually did look a bit fearful and hesitant about his question.

"If you mean like soul mates and stuff, I don't know. I don't really know about that stuff." I said, and he looked a bit hurt by my words, probably hoping for a simple yes from me. Still, I wasn't finished, and hopefully what I had to say would make him feel better.

"I don't know about that stuff because I have never felt this way before about anybody. I've never been so in love with someone until you. I've never truly wanted someone until you. Would I love to spend the rest of my life with you? Yes. Do I know if that will happen? No. But I do know that this... being together... it feels so right." I finished, and Liam stared at me intensely before leaning in and kissing me.

I immediately felt him begging for entrance, and I immediately allowed him it, letting our tongues brush together. The taste of Liam was very addicting, and I won't ever get use to it.

He broke the kiss and trailed his way down my neck as he said "God, I love you so much, Zayn." I breathed out a reply of my own love for him, and I felt my whole body getting hot as every little thing he did began to turn me on.

"Liam... fuck!" I moaned out as his hand traveled down my chest and his lips found my soft spot. I was thankful that we were hardly wearing any clothing, considering the fact that we were going to bed. I only had on sweats as Liam had on boxers. It made everything feel hot and heavy so quickly.

"Do you want to top, Z?" Liam asked me, trailing kisses down my chest. It all felt so good, and Liam felt so good inside of my last time, but I really wanted to just ram into him repeatedly. And I knew he would let me do that if I wanted to.

I flipped us over with no warning and kissed him again before my hands traveled to his thighs, lightly trailing my fingertips up towards his boxers. I felt him shiver from the touch as he moaned into my mouth. "Zayn, I need you. So badly." He whimpered.

"Patience, Li." I whispered before slowly pulling his boxers down. I wanted to drive him a little crazy and on edge before giving in to what I knew we both desperately wanted.

I took him in my hand and began to pump him slowly, enjoying the little gasps of pleasures that he let out. He seemed to already be in a sort of pleasurable daze, and I knew it wouldn't take long until he was begging for it.

I crawled down until my face was infront of where I was pumping him. I flicked my tongue out and licked the tip, watching as Liam whined and squirmed a bit. "Zayn... please. Please please please." He begged, and even I wasn't so cruel as to hold back anymore.

I took him in my mouth, hallowing out my cheeks as I felt his tip hit my throat. His hands came to grab my hair and tugged at it as he gasped from the sudden warmth around him.

He tasted so damn good, and I loved the fact that I could cause him instant pleasure like this. I always just wanted to take care of him like this. I wanted to be the one that he loves and the one that he would always come to when he needed pleasure. I just wanted him and everything connected to him.

"So good, Zayn." He moaned, and I responded with my own moan, feeling his fingers tighten in my hair at the sudden vibration. "I'm so close, babe. So close." He said, and I felt him shaking a bit with the need to come, and right when I heard his harsh breathing turn into pants, I pulled off. He let out a whine at that, but it quickly turned into a whimper as I kissed up his chest and latched onto a spot near his collar bone.

"I need you in me, love." He whispered to me, and I just felt so intoxicated by him now that I would surrender to his need. I pulled my sweats off and climbed back over Liam. "Need to prep you first, Li. Want just my fingers or want me to eat you out?" I asked, and he let out a deep breath before shuddering and saying "Want your tongue, please."

I nodded and kissed his shoulder. "I'll take care of you, babe. I'm here." I moved back down and Liam immediately spread his legs for me. I took all of this to heart. The way that we both got to see this side of each other that nobody else could see. The way that the pleasure was so heavy between the two of us. I loved Liam, and I could only hope this meant as much to him as well. This special bond between us. It would last through the pain and the pleasure.

I leaned forward, seeing his lovely hole just waiting for something to happen. I leaned in and licked a strip over his hole. He tugged at my hair and I pushed them away. I would go at a pace that would please and torture him. 

I gently prodded his hole with my tongue, hearing how he tried to refrain from moaning out loud. It made all of this a whole lot hotter.

I pushed my tongue into him, loving the way his taste filled my senses. It was amazingly sweet. Liam was shaking uncontrollably, but I knew he could last. He could hold on for a while. I poked one finger into his hole beside my tongue, beginning to stretch him a little.

"Z-Z-Zayn. So good. Oh my fuck!" He moaned out. I remember the first time I ever had sex with Liam. The only time back then. He was so loud, though he tried his best to be quiet. I made sure to be gently with him because he has been wounded before. He was hurting, and it was the only way I could think of at the moment to take away the pain. But now, in this moment, I wasn't taking away pain. I was just showing him how incredible he was. How much he meant to me.

"Shh, love. I've got you." I whispered before I pressed kisses to the inside of his thighs, inserting a second finger as I did. I began to scissor him open, and I could tell that he couldn't last much longer before he was going to have to cum.

"Zayn. I have to." He mumbled out, and I kissed on his skin again as I said "It's fine, love. Let go." That was all it took before he was screaming my name and cumming in thick ribbons all over his stomach.

I now had three fingers in him, and he was rocking back on them, begging for more. I licked up all the cum on his stomach and then met him at eye level. "Are you ready?" I asked. He nodded quickly, and then I felt him grip onto my shoulders as I lined up and began to push into him.

"Fuck!" He choked out, and I kissed him to help take his mind of off the pain. It's been a long time since he's been the one on the bottom. I didn't want to hurt him then, and I definitely didn't want to now.

I stopped once I was all the way in, giving him time to adjust to the stretch. "Sorry if it hurts. We'll go as slow as you need." I whispered against his skin. He nodded, and I felt him take my hand in his, intertwining our fingers.

"It's okay. I love you, Zayn." He said, looking straight in my eyes. I felt my heart swell up with love, and said it right back to him. "I love you, Liam." We both leaned in, meeting halfway in a passionate kiss.

"Move." Liam murmured before kissing me deeply once again. I pulled out almost all the way before pushing back in, feeling Liam moan into my mouth. I wanted to make him feel good. I wanted to make him forget about all the drama in this house and just know that even if everything seems to be falling apart right now, we won't be.

I racked my brain, remembering where his prostate was from the first time we had sex. I shifted my hips a bit and then gave a harsh thrust, hitting it dead on. He broke out of the kiss and let out a loud yell of pleasure. It was so hot the way his eyebrows creased down and he had to squeeze his eyes shut in bliss.

I began to pound right on that spot, hitting it repeatedly, watching the completely blissed out look on his face and listening to the sinful noises that fell from his lips. It was all so intense and sexy that it brought me closer to that feeling of cumming.

"Hell. You feel so good, Li. So tight and warm." I praised as I moved to trail kisses down his neck, sucking in some spots to leave hickeys all along his neck. I felt one of his hands fist my hair as the other one clawed onto my back, leaving a stinging pleasure in its wake.

I held him closer by his thighs, spreading his legs a bit further, giving me a better angle to thrust deeply. It felt amazing, and I thrusted harsher and faster, listening to Liam's desperate calls.

"Fuck Zayn! Right there! Yes, babe! So fucking good. I love you. God, I love you." He said, sometimes repeating the same thing over and over again. I moaned out his name a few times along with strings of cuss words, just losing myself in how good it all felt. Losing myself in Liam.

"So close." He panted out between heavy breaths, and I nodded. "Me, too. Same time?" I asked, and he nodded, pulling me into a kiss that was sloppy but full of love. We both moaned into each other's mouths as we came, Liam cumming a split second ahead of me and tightening even more around me. It felt too good to be real.

I pulled out and laid beside Liam, both of us panting and trying to catch our breaths. I rolled over so I was facing him and he was facing me as well. "I love you." I declared with a smile as I pulled him close, not even caring that we were both sweaty and he had cum on his stomach. I loved him and always wanted him close and in my arms.

"I love you, too, Zayn. Sorry it took so long to realize that." He mumbled, sounding sleepy.

"It's okay. We have each other now. And I am never letting you go, Li. Never." I promised, kissing his head as he snuggled into my arms to sleep.  
\------------------------------------------------------

HARRY

I just felt so alone and unloved. Louis has been avoiding me. He never looked at me when we were in the same room. He never spoke to me. Not even to yell at me. I wish he would just yell at me.

I have been crying myself to sleep every night, silently so Niall wouldn't notice. No, we didn't sleep on the bed together. It didn't feel right to sleep by anyone but Louis. I just wanted Louis. So, I was going to sleep on the floor, but Niall insisted he would instead. I felt bad, but too broken to protest.

"How are you holding up, Haz?" Zayn whispered to me the next morning. We were all around the dining room table, and I looked at Louis, probably with a massive amount of desperation on my face. I just wanted him to look at me- just once. I needed Louis, and I know he needed me, too. He wasn't eating. I wasn't either.

"I'm not." I replied, feeling so dead inside. Zayn sighed and rubbed my back for some type of comfort, but it wasn't what I needed. I appreciated it, but it didn't help.

We all looked up as Louis threw his fork on his plate before he got up and left down the hall. I quickly got up and ran after him before anyone could stop me. I just needed to talk to him or get yelled at him. I needed it.

I followed him all the way to his room, stopping the door when he was about it close it shut. "I don't have time for this." He said in a cold voice.

I pushed my way into his room and felt myself shaking in anticipation. "Louis, please. Please just talk to me. Aknowledge me. Do something! It's like I don't even exist, and I know you're hurting, too. Please, Louis." I begged, on the verge of tears already.

"Get out. We don't need to talk. I'm fine. You'll be fine, too as soon as you get over this." He said, still not looking at me. I was hurt. Angry, hurt, upset. I felt so many emotions that I couldn't contain anymore, so I yelled.

"Fuck you, Louis! I won't be okay! And you should know this because I've told you how fucked up I am as well! You were the only thing that kept me hanging on, kept me feeling alive. Now I feel so fucking dead inside that I might as well be dead! I WANT TO FUCKING DIE!" I yelled, crying heavily now. I felt like I was losing my mind.

I tugged on my hair, continuing on. "You said you'd be here for me whenever I was hurt. You're not. You're leaving me alone in the dust! You said I could trust you because you'd never hurt me, but this hurts so much that it feels like something is clawing at my chest from the inside out! I wasn't lying when I said I needed you, Louis! I wasn't lying when I said I loved you either! I love you so fucking much that it hurts to even think about it. I know you love me back. You have to love me back." I cried, walking right up to him and wrapping one arm around his neck, resting my forehead on his.

I heard his breath hitch, and I closed my eyes, feeling so many emotions at touching him again right now. I was crying even more now, unable to contorl my emotions or my breathing. It was all too much. I just wanted Louis back.

"Please say you love me. Just one more time." I begged, wanting so badly to just kiss him and have him hold mean and tell me everything would be alright.

"I..." He began, gulping after he spoke. I needed to hear him say it. Just once. "Harry, I..." He seemed to nervous, and I opened my eyes, seeing him squeeze his shut as he pushed his forehead harsher against mine.

I felt his lips gently brush my own, sending shivers down my spine. I longed for his kiss again. It was addictive to me. I closed my eyes, feeling his breath so close and just hoping he would give in.

"I can't love you." He said, pulling away from me and making me feel even more ripped in two than I was. "I'm not good for you. I never was. You can survive without me. Now leave me alone." He said, turning and walking over beside his bed.

"You do love me. I need you, Louis. You need me. What the fuck are you so afraid of!? That you'll lose me? That I'll fall out of love with you? That I'll be taken away because of your little mistake-" I yelled, wanting to just hit him.

"NOTHING! I'M NOT SCARED OF ANYTHING! I DON'T FUCKING LOVE YOU, HARRY! GET THAT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING BRAINWASHED HEAD! I NEVER DID! YOU KNOW WHAT, I WANT YOU GONE! JUST LEAVE ALREADY BECAUSE THE SOONER YOU DO, THE LESS DRAMA THERE WILL BE AROUND HERE!" He yelled.

I was stunned. He was so loud and so angry. His veins were popping out of his neck and his face was red in anger. I could feel the tears on my cheeks as we both stared at each other, Louis in anger and me in pain. He was right infront of me now, and the way he was just glaring at me made anger boil up inside of me.

I brought my hand up and slapped him hard, seeing my hand print already start to appear on his cheek. "I should have never fucking fell for you." I said, turning to leave his room with my broken heart.

"Harry, wait I lo-"

"NO!" I yelled, pulling my arm away as he tried to grab it. "Just hearing it now would hurt too much." I said so quietly.

"I'm sorry." He said in a broken voice. I couldn't look back at him because I know I would forgive him, and he'd probably break me again.

"Yeah. I am, too." I said in a hoarse voice. I then walked out of the room without looking back.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LOUIS

"I'm sorry." I whispered, leaning against the door after Harry left. "I love you. I'm so madly in love with you. I thought I was protecting you. I love you."

But maybe it was already too late.


	33. Fucked Up

HARRY

I hated everything! I hated the thought of living. Living without Louis. There was just so much pain trapped inside of me. He was the only one that could ease that pain. Nothing else would help. Nothing could take it all away.

I walked back to the room I was sharing with Niall and slammed the door shut, already crying heavily. My chest was heaving with how badly I was crying, and I had a major headache, but I didn't care. Everything could hurt if it took away the emotional pain I was feeling- the longing craving I had to Louis deep inside of me. It seemed to eat me up, and I loved how it hurt.

I loved feeling the pain becauae at least I still felt something towards Louis. He cared enough to cause me pain, right? Yeah. I was losing my mind, but that didn't matter to me right now. All that mattered was the battered hole in my heart, the many shards it broke into that didn't seem to fit together again. You could fix it, but there will always be holes and uneven parts that only Louis could truly mend.

I sat on the bed and cried, feeling stupid. Lost. Useless. Like nothing. I was nothing. What a fool I was to think I was ever something, let alone someone's everything. It hurt too much, but nothing I said or did could take away the pain- the massive stinging inside of me. I felt as if Louis cut me open only to watch me bleed.

I sat there, crying for so long, and then the door opened. I chastised myself for getting my hopes up that it was Louis. I turned and saw it was Niall, looking at me with so much sympathy and sadness on his face.

"Don't do that." I croaked out, and he looked confused. "Don't look at me like I'm pathetic and broken when I already know it. I know I've lost him, and I'm nothing without him." I sat still for a while and then cried out "Niall, what did I do wrong?" 

There were too many tears in my eyes to see things right. Everything was covered in a blurry mess, but wiping my eyes was completely futile. New tears seemed to surface right after anyways. I could only imagine how red they were and how it made me look. Ugly. Too ugly for Louis to love.

"Harry, you're not pathetic, but you are broken. And it's okay to be broken. You told me that. When I used to cry from being picked on and bullied, I said I felt broken inside. You told me it's okay to be broken, as long as you fight and pick up the pieces of yourself again." He said, and I shook my head.

"I didn't know then. I didn't know what it felt like. I knew that I felt pain. I felt lost back then, but never truly broken. Not until now. And it hurts like hell, Niall. God, I have no idea how you ever went through this feeling! It's like your heart is shattered and the pieces are just stabbing at your chest, causing so many wounds you'd be lucky not to bleed out." I said.

He came and sat beside me on the bed and I leaned against him, resting my head on his shoulder as I cried my tears. "That's because you've never felt heartbreak, Harry. You've never known what it felt like. The first time is always the hardest time. But you can survive. You will. If it didn't work out, maybe give it time, but you also have to reason with yourself and see that maybe the person you love so much isn't meant to be yours." He said, and it killed me that he was speaking from self-experience.

I took my head off of his shoulder and stood up, walking away from him. "Fuck." I cried out. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" I yelled, slamming my fist against the wall. I was angry at myself. Not at Niall. Not at Louis. Not at anybody. Only at myself. I was the one who messed things up. I was the reason everything was falling apart. I just had to fall in love with my kidnapper!

"How can you still be my friend if this is how I made you feel?" I asked Niall, not even daring to look at him. "How the hell do you even look at me everyday. This hurts, Niall! It hurts and it feels like I'm not even alive. But somehow the pain won't numb out." I said, putting my head against the wall and just standing there, crying.

"Louis was my everything." I said suddenly, feeling a cold ache in my heart. "He made me feel good about myself. He was the one who fixed my heart. He- he fixed it by becoming a part of it. His heart in mine." I gave a dry laugh, knowing I must sound insane. "We were both falling, but he landed first, and he refused to catch me." I mumbled out, knowing deep down that those words weren't true. He was going to say it. He was going to tell me that he still loved me, but I cut him off. Because he couldn't. I was too messed up to love.

"You know, he made so many promises, and maybe he broke them, but I led him to it." I said, and Niall seemed a bit mad about those words.

"No you didn't, Harry. Nobody led him to do anything. He manages himself. He always has! He is his own person who makes his own decisions. You were right that day to feel upset, betrayed, and stressed. He made the mistake, not you." He said, and I couldn't believe the words.

"No. I messed it all up. I should have trusted him. Isn't that what love is about- trust? Forgiveness? I didn't forgive him for making one little mistake, and he saw just how stupid I was. God, I'm so stupid!" I yelled, banging the wall again and then scratching harshly down my arm, wanting to feel pain.

"I"m stupid and ugly and worthless and nothing and empty and lost and broken and unloved and torn and ruined and alone! God, I don't even love myself! I never did! Louis left and so will everyone else! Everyone will leave me because it's only a matter of time before you all see how fucked up I am! Even my parents don't stay! They leave on these business trips, never taking me along. They can use school as an excuse, but they have the money for home schooling, too. You know why everyone leaves and lies? Because there is something wrong with me. Something ugly and unloveable. Maybe it's just me." I cried, and I knew I completely lost it all. I felt a bit numb, but I didn't want to. I liked the pain better.

"I should have died the day I took those pills." I croaked out, closing my eyes and feeling the tears slip out from underneath my eyelids. And everything was quiet, so quiet for a while. Until I felt myself being spun around and Niall looked at me with harsh eyes full of sadness and love. Love. 

"Don't say that. Don't you ever say that, Harry!" He said, sounding like he was also on the verge of tears. "Do you have any idea how much it would kill me if you weren't here? I care about you so fucking much, Harry. So many peopel do! We don't want you d- dead. We want you here. We need you here. I... I need you here." He whimpered out, and I looked at him, feeling so broken and dazed. And maybe nothing could fix the pain, but maybe something could distract it away.

I leaned in slowly until my lips were on Niall's own. He let out a shocked whimper, and gently pushed me away, making me almost completely break and fall to my knees, in tears that I now knew nobody wanted me.

"Don't you l-love me, Niall?" I asked cautiously, preparing myself for the rejection that I thought would come.

"Yes, Harry. I do love you, but you don't love me. You love Louis. You know it, I know it, we all know it." He said, but I still saw him looking at my lips with longing eyes.

"But Louis doesn't love me. And he broke me." I said, leaning in close again. "Please fix me, Niall. Please love me." I whispered before our lips met again. It took a hesitant second before Niall was kissing back and pushing me roughly against the wall in a sort of desperation.

I felt his lips move down to my neck, pressing kisses there, and when he latched on to suck, I couldn't help but think of Louis when he found out that Zayn had marked me. What would he do if he found out Niall did?

"You taste so sweet, Harry. You're skin is so soft. I love you." He said, and I nodded before kissing him again. We made our way over to the bed, and I let Niall climb inbetween my legs. I felt my breathing pick up, and eventhough the kissing and stuff felt good, it didn't feel like Louis. With Louis it was intense and magical. This wasn't that.

Niall's hands ran underneath my shirt, and I squeezed my eyes shut. This was so fucking hard to do, but I had to forget about Louis. Louis. Maybe I should think about him. Maybe it would make it bearable.

I closed my eyes and pictured Louis above me. Louis pulling my shirt off and kissing my skin. Louis whispering that he loved me. I felt him kiss along my throat, and I moaned out silently. Louis loved me. Louis had to love me. And I loved him, too.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LOUIS

I sat by the door, just rocking back and forth and saying my sorry that only seemed to come out in a whisper, as if I didn't want Harry to hear it. And maybe I didn't because that would only bring him back in. And I was bad for him.

But... how could I be bad for him if leaving him made him want to die? I hated thinking about that. Without Harry, I have nothing but this empty feeling inside. He was my reason for feeling, and I ruined that. I'm the one who's too afraid and insecure. I'm the one with the stupid idea to push him away before they take him away when really I should be spending every last possible second with him in my arms.

I missed holding him in my arms. I missed holding him as he fell asleep or as he woke up. I missed us. I missed kissing him whenever I wanted to. I missed touching him, even in the gentle and innocent way. I missed it all. I missed Harry. He was so near, but a thousand miles away.

Just apologize. And it would be easy enough to do. I needed to srop being scared and running from my fears. I needed to fix this with Harry because I couldn't think straight without him. I was just so in love with him, and this would not be how I wanted us to end.

I got up from the floor, wiping my eyes and putting on a determined face. Harry still loved me, and as long as I knew that, I could fix this. I loved him, too, and every moment without him wasn't worth living.

I pulled my door open and made my way down the hall to his room, feeling every single step I took getting slower and heavier. Negative thoughts started filling my mind. What if he already hated me? What if he meant it when he said he was done with me? No, he couldn't be. I loved him, and he loved me. I'd do everything I can to win his trust and his heart back.

I was feeling a bit better, just thinking about the possibility if winning him back. I thought about his beautiful smile, and how I'd love to see it again. I thought about his beautiful eyes and how I used to be able to look deep in them as we laid side by side. I remember the promise ring I gave him, and how we could start over with a new promise. We may have broken some, but I will still always be there for him. I will always love him, and getting him back will be the best feeling in the world.

I had a small smile on my face as I walked to his door. I was about to push it open, my hand already on the door knob, when I heard Niall's voice. 

"You taste so sweet, Harry. You're skin is so soft. I love you." That broke me. I froze in place. No. They couldn't be doing anything. Harry... Harry said he loved me. Me. Not Niall. Not anyone else. And I loved him. I was the only one he's ever slept with. He couldn't be- fuck! He just couldn't be.

A few moments went by, but it seemed so quick to my fast heartbeat. I heard Harry moan softly, and it broke me. I felt a tear slip down my cheek. How could he do this? How could he move on so quickly? I... I loved him. I loved him. He loved me. 

I was hurt. Hurt worse than anything could ever hurt me. If Harry thought me rejecting him was pain, it was nowhere close to hearing this. Hearing how someone else is offering him pleasure. That was supposed to be a bond that was only between the two of us. It was something special to me- even if I didn't realize it before.

I cried and slammed my fist into the wall, hurting my hand a bit. "FUCK!" I yelled as I hit it again and then walked quickly to my room. I felt so broken and out of control. I was back in that place where the anger seemed to overtake everything. I was seeing red.

I yelled as I pushed everything off of my dressers, throwing it all to the ground. I didn't care if anything was breakable- my heart was already broken, and that was all I thought I needed. Now, though, now I wanted to rip it out of my chest and leave it on the ground where it should be.

"FUCK! WHY THE HELL ARE YOU A MISTAKE, LOUIS!? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST DO WHAT YOU KNOW IS RIGHT THE FIRST CHANCE YOU GET, YOU SORRY FUCK!" I yelled out, feeling all the rage surge through my body as I grabbed my bed sheets, ripping them apart and loving the sound of the fabric tearing at the seams.

I threw my pillows at the wall, followed by whatever was on my nightstand. The clock shattered to pieces, but I was still in a rage. I felt all of the anger just rushing in my blood, making it boil. I chose to feel it though. Anger over hurt because at least I was familiar with it.

I stood there, looking at every little thing I broke. And it was all too much. I broke down, crashing on my knees to the ground and crying heavily. Even with the anger, I couldn't just push the pain away. Because it was Harry. He was the only thing that mattered, and I ruined that. We both did.

"I love you, Harry." I whispered as I cried. My chest hurt so much. It hurt like hell. I have never experienced this deep hurt, not even when my mum died. Not ever. Harry was my world, and now my world was in someone else's hands, feeling loved by someone else when it should have always been me right there by his side.

I couldn't do this right now. I needed some air. I needed some time to collect myself, even if the only way to do that was by bringing myself pain and realizing that maybe it's best for someone else to love Harry, but even the thought sounded wrong.

Still, I got up from the floor and left my room, going quickly into the living room where Liam and Zayn quickly stood up as I ran by to the door, getting the car keys off of the hook. I didn't care about a jumper right now. The freezing air would make me numb.

"Louis, what happened? Where are you going?" Zayn asked, looking from down the hall and right back at me. He seemed confused and worried.

"Does it matter? I just can't be here right now. I fucked everything up, and I just need some air and time to think everything over." I said. I was trying so hard not to break down again in front of Zayn and Liam. They may be my friends, but showing my worst emotions to them still terrified me.

"Do you want anyone with you? I mean, are you sure you can drive in this state? Your eyes are red rimmed and you seem too hurt. Louis, we're always here for you if you need us." He said, and Liam walked over, adding on to that.

"Yeah. You've helped us through a lot of things Louis, and you never once broke down. It's okay to hurt every once in a while. And we have your back. If you ever need us." He said.

It meant a lot to me. More than they could probably even imagine. I did break down, just a bit. I hugged them, which is something new for all of us. I was crying heavily, and just felt so weak. I hated feeling weak. Powerless.

"I know I've done things that weren't right. I've treated you both terribly. And I'm sorry. I'm just a messed up person. No excuse for that. I'm broken, and I know it. H- Hrry seems to be all that fixes that." I paused for a second, pulling away from the hug and turning my back in them as I opened the door.

"But he doesn't love me anymore. So I'm nothing. I'll be back later. Don't wait up." I said, leaving the house and getting into the car. I pushed the key into the ignition and drove down the road, taking random turns and streets. I didn't know where I wanted to go right now, but no matter the distance, it didn't take away the pain.


	34. It's Over; Always

LOUIS

His hands on Harry's skin. Running through his hair. Kissing up his neck. Breathing heavily. Making him moan out his name instead. Giving him pleasure only I should have been giving him. It all kept racing through my head.

I couldn't handle it. My knuckles gripped tightly onto the steering wheel. I hated everything. I hated Niall. I hated life. I hated myself. But... I didn't haye Harry. Even if I wanted to, all I could do is love him. Love him with all of my heart and soul.

But the thoughts and images kept coming. They kept racing through my mind. One after the other. Visual torments. I sped up, stomping on the gas pedal until it was nearly touching the car floor. I was crying, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything anymore. Except Harry.

Harry. I needed Harry. Harry was my drug. He took the pain away. He made me feel like I could breathe. He made me feel like things were going to be okay. But now he was in the arms of someone else. If they went along with it. A small part of me thought there's no way Harry went along with it, but the bigger part of me holds onto the fact that I pushed him to it. He needed love that I denied him. He could have been in my arms right now instead.

I pounded at my steering wheel, feeling like I was losing so much more than my mind. I felt the cold air from outside on my skin, making me numb on the surface, but it only made me feel so much more pain underneath. Stinging pain. Burning pain. Regretful pain. Heartbreak.

I was crying so badly now, thinking of Harry loving someone else. Being loved by someone else. Telling someone else that he loves them. Telling me that he no longer loves me. Calling me worthless and useless. Telling me the things I already know about myself. Telling me he never truly loved me, just like I told him that lie.

"FUCK!" I yelled loudly, banging my fists on the steering wheel in anger and trying to wipe some tears from my eyes, but they kept flowing right out. I squeezed them shut for a second and wiped away all the excess tears-useless and foolish of me.

I heard a car honk, and I opened my eyes, seeing that I was swiveling right for an oncoming truck. It was going fast, trying to keep up with the little car infront of it. "Shit!" I said, turning my steering wheel at the last second, a corner of the truck making my car spin around. I finally got it to stop and parked it on the side lane of the street. I came so close to death in that split second, but the only thing holding me back was the fact that Harry was still back home. He was still there, and I hurt him. I couldn't hurt him anymore.

"He wouldn't have cared." The voice in my head whispered. "He doesn't even love you." But it was right. He probably didn't love me. Who could love someone so angry? Someone so vile to everyone around him. I was toxic, and Harry still deserved better, but deep down I know nobody could love him more than I could.

I cried against the steering wheel, just thinking of ways I could possibly make Harry forgive me and take me back. I ruined him. He was so pure and innocent when he first got here, and I fucked with his mind and with him. It was a terrible thing for me to do, but I needed him ever since I first saw him.

"Get a fucking grip, Louis. Why would Harry want you back? You screwed him over and made him feel pain. Now it's your turn." I told myself, and it was true. I was feeling the pain. So much pain. All in my chest, suffocating me. Making it seem like, no matter what I do, my life is already over. It was over before Harry, and now it's over after him. I never knew I needed him this badly that he basically became a part of me, but I do. I always will.

I wiped my eyes as best I could, but I felt so upset and hopeless that the tears still fell, though more slowly due to how much I have already cried. I sniffled, feeling a horrible sting in my heart. I wanted a more numbing feeling, but alcohol wasn't an option right now. Even if Harry didn't love me anymore, I loved him and knew he would hate if anything happened to anyone while they were drinking and driving. Plus, it would make him feel guilty if I got hurt. He didn't deserve to feel that guilt.

I sighed, feeling like nothing else could go wrong in my life. I already lost Harry, so what was the point of a life anymore?

I looked up, looking outside of the window as cars passed by, and my eyes froze as I saw a cop parked across the street, probably waiting for anyone speeding or anything. When did he get there?

My heartbeat sped up as I noticed he was staring right at me. He picked up his radio and spoke into it, his eyes never leaving mine. I slowly moved my arm and turned my car on, getting ready to speed away if I had to.

There was no way he recognized me. There was no way the police could know who I was. I wasn't wearing my coat, and they never saw my face. But what if Harry was right? What if they saw the car, but chose not to release that information to the public? Or what if I left a footprint without realizing it or maybe fingerprints on the mailbox?

I was panicking, and I quickly put the car in drive, seeing the police officer get out of his car and yell at me. "Hey! Stop!" He yelled as I stepped on the gas, shifting into the lanes and making a few cars press their breaks harshly and honk their horns in annoyance and fear.

I looked in the rearview mirror and saw the officer get into his car and start it up, but my fear was only confirmed when the sirens turned on. Fuck fuck fuck! How the hell did they know it was me!? Why was I stupid enough to go to Harry's house?

That's when I remembered one small detail about Harry's house. It had cameras.

How could I forget about that? When Liam and Zayn raided the house for money that night, I warned them of the cameras and they took them out before being seen, but it completely slipped my mind- all of our minds it seemed. Shit! How could I be so reckless and clueless?

My heart beat was racing and my hands were shaky and sweaty as I raced down the street, trying to get as far away from the sound of sirens as possible. I needed to get to Harry. I needed to get him and run away. Leave everything behind. I would not give up on him. I still loved him. I needed him. And nobody was going to get in the way of that.  
\------------------------------------------------------

LIAM

"I'm honestly worried about Louis. He's been gone for quite awhile." I confessed to Zayn. We were sitting in my room on the bed, just being together and talking about everything that had been going on. It gives me such a headache to think about.

"Yeah, but he was pretty upset. He seemed hurt and broken. Maybe he just needs a few hours to himself. And who knows? Maybe those few hours will make him realize that he needs to not push Harry away and try his besy to get him back because I know they love each other. It's hard to see them so broken." Zayn replied.

"It is. Especially because Louis has been broken his whole life, but he's never mentioned a thing about it because it was underneath all the anger. To truly see him let it out, it's terrifying and hard to handle. And we don't know how he reacts to being broken. He could do something completely stupid." I said.

"Yeah. He could. But we have to trust Louis. He's been the leader for so long, and he has never truly let us down. Besides, I know that he wouldn't put Harry at risk by doing something stupid that may get him caught. He cares too much about him." Zayn said.

"That's true. What do you think made Louis so upset that he had to leave? I mean, he's never the one to walk away. He always wins the fights and leaves the other person beaten and vulnerable." I said. Nothing has ever truly gotten to Louis like this, and it just amazed me.

"I don't know. I don't know what led to him being that upset, but I do know one thing." Zayn said, and I looked up at him with a raised eyebrow.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Louis met his match. Harry is stronger than he seems."  
\------------------------------------------------------

   HARRY 

I was sitting alone on the couch, just crying my eyes out. I hated myself. I heard Louis's outrage. I heard it all. It made me feel horrible. I'm just such a horrible human being. But still, he didn't love me. He pushed me away, and I could not forgive that.

I let out a bitter chuckle as I wiped away a few more stray tears. "You fucked up, Harry. Big time." I whispered to myself. I hated everything about life right now. Maybe Niall was right- this was a toxic environment. Maybe I should want to go home.

I was about to turn the TV on when the front door opened quickly and then slammed shut. I jumped at the sudden noise and then Louis walked quickly into the living room. "We're leaving. Get anything you need." He said, walking over to look out of the window.

"What?" I asked, feeling so confused by all of this. Louis didn't even look at me as he said "Are you fucking deaf now, too? We're. Leaving." He looked out of the blinds and then shouted "LIAM! ZAYN! Get in here, now!"

I heard their footsteps comign quickly and they both appeared side by side, looking rather worried. "What is it? What's wrong?" Zayn asked Louis.

"I fucked up. A cop saw me. We have to go. Liam, get Niall and whatever you need to take. Small things, okay? Hurry up." He ordered, and Liam nodded as he left and Zayn followed right behind him, but I stayed on the couch- too shocked to move.

"What are you waiting for? Get the fuck up and get ready to go." Louis said in a bitter tone, but it seemed filled with something else. Hurt? No. He didn't love me. He couldn't love me. He said so hiself that he couldn't.

"You know what..." I began, feeling so broken and hurt and angry at Louis. "No. I'm not going." I said and he froze as he was leaving the room. He turned back to me with a cold glare.

"What the hell do you mean no?" He asked in a challenging tone.

"I mean no. I'm tired of being your fucking toy! You say you never even loved me, so why the hell would you still need me around? If you leave me here then the cops have no further reason to search for you constantly. Lay low and it'll die down." I said, and Louis growled.

"If you stay then I don't get my fucking money!" He shouted, and my mouth gaped open. After all this time, he brought up the money again. Maybe Niall was right. Maybe Louis was just trying to get me to like the idea of staying here. Maybe that was his game all along. Maybe the love wasn't real. Maybe it truly was one-sided. Maybe he laughed at me to Liam and Zayn because I was a fucking toy to him. Maybe he only was in it for the sex. Maybe his 'I love you' was a joke. I was only worth money.

I walked right up to Louis and slapped him hard, hearing the smack echo around the room. Not only was I pissed, I was hurt, I was broken, I felt used. I hated Louis. But I loved him.

"FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!" I yelled, pushing him backwards harder each time. I hated him. I punched at his chest and then he seemed to have had enough because he pushed me backwards, causing me to stumble a bit. He pushed me against the wall, making me cry out in pain at how hard my back hit the hard surface.

"Listen to me, Harry. You are going to go into your fucking room and get what little fucking shit you need. And then, we are all going to leave this place and go far away from England. Okay?" He said it as a demand, but I wasn't backing down this time.

We both glared at each other and I spit into his face, wanting him off of me. "Little bitch!" Louis yelled. I closed my eyes as I saw his hand pull back, but the hit never came.

I opened my eyes and saw Liam holding his hand back. Zayn held him back and Niall watched with wide eyes at the scene in front of him. "What the hell is going on!?" Liam asked, looking between us two.

"Nothing!" Louis yelled as he pushed Liam and Zayn off of him. "Go get your stuff, Harry or I will just drag you out of the fucking door. Either way, we're leaving." He said, his voice dripping with venom in each of his words. 

This was the Louis I first met. The Louis that terrified me with just his harsh stare, yet captivated me so much. The Louis that made me want to crawl away yet go closer at the same time. The Louis that gave me nightmares about being stuck onto a chain I could easily pull free, but a nightmare were I stayed, hoping for a better dream. The Louis that let anger consume every single aspect of his being. The Louis who felt so much pain, he couldn't express it correctly. The Louis that slapped me, stabbed my hand, made me weak. My Louis. My demon.

"I'm. Not. Leaving." I said, making each word a statement. I guess I got my own anger from Louis. All the hurt built up inside of me made me angry at everything. Mostly at myself for letting myself fall so hard in love with my kidnapper.

"Harry." He said in a demanding tone, and I shook my head. There was no way I was leaving. I couldn't be used by him anymore. The only way I'd leave is if he forcefully dragged me away, and even then, I was prepared to fight back.

"Harry, now." He said again, coming towards me and grabbing my arm. I pulled back, struggling a bit but managing. "No, Louis. I'm not going with you. I don't want to." I said, and I watched as his face fell a bit.

"Harry." He said in a weaker voice, his eyes holding sadness and shock in them. I wanted to break and just leave with him. I wanted to just pull him into a kiss and say I was sorry, but I couldn't. Stand strong, Harry. Hold your ground.

I only shook my head, feeling my heart break a little more. My heartbeat sped up as we all froze, hearing sirens nearby. "Harry, please." Louis begged now, his eyes holding so much sadness and hope that I would change my mind. He's used that on me before. That please. And it led us here.

A tear fell out of my eye, but I felt so numb. Numb and broken up inside. I slowly shook my head, seeing Louis's broken look on his face. "Louis, we have to go now." Liam said, trying to pull him away, but Louis shook him off, his eyes never leaving me.

"Fuck!" Zayn said as he looked out of the window, and all of us jumped when the door was kicked open, all of us but Louis. He held that broken and hurt look on his face as police filled the room, yelling orders to Louis, Liam, and Zayn.

"Hands in the air!" They said, but Louis never reacted. I feel like I ultimately broke him up inside, but he's done the same to me. He's hurt me exactly like I've hurt him now. We've both made our mistakes, but these last few we can't take back.

"Haz..." He whispered. 

"It's over, Lou."

I jumped back as a police grabbed Louis and harshly put his hands behind his back, already reading him his rights. Louis did nothing to fight back, not like I thought he would have. I turned away and made my way over to Niall, but I stopped when I heard Liam speaking up about Zayn.

"He didn't do anything! Please listen! We took him! We took him! He didn't want to be here! Tell them that, Harry!" He yelled.

"Is this true, Mr. Styles?" The policeman that was cuffing Zayn's hands behind his back asked me.

"Yes, it's true, you asshole! He was a runaway! We took him off the street! He never wanted to be here." Liam yelled at the officer, but he kept awaiting my answer.

"Liam, please don't do this." I heard Zayn whisper quietly. I had no idea what Liam was trying to do, but one look at his face made it obvious. He was trying to protect Zayn. Trying to keep him safe.

I opened my mouth to respond, seeing Zayn shaking his head, begging me not to say yes, but Liam's desperate plead broke me. He wanted me to protect the boy he loved. "Yes. It's true." I said, hearing Liam whisper a small thank you as Zayn let out a sob, crying harder as the officer let him go. The other officer that was holding Liam began to push him out of the door, Zayn trying to get to him, but I held him back.

"Liam! Liam! Harry let me go. Please! Liam!" He yelled after him, but I turned him to me and hugged him.

"He'll be okay, Zayn." I whispered before he was full on sobbing. "I love him." He cried, and I nodded, feeling my tears fall harder as I saw them pushing Louis out of the door right after Liam.

"I know you do. And he loves you." 

We were led outside by two police officers who said that they've called Niall and I's parents, but couldn't contact Zayn's. I already knew Zayn would be staying at my house. No question about it.

We were led into the back of one squad car, and right before the door was closed, I finally saw Louis putting up a fight as they tried to push him in the back of another one with Liam. He looked over to me and broke free for three seconds before they caught him by his arms.

"Harry. Haz, please! Please. I lo-" The door to our car as slammed shut, and I wiped my tears away as Louis was put into another car, that door also slamming shut. I waited until the sirens turned on before I whispered "I love you, too." I looked down at the necklace he gave me and felt more tears flood out of my eyes.

I read those inscriptions. "For your eyes only I show you my heart." I was a crying mess as I tried to also calm Zayn down. "I always will."


	35. Home

HARRY

I felt numb as I sat in the courtroom, waiting for the trial to begin. I knew that Louis and Liam would be brought out for it, and I didn't know what to expect. My mum and dad were ready, hard set expressions on their faces. To say they were angry at them would be a massive understatement.

Niall rubbed my shoulder and whispered "You'll be fine, Haz. You're home now." He said. I nodded, but it didn't feel like it. Home wasn't that mansion-like house where I spent so much time alone, going insane with nobody around. Home wasn't in my small home town where everyone seemed to only love me for the money. Home wasn't the place where I felt unloved and unimportant. That wasn't home. But I didn't know what was.

I looked over to where Zayn sat beside me. He was shaking his leg in anticipation. I knew he desperately wanted to see Liam. He wanted to make sure they were both doing okay, but I knew Liam was always first on him mind.

He hasn't really been happy since that day the police caught them. Without Liam, Zayn wasn't his usual self. He was broken. He barely started eating again. It took almost two weeks, but he can eat small things that are half-liquids, like pudding and jell-o. Too much of something seemed to make him sick though, and I knew what it was. He was heartbroken and depressed without Liam. Just like I was without Louis.

I haven't been eating much either these past couple of weeks. It wasn't hard to pretend I did eat because my parents were still as busy as ever. They hardly noticed if I was even at the table for dinner because with the media on us more often now, they had so much more to handle.

My thoughts were immediately cut off as the next case was announced and the big courtroom doors opened, Louis and Liam being escorted inside and up to the front of the room. Zayn perked up a bit upon seeing Liam, but I died a bit inside seeing Louis. It hurt so much.

"Louis Tomlinson and Liam Payne, you are both here for the kidnap and hostage of three young men, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan, and Harry Styles-" I saw Louis instantly look up from the ground as my name was said. It made my heart leap as he looked around the room and then made eye contact when he found me. His eyes held a familiar yet undistingishable look. Pleading? I had no clue, but it hurt so much that I still saw love in his eyes, but he told me he didn't love me, and I fucked up too badly to be forgiven.

"Mr. Tomlinson, eyes up front." The judge said, and Louis's stare lingered for a few seconds, each second taking my breath away. I loved him so fucking much- even now. "Thank you." She said as soon as his eyes were away, but I had the urge to call his name and make him look back at me.

"Mr. and Mrs. Styles, would you like to begin by listing your grievances?" The judge asked, and my mum and dad stood up and my mum spoke first.

"First off, there are no words to describe the emptiness we felt without Harry safe at home. He is our pride and joy, and having him taken away from us is something that can never be forgiven." She said, and I closed my eyes, not wanting to hear this. About how much they missed me. Why were they still never home then?

"We would just like to say that all those days, all those weeks without Harry, each one was worse than the one before. We got a call for ransom, and I felt hopeful that maybe we could find him based off of that call, but when the police asked for the phone to trace the contact, it was gone." I saw Niall shrink back a bit, remembering how he said he tracked the phone in attempts to save me and be my hero.

"We also heard his kidnappers cause him pain during the phone call." My mum announced. The judge nodded before asking for me to stand up. I hesitantly stood up, feeling everyone's eyes on me, but the only pair I cared about were those sadened blue eyes that belonged to the only person I've ever loved or will love.

"Mr. Styles-"

"Harry." I said quietly. "It's Harry." I said, feeling pressured and broken right now.

The judge nodded and said "Harry, can you please tell the court whether Mr. Tomlinson or Mr. Payne has caused you any harm." 

I looked around the court room, seeing Niall nodding for me to tell everything, Zayn begging me not to, my parents looking at me expectantly, Liam looking terrified, and then there was Louis. He was just looking at me blankly. But there was something else. One emotion that I can't describe. He's gone back into that unreadable state. I had no clue what he was feeling, but I knew that looking into his eyes right now hurt me terribly.

I closed my eyes as I said "Yes, I have been harmed. Once. Only once." I said, not wanting to mention the tanle incident or any of the other pain Louis put me through.

"Can you explain what happened?" The judge asked, and I took a deep breath. I didn't know if I could do this. I was basically lying by saying I was only hurt once, but nobody had to know. I didn't want to cause Louis any more trouble than he was already in. Why though? Why did I still care so much? I knew I still loved him, but he broke me even more. No. I knew that wasn't true deep inside. He loved me. But he couldn't. I wasn't special.

"It was the only time I ever got to speak to my parents on the phone. I told them not to give any money to them, and to show that he meant his threats, Lou- um... Mr. Tomlinson slapped me." I stated, not being able to say his name. I would probably break down if I did.

"And that was the only harm caused?" The judge asked and I confirmed that. "Why were no further harm or attempts attempts of ransom made?" The judge asked, and I shrugged.

"I guess they assumed they already had my parents where they wanted them. That they would pay the money if we waited it out. If they waited it out." I said, then as an after thought I stated "I wasn't starved or harmed though."

"So they did feed you and allow you to bathe?" The judge asked, and I nodded. Hopefully people would see that they weren't all bad. "Interesting fact. Thank you, Harry. Mr. Horan." She said, and Niall stood up. "What happened upon your arrival to the house? Did they cause you any harm either?" She asked him.

Niall looked at me for a moment before shaking his head. "No. I wasn't caused any harm. I was fed and allowed to bathe as well, but I was mostly kept locked up in a room. With Harry." He added, and I knew he was keeping me safe. Protecting me.

"And you were never allowed to leave that room?" Niall nodded. "Was Mr. Malik also in that room?" She asked, and I saw Liam's head quickly snap up to look over at Zayn. I saw the longing and desperation in his eyes. He probably missed Zayn and wanted to hold him. Heaven knows that's how I felt for Louis, but I couldn't feel that way. It was dangerous and painful.

"No. Zayn was kept in a different room. H-he was treated the same way." Niall said. I appreciated that Niall was keeping this story going. I knew it was hard for him. He didn't lie about things. Ever.

"Mr. Malik, please explain how you ended up in the house and for how long you have been there." The judge asked. I saw Zayn gulp, and I was scared he would slip and expose everything. He looked at Liam and their eyes met. I saw tears form in Zayn's eyes before he spoke in a shaky voice.

"Um... they took me off the street. I left home. Couldn't stay there anymore. I have no idea where my parents went or what happened to them, but I have a new home." I saw him look over at Liam, but he said "Harry and Niall." I knew he didn't mean us. He just had to keep this believeable. "They are my closest friends. I was kept there for years. Lost track after a while." He said with a breathless laugh.

"I see. Thank you. You may be seated." The judge said, frowning at Zayn's tears. He nodded and sat back down, curling into me as I wrapped an arm around me just like the day the police found us and he was taken apart from Liam. It killed me to know I wasn't the person he needed to be held by.

'I love you' I saw Zayn mouth to Liam as the judge turned her attention back to my parents. Liam smiled, looking ready to cry himself as he mouthed it back. I wish I could do the same to Louis. Sadly, it wasn't the same between us.

"Mr. Tomlinson and Mr. Payne. Now is your time to stand." The judge said and the both stood up. "First, I would like to address the issue that your lawyer says that under a psychological interview, you have the right to plea insanity-" I was a bit appalled by that. Insanity? What did they say in the interview?

"Well, Mr. Tomlinson can. Mr. Payne proved sane." She announced. It was probably due to all of Louis's anger. And I knew what pleaing insanity would do. He wouldn't have to stay in prison. He'd so to a psych ward where he would probably spend less time. I wouldn't be surprised if he chose that. I hope he did.

"I will not plea insanity. I'm not insane. I know what I did. I know I caused people pain. I tore a family apart. I held people... hostage. I caused scars that cannot heal. And I will do time for that." Louis said. My mouth fell open. Why wouldn't he just take the ward instead? He'd be out sooner.

He looked at me, making my heartbeat pick up as he said "And I'm sorry for causing that pain." He looked down them, not speaking anymore.

"You may be sorry, but this is still a crime. Mr. and Mrs. Styles, do you have anything else to say before a sentence is given?" She asked.

My dad shook his head, but my mum spoke up. "I would like to discuss the possibilities of a restraining order." She said, and my heart stopped. "I don't want there to be a possibilty of them ever being close to Harry again." She said.

I pulled her arm and said "Mum, that's not necessary." Call me crazy, but a part of me still hoped that something could still happen between Louis and me. I hoped.

"Harry, I will not risk your safety again. I-"

"It won't help. Even if I did get one, it's only a piece of paper. Not a savior. Mum, it's a waste of time and money. I'll be fine. I'll like carry pepper spray around or something." I said, trying to bargain with her. She looked at me hard and then sighed.

"Nevermind. The order will not be needed." She said, and I felt myself able to breathe again- even if it was only a little.

"In that case, Mr. Payne and Mr. Tomlinson, you are both sentenced to five years of imprisonment with work tasks being set for you." She said. I was glad it was only five years, but it would feel so long, and then I would probably never even see Louis ever again.

Police men came to take Louis and Liam away, and I felt Zayn shaking next to me. I hugged him, feeling like crying myself. "You're okay, Z. It'll be okay. Liam is strong. They both are." I whispered.

"I know. He did this for me. I love him so much." He said, and I nodded. "Do you still love Louis?" He asked, and I nodded as I looked over to where they were leaving the room through the huge wooden doors. Louis looked back at me once, holding so many emotions in his eyes. Love, hope, desperation, loss, regret, sadness, pain, but mostly fear. Louis had fear. I closed my eyes, feeling one tear fall out, and I wiped it away.

"So much." I whispered.  
\------------------------------------------------------

"Where are you going, Harry?" My mum asked as I grabbed my jacket and slipped it on.

"Out for a walk." I said.

"It's almost midnight! You can't go out now. What if-"

"What if I get kidnapped?" I asked. I didn't care about that. I just needed time away from everything. Today was a hard day. Zayn was crying all day and I held him until he fell asleep. Then there was Niall. He was trying to make me feel better, but it wouldn't work. He wasn't who I needed.

"I'll be fine. Pepper spray, remember?" I said. She was going to say something, but I stopped her. "I'll be back soon." I said before I turned and left the house.

It was dark out, but I knew my hometown inside and out. I knew every turn to it. It was familiar, but it wasn't truly home. It didn't feel like home. I was still unsure what home meant. What home was.

I walked to the park, sitting down beside the duck pond and watching a few of them swim through the moonlit water. It was beautiful, but I couldn't help but think of a more beautiful blue. Soft, blue eyes and a perfect smile.

￼  
I missed spending time with him. All the memories we had. All the memories we shared. Like the day in the snow.

It was all so special to me. That was my birthday. The day we spent all day together just being content with each other. I loved everything about it. The way the snow fell and stuck on his eyelashes, the way his cheek bones looked perfect and his cheeks red from the cold. He was beautiful, and I was lucky.

I remember when I cried and he would hold me and tell me that everything was going to be okay. That I was beautiful. That I was worth it. That I wasn't nothing because I was his world. When he sat me down and said out broken heart were one.

￼He was my strength. My rock. My everything. We were both broken, but we were whole together. I felt the tears falling down my cheeks, and I spoke softly in a broken voice, somehow hoping Louis would hear me.

"I love you, Louis. And I'm so sorry. I messed up. And now it feels like it's too late. But I love you. I always will." I cried out, feeling the wind blow gently as the cool air washed over me. It hurt. I felt so much pain, but I needed to hold onto the hope I had. It was a sliver of it, but I needed to hold on.

I looked down and took my necklace into my hand. I ran my fingers over the engravings, crying harder than I ever have in my life. Because now I knew. I knew and I was 100% sure. I loved Louis more than I loved life. More than I loved anyone. More than anything. Because he was it. He was the one for me. Whether it was stockholm syndrome or not, I was aware that it was true love that we had. And I would never give it up because as much as it scared and and broke me up inside, I knew Louis was home.


	36. Sequel

Sorry for the sad ending, but the sequel is called No Control, and I will be posting it soon! Thanks so much for reading! Hope you all enjoyed! :)


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